The Discipline of Loving Parents

Within the family circle and within the Christian congregation, there is a need for all to understand the purpose of discipline. This is especially true of those who are in positions of authority, such as parents. Proverbs 13:24 states: “The one holding back his rod is hating his son, but the one loving him is he that does look for him with discipline.”

How are parents to administer discipline? The Bible explains: “You, fathers, do not be irritating your children, but go on bringing them up in the discipline and mental-regulating of Jehovah.” (Ephesians 6:4) This admonition is reiterated in these words: “You fathers, do not be exasperating your children, so that they do not become downhearted.”​—Colossians 3:21.

Christian parents who understand the purpose of discipline will not act harshly. The principle stated at 2 Timothy 2:24 can be applied to the manner in which parents administer discipline. Paul wrote: “A slave of the Lord does not need to fight, but needs to be gentle toward all, qualified to teach.” Hysterical bursts of anger, screaming, and insulting or derogatory statements hardly qualify as loving discipline and have no place in a Christian’s life.​—Ephesians 4:31; Colossians 3:8.

Parental correction involves far more than an act of punishment administered quickly and decisively. Most children need repeated admonition before they correct their thinking. Thus, parents must spend time, exercise patience, and give much thought to the manner in which they administer discipline. They must keep in mind that children are to be brought up in the “discipline and mental-regulating of Jehovah.” This means a course of training that lasts for years.

Jehovah Is the Perfect Judge

Parents, Christian shepherds, and others who have the Scriptural authority to administer discipline should take such a responsibility seriously. They must not presume to judge others as permanently incorrigible. Hence, their discipline should never take the form of vengeful or hostile punishment.

True, the Bible refers to Jehovah as one who will administer severe and final punishment. In fact, the Scriptures say that “it is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.” (Hebrews 10:31) But no human should ever try to compare himself to Jehovah in this or any other regard. And no one should have reason to feel that it is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of a parent or a certain elder in the congregation.

Jehovah has the ability to achieve perfect balance when administering discipline. Humans do not. God can read the heart and determine when someone is beyond correction and thus is in line for decisive and final punishment. Humans, on the other hand, are unable to render such a judgment. For that reason, when there is a need to administer discipline, those in a position of authority should always do it with the purpose of correcting.