Young People Ask . . .

How Can I Be a Good Baby-Sitter?

‘WE’D like you to look after your little brother and sister.’

Whether you view such an assignment as an irritating inconvenience or a vote of confidence, the thought of being left alone with your siblings may make you uneasy. ‘What if they misbehave?’ you may wonder. ‘What if there is an intruder or a fire? And what if one of them gets hurt or sick?’

You have reason to be concerned. After all, children are not objects or playthings but people with very special needs. They are precious both to their parents and to God. (Psalm 127:3) So whether you are looking after siblings or baby-sitting for profit, caring for children is a responsible and demanding job. However, with the right attitude and good planning, you can make a success of it.

Dictator or Care Giver?

Some youths seem to feel that an assignment to baby-sit is an appointment to be a dictator. “My sister wouldn’t let me do this, and she wouldn’t let me do that!” complained one girl. “I tried to get her to stop bossing me around, and she slapped me!” One young boy says: “I’ve had my older brother and sister baby-sit me, and it’s surprising how fast power can go to their heads!”

Barking orders like a drill sergeant may seem like fun. But if your parents find out​—as likely they will—​your “reign” may come to an embarrassingly abrupt end. Proverbs 11:2 warns: “Has presumptuousness come? Then dishonor will come.”

“Wisdom is with the modest ones,” continues the same proverb. Modesty involves knowing your limitations. And the fact is that parents​—not baby-sitters—​are divinely authorized to raise and discipline children. (Ephesians 6:4) Your role is that of protector and care giver.

Skillful Child Care

This does not mean that children can be allowed to run free so that you can enjoy yourself watching TV or reading. “A boy [or girl] let on the loose will be causing his mother shame”​—and a lot of headaches for the baby-sitter! (Proverbs 29:15) Unfortunately, teenagers do not always handle misbehaving children skillfully.

One group of U.S. teenagers were tested in this regard and asked how they would handle situations that commonly arise during baby-sitting. According to the journal Adolescence, only 8 percent of the youths indicated that they would handle matters in a way that was sensitive to the feelings of the children. The remaining 92 percent tended to use ineffective tactics, such as commands, reprimands, and threats. The researchers concluded that adolescents “tend to be insensitive in their relations with younger siblings.”

How can you deal with children effectively and skillfully? Christian shepherds are urged: “You ought to know positively the appearance of your flock. Set your heart to your droves.” (Proverbs 27:23) Similarly, you should strive to understand the needs and feelings of the children you care for. Get to know them as individuals. You’ll soon learn that small children simply do not have an adult’s attention span, patience, or stamina. Rather, “children are delicate.” (Genesis 33:13) They thrive on love and attention but may quickly become bored and restless.

Applying the Golden Rule

At times, then, children get carried away in their play and may get on your nerves. They may endanger themselves with reckless behavior. Or they may try to test you to see how much they can get away with. (“Sometimes I play tricks on my baby sitters,” admits seven-year-old Douglas.) When this occurs, do not lose your sense of humor. Apply the Golden Rule: “Always treat others as you would like them to treat you.”​—Matthew 7:12, The New English Bible.

Remember, “foolishness is tied up with the heart of a boy,” or a girl, and it wasn’t too long ago that you behaved similarly. (Proverbs 22:15) Focus on correcting the problem (“let’s clean up that spill”) instead of condemning the child. Avoid flying off the handle and “speaking thoughtlessly as with the stabs of a sword.” (Proverbs 12:18) Calling a child “stupid” or “dumb” is abusive and potentially harmful to the child. Proverbs 29:11 (Today’s English Version) reminds us: “Stupid people express their anger openly, but sensible people are patient and hold it back.” One young Christian girl says: “When I feel like hitting my eight-year-old sister, I say a prayer, and that helps me control my temper.”

Problems can sometimes be prevented if you take a positive approach. Rewarding good behavior may work better for you than a barrage of threats of punishment. Also, children are less likely to be bored and restless if you plan wholesome activities that are fun, such as imaginative games. (Compare Matthew 11:16, 17.) Perhaps you recall some of the ones you played as a child​—or you can invent some new ones. You might also try reading the child’s favorite portions of the publications Listening to the Great Teacher or My Book of Bible Stories.a

At times children do need discipline. But it is best to discuss with your parents what you should do in this regard. This is especially true when you are baby-sitting for hire. Most problems can wait until the parents return home. And you risk injuring a child (not to mention incurring parental wrath) if you take it upon yourself to use physical force. Warns Proverbs 13:10: “By presumptuousness one only causes a struggle, but with those consulting together there is wisdom.”

Protecting Children From Harm

Barbara Benton warns in her book The Babysitter’s Handbook: “The combination of his unsteadiness, his curiosity, and his total lack of judgment make the toddler a prime victim for all the terrible things that can happen to children. You need to be ever watchful​—and quick—​to keep him safe.” Teenage Stephanie learned how true this is. “I was looking after my nephew,” she recalls. “Suddenly he began choking on a Popsicle! I had to pull it out of his mouth, and I was real scared!”

Most serious accidents can be prevented if you keep your eye on the children. Barbara Benton suggests yet other steps: “Make an inspection tour to locate and eliminate any potential hazards.” You should know the location of such things as the fuse box, fire extinguisher, and first-aid supplies. Learn how to operate home appliances properly and safely. You might even make up a safety checklist that covers such things as windows (closed?), stairs (free of dangerous objects?), electrical outlets (properly covered?), poisons and medicines (carefully stored out of reach of youngsters?), electrical cords (tucked away?), house keys (an extra set so you cannot lock yourself out?).

You can also prepare yourself as best you can to handle emergencies. “I took a baby-sitting class in school and learned first aid for babies and toddlers,” says one teenage girl. Perhaps such courses are available in your school. It is also important to keep handy a list that gives the phone numbers of police, fire department, family doctor, hospital, and poison-control center. Know how to contact your parents and perhaps some neighbors who could help out in a pinch.

If an accident or an emergency occurs, DO NOT PANIC! “He that is wise keeps [his spirit] calm to the last.” (Proverbs 29:11) A child might swallow some poison, for example. Immediately call the hospital or the poison-control center. If that is not possible, carefully read the instructions on the product’s warning label. Calmly assessing the situation is better than doing something foolhardy (such as inducing vomiting) that could make the situation worse. And as distressing and perhaps embarrassing as it may be, make sure that you report any injuries or mishaps to the child’s parents. They have a right to know what has occurred, and they can decide if further steps should be taken.

Baby-sitting may seem like a huge responsibility​—and it is. But it is merely a sampling of what your parents have done over the years in caring for you. So take your job seriously. As you gain confidence and experience, it may become rewarding and enjoyable for you.

[Footnotes]

[Box on page 21]

Guidelines for Baby-Sitting

Be professional. Make sure your fee is clearly agreed upon.

Communicate. Establish beforehand what your duties will involve.

Be punctual and dependable.

Get to know the children beforehand.

Know the rules of the house.

[Picture on page 20]

Children need constant attention if they are to be protected from harm