Bonakalisa Uthando Entsatsheni

“UNGAWUTSHISA ukuba uyathanda! Wutshise!” Watsho njalo uTohru kumfazi wakhe, uYoko.a “Ngokuqinisekileyo ndiza kuwutshisa,” waphendula watsho waza wawuntumeka ngomlilo umfanekiso wabo bobabini. Wandula ke ngomsindo wathi, “Ndiza kuyitshisa nale ndlu!” Wandula ke uTohru wamqhwaba ngempama umfazi wakhe, ephelisa loo ngxabano ngogonyamelo.

Kwiminyaka emithathu ngaphambilana, uTohru noYoko babeqalise ubomi babo kunye njengesibini esonwabileyo emtshatweni waso. Ngoko ke, konakala phi? Nangona uTohru wayebonakala eyindoda elungileyo, umfazi wakhe wayevakalelwa kukuba wayengabonakalisi uthando kuye yaye wayengafane azikhathalele iimvakalelo zakhe. Wayebonakala engakwazi ukubonakalisa uthando njengomfazi wakhe. Engakwazi ukukunyamezela oku, uYoko waqalisa ukuba nengqumbo nomsindo. Waqalisa ukuphuthelwa, esoloko exhalabile, engafuni kutya, ecaphuka msinya yaye edandathekile wada waphakuzela. Sekunjalo, uTohru wayebonakala engazixhalabisanga ngale meko eyayisekhayeni lakhe. Kuye yayibonakala nje iqhelekile.

“Amaxesha Amanqam Ekunzima Ukujamelana Nawo”

Iingxaki ezinjalo zixhaphakile nanamhlanje. Umpostile uPawulos waxela kwangaphambili ukuba ixesha lethu liya kuzaliswa ngabantu “abangenawo umsa wemvelo.” (2 Timoti 3:1-5) Igama lesiGrike lantlandlolo eliguqulelwe ngokuthi “abangenawo umsa wemvelo” apha linxulumene ngokusondeleyo negama elithetha umsa wemvelo oba phakathi kwamalungu entsapho. Ngokuqinisekileyo siphila kwixesha apho kungekho msa onjalo. Nokuba ukho umsa, amalungu entsapho asenokungawubonakalisi kwamanye amalungu.

Abazali abaninzi namhlanje abakwazi ukubonakalisa uthando nomsa kubantwana babo. Bambi baye bakhulela kwiintsapho ezingenawo umsa yaye basenokungaqondi ukuba ubomi busenokonwabisa buze bube mnandi ngakumbi xa kukho umsa. Oku kwakubonakala kunjalo ngemeko kaTohru. Ngoxa wayesengumntwana, uyise wayesoloko exakekile emsebenzini yaye wayebuya ebusuku ekhaya. Wayengafane athethe noTohru, yaye xa wayethetha, wayethetha ngokungqwabalala. Unina kaTohru naye wayesebenza yaye wayengachithi ixesha elingako naye. Wayesoloko ehleli phambi komabonwakude. Kwakungafane kubekho umntu onconywayo okanye kuncokoliswane kule ntsapho.

Omnye unobangela usenokuba ngamasiko asekuhlaleni. Kwezinye iindawo kuMbindi noMzantsi Merika, indoda ifanele izityeshele izithethe zasekuhlaleni ukuze ibonakalise uthando kumfazi wayo. Kumazwe amaninzi aseMpuma nawaseAfrika, akulosiko ukubonakalisa uthando ngamazwi nangezenzo. Indoda isenokukufumanisa kunzima ukuthi “ndiyakuthanda” kumfazi nakubantwana bayo. Sekunjalo, sinokufunda isifundo kulwalamano lwentsapho yokuqala, eyangqineka ithembekile ixesha elide.

Ulwalamano Lwentsapho Olungumzekelo

Owona mzekelo ubalaseleyo wentsapho ngowolwalamano olusondeleyo phakathi kukaYehova uThixo noNyana wakhe ekuphela kwamzeleyo. Babonakalisa uthando omnye komnye ngendlela egqibeleleyo. Ngaphezu kweminyaka emininzi engenakubaleka, isidalwa esingumoya esathi kamva saba nguYesu Kristu saba nolwalamano oluhle noYise. Echaza ngolu manyano wathi: “Wayendithanda ngokukhethekileyo imihla ngemihla, ndichulumanca phambi kwakhe amaxesha onke.” (IMizekeliso 8:30) Lo Nyana wayeqinisekile ngothando lukaYise kangangokuba wayenokubonakalisa kwabanye ukuba uYehova wayemthanda ngokukhethekileyo imihla ngemihla. Wayesoloko onwabile ngalo lonke ixesha xa ekunye noYise.

Naxa uYesu wayesemhlabeni njengomntu, lo Nyana kaThixo waqinisekiswa nguYise ukuba umthanda kakhulu. Emva kokuba uYesu ebhaptiziwe, weva ilizwi likaYise lisithi: “Lo nguNyana wam, oyintanda, endikholisiweyo nguye.” (Mateyu 3:17) La yayingamazwi othando akhuthaza gqitha ekuqaleni kothumo lukaYesu emhlabeni! Kusenokuba kwamchukumisa ukuva ukuba uYise uyakholiswa nguye njengoko wayecinga ngobomi bakhe ezulwini.

Ngaloo ndlela, uYehova umisela owona mzekelo mhle ekubonakaliseni uthando ngokupheleleyo kwintsapho yakhe yendalo iphela. Ukuba siyamamkela uYesu Kristu, nathi sinokuthandwa nguYehova. (Yohane 16:27) Nangona singayi kuva amazwi avela ezulwini, siya kuyibona indlela uYehova alubonakalisa ngayo uthando kwindalo, kwilungiselelo ledini likaYesu lentlawulelo, nangezinye iindlela. (1 Yohane 4:9, 10) UYehova ude aphulaphule imithandazo yethu aze ayiphendule. (INdumiso 145:18; Isaya 48:17) Njengoko sihlakulela ulwalamano olusondeleyo noYehova, siba noxabiso olunzulu ngokusinyamekela kwakhe ngothando.

UYesu wafunda kuYise indlela yokubonakalisa uvelwano, ulwazelelelo, ububele nokuba nenkxalabo enzulu ngabanye. Wacacisa esithi: “Naziphi na izinto azenzayo [uYise], noNyana uyazenza ngokufanayo. Kuba uYise unomsa kuNyana kwaye umbonisa zonke izinto yena azenzayo.” (Yohane 5:19, 20) Ngokufanayo, sinokufunda ubuchule bokubonakalisa umsa ngokufundisisa umzekelo uYesu awawumiselayo xa wayesemhlabeni.—Filipi 1:8.

Uthando Entsatsheni—Njani?

Ekubeni ‘uThixo eluthando’ yaye sidalwe “ngokomfanekiso wakhe,” sinako ukuba nothando size silubonakalise. (1 Yohane 4:8; Genesis 1:26, 27) Ukanti, oku akuzenzekeli. Ukuze sibonakalise uthando, simele kuqala sibe nothando kumaqabane nakubantwana bethu. Phawula iimpawu ezintle kubo, enoba zibonakala zingenamsebenzi kangakanani na, uze ucingisise ngazo. Usenokuthi, ‘Akukho nto intle ngomyeni wam [umfazi okanye abantwana bam].’ Abo bakhethelwa amaqabane omtshato basenokuba babengenaluthando lungako ngamaqabane abo. Kusenokwenzeka nokuba abanye babengafuni bantwana. Sekunjalo, khumbula indlela uYehova awavakalelwa ngayo ngomfazi wakhe wokomfuziselo, uhlanga lwakwaSirayeli, kwinkulungwane yeshumi ngaphambi kweXesha Eliqhelekileyo. Xa umprofeti wakhe uEliya wagqiba kwelokuba kwakungekho banquli bakaYehova phakathi kwezizwe ezilishumi zohlanga lwakwaSirayeli, ngokucokisekileyo uYehova waluhlolisisa waza wafumana iqela labantu—bengama-7 000 bebonke—ababeneempawu ezintle kuye. Ngaba unokuxelisa uYehova ngokukhangela oko kulungileyo kumalungu entsapho yakho?—1 Kumkani 19:14-18.

Noko ke, ukuze amanye amalungu entsapho alubone uthando lwakho, ufanele wenze umgudu onyanisekileyo ukulubonakalisa. Nanini na uphawula into efuna ukunconywa, vakalisa uxabiso onalo ngamazwi. Xa lithetha ngomfazi onesidima, iLizwi likaThixo lichaza iimpawu ezibangela umdla zentsapho yakhe lisithi: “Oonyana bakhe bayaphakama bambhengeze enoyolo; umnini wakhe uyaphakama, aze amdumise.” (IMizekeliso 31:28) Phawula indlela ilungu ngalinye lentsapho elavakalisa ngayo ngokukhululekileyo ukuba noxabiso ngelinye. Xa ubawo edumisa umfazi wakhe ngamazwi, umisela umzekelo omhle kunyana wakhe, emkhuthaza ukuba amncome umfazi wakhe xa etshatile.

Kwakhona, abazali bafanele babancome abantwana babo. Oko kunokubanceda abantwana bazihlonele. Ngapha koko, ubani ‘unokumthanda njani ummelwane wakhe njengaye’ ukuba yena akazihloneli? (Mateyu 22:39) Kwelinye icala ukuba abazali basoloko bebagxeka abantwana babo, bengakhe babancome, ngokulula abantwana basenokungazihloneli yaye basenokukufumanisa kunzima ukubonakalisa uthando kwabanye.—Efese 4:31, 32.

Unokulufumana Uncedo

Kuthekani ukuba akukhuliswanga kwikhaya elinothando? Usenokufunda ukubonakalisa uthando. Inyathelo lokuqala kukuba uyibone le ngxaki uze ubone nemfuneko yokuphucula. ILizwi likaThixo, iBhayibhile, liluncedo olukhulu kulo mbandela. Linokufaniswa nesipili. Xa sizihlolisisa kwiimfundiso zeBhayibhile ezifana nesipili, siye sibone iziphako kwindlela esicinga ngayo. (Yakobi 1:23) Ngokuvisisana neemfundiso zeBhayibhile, sinokulungisa naluphi na utyekelo olungafanelekanga. (Efese 4:20-24; Filipi 4:8, 9) Sifanele sikwenze rhoqo oku, singaze ‘siyeke ukwenza okuhle.’—Galati 6:9.

Bambi basenokukufumanisa kunzima ukubonakalisa uthando ngenxa yendlela abakhuliswa ngayo okanye ngenxa yesithethe. Noko ke, uhlolisiso lwakutshanje luye lwabonisa ukuba imiqobo enjalo inokoyiswa. UGqr. Daniel Goleman, ingcali ngezigulo zengqondo, uchaza ukuba ‘neyona mikhwa eyendeleyo efundwe xa ubani esengumntwana inokuguqulwa.’ Ngaphezu kweenkulungwane ezili-19 ezadlulayo, iBhayibhile yabonisa ukuba ngoncedo lomoya kaThixo, nolona tyekelo lwendeleyo lunokuguqulwa. Isibongoza isithi: “Buhlubeni ubuntu obudala kunye noqheliselo lwabo, nize nambathe ubuntu obutsha.”—Kolose 3:9, 10.

Yakuba iboniwe le ngxaki, intsapho inokufundisisa iBhayibhile icinga ngeemfuno zayo. Ngokomzekelo, kutheni ungakhangeli oko kuthethwa yiBhayibhile ‘ngomsa’? Usenokufumana isibhalo esinjengesithi: “Nivile ngonyamezelo lukaYobhi, nayibona nendlela uYehova awambuyekeza ngayo, ngokuba uYehova unomsa omkhulu nenceba.” (Yakobi 5:11) Yandula ke ucinge ngengxelo yeBhayibhile engoYobhi, unikela ingqalelo kwindlela uYehova awayenomsa nenceba ngayo kuye. Ngokungathandabuzekiyo uya kufuna ukuxelisa uYehova ngokuba nomsa nenceba kwintsapho yakho.

Noko ke, ngenxa yokungafezeki “sonke siyakhubeka izihlandlo ezininzi” ngendlela esilusebenzisa ngayo ulwimi lwethu. (Yakobi 3:2) Entsatsheni, sisenokungalusebenzisi ulwimi lwethu ngendlela ekhuthazayo. Ngenxa yoko, oko sifanele sikuthandazele size sithembele kuYehova. Unganikezeli. “Thandazani ngokungapheziyo.” (1 Tesalonika 5:17) UYehova uya kubanceda abo bafuna ukuthandwa entsatsheni kuquka nabo bafuna ukubonakalisa uthando kodwa abangakwaziyo ukwenjenjalo.

Ngaphezu koko, ngothando uYehova ulungiselele uncedo kwibandla lamaKristu. UYakobi wabhala: “Ngaba kukho nabani na ogulayo [ngokomoya] phakathi kwenu? Makabizele kuye amadoda amakhulu ebandla, aze wona amthandazele, amthambise ngeoli egameni likaYehova.” (Yakobi 5:14) Ewe, abadala abakumabandla amaNgqina kaYehova banokuba luncedo olukhulu kwiintsapho ezinamalungu anengxaki yokubonakalisa uthando kwamanye. Nangona bengezongcali zezonyango, ngomonde abadala banokuwanceda amanye amakholwa, bengawaxeleli oko afanele akwenze, kodwa bewakhumbuza ngembono kaYehova baze bathandaze kunye nawo yaye bawathandazele.—INdumiso 119:105; Galati 6:1.

Kwimeko kaTohru noYoko, abadala abangamaKristu babesoloko beziphulaphula iingxaki zabo baze babathuthuzele. (1 Petros 5:2, 3) Ngamanye amaxesha, omnye umdala nomfazi wakhe babebatyelela ukuze uYoko azuze ngokunxulumana nomfazi ongumKristu onamava nowayenokumbuyisela ‘ezingqondweni ukuba athande indoda yakhe.’ (Tito 2:3, 4) Ngokubonakalisa ukuqonda novelwano kwiimbandezelo neentlungu zamanye amaKristu, abadala baba ‘yindawo yokuzimela umoya nendawo yokuzifihla esiphangweni.’—Isaya 32:1, 2.

Ngoncedo lwabadala abanobubele, uTohru waqonda ukuba unengxaki ekubonakaliseni iimvakalelo zakhe nokuba kule “mihla yokugqibela,” uSathana uhlasela ilungiselelo lentsapho. (2 Timoti 3:1) UTohru wagqiba kwelokuba amelane nale ngxaki yakhe. Waqalisa ukubona ukuba ukungalubonakalisi kwakhe uthando kubangelwa kukungalufumani ngoxa wayesakhula. Ngofundisiso olunzulu lweBhayibhile nomthandazo, ngokuthe ngcembe uTohru wazinyamekela iimvakalelo zikaYoko.

Nangona wayemqumbele uTohru, xa uYoko waqonda imvelaphi yentsapho yakhe waza wabona iimpazamo zakhe, wenza umgudu onyanisekileyo wokubona okuhle kwindoda yakhe. (Mateyu 7:1-3; Roma 5:12; Kolose 3:12-14) Ngokunyanisekileyo wacela ukuba uYehova amomeleze ukuze aqhubeke eyithanda indoda yakhe. (Filipi 4:6, 7) Ekuhambeni kwexesha, uTohru waqalisa ukubonakalisa uthando, ngendlela evuyisa umfazi wakhe.

Ewe, enoba ukufumanisa kunzima ukuba nothando uze ulubonakalise kwintsapho yakho, ngokuqinisekileyo unokuyoyisa loo ngxaki. ILizwi likaThixo lisinika ukhokelo olufanelekileyo. (INdumiso 19:7) Ngokuqonda indlela onzulu ngayo lo mbandela, ngokuzama ukubona okuhle kumalungu entsapho yakho, ngokufundisisa nangokusebenzisa iLizwi likaThixo, ngokuthembela kuYehova ngokuthandaza ngokunyanisekileyo nangokufuna uncedo lwabadala abaqolileyo abangamaKristu, unokukoyisa oko kubonakala kungumqobo phakathi kwakho nentsapho yakho. (1 Petros 5:7) Nawe unokuvuya, njengomnye umyeni waseUnited States. Wakhuthazwa ukuba abonakalise uthando kumfazi wakhe. Xa ekugqibeleni waqweba inkalipho yokuthi “ndiyakuthanda,” wamangaliswa yindlela awaphendula ngayo umfazi wakhe. Eneenyembezi emehlweni, wathi: “Nam ndiyakuthanda, kodwa esi sisihlandlo sokuqala ukuba uthethe njalo emva kweminyaka engama-25.” Musa ukulinda ithuba elide ukuze ubonakalise uthando kwiqabane nakubantwana bakho!

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 28]

UYehova unikela uncedo ngeLizwi lakhe, iBhayibhile