In Rhodesia, marriages must be legally registered by a government agent in order to have official recognition. At one time this was not the case. The marriage celebration had to be carried out according to African custom, an unwritten law, in order to receive recognition in the community. Among other things, this involved the payment of a bride-price, or lobola, as well as the presence of a go-between to establish approval of the marriage by the parents or guardians. Even today many an African woman, although in possession of a marriage registration certificate, does not consider herself really married unless these customary practices have been followed.

These are examples of commonly practiced customs that are not necessarily bad, unless, of course, they are misused.

Today we also have customs that can lead to spiritual shipwreck unless we have a strong dependence on God’s Word. In Rhodesia, for instance, it is customary for a newly married man to leave his wife in his home village and go to the city for secular work. According to unwritten law, he must do so or be censured by the community. But what generally happens when this custom is followed? Once in the city, the man has to have accommodations. So he finds a room, probably sharing it with one or more other persons. In time, he begins to feel the need for someone to cook his meals and wash his clothes. So he looks for what is called a mapoto wife. Mapoto is simply a term derived from the English word “pot” and transliterated into the Shona language. This woman not only cares for the man’s household needs but also satisfies his sexual cravings. So the situation becomes a matter of living in adultery.

But what about the wife back in the village? She cares for the fields, the domestic animals and the children, and she may see her husband only once or twice a year. Without a husband at home most of the time, the woman also is sorely tempted to commit immorality. So here is a case where a customary practice can lead to a direct violation of God’s pure Word of truth. The Bible says that when a man and a woman enter wedlock they become one flesh and should therefore stick together. (Matt. 19:5, 6) Of course, there may be occasions when a husband or a wife finds it necessary to be separated from his or her mate for a time, possibly due to unforeseen circumstances. Or, this may even take place by mutual consent so that some temporary obligation can be fulfilled. But when living separately becomes a practice, as in the example just cited, it can lead to great harm.