Ukunceda Ulutsha Lujamelane Nemiqobo

INDLELA yokuphila yeli hlabathi nefashoni yalo itshintsha umhla nezolo. Ubukhulu becala, ngenxa yobugcisa bala maxesha, olu tshintsho luphawuleka nangakumbi namhlanje. Ifashoni yayizolo sele iyint’ endala namhlanje yaye okuthandwayo namhlanje kulizothe ngomso. Olu tshintsho luchaphazela ulutsha ngendlela engathethekiyo.

Izinto Zitshintshile

Kwiminyaka yakutshanje, ubugcisa buye bavelisa utshintsho oluchaphazela ulutsha ngeyona ndlela. Ngokomzekelo, icellphone nekhompyutha sele ziyinxalenye yobomi bomntu oselula. Ukwenza abahlobo kwi-Internet kuye kwavelisa amathuba amatsha. Enye intombazana eneminyaka eli-19 ubudala yaseOstreliya, ithi: “Usenokungabi namhlobo kubomi bemihla ngemihla uze ngesiquphe ube nabahlobo abaninzi kwi-Internet.”

Bambalwa abantu abangakwaziyo ukubaluleka kwecell phone neInternet. Noko ke, abanye abantu bangamakhoboka ezi zinto. UNjingalwazi weYunivesithi uDonald Roberts, uthi bambi abafundi “abakwazi ukusuka kwiklasi eqala ngentsimbi yeshumi baye kwiklasi eqala ngentsimbi yeshumi elinanye bengakhange bathethe kwiicellphone zabo.” Uthi: “Ndibona ngathi baba nesithukuthezi xa kuthe cwaka bengathethi namntu, ngokungathi bathi ‘Makungathi cwaka kangaka.’”

Olunye ulutsha luyavuma ukuba lungamakhoboka ezi zinto. UStephanie oneminyaka eli-16 ubudala uthi: “Andikwazi ukungabhaleli mntu kwicellphone yam, kuphela kwendlela endincokola ngayo nabahlobo bam. Ndifika nje ekhaya, ndingena kwi-Internet ndize ndihlale apho . . . ngamanye amaxesha de kubethe intsimbi yesithathu ekuseni.” UStephanie udla ngokuhlawula malunga nama-R760 ukusa kuma-R3 800. Uthi: “Ndityala abazali bam imali emalunga ne-$2,000 [R15 000] imali engaphezu kwaleyo ebendimele ndibe ndiyayisebenzisa ngenyanga efowunini. Kodwa sendikuqhelile ukuba necellphone, kangangokuba andikwazi ukuphila ngaphandle kwayo.”

Iingxaki zisenokuba asiyomali kuphela. Xa wayesenza uhlolisiso ngobomi beentsapho, ingcali ngentlalo, uElinor Ochs, wafumanisa ukuba, xa umzali osebenzayo efika ekhaya, iqabane lakhe nabantwana banikela ingqalelo kwezinye izinto kangangokuba kumathuba amabini kwamathathu loo mzali akafumani nomolo lo! Wonk’ umntu uxakeke zizinto zakhe ze-elektroniki. UOchs, uthi: “Siyibonile indlela ekunzima ngayo ngabazali ukuqonda izinto ezithandwa ngabantwana babo.” Le nzwakazi yalek’ umsundulu ngelithi, olu hlolisiso luye lwabonisa ukuba abazali bacezela kude kwizinto ezibangel’ umdla ebantwaneni babo.

Ubuhlobo Kwi-Internet—Ngaba Buyingozi?

Abazali abaninzi nootitshala baxhalatyiswa lixesha abantwana abalichitha kwi-Internet. Kukho indlela yokuba bazenzele ezabo iiWeb site, bafake iifoto zabo, imifanekiso erekhodwe ngevidiyo baze babhale izinto ezenzeka ebomini babo, ezo Web site kuthiwa ziiblog.

Enye into etsala ingqalelo yabantu abaninzi kwezi Web site kukukwazi ukuqhagamshelana nabahlobo babo. Eny’ into, xa umntu oselula ekwazi ukuba neWeb site yakhe uyakwazi ukuchaza “izimvo zakhe.” Iyaqondakala into eyenza abantu abaselula bathi phithi thwanga zezi Web site, kaloku, ukufikisa lixesha lokuba umntu azazi aze achaze iimvakalelo zakhe ngendlela eya kuchukumisa abanye.

Noko ke, kukho nenye ingxaki, abanye benza iiWeb site bechaza into abafuna ukuba yiyo kunoko bakuko ngokwenene. Enye inkwenkwana eneminyaka eli-15 ubudala ithi: “Kukho omnye umntwana esikolweni othi uneminyaka engama-21 ubudala yaye uhlala eLas Vegas.” Bobabini aba bantwana bahlala malunga neekhilomitha ezili-1 600 ukusuka kweso sixeko saseUnited States.

Oku kudukis’ umkhondo kuqhelekile. Enye intombazana yaseOstreliya ithi: “Kwi-Internet ungenza nokuba yintoni. Ungazenza omnye umntu kuba kakade akukho mntu ukwazi ngokwenene. Uyazithemba. Usenokuthetha izinto ezingekhoyo ukuze nje abanye babe nomdla kuwe. Unokufaka imifanekiso yakho unxibe okanye usenza izinto ongenakuze uzenze ebomini bakho. Ubhala izinto ongenakuze uzithethe ubuso nobuso nomntu. Uvakalelwa kukuba unokwenza nantoni na ngenxa yokuba akwaziwa. Akukho namnye okwaziyo ukuba ungubani.”

Njengayo nayiphi na indlela yokuncokola, ukusebenzisa i-Internet kunokuba luncedo kodwa kwangaxeshanye usenokulutheza olunenkume. Njengomzali, ngaba uyakwazi okwenziwa ngabantwana bakho xa bekwi-Internet? Ngaba uqinisekile ukuba abantwana bakho basebenzisa ixesha labo ngobulumko?a (Efese 5:15, 16) Ukongezelela, ukuyisebenzisa kakubi i-Internet kunokubeka oselula kwiingozi ezininzi. Ziziphi ezinye zezo ngozi?

Izinto Ezimbi Kwi-Internet

Abantu abasebenzisa i-Internet abaziwa, ngaloo ndlela kulula ukuba baxhaphaze abantwana. Ulutsha lusenokubanjiswa ngulo mgibe lungaqondanga ukuba ludlulisela inkcazelo yobuqu kwi-Internet okanye xa luvuma ukudibana nomntu oluncokola nalo kwi-Internet. Incwadi ethi Parenting 911 ithi, abanye abantu beme ngelithi “abantwana basemngciphekweni wobundlobongela nokuxhatshazwa emakhayeni abo okanye kwiindawo abadlala kuzo. Kodwa kukho enye into engaqondakaliyo kwabanye abazali yokuba abantwana babo banokufunyanwa lula ngabaxhaphazi babantwana kwiikhompyutha zabo ukuze bonakalise abo bantwana.”

Kukho nezinye iindlela zokunxibelelana eziye zasetyenziswa. Ulutsha luxhaphaza olunye ngokuhlekisa ngalo kwikhompyutha, lulwenze lube ngamakheswa, luluhlasela ngamazwi okanye lulugrogrise. Kukho iiWeb site ezenzelwe nje ukuhlekisa ngabanye, iie-mail, neechat room nezinto ezifana nazo, ziye zaba ziindlela zokusasaza intlebendwane. Umlawuli wokhuseleko lwe-Internet ukholelwa kwelokuba bamalunga nama-80 ekhulwini abantwana abaphakathi kweminyaka eli-10 ukusa kweli-14 ubudala abaye baxhatshazwa kwi-Internet.

Ewe, ukuxhaphaza akuntw’ intsha. Kodwa ngoku izityholo nokuhleba kuye kwanwenwa okomlilo wedobo nakwezinye iindawo. Ngamanye amaxesha kuthethwa izinto ezimbi kakhulu ngabanye. Kwezinye iimeko iicellphone ezinekhamera ziye zasetyenziselwa ukuvelisa iifoto okanye iividiyo ezikrwada nezenza iintloni zabantu abakwindawo yokugcina iincwadi esikolweni okanye kwiindawo zokuhlamba. Le mifanekiso iye yathunyelwa kwi-Internet ukuze ifunyanwe ngabantu abafuna ukuyibona.

Bayanda Abantu Abaxhalabileyo

Ngenxa yezi ziganeko, iSebe Lezomthetho Nokhuseleko laseNew Jersey, eUnited States, liye lathumela ileta kubazali nabantu abagcina abantwana, bebabongoza ukuba “bancede basabele kwikhwelo lokusetyenziswa kakubi kweInternet ebantwaneni, xa besekhaya nasesikolweni.” Le leta yabethelela ngakumbi ukusetyenziswa kwenkcazelo yobuqu neefoto kwi-Internet. IiSite ezibhengeza le nkcazelo zinomtsalane kubantu abaselula nabakhulu. Le leta yathi: “Njengomzali, ufanele wazi ukuba oko sikuxhalabeleyo kuyinto yokwenene, unokwenza lukhulu ekugcineni abantwana bakho bekhuselekile ngokufumana inkcazelo engakumbi uze ukwazi oko umntwana wakho akwenzayo kwi-Internet.”

Noko ke, kuncinane gqitha oko abanye abazali bakwaziyo ngokwenziwa ngabantwana babo kwi-Internet. Omnye umama osoloko ekwazi oko kwenziwa yintombazana yakhe eneminyaka eli-16 ubudala, uthi: “Abazali banokuf’ isiqaqa ukuba banokufumanisa oko abantwana babo bakuthumelayo nabakubhalayo kwi-Internet.” Ngokutsho kwengcali yokhuseleko kwi-Internet, olunye ulutsha luthumela imifanekiso yesini engcolileyo.

Imiphumo Emibi

Ngaba yonke le nto kukothuka nje kwabantu abadala abasele bekulibele ukufikisa? Izicangca zitheth’ eny’ into. Khawucinge ngoku: Kwezinye iindawo malunga nenkwenkwe nentombazana enye kwamathathu aneminyaka ephakathi kweli-15 neli-17 ubudala bakhe baneentlobano zesini. Ngaphezu kwesiqingatha solutsha oluneminyaka eli-13 ukusa kwi-19 bathi bakhe baba neentlobano zesini emlonyeni.

Ngaba ubugcisa buye banegalelo kwezi zicangca? Kunjalo kanye. INew York Times Magazine inikela le ngxelo: “Iicellphone neInternet, inika ulutsha ixesha elininzi lokuba lodwa yaye oku kwenza ukuthandana okungenanjongo kube lula.” Enyanisweni, ukulungiselela ukuba udibane nomntu wesini esahlukileyo kungaphezulu nje kokucinezela amaqhosha ekhompyutha. Kolunye uhlolisiso, amantombazana amane kwamahlanu ayavuma ukuba akalumkanga ngendlela abemele alumka ngayo xa ekwi-Internet.

Abakhangela kwi-Internet ukuze bathandane okanye bafumane nje umntu abanokulala naye usuku olunye bafumanisa ukuba bazinqikela ilitye elineembovane. UJennifer Welch weSebe Lamapolisa aseKhalifoniya kwisixeko saseNavato, uthi ‘kuye kwanda ukuhlaselwa ngokwesini.’ UWelch uthi amaxhoba aqala adibane nabaxhaphazi bawo kwi-Internet aze avumelane ukudibana nawo ubuso ngobuso.

Lumkela “Ubulumko Behlabathi”!

Imihlathi ecebisa ulutsha ekumaphephandaba namaphephancwadi ayilunqandi ulutsha ukuba lungabi nazintlobano zesini. Nakuba benqwala nje iintloko ekuphileni ubomi obucocekileyo nobunyulu, eyona nto bayiqhwabel’ izandla kukuba neentlobano zesini “ngendlela ekhuselekileyo” kunokuphepha ukuba neentlobano zesini. Badla ngokulilisela ngelithi ‘Asikwazi ukubanqanda, kodwa ke siyakwazi ukubafundisa ukuba baziphathe kakuhle.’

Elinye inqaku elathunyelwa abantu abaselula kwiWeb site yolutsha, kumbandela wokuba neentlobano zesini okanye ukuhlala unyulu, lachaza ezi nkalo zintathu nezimele zixhalatyelwe: (1) ukuba sesichengeni sokukhulelwa, (2) ukuba sesichengeni sokwasulelwa zizifo ezidluliselwa ngokwesini (3) nokubaluleka kokuba bobabini bakulungele ngokweemvakalelo ukuba neentlobano zesini. Le site ithi: “Ekugqibeleni, nguwe omele wenze isigqibo.” Kwaba yinto nje engacacanga xa kwakuthethwa ngokuncokola nomzali ngalo mbandela. Ayizange iphathwe nokuphathwa into yokuba ukuba neentlobano zesini kulungile okanye kuphosakele kusini na.

Ukuba ungumzali, ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo ufuna ukhokelo olubhetele kubantwana bakho kunobu budenge “bobulumko behlabathi.” (1 Korinte 1:20) Yintoni onokuyenza ukuze baphumelele kwiminyaka yabo yokufikisa baze baphephe naziphi na iingozi ekuthethwe ngazo kweli nqaku? Impendulo ayilula njengokutoncula iintambo zekhompyutha okanye kuhluthwe ifoni. Ukugwengula ingxaki phezulu akuyifikeleli intliziyo. (IMizekeliso 4:23) Khumbula ukuba, abantwana bakho banokusebenzisa icellphone neInternet ukuze banelise iimfuno wena njengomzali ongenakukwazi nokuba ungaziqala ngaphi. Ziziphi ezo mfuno?

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 4]

“Ndifika nje ekhaya, ndingena kwi-Internet ndize ndihlale apho ubusuku bonke—ngamanye amaxesha de kubethe intsimbi yesithathu ekuseni.”

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 5]

“Kwi-Internet ungenza nokuba yintoni. Ungazenza omnye umntu kuba kakade akukho mntu ukwazi ngokwenene”

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 7]

“Abazali banokuf’ isiqaqa ukuba banokufumanisa oko abantwana babo bakuthumelayo nabakubhalayo kwi-Internet”

[Ibhokisi/Umfanekiso okwiphepha 6]

Ubuhlobo Kwi-Internet—Ibali Lenye Intombazana

“Ndandisebenzisa iWeb page yesikolo sethu ukuze ndincokole nootitshala nabanye abafundi. Ndaqala ngokuyisebenzisa kangangeyure ngeveki. Akuzange kube kudala ndandikwi-Internet suku ngalunye. Ndandiziva ndilikhoboka layo kuba xa ndandingekho phambi kwayo, ndandicinga ngayo. Ndandingakwazi ukucinga ngeny’ into. Ndaba semva kumsebenzi wam wesikolo, ndandingaphulaphuli kwiintlanganiso zamaKristu de andabahoya nabahlobo bam bokwenene. Abazali bam bakubona oko kwakusenzeka baza banciphisa ixesha endandilichitha kwi-Internet. Kwakungathi ndibethwe olungophiyo. Ndandibibitheka ngumsindo. Kodwa ngoku imiphumo iyandivuyisa yaye ndiye ndafunda ukulungelelana. Andifuni ukuphinda ndibe likhoboka!”—UBianca.