NOT many years ago it was a common thing for married men in the southern provinces of China to leave their families behind, knowing full well that they would not see their wives and children again for ten, twenty or more years. They would travel to a foreign country and there work day and night like slaves, living frugally and saving as much as possible for the time when they would return home. Their great goal was to retire. This meant buying a piece of land so that they could enjoy its produce during the remaining years of their life. They considered gaining that goal to be a great achievement.

What about those persons who did not go abroad seeking fortunes, but who stayed behind in their own country? They too pursued a similar goal in life. They worked very hard, often seven days a week, ten to twelve hours a day, making money and laying it away in the hope of retiring and living comfortably until they died.

In the end, were these people who made wealth their chief goal in life happy and contented? They had spent tremendous amounts of time and energy in their effort. As family members they had very little time to be together and do things together, and, hence, little attention was devoted to building up a warm and loving family relationship.

This passionate pursuit of material wealth as a grand prize is a concept that penetrates the thinking and activity of a great many Chinese people. This, in turn, influences their view of such matters as family relationships. For example, the rearing of children is viewed by them somewhat like taking out an insurance policy. The parents provide the young children with the necessities of life and education, so that when they are grown up they, in turn, can pay back their debt by supporting their parents, even though the parents are fully able to work.

In one case a boy asked his parents: “Didn’t you raise me for love?” They replied: “No, for money!” In another instance, a tourist was told while traveling through the Orient, “You Americans have social security to take care of you in your old age, but we have children!”

Others work like slaves to accumulate wealth, ruining their health and leaving little or no time to spend with their loved ones. Many young people feel, not without justification, that overemphasis on materialism within the family weakens the love of parents for their children as well as respect of the children for their parents.