Xa Umntwana Ekunandipha Ukukhula

UKUKHULA komntwana ngendlela efanelekileyo kuxhomekeke kakhulu kubazali bakhe. Kodwa yintoni ebandakanyekileyo ekukhuliseni umntwana kakuhle? Mhlawumbi ukhe wawafumana amacebiso ngokuphathelele lo mbandela. Chitha ixesha nabantwana bakho. Baphulaphule. Banike ulwalathiso olucacileyo. Bonakalisa uvelwano kubo, ncokola nabo ngezinto ezibavuyisayo nezibakhathazayo. Yiba ngumhlobo wokwenene wabo kwangaxeshanye ulisebenzise igunya onalo njengomzali. Kakade ke, la macebiso aqhelekileyo aya kubanceda abazali bawenze kakuhle umsebenzi wabo. Kodwa kukho nto isisiseko neyeyona ibalulekileyo.

Ehlabathini lonke, izigidi zabazali ziye zafumanisa ukuba ukulandela imigaqo yeBhayibhile xa zikhulisa abantwana ngoyena ndoqo. Ngoba? Ngenxa yokuba uMbhali weBhayibhile onobulumko, uYehova uThixo, nguye owasungula ilungiselelo lentsapho. (Genesis 1:27, 28; 2:18-24; Efese 3:15) Ngoko ke, iLizwi lakhe eliphefumlelweyo ngowona mthombo ufanelekileyo wolwalathiso lokukhulisa abantwana. Noko ke, incwadi endala njengeBhayibhile inokulunikela njani ulwalathiso ngokuphathelele utyekelo olukhoyo namhlanje lokunyanzela abantwana ukuba bakhule ngokukhawuleza? Makhe sihlole eminye imigaqo yeZibhalo ephathelele oku.

‘Ngokwesantya Sabantwana’

UYakobi, unyana kaIsake, wayenabantwana abangaphezu kweshumi elinesibini. IBhayibhile ithetha ngamazwi anengqondo awawathethayo xa intsapho yakhe yayithabatha uhambo. “Abantwana babuthathaka . . . Mayincede ke ngoko, inkosi yam [uEsawu, umkhuluwa kaYakobi], idlulele ngaphambi komkhonzi wayo, kodwa mna ndothi chu kuhle nohambo ngokwesantya . . . sabantwana.”—Genesis 33:13, 14.

UYakobi wayesazi ukuba abantwana bakhe babengenakwenza izinto ngokufana nabantu abadala. ‘Babebuthathaka’—bebancinane, be-ethe-ethe yaye babeneentswelo ezininzi kunabantu abadala. Kunokuba anyanzele abantwana bakhe ukuba bakhawuleze, wehlisa isantya salingana nesabo. Kule nkalo, wabonakalisa ubulumko obubonakaliswa nguThixo kubantwana bakhe abangabantu. UBawo wethu uyazazi iintsilelo zethu. Akalindelanga ukuba senze izinto ezingaphaya kwamandla ethu.—INdumiso 103:13, 14.

Kwanezinye izilwanyana azidalileyo zibonakalisa ubulumko obunjalo, kuba uThixo wazenza ‘zalumka ngethuku lemvelo.’ (IMizekeliso 30:24) Ngokomzekelo, izazi ngezemvelo zithi umhlambi weendlovu uhamba ngesantya sethole lendlovu eliphakathi kwawo, uthi chu de elo thole likwazi ukuhamba ngesantya esifanelekileyo.

Abanye abantu namhlanje baye babutyeshela ubulumko bukaThixo. Kodwa akuyomfuneko ukuba wenze okufanayo. Khumbula ukuba umntwana wakho ‘ubuthathaka’—akakwazi ukusingatha iimbopheleleko zabantu abadala. Ukuba ngokomzekelo, ungumzali ongenaqabane yaye unengxaki kwaye unomnqweno wokuyixelela umntwana wakho, wuxhathise loo mnqweno. Kunoko, funa umhlobo omdala oqolileyo onokukunceda ukwazi ukulungisa le ngxaki—ngokukodwa umntu oya kukunceda usebenzise isiluleko sobulumko esivela eBhayibhileni.—IMizekeliso 17:17.

Ngokufanayo, musa ukwenza umntwana wakho ahambe ngesantya esiphezulu, umthwalise iimbopheleleko ezinzima ade angalinandiphi ixesha lobutsha bakhe. Mbekele isantya esifanelekileyo umntwana wakho, kungekhona isantya esilingana nesehlabathi lanamhlanje. IBhayibhile inikela eli cebiso lobulumko: “Ungavumeli ihlabathi elikungqongileyo likwenze ufane nalo.”—Roma 12:2, IPhillips.

“Yonke Into Inexesha Layo Elimisiweyo”

Omnye umgaqo wobulumko ofumaneka eBhayibhileni uthi: “Yonke into inexesha layo elimisiweyo, nomcimbi wonke unexesha lawo phantsi kwamazulu.” Kakade ke, kukho ixesha lokusebenza. Abantwana banomsebenzi omninzi abamele bawenze—kuquka umsebenzi wesikolo, imisebenzi eyenziwa ekhaya, nemisebenzi ephathelele izinto zokomoya. Noko ke, kwale ndinyana inye yeBhayibhile ithi kukho “nexesha lokuhleka” “nexesha lokudloba.”—INtshumayeli 3:1, 4.

Abantwana bafuna ukudlala, ukuhleka nokukhupha onke amandla abanawo obutsha bekhululekile. Ukuba ngalo lonke ixesha bafanele benze umsebenzi wesikolo, babandakanyeke kwimidlalo edlalwa ukuphuma kwesikolo basingathe nezinye iimbopheleleko ezinzulu, abanakulifumana ixesha lokwanelisa umnqweno abanawo wokufuna ukudlala. Ngenxa yoko, loo nto inokubacaphukisa, yaye inokubenza badakumbe.—Kolose 3:21.

Phawula ezinye iindlela onokuwusebenzisa ngazo lo mgaqo weBhayibhile. Ngokomzekelo, ekubeni yonke into inexesha layo, ngaba oko akuthethi ukuba umntwana ufanele alinandiphe ixesha lobuntwana bakhe? Mhlawumbi usenokuphendula uthi ewe, kodwa abantwana bakho basenokungavumelani nawe ngalo lonke ixesha. Amaxesha amaninzi, amakhwenkwe namantombazana aselula afuna ukwenza izinto abona zisenziwa ngabantu abadala. Ngokomzekelo, amantombazana aselula asenokufuna ukunxiba aze azilungise ngokungathi ngamabhinqa amadala. Xa eqala ukufikisa asenokufuna ukubonakala njengabantu abadala.

Abazali abalumkileyo bayabubona ubungozi baloo nto. Ezinye izibhengezo zentengiso neenkqubo zokuzonwabisa zeli hlabathi linemilinganiselo ephantsi zenza abantwana babonakale ngokungathi ngabantu abaqolileyo. Iya ixhaphaka ngakumbi into yokubona abantwana abasebenzisa izithambiso zobuso, ubumenye-menye bezacholo nempahla evuselel’ isini. Kutheni ufuna abantwana babe nomtsalane kubantu abangcolileyo abafuna ukubaxhaphaza ngokwesini? Ngokunceda abantwana banxibe ngendlela efanele abantwana abalingana nabo, abazali basebenzisa umgaqo weBhayibhile othi: “Onobuqili uyayibona intlekele azifihle.”—IMizekeliso 27:12.

Nanku omnye umzekelo: Ukuvumela umntwana agqale ezemidlalo njengeyona nto ibalulekileyo ebomini bakhe kunokumbangela ukuba aphile ubomi obungalungelelananga, yaye xa kunjalo umgaqo othi yonk’ into inexesha layo awusebenzi. Kodwa iBhayibhile inikela eli cebiso lobulumko: “Ingqeqesho yomzimba iyingenelo kancinane; kodwa lona uzinikelo lobuthixo luyingenelo kuzo zonke izinto, njengoko lusinika ithemba kobu bomi nakobo buzayo.”—1 Timoti 4:8.

Musa ukuvumela umntwana abe nesimo sengqondo sokuba umele “aphumelele nokuba sekumnyam’ entla.” Abazali abaninzi babangela ukuba abantwana babo bangazinandiphi ezemidlalo ngokubaphembelela ukuba babe nomoya wokhuphiswano, bafune baphumelele nokuba sekumnyam’ entla. Ngenxa yoko, abanye abantwana bayanyanzeleka ukuba benze amaqhinga okanye benzakalise abanye abadlali ukuze baphumelele emdlalweni. Ngokuqinisekileyo, akuyomfuneko ukuba umntu ade azifake kwiingozi ezinjalo ukuze aphumelele emdlalweni!

Ukufunda Ukuzeyisa

Kudla ngokuba nzima ngabantwana ukuzifundisa ukuba yonke into inexesha layo. Akulula kubo ukulinda ngomonde xa befuna okuthile. Eyona nto yenza izinto zibe nzima nangakumbi kukuba abantu banotyekelo lokufuna izinto ngokungxama. Amajelo ezolonwabo adla ngokuthi, “Fumana nantoni na oyifunayo ngoku!”

Musa ukuphenjelelwa lolo tyekelo ngokufekethisa abantwana bakho. Incwadi ethi The Child and the Machine, ithi: “Ukukwazi ukulinda ngaphambi kokuba ufumane okuthile yeyona nto ibalulekileyo nebonisa ubukrelekrele bengqondo. Ukuzeyisa nokubakho kwemvisiswano phakathi kwabantu kuyaluthothisa ugonyamelo olukhoyo phakathi kwabantwana xa besesikolweni naxa bengekho sikolweni.” EBhayibhileni kukho lo mgaqo uluncedo: “Ukuba ubani umtefisa kwasebutsheni umkhonzi wakhe, kamva ekuphileni kwakhe uya kuba ngongenambulelo.” (IMizekeliso 29:21) Nangona le ndinyana ibhekisela kwindlela yokuphatha izicaka eziselula, abazali abaninzi bafumanise ukuba lo mgaqo uyingenelo kakhulu nasebantwaneni.

Phakathi kwezinto ekufuneka abantwana bazifumane, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba bafumane oko iBhayibhile ikubiza ngokuthi ‘yingqeqesho nokweyiselwa kwengqondo kuYehova.’ (Efese 6:4) Ukuqeqesha abantwana ngokunothando kubanceda bahlakulele iimpawu ezifana nokuzeyisa nomonde. Ezi mpawu ziya kubanceda bafumane ulonwabo nolwaneliseko ubomi babo bonke.

Xa Zonke Izinto Ezingcungcuthekisa Abantwana Ziya Kube Zingasekho

Noko ke, usenokuzibuza, ‘Ngaba uThixo osisilumko nonothando owaphefumlela yonke le migaqo iluncedo wayenenjongo yokuba ihlabathi esiphila kulo libe nje? Ngaba wayenenjongo yokuba abantwana bakhulele kwihlabathi eliyingozi nekungekho mnandi ukuhlala kuyo?’ Kunokukuthuthuzela kakhulu ukwazi ukuba uYehova uThixo noNyana wakhe, uKristu Yesu banothando ngoluntu nangabo bonke abantwana. Kungekudala baya kuphelisa bonke ubungendawo emhlabeni.—INdumiso 37:10, 11.

Ngaba ungathanda ukwazi ukuba kuya kuba njani ukuphila ngelo xesha loxolo nolonwabo? Khawube nomfanekiso-ngqondweni woku kuchazwa eBhayibhileni: “Ingcuka iya kuhlala ithutyana nenkunzi yemvana, ihlosi libuthe netakane, kubuthe ndawonye ithole lenkomo nengonyama entsha enesingci, nesilwanyana esondlekileyo; nenkwenkwana iziqhube ezo zinto.” (Isaya 11:6) Kweli hlabathi abantwana badla ngokuphathwa ngenkohlakalo xa bekhula okanye banyanzelwe ukuba bakhule ngokukhawuleza, hayi indlela ekuthuthuzela ngayo ukwazi ukuba uThixo uthembisa ikamva eliqaqambileyo kulo mhlaba! Ngokucacileyo, uMdali akananjongo yokuba abantwana baphulukane nelungelo labo lokukhula ngokufanelekileyo—kodwa ufuna bonwabe yaye baneliseke.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 18]

Kunokuba uthwalise umntwana wakho iingxaki zakho, zityand’ igila komnye umntu omdala

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 18, 19]

Abantwana kufuneka badlale