Show Honor to the “Weaker Vessel”

13. (a) First Peter 3:7 shows that a husband must do what? (b) What emotional need makes a woman the “weaker vessel”?

¹³ “You husbands,” wrote the apostle Peter, “continue dwelling in like manner with [your wives] according to knowledge, assigning them honor as to a weaker vessel, the feminine one.” (1 Peter 3:7) You must have knowledge of your wife’s emotional makeup, which is basically why she is considered the weaker vessel. A wife must sense that she is loved and cherished by her husband. Without this one ingredient​—despite what material goods she has—​she will feel inadequate. She must be convinced that her husband feels as did the husband of long ago who said to his wife: “There are many daughters that have shown capableness, but you​—you have ascended above them all.”​—Proverbs 31:28, 29.

The Wife’s “Due”

16. What area of marriage has many problems, and how is unselfishness indicated at 1 Corinthians 7:3, 4?

¹⁶ Your self-sacrifice is especially necessary with the marital “due.” “Let the husband render to his wife her due; but let the wife also do likewise to her husband. The wife does not exercise authority over her own body, but her husband does; likewise, also, the husband does not exercise authority over his own body, but his wife does.” (1 Corinthians 7:3, 4) Problems abound in this sensitive relationship. Some research studies have shown that one half of all couples will experience a serious sexual problem at some time during their marriage.

17. (a) What should be included in paying a wife her marital due? (b) How does one researcher explain the needs of a wife?

¹⁷ Many husbands often equate their wife’s needs or sexual “due” with their own. In a completely different avenue Paul showed that not all “dues” are alike. At Romans 13:7 some governmental officials are due the tax, others the tribute, still others honor. The due required depends on the specific need or request of the individual. As to the marital due of your wife, more than physical union is necessary. In The Family, Society, and the Individual, researcher William M. Kephart states: “The essence of female sexuality, then, can best be described in terms of love and affection. . . . During sex activities the average woman is perhaps as much concerned with amatory behavior​—being held, caressed, kissed . . . it seems to be in the nature of women to think of sex in terms of tenderness and love, rather than as an isolated physical drive.”

18. What can create self-centeredness?

¹⁸ Your wife’s emotional makeup as the “weaker vessel” requires that you be self-sacrificing and not merely concerned with your own satisfaction. Furthermore, being entertained by material that features sex can create an improper “sexual appetite” and lead to self-centeredness, making common and crude what should be beautiful. Avoid such material like the plague! (Colossians 3:5) But patiently, through expressions of tender love, render to your wife her full due.​—1 Corinthians 10:24.

Self-Sacrifice Touches the Heart

19. If a husband is self-sacrificing, should a Christian wife take advantage of it?

¹⁹ With such emphasis on the husband’s self-sacrifice you may feel, ‘Will not wives take advantage of it​—always insisting on their own way?’ That should not be the case! Christian wives should respond as the congregation did to Jesus’ self-sacrificing love. Paul writes: “The love the Christ has compels us . . . and he died for all that those who live might live no longer for themselves.” (2 Corinthians 5:14, 15) So, too, your wife should respond with unselfishness. As one happy Christian wife said: “I will knock myself out for my husband so that we can keep serving in a very difficult theocratic assignment, because I know he cares about me.”