Jehovah Remembers the Sick and the Elderly

HAVING to face a “time of calamity” can be very hard. (Psalm 37:18, 19) Such a time may come in the form of advancing age and the weaknesses that go with it. Some enter a time of calamity when they suffer serious, long-term illness. They may feel as if their disease is taking charge of their life, dominating all their thoughts and actions.

It is reassuring, though, to remember that Jehovah keeps his eyes on all his servants. It makes his heart rejoice when his devoted servants continue to display loyalty and wisdom in spite of old age, sickness, or other trying circumstances. (2 Chronicles 16:9a; Proverbs 27:11) King David assures us: “Jehovah is near to all those calling upon him, . . . and their cry for help he will hear.” Yes, he is aware of their struggle; he strengthens them with his spirit. “And he will save them.” He remembers them and helps them to endure. (Psalm 145:18, 19) But what about us? Do we, like Jehovah, remember the sick and the elderly?

Weaknesses due to sickness or old age are realities of life in this present system. They are facts that we must contend with until Jehovah brings to fruition his purpose for the earth and mankind. Today, more and more people live to quite an advanced age, so a great number are acquainted with the weaknesses of such. Additionally, while still young, many are struck by life-threatening or disabling accidents or diseases. Until this old world passes away, sickness and old age will continue to be major challenges.

How we appreciate our sick and elderly ones who continue as examples in “the suffering of evil and the exercising of patience”! Yes, “we pronounce happy those who have endured.” (James 5:10, 11) Many older ones whose powers are now reduced have shared for decades in the teaching, training, and molding of those who now take the lead in the congregation. A number of older ones also rejoice to see that their children have shared in the full-time ministry.​—Psalm 71:17, 18; 3 John 4.

In a similar way, we appreciate those among us who are seriously ill and yet, despite their sufferings, manage to encourage us through their faithfulness. When these give proof of their hope without wavering, the result is most stimulating and faith strengthening. Their peace of mind and contentment reveal a faith that is truly worth imitating.

It is a shock for someone suddenly to be struck by cancer, a stroke, or some other condition that totally changes that one’s life. It is also a hard test for parents to see their children fall ill or suffer as a result of an accident. What can others do to help? Any such time of calamity is a test for the whole Christian brotherhood. It is an opportunity to show that ‘a true companion is a brother that is born for when there is distress.’ (Proverbs 17:17) Naturally, not all sick ones and elderly ones can expect personal assistance from each and every member of the congregation. But Jehovah will see to it that through his spirit many feel moved to help in various ways. And the elders can keep their eye on things to be sure that no one is overlooked.​—See Exodus 18:17, 18.

Try to Understand

In trying to help someone, it is important to have good communication, and that takes time, patience, and empathy. As a helper, you naturally desire to ‘strengthen with words’; but listen carefully before you speak or act, or you may end up becoming a ‘troublesome comforter.’​—Job 16:2, 5.

The sick and the elderly will at times find it hard to hide their frustration. Many have cherished their hope of living to survive the great tribulation, and now they feel caught up in a race with time, a race that they do not feel sure they will win. Also, their condition often makes them tired and anxious. Keeping faith alive and strong is a struggle, especially when one can no longer follow the heart’s desire of having a full share in the Christian ministry. One Christian elder visited an elderly sister; when praying with her, he asked that Jehovah forgive our sins. After the prayer he noticed that the sister was crying. She explained that she felt she needed Jehovah’s special forgiveness for not being able to share in the house-to-house preaching anymore. Yes, the feeling of being incapable or inadequate, though often unwarranted, can make a person very sad at heart.

Be aware that anxiety and fatigue can affect mental balance. Because of the weaknesses of old age or the stress of debilitating sickness, a person may feel forsaken by Jehovah, perhaps saying: “What have I done? Why me?” Remember the words of Proverbs 12:25: “Anxious care in the heart of a man is what will cause it to bow down, but the good word is what makes it rejoice.” Try to find good words that will comfort. Elderly ones who are in pain may even, like Job, express a desire to die. This need not be shocking; try to understand. Such complaints are not necessarily evidence of a lack of faith or trust. Job prayed to be ‘concealed in Sheol,’ yet his words right after that expression reveal his solid faith that Jehovah would later raise him up. Strong faith makes it possible to go through periods of anguish and depression and still stay close to Jehovah.​—Job 14:13-15.

Showing Honor to Sick and Elderly Ones

It is of utmost importance to treat sick and elderly ones with honor and dignity. (Romans 12:10) If they do not react as quickly as before or cannot do as much, do not lose your patience. Do not be quick to step in and take charge. No matter how well-meaning we are, if we behave in a domineering or authoritarian way, it invariably deprives the other person of self-esteem. In a doctoral thesis published in 1988, a researcher, Jette Ingerslev, explained what a group of 85-year-olds themselves considered most important for their quality of life: “They gave three areas high priority: being with relatives; good health; and last but not least, being able to make their own decisions.” Notice that the patriarch Jacob was not patronized by his sons when he had grown old; his wishes were respected.​—Genesis 47:29, 30; 48:17-20.

Those who are ill must also be treated with dignity. An elder lost his ability to speak, read, and write because of a mistake made during an operation. This was a severe blow, but his fellow elders decided to do whatever they could to prevent him from feeling useless. They now read all congregational correspondence to him and include him in the planning of other congregational matters. At elders’ meetings, they attempt to find out what his opinion is. They let him know that they still consider him to be a fellow elder and appreciate his presence. In the Christian congregation, all of us can make an effort so that no sick or elderly ones feel ‘thrown away’ or left out.​—Psalm 71:9.

Assistance to Gain Spiritual Strength

All of us need spiritual food to keep our faith alive and strong. That is why we are encouraged to read the Bible and Bible publications daily and to share zealously in Christian meetings and preaching activities. Often, sick and elderly ones need help to accomplish this, and it is important to do what is realistic in their particular case. Happily, many can still attend meetings if given transportation and a little assistance in the Kingdom Hall. Their attending such meetings is of great encouragement to the congregation. Their endurance is stimulating and faith strengthening.

In many cases sick and elderly ones can also have a meaningful share in the Christian ministry. Some can be included in a car group for witnessing, and they will no doubt feel refreshed by being able to make a few calls. When this is no longer possible, they can find joy in witnessing informally to individuals with whom they come in contact. A sister who was struck by cancer decided to spend whatever remained of her life in a special effort to advance the good news. Her bold preaching was an encouragement to all. She even planned her own funeral so that a fine witness would be given to unbelieving relatives, workmates, and neighbors. Her distressing circumstances thus “turned out for the advancement of the good news,” and her determination to express faith and confidence gave her final days special meaning.​—Philippians 1:12-14.

It is good to help sick and elderly ones to be spiritually strengthened. Families can invite them to share in a family evening, or part of their family study can occasionally be transferred to the home of one who cannot go out. One mother brought her two youngest children to the home of an older sister so that they could read My Book of Bible Stories together. This made the elderly sister happy, and the children enjoyed the attention she gave them.

There are times, however, when an infirm person should not be disturbed too much, and it may then be best just occasionally to read some material aloud to them. Remember, though, that if someone is physically too weak to share in a conversation, this one may still need and desire some spiritual association. We can pray with such ones, read to them, or relate experiences; but we should be careful not to stay longer than they can handle.

There is one sacred service that most sick and elderly ones can still perform: prayer in behalf of others. The early disciples attached great importance to this ministry. On one occasion they distributed the work load in the congregation in such a way that the apostles could concentrate on prayer. Faithful Epaphras is mentioned as ‘exerting himself in behalf of others in his prayers.’ (Colossians 4:12; Acts 6:4) Such prayer is most important and beneficial.​—Luke 2:36-38; James 5:16.

Jehovah remembers the sick and the elderly and looks after them in their time of calamity. He rightly expects that we too consider what we can do to help and support them. The concern we show reflects our determination to keep our own integrity. And we are happy to think of the words of King David: “Jehovah is aware of the days of the faultless ones, and their very inheritance will continue even to time indefinite.”​—Psalm 37:18.

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Giving Practical Help with Understanding

FRIENDS and relatives should acquire an elementary but correct knowledge of how to care for sick and elderly ones. Above all, they can be encouraged to keep a positive attitude toward life, to feel needed and appreciated, and to have a feeling of self-worth. Thus their quality of life will remain on a plane that will preserve their joy in Jehovah, despite their aches and pains. It has been noted that many of Jehovah’s Witnesses live to a ripe old age. A powerful contributing factor is no doubt their living interest in the hope ahead, their bright mental disposition, and their participation in Kingdom activity to the extent possible. The late president of the Watch Tower Society Frederick W. Franz, who died peacefully in his 100th year after a joyfully productive life, was a splendid example of this.​—Compare 1 Chronicles 29:28.

Generally, attention to the basic matters of daily care can mean much: good hygiene, proper nutrition, sufficient liquids and salt, reasonable exercise, fresh air, gentle massage, and stimulating conversation. Proper nutrition can contribute to better hearing, eyesight, mental function, and physical well-being, as well as to higher resistance to disease. To elderly people the simple matter of proper nutrition and plenty of liquids can mean the difference between a good condition and senility. It may require some thought to find a form of physical exercise that suits the individual. One sister who comes to read to an aged and almost blind sister begins and finishes each weekly visit with gently dancing around the room with the sister. The tape recorder is always ready with selected music, and both enjoy this “workout.”

In many countries, assistance organizations can provide valuable practical help and give information and advice as to specific conditions and how to cope with them. (Of course, a Christian should always take care not to be sidetracked into activities that distract from our true Christian ministry.) Sometimes aid is given in the form of the loan of a hospital bed, supports, braces, wheelchair, hearing aid, and so forth. Since many elderly ones feel that they do not need anything or that it does not pay to acquire such new things, relatives must often give sound advice or even use persuasion. A practical handle for the bathroom door can cause more real joy than a bouquet of flowers.

Caring for elderly ones can induce great mental stress, especially if the person becomes senile. Senility often approaches insidiously. One can try to counteract it by preventing the patient from being unnecessarily passive. A senile person can suddenly take offense at someone to whom he used to be strongly attached. Relatives must realize that an aging person can even forget everything that has to do with the truth​—a sad result of physical breakdown, not evidence of loss of faith.

If the patient is in a hospital or a nursing home, good contact with the personnel is necessary so that staff members know what to do in connection with birthdays, Christmas, or other worldly holidays. If an operation is necessary, relatives can explain and document the views the patient has held as to blood transfusion.