Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .
Kutheni Kukho Imithetho Emininzi Kangaka?
“Akukho nto eyayindikruqula njengexesha endandimele ndigoduke ngalo! Ndandisuka ndinxube xa ndibona abanye besonwabile de kube sebusuku kunokuba mna ndandivumelekile.”—UAllen.
“Akukho nto indicaphukisa njengale yokuba wonk’ umntu kufuneka azi ukuba ndifowunelwa ngubani kwicellphone yam. Loo nto indenza ndizive ingathi ndilusana!”—UElizabeth.
NGABA uvakalelwa ukuba kukho imithetho emininzi kowenu? Ngaba wakha wafuna ukuzimela uye kuzonwabisa okanye uxoke kubazali bakho ngezinto ozenzayo? Ukuba kunjalo kusenokwenzeka ukuba uvakalelwa ngendlela omnye oselula awabachaza ngayo abazali bakhe, uthi bazama ukumkhusela kwinto yonke, ulebela ngelithi: ‘Ngas’ ke bandinike nje ithuba lokuzonwaya!’
Imithetho yasekhaya, zizinto oxelelwa ngumzali wakho okanye umntu okunyamekelayo ukuba uzenze okanye ungazenzi. Le mithetho inokuquka umsebenzi wakho wesikolo owenziwa ekhaya, imisetyenzana yasekhaya, ixesha omele ube sekhaya ngalo, kunye neminye efana nendlela omele uyisebenzisa ngayo icellphone yakho, umabonwakude okanye ikhompyutha. Kodwa le mithetho isenokuquka izinto ezingaphaya kwekhaya njengendlela oziphatha ngayo esikolweni nabahlobo obakhethayo.
Ngamaxesha amaninzi ulutsha oluninzi kulula ukuba lwaphule imithetho yabazali balo. Kolunye uhlolisiso, phantse abakwishumi elivisayo ababini kwabathathu baye bohlwaywa ngabazali babo ngenxa yokwaphula imithetho yasekhaya yaye ngokuqhelekileyo oku kusesona sizathu esenza bohlwaywe.
Noko ke, inkoliso yabaselula iyaqonda ukuba imithetho iyafuneka ukuze kubekho ucwangco ekhaya. Kodwa ukuba imithetho yasekhaya imele ibekho, kutheni ikruqula kangaka nje? Yaye ukuba uziva ubophelelekile kwimithetho yabazali bakho, unokukhululeka njani?
“Andiselulo Usana”!
UEmily, okwishumi elivisayo ubuza athi: “Ndinokubabonisa njani abazali bam ukuba andiselulo usana yaye kufuneka bandiyeke ndikhule?” Ngaba wakha wavakalelwa ngaloo ndlela? NjengoEmily, isenokukukruqula imithetho kuba ubona ngathi uphathwa njengosana. Kakade ke, abazali bakho bazibona ngeny’ indlela izinto. Mhlawumbi bavakalelwa kukuba imithetho yabo ibalulekile ukuze ikukhusele yaye iya kukwenza ube ngumntu onengqondo ezinzileyo wakuba mdala.
Nokuba kuvela umnyinyiva, kusenokwenzeka ucinga ukuba oko akuhambisani neminyaka yakho. Oku kusenokuba buhlungu ngakumbi ukuba abantwana bakowenu bafumana inkululeko kunawe. Omnye oselula, uMarcy, uthi: “Ndineminyaka eli-17 ubudala, ndinyanzelwa ngabazali bam ukuba ndibuye kuselithuba. Ndiyohlwaywa ukuba ndenza nantoni na ephosakeleyo, kodwa xa umntakwethu wayeneminyaka elingana neyam, wayefika ngexesha athanda ngalo yaye andikhumbuli esohlwaywa.” Ebalisa ngeminyaka yakhe yobutsha uMatthew uthi, “Oodade wethu babengohlwaywa kwanaxa benze into ekucacileyo ukuba ayifanelekanga!”
Ngaba Kunokuba Bhetele Xa Imithetho Ingekho?
Kusenokwenzeka ukuba ulangazelela ukuba ngeny’ imini uphume phantsi kwegunya labazali. Kodwa ngaba ngokwenene bekuya kuba bhetele ukuba bekunokuba njalo? Mhlawumbi wazi abanye abasebatsha abahamba de kube sezinzulwini zobusuku, abanxiba unothanda okanye bahambe nabahlobo babo besiya kwantliziyo-ndise. Kunokwenzeka ukuba abazali babo baxakeke gqitha ukuba bangakuphawula oko kwenziwa ngabantwana babo. Nokuba siyintoni isizathu, le ndlela yokukhulisa abantwana ayiphumeleli. (IMizekeliso 29:15) Ubona nje ihlabathi lingenaluthando kungenxa yabantu abazingcayo, abangazange banqwanqwadwe besakhula.—2 Timoti 3:1-5.
Ngeny’ imini uya kuba nesinye isimo sengqondo ngemithetho yasekhaya. Khawucinge ngolunye uhlolisiso olwenziwa kwamanye amabhinqa akhule ngaphandle kwemithetho nangaphandle kweliso labazali. Xa ekhangela emva, akukho namnye kuwo ocinga ukuba kukho into ebhetele ngokungabi nayo imithetho yasekhaya. Kunoko, bacinga ukuba abazali babo babengakhathali yaye babengakwazi ukubakhulisa.
Kunokuba ulumonele ulutsha olwenza unothanda, imithetho yabazali bakho yijonge njengendlela ababonisa ngayo ukuba bayakuthanda nokuba bakukhathalele. Ngokuba nemida esengqiqweni baxelisa uYehova uThixo othi kubantu bakhe: “Ndiya kukuqiqisa ndikuyalele ngendlela ofanele uhambe ngayo. Ndiya kukucebisa iliso lam likuwe.”—INdumiso 32:8.
Okwangoku, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ucinga imithetho yabazali bakho ingqongqo. Ukuba kunjalo, hlolisisa izinto onokuzenza ukuze ubomi kowenu bonwabise nangakumbi.
Indlela Ephumelelayo Yokuncokola
Enoba ufuna inkululeko okanye umnyinyiva ongakumbi, ukuze ukufumane oko kufuneka uthethe nabazali bakho. Omnye usenokuthi, ‘Kodwa ndithethile nabazali bam kodwa ingathi izinto zisafana!’ Ukuba le yindlela ovakalelwa ngayo umele uzibuze oku, ‘Ngaba ndinoyikuphucula indlela endithetha ngayo?’ Ukuthetha nabazali bakho kunokukunceda (1) ekufumaneni oko ukufunayo (2) ukuqonda isizathu sokuba ungenako ukufumana yonke into oyifunayo. Kaloku ukuba ufuna inkululeko yokwenza izinto zabantu abadala, kusengqiqweni ukulindela ukuba uthethe njengomntu omdala.
◼ Funda ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho. IBhayibhile ithi: “Isiyatha sikhupha wonke umoya waso, kodwa isilumko siwugcina uzolile kude kuse ekupheleni.” (IMizekeliso 29:11) Ukuncokola kakuhle akuthethi ukuba ukhalaza ngalo lonk’ ixesha. Oku kunokwenza abazali bakho bakungxolise. Ngaloo ndlela kuphephe ukukhalaza, ukuqumba nokuba nomsindo ngokungathi ungumntwana. Nokuba uvakalelwa ngathi ufuna ukumbakraza amacango okanye unyuka usihla unomsindo xa abazali bakho bekubekela imiqathango, isimilo esinjalo sinokongezelela eminye imithetho—kungekhona umnyinyiva.
◼ Zama ukuba nembono yabazali bakho. UTracy, ngumKristu oselula yaye uhlala nonina kuphela, uye wakufumanisa kuluncedo oku. Uthi: “Ndizibuza ukuba ‘Yintoni umama afuna ukuyiphumeza ngemithetho yakhe?’ Uzama ukuphucula ubuntu bam.” (IMizekeliso 3:1, 2) Ukuqonda abazali bakho ngale ndlela kunokukwenza ukwazi ukuchaza indlela ovakalelwa ngayo. Ngokomzekelo, masithi abakuvumeli ukuba uye kwimbutho ethile. Kunokuba uphendulane nabo, usenokubuza, ‘“Ukuba kuza kubakho omnye umntu oqolileyo nothembekileyo oza kuhamba nam, ndingaya?’” Musa ukulindela abazali ukuba bavume ngalo lonk’ ixesha; kodwa ukuba uyakuqonda oko kubenza baxhalabe, unamathuba amahle okuba samkelwe isicelo sakho.
◼ Yenza abazali bakho bakuthembe. Ukuthenjwa ngabazali bakho kufana nokubeka imali ebhankini. Uvumelekile ukuba utsale imali kwiakhawunti yakho kuphela. Ukuba utsala imali engaphezu kwaleyo unayo kwiakhawunti yakho, uza kuhlawula imali engakumbi yaye ekugqibeleni isenokuvalwa iakhawunti yakho. Ukufumana amalungelo awongezelelekileyo kufana nokutsala imali ebhankini; kuya kuphumelela kuphela ukuba uzenzele igama elihle.
◼ Yiba nolindelo olusengqiqweni. Abazali babophelelekile ngoko ukwenzayo. Ngoko ke, iBhayibhile ithetha “ngomyalelo kayihlo” “nomthetho kanyoko.” (IMizekeliso 6:20) Phofu akufanele ucinge ukuba imithetho yakowenu yenzelwe ukugxobha ubomi bakho. Kunoko, ukuba uthobela igunya labazali bakho, uYehova uthembisa ukuba kungekudala kuza “kulunga kuwe”!—Efese 6:1-3.
Amanye amanqaku athi “Imibuzo Yabantu Abaselula . . . ” anokufumaneka kwiWeb site ethi www.watchtower.org/ype
OFANELE UCINGE NGAKO
◼ Yiyiphi imithetho ocinga ukuba kunzima ukuyithobela?
◼ Yintoni oyifunde kweli nqaku ocinga ukuba iza kukunceda ekuthobeleni imithetho yabazali bakho?
◼ Unokubenza njani abazali bakho bakuthembe?
[Ibhokisi/Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 11]
Xa Kophulwe Umthetho
Kusenokwenzeka ukuba yinto oyiqhelileyo le: Ufike emva kwexesha elibekiweyo, kukho umsebenzi wasekhaya ongawenzanga okanye usebenzise ifowuni ngokugqithiseleyo. Abazali bakho bemi phambi kwakho! Unokuyenza njani le ngxaki ukuba ingabi saya phambili?
◼ Thetha inyaniso. Musa ukucinga amaqhinga okuzikhupha kule nyula; nyaniseka uze uchaze yonke into. (IMizekeliso 28:13) Ukugqwetha izinto kunokwenza abazali bakho bangakuthembi. Musa ukuzithabatha lula izinto okanye ufune ukuzithethelela. Ungalibali “impendulo, xa inobulali, isusa umsindo.”—IMizekeliso 15:1.
◼ Cela uxolo. Ukucel’ uxolo ngenxa yokuxhalaba kwabo, ukuphoxeka okanye umsebenzi owongezelelekileyo ngenxa yoko ukwenzileyo, oko kunokunciphisa isohlwayo. (1 Samuweli 25:24) Kodwa ke, kufuneka uzisole ngokwenene.
◼ Yamkele imiphumo. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba ungasithandi isohlwayo, ingakumbi ukuba kubonakala ngathi udlelw’ indlala. (IMizekeliso 20:3) Kodwa ukuvuma isono sakho kuthetha ukuba uqolile. (Galati 6:7) Eyona nto ibhetele unokuyenza kukwenza abazali bakho baphinde bakuthembe.
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 12]
Zama ukuqonda isizathu sokuba abazali bakho baxhalabe