Respect Shown to Others

THE Scriptures tell us to “honor men of all sorts” and “to speak injuriously of no one.” (1 Pet. 2:17; Titus 3:2) Indeed, every human we meet has “come into existence ‘in the likeness of God.’” (Jas. 3:9) Each person is someone for whom Christ died. (John 3:16) And all deserve to hear the good news in order to act on it and be saved. (2 Pet. 3:9) Some people have qualities or authority that merit special deference.

Why might some people try to excuse themselves from showing the sort of respect that the Bible encourages? Local culture may dictate who is eligible for honor according to caste, color, gender, health, age, wealth, or social status. Widespread corruption among public officials has eroded respect for authority. In some lands people are greatly dissatisfied with their lot in life, perhaps working long hours just to have the bare necessities, and they are surrounded by people who do not manifest respect. Youths experience peer pressure to join in rebellion against unpopular teachers and other authority figures. Many are influenced by television’s portrayal of children outsmarting and dominating their parents. It takes effort to keep such fleshly concepts from altering our regard for others. Yet, when we accord people dignity, this engenders an atmosphere in which an interchange of ideas is more readily possible.

Respectful Approach. A person who is engaging in religious work is expected to show respect by dressing and acting appropriately. What is viewed as appropriate decorum varies from place to place. Some consider it disrespectful to approach another person while wearing a hat or having one hand in a pocket. In other places, people might accept such decorum. Take local feelings into account so as not to offend. Doing so can help you to avoid impediments to your making known the good news effectively.

The same applies to our manner of addressing others, especially those who are elderly. It is generally viewed as impertinent for youths to sign in an overly casual manner with adults they do not know very well. If an older one is sitting, sit down with him so that he will not strain his neck looking up at you. Depending on your sign-language field, you may also need to sign more slowly or fingerspell more words.

Respectful Acknowledgment. In smaller communities it is expected that you will acknowledge the presence of someone you encounter, either while walking along the road or when entering a room. This is accomplished by means of a simple greeting, a smile, a nod of the head, or even the raising of the eyebrows. Ignoring another person is viewed as disrespectful.

You should also understand deaf culture and respect it in all situations. For example, if you need to get the attention of someone far from you, it would be appropriate to wave broadly, turn the lights on and off, or tap the table or desk so the deaf person will feel the vibrations. However, waving your hand in the face of someone nearby is considered rude. If he is talking to someone else and you discern that the conversation is not private or will soon end, you could politely wait. At other times you might lightly tap his shoulder to get his attention. He may look at you briefly or not at all, but the tap will alert him that, when his conversation is finished, you would like his attention. It is best to walk around areas where others are involved in a conversation. However, if this is not possible, it is usually less distracting if you beg their pardon and pass through rather than stand nearby waiting for the conversation to end. Be alert to other areas as well where you can show respect for deaf culture.

Some, though, may feel ignored even if you acknowledge their presence. How so? Because of their perception that you fail to see them as individuals. It is not uncommon for people to be categorized by some physical trait. People with disabilities and health problems are often shunned. Yet, God’s Word shows us how to treat such individuals with love and respect. (Matt. 8:2, 3) All of us are affected in some way by our inheritance of Adamic sin. Would you feel respected if others always identified you by your flaws? Would you not rather want to be recognized for your many positive qualities? Children likewise can be treated with respect by your sitting or kneeling and signing in a simple manner when you are speaking to them.

Respect also involves acknowledging headship. In some places it is necessary to speak to the head of the house before witnessing to others in the household. Although our commission to preach and teach comes from Jehovah, we recognize that parents are the ones authorized by God to train, discipline, and direct their children. (Eph. 6:1-4) Hence, when calling at a home, it is usually appropriate to speak first to the parents before engaging children in any extended discussion.

With age comes life experience that must be respected. (Job 32:6, 7) Acknowledging this helped a young pioneer sister in Sri Lanka who called on an elderly man. He at first objected to her visit, saying: “How can a youngster like you teach me the Bible?” But she replied: “Really, I didn’t come to teach but to share with you something I learned that made me so happy I just have to tell others.” The pioneer’s respectful response aroused the man’s interest. “Then tell me, what did you learn?” he asked. “I have learned how to live forever,” she said. The elderly man began to study the Bible with Jehovah’s Witnesses. Not all older people will voice a desire to be treated with such respect, but most will appreciate it.

It is possible, however, to carry displays of deference too far. In the islands of the Pacific and elsewhere, the respectful use of the customary form of address when approaching village or tribal chiefs can help the Witnesses to gain a hearing ear and an opportunity to speak to both the chiefs and the people under their jurisdiction. Yet, flattery is neither necessary nor proper. (Prov. 29:5) Similarly, a language may include honorifics as part of its grammar, but Christian respect does not require that these be multiplied excessively.

Respectful Delivery. The Bible urges us to explain the reason for our hope “with a mild temper and deep respect.” (1 Pet. 3:15) So, although we might be able quickly to expose the flaws of another person’s viewpoint, is it wise to do so in a manner that may deprive him of his dignity? Might it not be better to listen patiently, perhaps ask why he feels the way he does, and then take his feelings into account as we reason with him from the Scriptures?

Respect like that shown in one-on-one situations should also be evident when addressing an audience from the platform. A speaker who respects his audience will not harshly criticize them or exude an attitude that implies: “You could do this if you really wanted to.” Speaking in such a manner only discourages others. How much better to view the audience as an assembly of people who love Jehovah and want to serve him! In imitation of Jesus, we should show understanding when dealing with those who may be spiritually weak, less experienced, or slower to apply Bible counsel.

The audience will sense the speaker’s respect for them if he includes himself as one needing to apply God’s Word more fully. Thus, it is wise to avoid constant use of the personal pronoun “you” when applying scriptures. Note, for example, the difference between the question “Are you doing everything that you can?” and the statement “Each of us does well to ask himself: ‘Am I doing everything that I can?’” The point of each question is the same, but the first implies that the speaker does not put himself on the same level as his audience. The second encourages each person, including the speaker, to analyze his own situation and his own motives.

Resist the temptation to make witty remarks just for the sake of making the audience laugh. This detracts from the dignity of the Bible’s message. True, we should take delight in our service to God. There may even be facets of our assigned material that are somewhat humorous. Yet, to reduce serious matters to laughing matters betrays a lack of respect for the audience and for God.

May our approach, our demeanor, and our speech always demonstrate that we have come to view others the way that Jehovah has taught us to see them.