The Bible Can Help Your Marriage

MARRIAGE​—for some, the word evokes pleasant thoughts. For others, it elicits heartache. “I feel emotionally divorced,” laments one wife. “I feel neglected and lonely all the time.”

What causes two people who once vowed to love and cherish each other to become so distant? One factor is a lack of education about what marriage entails. “We enter the institution without any training whatsoever,” observes one medical journalist.

That few today possess such know-how is borne out by a study conducted by The National Marriage Project, a research initiative of Rutgers University in New Jersey, U.S.A. “Many in this study have grown up with unhappily married or divorced parents,” write the directors of the project. “They know exactly what a bad marriage is, but they are less sure of what a good marriage looks like. Some can only describe a good marriage as ‘the opposite of my parents.’”

Are Christians immune to marital problems? No. In fact, some Christians in the first century needed pointed counsel to “stop seeking a release” from their marriage. (1 Corinthians 7:27) Clearly, any marriage of two imperfect humans is going to have its problems, but we have help. Husbands and wives can improve their relationship by applying Bible principles.

True, the Bible is not a marriage manual. Since it is inspired by the One who originated the marital arrangement, however, we can expect its principles to be helpful. Through the prophet Isaiah, Jehovah God stated: “I, Jehovah, am your God, the One teaching you to benefit yourself, the One causing you to tread in the way in which you should walk. O if only you would actually pay attention to my commandments! Then your peace would become just like a river, and your righteousness like the waves of the sea.”​—Isaiah 48:17, 18.

Has the love that once existed between you and your mate begun to fade? Do you feel trapped in a loveless marriage? One wife of 26 years said: “The pain that is experienced with this kind of relationship can hardly be described. It is constant and all-permeating.” Rather than resign yourself to an unfulfilling marriage, why not resolve to do something about it? The following article will show husbands and wives how Bible principles can help their marriage in one specific area​—that of commitment.

How to Strengthen Your Marriage

IMAGINE a house that has fallen into a state of disrepair. The paint is peeling, the roof is damaged, and even the lawn lies untended. Obviously, this building has weathered some severe storms over the years, and it has suffered from neglect. Should it be demolished? Not necessarily. If the foundation is strong and the structure is stable, the house can likely be restored.

Does the condition of that house remind you of your marriage? Over the years, severe storms, so to speak, may have taken a toll on your marital relationship. A degree of neglect may be involved on the part of one or both of you. You may feel as did Sandy. After 15 years of wedlock, she stated: “We had nothing in common but being married to each other. And that wasn’t enough.”

Even if your marriage has reached this point, do not hastily conclude that it should be terminated. Likely, your marriage can be restored. Much depends on the level of commitment that exists between you and your mate. Commitment can help to give a marriage stability in times of trial. But what is commitment? And how can the Bible help you to strengthen it?

Commitment Involves Obligation

According to one dictionary, commitment refers to “the state of being obligated or emotionally impelled.” At times, the word is applied to something impersonal, such as a business agreement. For example, a builder might feel obliged to fulfill the demands of a contract he has signed to construct a house. He may not personally know the one who commissioned the work. Still, he feels compelled to live up to his word.

Although marriage is not a cold business deal, the commitment involved includes obligation. You and your mate likely have solemnly vowed before God and man to stay together, come what may. Jesus stated: “He who created [man and woman] from the beginning made them male and female and