Young People Ask . . .
Why Do My Things Have to Be So Neat?
“This is the last time I’m going to tell you. Clean up your room!”
DOES this sound familiar to you? It may, since few of us have a natural tendency toward neatness.
Yet, such a demand may seem unfair to you. You may like your room a bit untidy. Besides, since there may be so many rules for the rest of the house, do there also have to be rules about the way you keep your room? You may even feel that because you do not drink or use drugs like other youths, one small fault like untidiness is no big deal. And isn’t it true that you have friends whose rooms are a lot worse? Why, then, do some parents make such a fuss about neatness? Do they have valid reasons for doing so?
Neatness Versus Untidiness
You may wish that your parents would follow the advice of one professor of psychiatry who said to parents: “Your best bet is to simply close the door to the offending room.” Others, though, recognize that parents do have good reasons for demanding tidiness. Psychiatrist Paul Adams is quoted in the Ladies’ Home Journal as saying: “It makes sense to tell a child that his room has to be somewhat tidy. Explain the restrictions. Say that if he can’t keep the bedroom minimally neat then you’re going to take away certain privileges.”
When you think about it, your parents do have the right to lay down rules even for your room, do they not? They spent much time and money so you could have your own room, and they probably furnished it. So they can reasonably set rules as to its care. You will find it advantageous to abide by them.
Henry W. Longfellow, in his poem The Builders, coined the saying, “Each thing in its place is best.” Evidently your parents feel that this is true, since there are advantages to having “each thing in its place.” What are some of them?
Some Advantages of Neatness
One obvious advantage is that it is easier to find things. An untidy person may waste a lot of time looking for keys, a comb, or a handkerchief, to say nothing about that other shoe that somehow got kicked under the bed. Also, clothes stay cleaner and keep their press, and so last longer when properly hung up. Too, there is no danger of tripping over slacks or shoes that are put away in their place. This is particularly important when you are sharing a room with a brother or a sister.
Above all, when each member of the family does his share, keeping his room neat and clean, it lessens the load for others and thus contributes to a happier family. In this regard 14-year-old Carolyn writes: “Mother has so much work to do here at home. . . . There are six kids besides me and none of them pick up after themselves very well and my mom has to and she has a bad back.” If those seven children kept “each thing in its place,” it would surely lessen their mother’s load, would it not?
Another advantage is that if you keep your own room neat, you will probably do the same in other areas as well. This habit of neatness will also show up in the way you care for the family car and other property and will probably persist even into adulthood. Some day when you have to work secularly, a reputation for neatness may even enhance your possibilities of advancement—a worthwhile prospect, don’t you think?
That it is practical to abide by your parents’ rules is also borne out by the following: Most youths are anxious to drive a car. But when should they start? Not necessarily when they meet the legal age requirement. Drs. J. E. Schowalter and W. R. Anyan, Jr., state in The Family Handbook of Adolescence: “When the teenager can be trusted to follow rules and is generally reliable, it is likely that these same traits will control his or her behavior while driving.” (Italics ours.) Do you not feel, then, that it is worth while to train yourself to be reliable and trustworthy and to follow rules even in the care of your room? The Bible says that it is: “The person faithful in what is least is faithful also in much.”—Luke 16:10.
For the Christian youth, however, the main reason for being neat and tidy was given by the apostle Paul, who wrote: “God is a God, not of disorder, but of peace.” He also wrote: “Become imitators of God, as beloved children.”—1 Corinthians 14:33; Ephesians 5:1.
This orderliness on God’s part was evident in the arrangement he made in the tabernacle, or tent, of worship of the nation of Israel. Only members of priestly families (Levites) were permitted inside the tabernacle. Moreover, Jehovah had Moses write down exactly where each item in the tabernacle was to be placed, and He gave detailed instructions as to what the priests and Levites were to do with them. (Exodus 40) In this way, non-Levite Israelites could at least visualize all that was being done in the tabernacle in connection with their worship of Jehovah. This would certainly make them feel a part of the proceedings and give them a sense of belonging. Do you not think that they must have been very grateful that Jehovah was a God of order?
What to Do About That Room?
How, then, can you create some order in your room? As mentioned previously, your parents may already have some specific demands. But there is much you can do on your own initiative. Start with the obvious: Hang up any clothes lying around. Clothes hangers will keep shirts, blouses, and dresses neat. A shoe rack (or plastic shoe bag) will do wonders in keeping shoes in their place, improving the looks of the clothes closet. What about dirty clothes? Instead of just throwing them in a corner, why not have a hamper or at least a bag just for that purpose? Then, the bed. A few minutes a day makes the difference between a messy-looking bed and a neat one. Why not opt for a neat one?
Now for the things that are not so obvious. Choose one drawer in the room at a time and work on it, throwing away any useless items and putting the others in place. You may want to put in the drawer some small cardboard boxes or transparent plastic bags, using one for your underwear, another for socks or stockings, and so on. In a short time your room will have an entirely different look, and you will be developing a sense of pride in it.
Youths—Look to Your Future
Is it worth so much time and effort to learn to be neat? Carol, now in her 20’s, recalls the struggle she had. If her mother found Carol’s room not up to standard (for example, if the socks and underwear were not neatly folded in the drawer), she would simply empty the drawers on the floor and have Carol put everything back neatly. Or, as punishment, Carol might be grounded for the weekend.
Looking back, does Carol feel that her mother was unfair? “No, I learned a lot from it. Now I know how to iron my clothes and how to keep things neat and clean. Maybe not up to Mother’s standards, but at least I can leave my bedroom door open.”
If Carol has children of her own in the future, what will she teach them about neatness? She explained: “I don’t think I’ll check their drawers, but if their room looks tidy, it’ll be OK.” When asked what counsel she had for youths, Carol answered: “Abide by your parents’ standard of neatness. You’ll eventually make it a habit.”
It has been said that man is a creature of habits. Some of these habits are beneficial, some are not. Hence, Elbert Hubbard wisely wrote: “Cultivate only the habits that you are willing should master you.”
Which habit do you want to master you—that of neatness or that of untidiness? As you ponder this, bear in mind the advantages of the habit of neatness: It has a Scriptural basis, saves time and money, builds self-respect, builds respect in others for you. And last but not least is the thought expressed by young Carolyn: “My mom really needs my help, and she appreciates it so much when I help her.”
[Pictures on page 24, 25]
Which do you prefer: this . . . or this?