• How to Give Advice
    The Watchtower (Study)—2025 | July

    • GIVING COUNSEL WITHOUT BEING ASKED

      9. Before giving counsel, of what must elders be sure? (Galatians 6:1)

      9 From time to time, elders must take the initiative to give counsel to a brother or a sister who has taken “a false step.” (Read Galatians 6:1.) A study note on this verse says that such a person “is heading in the wrong direction, though he may not yet have committed a serious sin.” The goal of the elders is to help the person remain on the road that leads to everlasting life. (Jas. 5:19, 20) For their counsel to be effective, however, they first need to make sure that the person has really taken a false step. Jehovah allows all of us to make decisions based on our own conscience. (Rom. 14:1-4) What, though, if a brother has indeed taken a false step and the elders decide that they must take the initiative to give him some counsel?

      10-12. When giving unsolicited counsel, what should elders do? Illustrate. (See also pictures.)

      10 Elders who must give unsolicited counsel face a particular challenge. In what way? The apostle Paul said that a person might take a false step before he is aware of it. So the elders should first of all prepare the person to receive the counsel.

      11 Giving unsolicited counsel can be like trying to grow plants in hardened soil. Before a farmer starts sowing, he tills the soil. This softens the ground and prepares it to receive the seed. He then plants the seed. Finally, he waters the seed to help it grow. Similarly, before an elder gives unsolicited counsel, he does well to prepare the ground, so to speak. For example, at a convenient time to talk, the elder assures the brother that he has his best interests at heart. If a counselor has the reputation of being loving and kind, it will be easier for others to accept his advice.

      12 During the discussion, the elder can continue to soften the ground by acknowledging that everyone makes mistakes and needs counsel from time to time. (Rom. 3:23) In a calm voice and with deep respect, the elder clearly shows him from the Scriptures how he has taken a false step. Once the brother acknowledges that he has made a mistake, the elder “plants the seed” by explaining to him, in simple terms, what he needs to do to try to correct the situation. Finally, the elder “waters” the seed by sincerely commending the brother and by praying with him.​—Jas. 5:15.

      Scenes comparing an elder giving counsel to a brother with a farmer planting a seed in hardened soil. 1. Prepare the ground: The farmer tills the soil; the elder speaks warmly to the brother. 2. Plant: The farmer places a seed in the tilled soil; the elder uses the Bible to reason with the brother. 3. Water: The farmer waters the planted seed; the elder prays with the brother.

      Giving unsolicited counsel takes love and skill (See paragraphs 10-12)

      13. How can elders make sure that the person understands the counsel?

      13 Sometimes, what the counselor says and what the person receiving the counsel hears are two different things. What can elders do to keep that from happening? They can drive the key points home by respectfully asking tactful questions. (Eccl. 12:11) The answers will help the counselor make sure that the person understands the counsel he was given.