Isahluko 11

Londoloza Uxolo Kwintsapho Yakho

1. Ziziphi ezinye zezinto ezinokwahlula iintsapho?

BANOYOLO abakwiintsapho ezinothando, ezinolwazelelelo nezinoxolo. Sithemba ukuba neyakho intsapho injalo. Okulusizi kukuba, iintsapho ezininzi azinjalo yaye zahlukene ngenxa yezizathu ezahlukahlukeneyo. Yintoni eyahlula iintsapho? Kwesi sahluko siza kuxubusha izizathu ezithathu. Kwezinye iintsapho, amalungu entsapho akananqulo lufanayo. Kwezinye, abantwana basenokuba abangobantwana babazali balapho. Ukanti kwezinye, ukutsala nzima okanye ukunqwenela izinto eziphathekayo ezingakumbi kubonakala kuwachithachitha amalungu entsapho. Ukanti, iimeko ezahlula intsapho ethile zisenokungayichaphazeli enye. Yintoni eyenza loo mahluko?

2. Bambi balufuna phi ukhokelo kubomi bentsapho, kodwa nguwuphi owona mthombo wokhokelo olunjalo?

² Enye yazo yimbono eninayo. Ukuba uzama ngokwenene ukuqonda imbono yomnye umntu, maninzi amathuba okuba uyiqonde indlela yokugcina intsapho yakho imanyene. Eyesibini ngumthombo wokhokelo owusebenzisayo. Abantu abaninzi balandela amacebiso abo basebenza nabo, abamelwane, ababhali bemihlathi yamaphephandaba, okanye olunye ukhokelo lwabantu. Noko ke, abanye baye bafumanisa oko kuthethwa liLizwi likaThixo ngemeko yabo, baza basebenzisa oko bakufunda kulo. Ukwenza oku kungayinceda njani intsapho ilondoloze uxolo?—2 Timoti 3:16, 17.

UKUBA INDODA YAKHO INONQULO OLWAHLUKILEYO KOLWAKHO

3. (a) Sithini isiluleko seBhayibhile ngokutshata nomntu ononqulo olwahlukileyo kolwakho? (b) Yiyiphi eminye imigaqo esisiseko esebenzayo ukuba elinye iqabane liyakholwa yaye elinye alikholwa?

³ IBhayibhile isiluleka kabukhali ukuba singatshati nomntu ononqulo olwahlukileyo kolwethu. (Duteronomi 7:3, 4; 1 Korinte 7:39) Noko ke, usenokuba ufunde inyaniso yeBhayibhile sele utshatile kodwa indoda yakho ayayifunda. Yintoni omele uyenze? Kakade ke, isibhambathiso somtshato sisemi. (1 Korinte 7:10) IBhayibhile ibethelela ukuba iqhina lomtshato limele libe sisigxina yaye ikhuthaza abantu abatshatileyo ukuba bazilungise iingxaki zabo kunokuba bazibaleke. (Efese 5:28-31; Tito 2:4, 5) Noko ke, kuthekani ukuba indoda ikuchasa ngokukrakra ukuqhelisela kwakho unqulo olukhuthazwa yiBhayibhile? Isenokuzama ukukuthintela ungayi kwiintlanganiso, okanye isenokuthi ayifuni umfazi wayo ahambe engena ezindlwini, ethetha ngonqulo. Uya kwenza ntoni?

4. Umfazi angalubonisa njani uvelwano ukuba indoda yakhe inonqulo olwahlukileyo kolwakhe?

⁴ Zibuze, ‘Kutheni indoda yam ivakalelwa ngaloo ndlela?’ (IMizekeliso 16:20, 23) Ukuba ayiyiqondi kakuhle le nto uyenzayo, isenokukhathazeka. Okanye isenokuba ayonwatyiswanga zizalamane kuba ungasawenzi amasiko athile abalulekileyo kuzo. Enye indoda yathi: “Xa ndindedwa endlwini, ndandiziva ndishiyiwe.” Le ndoda yayicinga ukuba unqulo luyihluthe umfazi. Ukanti ngenxa yekratshi yayingayithethi into yokuba ibhuqwa sisithukuthezi. Indoda yakho isenokuba ifuna uyiqinisekise ukuba ukuthanda kwakho uYehova akuthethi kuthi ngoku akusayithandi njengakuqala. Qiniseka ukuba uchitha ixesha nayo.

5. Yiyiphi indlela amele alungelelane ngayo umfazi xa indoda yakhe ikunqulo olwahlukileyo kolwakhe?

⁵ Noko ke, kukho enye into ebalulekileyo omele uyiqwalasele ukuze uyisingathe ngobulumko le meko. ILizwi likaThixo likhuthaza abafazi lisithi: “Wathobeleni amadoda enu, njengoko kufanelekile eNkosini.” (Kolose 3:18) Ngaloo ndlela, lisilumkisa nxamnye nomoya wokuzimela geqe. Ukongezelela, xa le ndinyana isithi “njengoko kufanelekile eNkosini,” ibonisa ukuba ukuthobela umyeni wakho kufanele kuquke ukuthobela iNkosi. Kufuneka ukulungelelana.

6. Yiyiphi imigaqo efanele ikhunjulwe ngumfazi ongumKristu?

⁶ KumKristu, ukuya kwiintlanganiso zebandla nokunikela ubungqina kwabanye ngokholo olusekelwe eBhayibhileni zizinto ezibalulekileyo zonqulo oluyinyaniso angamele azityeshele. (Roma 10:9, 10, 14; Hebhere 10:24, 25) Ngoko ke, ubuya kwenza ntoni ukuba umntu ubekuxelela ngokungqalileyo ukuba ungayenzi into ethile efunwa nguThixo? Abapostile bakaYesu Kristu bathi: “Simele sithobele uThixo njengomphathi kunabantu.” (IZenzo 5:29) Umzekelo wabo usibonisa indlela esimele siyilandele kwiimeko ezininzi ebomini. Ngaba ukuthanda kwakho uYehova kuya kukushukumisela ekubeni uzinikele kuye ngendlela emfaneleyo? Kwangaxeshanye, ngaba ukuthanda nokuhlonela indoda yakho kuya kukwenza uzame ukukwenza oku ngendlela eyamkelekileyo kuyo?—Mateyu 4:10; 1 Yohane 5:3.

7. Yiyiphi into amele azimisele kuyo umfazi ongumKristu?

⁷ UYesu wabonisa ukuba oku akuyi kusoloko kusenzeka. Walumkisa ngelokuba ngenxa yokuchaswa konqulo oluyinyaniso, amalungu akholwayo eentsapho ezithile aya kuziva ahlukanisiwe, ngokungathi kufakwe ikrele phakathi kwawo neentsapho zawo. (Mateyu 10:34-36) Omnye umfazi waseJapan wayenale ngxaki. Wachaswa yindoda yakhe kangangeminyaka eli-11. Yayimphethe kakubi yaye yayimtshixela ngaphandle amaxesha amaninzi. Kodwa wazingisa. Abahlobo bakhe kwibandla lamaKristu bamnceda. Wathandaza ngokuzingisileyo yaye wafumana ukhuthazo olungathethekiyo kweyoku-1 kaPetros 2:20. Lo mfazi ungumKristu wayeyisekile kwelokuba ukuba wayenokuhlala eqinile, ngaminazan’ ithile umyeni wakhe wayeya kumthelela ekukhonzeni uYehova. Yaye kwaba njalo.

8, 9. Ziziphi izinto amele azenze umfazi ukuze aphephe ukubeka imiqobo engeyomfuneko phambi kwendoda yakhe?

⁸ Zininzi izinto onokuzenza ukuguqula isimo sengqondo seqabane lakho. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba indoda yakho iyaluchasa unqulo lwakho, musa ukuyenza ibe nezizathu zokukukhalazela kweminye imibandela. Ikhaya malihlale libeth’ umoya. Nyamekela inkangeleko yakho. Yibonise ukuba uyithanda ngokwenene yaye uyayixabisa. Kunokuyigxeka, yixhase. Yibonise ukuba uyithembile njengentloko. Xa uvakalelwa kukuba ikonile musa ukuziphindezela. (1 Petros 2:21, 23) Kuxolele ukungafezeki kwayo, yaye xa nixabana, ngokuzithoba yiba ngowokuqala ukucela uxolo.—Efese 4:26.

⁹ Mayingakufumani kade ukutya ngenxa yokuba uye kwiintlanganiso. Kwakhona usenokukhetha ukuya kubulungiseleli bamaKristu ngamaxesha engekhoyo indoda yakho. Kububulumko ukuba umfazi ongumKristu angayishumayezi indoda yakhe xa ingafuni. Kunoko, makalandele isiluleko sompostile uPetros esithi: “Nina bafazi, wathobeleni amadoda enu, ukuze, ukuba nawaphi na akalithobeli ilizwi, azuzeke ngaphandle kwelizwi ngehambo yabafazi bawo, ngenxa yokuba eye angamangqina okuzibonela ehambo yenu enyulu ndawonye nentlonelo enzulu.” (1 Petros 3:1, 2) Abafazi abangamaKristu bakuzabalazela ngakumbi ukubonakalisa iziqhamo zomoya kaThixo.—Galati 5:22, 23.

XA UMFAZI ENGENGOMKRISTU

10. Indoda ekholwayo ifanele yenze ntoni kumfazi wayo ukuba akanankolelo zifanayo nezayo?

¹⁰ Kuthekani ukuba indoda ingumKristu yaye umfazi akanguye? IBhayibhile inalo ulwalathiso kuloo meko. Ithi: “Ukuba nawuphi na umzalwana unomfazi ongakholwayo, ukanti yena evumelana nokuhlala naye, makangamshiyi.” (1 Korinte 7:12) Kwakhona ikhuthaza amadoda isithi: “Hlalani nibathanda abafazi benu.”—Kolose 3:19.

11. Indoda inokukubonisa njani ukuqonda ize ngobuchule iqhelisele ubuntloko kumfazi wayo ukuba akangomKristu?

¹¹ Ukuba umfazi wakho ukunqulo olwahlukileyo kolwakho, kuphaphele ngokukhethekileyo ukumhlonela umkakho yaye ube nolwazelelelo ngeemvakalelo zakhe. Njengomntu omkhulu, kuyafuneka afumane inkululeko ethile yokuqhelisela iinkolelo zonqulo lwakhe, enoba wena akuvumelani nazo. Xa uqala ukuthetha naye ngokholo lwakho, musa ukulindela ukuba alahle ezakhe ngenxa yezi zifika ngoku. Kunokusuka umhle entloko umxelela ukuba izinto ebebezenza kangangeminyaka nentsapho yakowabo zibubuvuvu, ngomonde zama ukuqiqa naye ngeZibhalo. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba uziva elahliwe ekubeni wena uchitha ixesha elininzi kwizinto zebandla. Usenokuyichasa imigudu yakho yokukhonza uYehova, ukanti ngokwenza oko usenokuba uthi: “Ndifuna ixesha elingakumbi nawe!” Yiba nomonde. Ngenxa yolwazelelelo nothando onalo, ekuhambeni kwexesha usenokuncedwa amkele unqulo oluyinyaniso.—Kolose 3:12-14; 1 Petros 3:8, 9.

UKUQEQESHA ABANTWANA

12. Kwanaxa indoda nomfazi benonqulo olungafaniyo, imigaqo yeZibhalo ifanele isetyenziswe njani ekuqeqesheni abantwana babo?

¹² Kwintsapho engekho kunqulo olunye, ukufundiswa kwabantwana ngonqulo kudla ngokuba yingxaki. Inokusetyenziswa njani imigaqo yeZibhalo? IBhayibhile inika utata imbopheleleko eyintloko yokufundisa abantwana, kodwa nomama unendima yakhe ebalulekileyo. (IMizekeliso 1:8; thelekisa iGenesis 18:19; Duteronomi 11:18, 19.) Enoba akabamkeli ubuntloko bukaKristu, utata useyintloko yentsapho.

13, 14. Ukuba indoda iyamalela umfazi wayo ukuba aye kwiintlanganiso zamaKristu nabantwana okanye afundisise nabo, yintoni anokuyenza?

¹³ Bambi ootata abangakholwayo abachasi xa oomama befundisa abantwana imibandela yonqulo. Abanye bayakuchasa oko. Kuthekani ukuba indoda yakho ayikuvumeli uye kwiintlanganiso nabantwana okanye ayifuni nokuba ubafundele iBhayibhile ekhaya? Zininzi iimbopheleleko ekufuneka uzilungelelanisile—imbopheleleko onayo kuYehova uThixo, kwindoda yakho eyintloko nakubantwana bakho obathandayo. Unokuzilungelelanisa njani ezi zinto?

¹⁴ Ngokuqinisekileyo uya kuwuthandazela lo mbandela. (Filipi 4:6, 7; 1 Yohane 5:14) Kodwa ekugqibeleni, nguwe omele wenze isigqibo soko uza kukwenza. Ukuba uyaqhubeka ngobuchule, uyicacisela indoda yakho ukuba akubuceli umngeni ubuntloko bayo, mhlawumbi ekugqibeleni isenokungachasi kangako. Kwanaxa indoda yakho ikwalela ukuba uye kwiintlanganiso nabantwana okanye ube nesifundo seBhayibhile esicwangcisiweyo nabantwana, usenokubafundisa. Ngencoko yakho yemihla ngemihla nangomzekelo wakho omhle, zama ukubethelela kubo ukuba nothando ngoYehova, ukuba nokholo kwiLizwi lakhe, ukuhlonela abazali—kuquka uyise—ukuthanda abantu nokubaxhalabela, kunye nokuxabisa ukusebenza ngenkuthalo. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, utata usenokubona imiphumo emihle aze akuqonde ukubaluleka kwemigudu yakho.—IMizekeliso 23:24.

15. Yiyiphi imbopheleleko anayo utata okholwayo ekufundiseni abantwana?

¹⁵ Ukuba uyindoda ekholwayo yaye umkakho akakholwa, ngoko umele uyithwale imbopheleleko yokukhulisela abantwana bakho “kwingqeqesho nasekweyiselweni kwengqondo kuYehova.” (Efese 6:4) Kakade ke, xa usenza oko ufanele ube nobubele, ube nothando nolwazelelelo kwindlela oqhubana ngayo nomkakho.

UKUBA AKUKHO KUNQULO OLUNYE NABAZALI BAKHO

16, 17. Yiyiphi imigaqo yeBhayibhile abantwana abamele bayikhumbule ukuba bamkela ukholo olwahlukileyo kolwabazali babo?

¹⁶ Ixhaphakile into yokuba abantwana abancinane bamkele iimbono zonqulo ezahlukileyo kwezabazali. Ngaba nawe wenze oko? Ukuba kunjalo, iBhayibhile inesiluleko esikufaneleyo.

¹⁷ ILizwi likaThixo lithi: “Bathobeleni abazali benu ngokumanyene neNkosi, kuba oku kububulungisa: ‘Beka uyihlo nonyoko.’” (Efese 6:1, 2) Oko kuquka ukubahlonela ngokufanelekileyo abazali. Noko ke, nangona kubalulekile ukuhlonela abazali, akamele alityalwe uThixo oyinyaniso. Xa umntwana ekhule ngokwaneleyo ukuba angazenzela izigqibo, unembopheleleko ethe chatha ngezinto azenzayo. Oku akusebenzi kumthetho wehlabathi kuphela kodwa kusebenza ngokukhethekileyo kumthetho wobuthixo. IBhayibhile ithi: “Ngamnye wethu uya kunikela ingxelo kuThixo.”—Roma 14:12.

18, 19. Ukuba abantwana banonqulo olwahlukileyo kolwabazali babo, yiyiphi indlela abanokubanceda ngayo baziqonde bhetele iinkolelo zabo?

¹⁸ Ukuba iinkolelo zakho zikubangela wenze iinguqulelo ezithile ebomini bakho, zama ukuziqonda iimbono zabazali bakho. Basenokuvuya gqitha xa, ukufundisisa kwakho iBhayibhile nokusebenzisa iimfundiso zayo, kukubangela ube nentlonelo ngakumbi, uthobele ngakumbi, ukhuthale ngakumbi koko bafuna ukwenze. Noko ke, ukuba ukholo lwakho olutsha lukubangela uchase iinkolelo namasiko abawaxabisileyo, basenokuvakalelwa kukuba udlala ngelifa abafuna ukukushiyela lona. Kwakhona basenokukusizela ukuba oko ukwenzayo akuthandwa ekuhlaleni okanye kukwenza uziyeke izinto obunosukelo lwazo abebecinga ukuba zinokukunceda uphumelele ngokwezinto eziphathekayo. Kwakhona ikratshi lisenokuba ngumqobo. Basenokuvakalelwa kukuba, ngokungathi kunjalo, uthi nguwe ochanileyo bona bayaphazama.

¹⁹ Ngoko ke, ngokukhawuleza zama ukuba abazali bakho badibane nabadala abathile okanye amaNgqina aqolileyo akwibandla lasekuhlaleni. Khuthaza abazali bakho batyelele iHolo yoBukumkani ukuze bazivele oko kuxutyushwayo baze bazibonele uhlobo lwabantu alulo amaNgqina kaYehova. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, kusenokwenzeka abazali bakho bathambe. Kwanaxa abazali bengafuni nokuva, belukrazula uncwadi lweBhayibhile, baze babalele abantwana babo ukuba baye kwiintlanganiso zamaKristu, adla ngokubakho amathuba okufundela kwenye indawo, okuthetha namanye amaKristu, nawokunikela ubungqina nokunceda abanye ngokungacwangciswanga. Kwakhona unokuthandaza kuYehova. Lumbi ulutsha kuye kufuneke lulinde de lukhule ukuze luphume ekhaya ngaphambi kokuba lwenze inkqubela. Noko ke, enoba imeko yekhaya lakho injani, musa ukulibala ‘ukubeka uyihlo nonyoko.’ Phumeza indima yakho ukuze ufak’ isandla kuxolo ekhaya. (Roma 12:17, 18) Ngaphezu koko, sukela uxolo noThixo.

UCELOMNGENI LOKUBA NGUMZALI WESIBINI

20. Ziziphi iimvakalelo abasenokuba nazo abantwana ukuba utata okanye umama wabo ngumzali wesibini?

²⁰ Kumakhaya amaninzi imeko ezisa olona celomngeni asilonqulo kodwa kukuba ngumzali. Iintsapho ezininzi zinabantwana bomtshato wangaphambili womzali omnye okanye wabazali bobabini. Kwiintsapho ezinjalo, abantwana basenokuba nengxaki yomona nengqumbo okanye mhlawumbi babe nengxaki yokunyaniseka kumzali wabo. Ngenxa yoko, basenokungayijongeli ntweni imigudu yomzali wesibini yokuba ngutata okanye umama olungileyo. Yintoni enokunceda intsapho enomzali wesibini iphumelele?

21. Nangona beneemeko ezikhethekileyo, kutheni abazali besibini bemele bathembele kuncedo lwemigaqo eseBhayibhileni?

²¹ Qonda ukuba nangona iimeko zahlukile, imigaqo yeBhayibhile eyenza ezinye iintsapho ziphumelele iyasebenza nakule. Ukutyeshela loo migaqo kusenokubonakala kuluncedo, okwexesha elithile, kodwa kusenokuzisa iingxaki ezinkulu kamva. (INdumiso 127:1; IMizekeliso 29:15) Hlakulela ubulumko nokuqonda—ubulumko bokusebenzisa imigaqo yobuthixo eneengenelo ezihlala zihleli engqondweni yakho, yaye ukuqonda kukwenza uphawule isizathu sokuba amalungu entsapho athethe aze enze izinto ezithile. Kwakhona uvelwano luyafuneka.—IMizekeliso 16:21; 24:3; 1 Petros 3:8.

22. Kutheni abantwana besenokukufumanisa kunzima ukwamkela umzali wesibini?

²² Ukuba ungumzali wesibini, usenokukhumbula ukuba xa wawungumhlobo wentsapho, babekwamkela abantwana. Kodwa wathi wakuba ngumzali wabo wesibini, satshintsha isimo sabo sengqondo. Ekubeni bekhumbula umzali wabo wokwenene ongasahlali nabo, abantwana basenokuba bazama ukunyaniseka kuye, mhlawumbi bevakalelwa kukuba ufuna ukuhlutha umsa abanawo ngomzali wabo ongekhoyo. Maxa wambi, basenokukuxelela phandle ukuba akungoyise okanye unina. Loo mazwi angena kabuhlungu. Sekunjalo, “musa ukukungxamela ukuqumba ngomoya wakho.” (INtshumayeli 7:9) Ukuqonda novelwano ziyafuneka ukuze uziqonde iimvakalelo zabantwana.

23. Uqeqesho lunokusingathwa njani kwintsapho enomzali wesibini?

²³ Ezo mpawu zibaluleke gqitha xa udlulisela uqeqesho. Kubalulekile ukuba ungatshintshatshintshi kuqeqesho oludluliselayo. (IMizekeliso 6:20; 13:1) Yaye ekubeni abantwana bengafani, uqeqesho lwakho lusenokwahluka ngenxa yeemeko zabo. Abanye abazali besibini bafumanisa ukuba ekuqaleni, kusenokuba kuhle ukuba ibe ngumzali wabo wokwenene owenza lo msebenzi wobuzali. Noko ke, kubalulekile ukuba abazali bobabini bavumelane ngoqeqesho baze babambelele kulo, bangabi ngakwicala lomntwana wabo wokwenene kunalo wesibini. (IMizekeliso 24:23) Ukuthobela kubalulekile, kodwa kuyafuneka ukungafezeki kuxolelwe. Musa ukuzibaxa izinto. Qeqesha ngothando.—Kolose 3:21.

24. Yintoni enokunceda ekuthinteleni iingxaki zokuziphatha phakathi kwamalungu esini esahlukileyo kwintsapho enomzali wesibini?

²⁴ Ukuxubusha njengentsapho kungaluncedo gqitha ekuphepheni inkathazo. Oku kunokuyinceda intsapho inikele ingqalelo kwizinto ezibalulekileyo ebomini. (Thelekisa amaFilipi 1:9-11.) Kwakhona kunokunceda ngamnye abone indlela anokufak’ isandla ngayo ekufikeleleni usukelo lwentsapho. Ukongezelela, ukungafihli nto xa nixubusha njengentsapho kunokuthintela iingxaki zokuziphatha. Amantombazana afanele ayazi indlela amakanxibe ngayo namakaziphathe ngayo xa ekunye notata wesibini nakoonyana bomzali wesibini, yaye amakhwenkwe kufuneka abonise ihambo efanelekileyo xa ekunye nomama wawo wesibini nakwiintombi zomzali wesibini.—1 Tesalonika 4:3-8.

25. Ziziphi iimpawu ezinokunceda intsapho enomzali wesibini ihlale inoxolo?

²⁵ Xa uhlangabezana nocelomngeni lokuba ngumzali wesibini, yiba nomonde. Kufuna ixesha ukwakha ulwalamano olutsha. Ukwakha uthando nentlonelo yabantwana abangengobakho kusenokuba ngumsebenzi omkhulu. Kodwa unako ukulwakha. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo ukuze ufumane uxolo kwintsapho enomzali wesibini kukuba nentliziyo elumkileyo neqondayo, kunye nomnqweno onamandla wokukholisa uYehova. (IMizekeliso 16:20) Ezo mpawu zingakunceda uhlangabezane nale meko.

NGABA UKUSUKELA IZINTO EZIPHATHEKAYO KUYALAHLULA IKHAYA LAKHO?

26. Iingxaki nesimo sengqondo ngezinto eziphathekayo zinokuyahlula njani intsapho?

²⁶ Iingxaki nesimo sengqondo ngezinto eziphathekayo zinokuzahlula iintsapho ngeendlela ezininzi. Okulusizi kukuba zimbi iintsapho ziphazanyiswa ziingxabano zemali nakukunqwenela ukuba zizityebi—okanye ubuncinane ukuma kakuhle. Ukwahlukana kusenokuqala xa amaqabane omabini esebenza yaye eqalisa ukuba nesimo sengqondo sokuba “le imali yeyam, leyo yeyakho.” Kwanokuba akaxabani, xa amaqabane omabini esebenza asenokuzifumanisa exakeke gqitha de angabi nalo nexesha lokuba kunye. Omnye umkhwa okhulayo ehlabathini kukuba ootata baye kusebenza kude neentsapho zabo ixesha elide—iinyanga okanye iminyaka—ukuze bafumane imali engaphezu kunaleyo banokuyifumana ekhaya. Oku kusenokubangela iingxaki ezinzulu.

27. Yiyiphi eminye imigaqo enokunceda intsapho iphumelele xa ineengxaki zemali?

²⁷ Akukho migaqo inokumiselwa ekusingatheni ezi meko, ekubeni iintsapho ngeentsapho kufuneka zihlangabezane neengxaki ngeengxaki. Sekunjalo, isiluleko seBhayibhile sinokuba luncedo. Ngokomzekelo, IMizekeliso 13:10 ibonisa ukuba ukutsala nzima ngokungeyomfuneko maxa wambi kunokuphetshwa ‘ngokucebisana.’ Oku akuphelelanga nje ekuphalazeni ezakho izimvo kodwa kuquka ukufuna icebiso nokufumanisa indlela omnye umntu awujonga ngayo lo mbandela. Ngokubhekele phaya, ukuqingqa imali ngendlela efanele intsapho kunokuyimanyanisa imigudu yayo. Maxa wambi kubalulekile ukuba—mhlawumbi okwexeshana—amaqabane omabini asebenze ngaphandle kwekhaya ngenxa yeendleko ezongezelelekileyo, ngokukodwa xa kukho abantwana okanye xa kukho abanye abaxhomekeke kuwo. Xa kunjalo, indoda inokumqinisekisa umkayo ukuba inalo ixesha elichitha naye. Yona nabantwana bayo basenokumncedisa kweminye imisebenzi asenokuba ngokuqhelekileyo ebeyenza yedwa.—Filipi 2:1-4.

28. Ziziphi izinto eya kuthi intsapho xa izikhumbula ziyincede imanyane?

²⁸ Noko ke, khumbula ukuba ngoxa imali ifuneka kule nkqubo yezinto, ayizisi lonwabo. Ngokuqinisekileyo ayizisi bomi. (INtshumayeli 7:12) Eneneni, ukugxininisa kwizinto eziphathekayo kunokubangela ingozi ngokomoya nangokuziphatha. (1 Timoti 6:9-12) Hayi indlela ekulunge ngakumbi ngayo ukufuna uBukumkani bukaThixo nobulungisa bakhe kuqala, uqinisekile ukuba uya kuyisikelela imigudu yakho yokufumana izinto eziyimfuneko ebomini! (Mateyu 6:25-33; Hebhere 13:5) Ngokubeka izilangazelelo zokomoya kuqala nokusukela ukuba noxolo noThixo ngaphezu kweento zonke, usenokufumanisa ukuba intsapho yakho, nangona mhlawumbi yahlulwe ziimeko ezithile, iya kuba yemanyene ngokwenene ngeendlela ezibaluleke gqitha.

LE MIGAQO YEBHAYIBHILE INGAWANCEDA NJANI . . . AMALUNGU ENTSAPHO ALONDOLOZE UXOLO KWIKHAYA LAWO?

AmaKristu ahlakulela ukuqonda.—IMizekeliso 16:21; 24:3.

Isibini simele sibonise uthando nentlonelo nokuba asikho kunqulo olunye.—Efese 5:23, 25.

UmKristu akanakuze awaphule ngabom umthetho kaThixo.—IZenzo 5:29.

AmaKristu angabadali boxolo.—Roma 12:18.

Musa ukukhubeka ngokukhawuleza.—INtshumayeli 7:9.

[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 139]

IMITSHATO EFANELEKILEYO IZISA UKUNDILEKA NOXOLO

Kwimihla yethu amadoda namabhinqa amaninzi ahlalisana njengendoda nomfazi engazibophelelanga ngokwasemthethweni. Le yimeko asenokuba kuyo umntu osandul’ ukukholwa. Kwezinye iimeko olu manyano lusenokwamkelwa ekuhlaleni okanye lisiko lalapho, kodwa alukho mthethweni. Noko ke, umgaqo weBhayibhile ufuna ukuba umtshato ubhaliswe ngokufanelekileyo. (Tito 3:1; Hebhere 13:4) Kubantu abakwibandla lamaKristu, iBhayibhile ikwachaza ukuba kumanyano lomtshato indoda ifanele ibe nomfazi omnye nomfazi abe nendoda enye. (1 Korinte 7:2; 1 Timoti 3:2, 12) Ukuthobela lo mgaqo linyathelo lokuqala lokuba noxolo kwikhaya lakho. (INdumiso 119:165) Okufunwa nguYehova kusengqiqweni yaye akuloxanduva. Asifundisa kona kunceda thina.—Isaya 48:17, 18.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 130]

Zama ukuziqonda iimbono zomnye umntu

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 138]

Enoba ungumzali wokwenene okanye wesibini, yayama ngokhokelo lweBhayibhile

Isahluko 12

Unokuzoyisa Iingxaki Ezonakalisa Intsapho

1. Ziziphi iingxaki ezifihlakeleyo ezikhoyo kwezinye iintsapho?

INQWELO-MAFUTHA endala isandul’ ukuhlanjwa yaza yapolishwa. Kubantu abadlulayo ibonakala ibengezela, ngathi intsha. Kodwa ngaphakathi, umhlwa uyasiqhenkqetha esi sithuthi. Zinjalo ke ezinye iintsapho. Nangona ngaphandle zibonakala zingenangxaki, uncumo lwazo lufihla uloyiko nentlungu ezikuyo. Xa zizodwa kukho izinto eziluqhenkqethayo uxolo lwezo ntsapho. Iingxaki ezimbini ezinokubangela oku kukukhotyokiswa butywala nogonyamelo.

UMONAKALO OBANGELWA KUKUKHOTYOKISWA BUTYWALA

2. (a) Yiyiphi imbono yeBhayibhile ngokusetyenziswa kotywala? (b) Kuyintoni ukukhotyokiswa butywala?

² IBhayibhile ayikugwebi ukusetyenziswa kotywala ngobungcathu, kodwa ubunxila iyabugweba. (IMizekeliso 23:20, 21; 1 Korinte 6:9, 10; 1 Timoti 5:23; Tito 2:2, 3) Noko ke, ukukhotyokiswa butywala asikokunxila nje; kukusoloko ufuna utywala uze ungakwazi ukuyilawula indlela obusela ngayo. Amakhoboka otywala anokuba ngabantu abakhulu. Okulusizi kukuba nolutsha lunokuba ngawo.

3, 4. Chaza imiphumo yokukhotyokiswa butywala kwiqabane lekhoboka lotywala nasebantwaneni.

³ IBhayibhile yabonisa kwangaphambili ukuba ukusebenzisa kakubi utywala kunokuluphazamisa uxolo lwentsapho. (Duteronomi 21:18-21) Yonke intsapho iyachatshazelwa yimiphumo eqhenkqethayo yokukhotyokiswa butywala. Umfazi walo usenokuwa evuka ezama ukunceda eli khoboka lotywala okanye ezama ukuhlangabezana nokuguquguquka kwesimilo salo.a Umfazi uye azame ukufihla utywala balo, abulahle, afihle imali yalo, aze alibonise ukubaluleka kokuthanda intsapho yalo, ubomi balo, kwanoThixo—kodwa ikhoboka lotywala aliyeki ukusela. Njengokuba ezama ukulawula indlela elisela ngayo aze oyisakale, uyakhathazeka aze azive engeloncedo. Usenokuba nengxaki yokoyika, umsindo, ukuziva enetyala, engonwabanga, enexhala, yaye engazihloneli.

⁴ Nabantwana bayachatshazelwa kukukhotyokiswa butywala komzali. Bambi benzakaliswa emzimbeni. Abanye bayaxhatshazwa ngokwesini. Basenokude bazibek’ ityala ngokukhotyokiswa butywala komzali lowo. Amaxesha amaninzi bayayeka ukuthemba abanye abantu ngenxa yokuguquguquka kwesimilo sekhoboka lotywala. Kuba bengakwazi ukuthetha ngokukhululekileyo ngoko kwenzeka ekhaya, abantwana basenokufunda ukuzigcina ngaphakathi iimvakalelo zabo, nto leyo edla ngokuba yingozi kubo. (IMizekeliso 17:22) Aba bantwana basenokukhula bengathembi mntu yaye bengazithembanga de babe badala.

YINTONI ENOKWENZIWA YINTSAPHO?

5. Kunokuhlangatyezwana njani nokukhotyokiswa butywala, yaye kutheni oku kunzima?

⁵ Nangona imithombo ethile isithi ukukhotyokiswa butywala akunakunyangeka, inkoliso yayo iyavuma ukuba lingachacha ikhoboka lotywala ukusa kumlinganiselo othile ngokulilumla ngokupheleleyo. (Thelekisa Mateyu 5:29.) Noko ke, kulula ukuthetha ngokuncedwa kwekhoboka lotywala kodwa ukulinceda akuyondlwan’ iyanetha, kuba liyiphika lilale ngomhlana into yokuba linengxaki. Sekunjalo, xa amalungu entsapho esenza amalinge okuhlangabezana neengxaki ezibangelwa kukukhotyokiswa kwalo butywala, ikhoboka lotywala lisenokutsho liqonde ukuba linengxaki. Omnye ugqirha onamava okunceda amakhoboka otywala neentsapho zawo wathi: “Ndicinga ukuba eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuba amalungu entsapho aqhubeke esenza izinto zawo ngendlela eyingenelo kangangoko enako. Ikhoboka lotywala liya kude liyibone indlela elahluke ngayo kwintsapho iphela.”

6. Sifumaneka phi esona siluleko sibalaseleyo seentsapho ezinelungu elilikhoboka lotywala?

⁶ Ukuba kukho ikhoboka lotywala kwintsapho yakho, isiluleko seBhayibhile esiphefumlelweyo sinokukunceda uphile ngendlela eyingenelo kangangoko unako. (Isaya 48:17; 2 Timoti 3:16, 17) Qwalasela eminye imigaqo eye yanceda iintsapho zihlangabezane ngokuphumelelayo nengxaki yokukhotyokiswa butywala.

7. Ukuba ilungu lentsapho lilikhoboka lotywala, ngubani obekek’ ityala?

⁷ Yekani ukuzibeka ityala. IBhayibhile ithi: “Ngamnye uya kuthwala umthwalo wakhe,” yaye, “ngamnye wethu uya kunikela ingxelo kuThixo.” (Galati 6:5; Roma 14:12) Ikhoboka lotywala lisenokuzama ukubek’ ityala amalungu entsapho ngokuthi angunobangela woku. Ngokomzekelo, lisenokuthi: “Ukuba benindiphethe kakuhle, ngendingaseli.” Ukuba kukho ababonakala bevumelana nalo, bayalikhuthaza ukuba liqhubeke lisela. Kodwa enoba siqhutywa ziimeko okanye ngabanye abantu, sonke—kuquka amakhoboka otywala—sibophelelekile ngoko sikwenzayo.—Thelekisa amaFilipi 2:12.

8. Ziziphi ezinye iindlela ikhoboka lotywala elisenokuncedwa ngazo ukuze liyive imiphumo yengxaki?

⁸ Musani ukucinga ukuba nimele nisoloko nilikhusela ikhoboka lotywala xa lisengxakini ngenxa yokusela. Umzekeliso weBhayibhile othetha ngomntu onomsindo unokusetyenziswa ngokufanayo kwikhoboka lotywala: “Xa uthe wamhlangula, woba mandundu.” (IMizekeliso 19:19) Ikhoboka maliyive imiphumo yokusela kwalo. Malizilungise ngokwalo izinto elizonakalisileyo okanye limtsalele umnxeba ngokwalo umqeshi ngentsasa elandela olo suku belinxile ngalo.

9, 10. Kutheni iintsapho zamakhoboka otywala zimele zilwamkele uncedo, yaye luncedo lukabani ngokukhethekileyo ezifanele zilufune?

⁹ Lwamkeleni uncedo lwabanye. IMizekeliso 17:17 ithi: “Umhlobo uthanda ngamaxesha onke; umzalwana uzalelwe imbandezelo.” Xa kukho ikhoboka lotywala kwintsapho yakho, kubakho imbandezelo. Kufuneka uncedwe. Musa ukoyika ukucela uncedo ‘kubahlobo.’ (IMizekeliso 18:24) Ukuthetha nabanye abayiqondayo ingxaki yakho okanye abakhe bakwimeko efanayo basenokukunika amacebiso asebenzisekayo ngoko umele ukwenze nangoko ungamele ukwenze. Kodwa lungelelana. Thetha nabo ubathembayo, abo baya kulugcina “ucweyo.”—IMizekeliso 11:13.

¹⁰ Funda ukukholosa ngabadala abangamaKristu. Abadala kwibandla lamaKristu banokuba luncedo gqitha. La madoda aqolileyo afundiswe iLizwi likaThixo nanamava ekusebenziseni imigaqo yalo. Asenokungqineka ‘enjengendawo yokuzimela umoya, nokusithela esiphangweni; abe njengemijelo yamanzi emqwebedwini, njengomthunzi wengxondorha enkulu ezweni elibharhileyo.’ (Isaya 32:2) Abadala abangamaKristu abaneli nje ukukhusela ibandla kwiimpembelelo eziyingozi kodwa bayalithuthuzela, balihlaziye baze babe nomdla wobuqu kubantu abaneengxaki. Lusebenzise ngokuzeleyo uncedo lwabo.

11, 12. Ngubani onikela olona ncedo lukhulu kwiintsapho ezinekhoboka lotywala, yaye lunikelwa njani olo ncedo?

¹¹ Ngaphezu kweento zonke, fumana amandla kuYehova. IBhayibhile ngobubele isiqinisekisa oku: “Usondele uYehova kwabantliziyo zaphukileyo, abasindise abamoya utyumkileyo.” (INdumiso 34:18) Ukuba uziva waphuke intliziyo okanye utyumkile emoyeni ngenxa yeengcinezelo zokuphila nelungu lentsapho elilikhoboka lotywala, yazi ukuba “usondele uYehova.” Uyayiqonda indlela enzima ngayo imeko yentsapho yakho.—1 Petros 5:6, 7.

¹² Ukukukholelwa oko uYehova akuthethayo eLizwini lakhe kunokukunceda uhlangabezane nexhala. (INdumiso 130:3, 4; Mateyu 6:25-34; 1 Yohane 3:19, 20) Ukufundisisa iLizwi likaThixo nokuphila ngemigaqo yalo kukwenza ukwazi ukufumana uncedo lomoya oyingcwele kaThixo, onokukunika “amandla angaphaya koko kuqhelekileyo” ukuze uhlangabezane nale ngxaki yonke imihla.—2 Korinte 4:7.b

13. Yiyiphi ingxaki yesibini eyonakalisa ubomi beentsapho ezininzi?

¹³ Ukusebenzisa kakubi utywala kunokubangela enye ingxaki eyonakalisa iintsapho ezininzi—ugonyamelo lwasekhaya.

UMONAKALO OBANGELWA LUGONYAMELO LWASEKHAYA

14. Ugonyamelo lwasekhaya lwaqala nini, yaye injani imeko namhlanje?

¹⁴ Ugonyamelo lokuqala kwimbali yoluntu lwalubandakanya abafana ababini abalekelanayo, uKayin noAbheli. (Genesis 4:8) Ukususela ngoko, uluntu beluthwaxwa lugonyamelo lwasekhaya olwahlukahlukeneyo. Amadoda abetha abafazi, abafazi bahlasela amadoda, abazali babetha abantwana babo ngenkohlakalo nabantwana abadala babaphethe kakubi abazali babo abalupheleyo.

15. Amalungu entsapho achatshazelwa njani ngokweemvakalelo lugonyamelo lwasekhaya?

¹⁵ Umonakalo obangelwa lugonyamelo lwasekhaya awupheleli nje kumanxeba asemzimbeni. Omnye umfazi obethwayo wathi: “Uye uzive unetyala ngeyona ndlela yaye unentloni. Amaxesha amaninzi ngentsasa elandelayo, uye ubawele ukulala ungavuki, unethemba lokuba okwenzekileyo ibikukuphupha nje kakubi.” Abantwana ababukela okanye abanengxaki yogonyamelo lwasekhaya basenokuba nogonyamelo xa bekhula yaye beneentsapho zabo.

16, 17. Kukuthini ukuphathwa kakubi ngokweemvakalelo, yaye kwenza ntoni kumalungu entsapho?

¹⁶ Ugonyamelo lwasekhaya aluphelelanga ekwenzakalisweni emzimbeni. Idla ngokuba kukusetyenziswa kwamazwi ahlabayo. IMizekeliso 12:18 ithi: “Kukho ophololoza njengokuhlaba kwekrele.” Oku ‘kuhlaba’ okudla ngokubakho kugonyamelo lwasekhaya kuquka ukuthukwa nokungxoliswa, kunye nokusoloko ugxekwa, izithuko ezithob’ isidima nokusongelwa ngokubethwa ngogonyamelo. Amanxeba ogonyamelo olungokweemvakalelo akabonakali yaye adla ngokungabonwa ngabanye.

¹⁷ Eyona nto ibuhlungu ngakumbi kukuphathwa kakubi komntwana ngokweemvakalelo—ukusoloko egxekwa nokunyemba ubuchule bakhe, ubukrelekrele bakhe okanye ukubaluleka kwakhe njengomntu. Oko kuphathwa kakubi ngamazwi kunokuwutyumza umoya womntwana. Liyinyaniso elokuba, bonke abantwana bayakufuna ukuqeqeshwa. Kodwa iBhayibhile iyalela ootata isithi: “Musani ukubacaphukisa abantwana benu, khon’ ukuze bangafi intliziyo.”—Kolose 3:21.

INDLELA YOKUPHEPHA UGONYAMELO LWASEKHAYA

18. Ugonyamelo lwasekhaya luqala phi, yaye iBhayibhile ithi yiyiphi indlela yokuluphelisa?

¹⁸ Ugonyamelo lwasekhaya luqala entliziyweni nasengqondweni; indlela esizenza ngayo izinto iqala kwindlela esicinga ngayo. (Yakobi 1:14, 15) Ukuze ayeke olo gonyamelo, lowo unempatho-mbi umele aguqule indlela acinga ngayo. (Roma 12:2) Ngaba oko kunokwenzeka? Ewe. ILizwi likaThixo linamandla okuguqula abantu. Linokuncothula ‘izinto ezinqatyiswe ngamandla.’ (2 Korinte 10:4; Hebhere 4:12) Ulwazi oluchanileyo lweBhayibhile lunokubaguqula ngokupheleleyo abantu kangangokuba kuthiwe bambethe ubuntu obutsha.—Efese 4:22-24; Kolose 3:8-10.

19. UmKristu ufanele abe nayiphi imbono yaye aliphathe njani iqabane lomtshato?

¹⁹ Indlela omele ulijonge ngayo iqabane lomtshato. ILizwi likaThixo lithi: “Amadoda afanele abathande abafazi bawo njengemizimba yawo. Lowo umthandayo umfazi wakhe uyazithanda.” (Efese 5:28) Kwakhona iBhayibhile ithi amadoda afanele anike abafazi bawo “imbeko njengesitya esibuthathaka ngakumbi.” (1 Petros 3:7) Abafazi balulekwa ukuba “bawathande amadoda abo” baze bona babe “nentlonelo enzulu” ngawo. (Tito 2:4; Efese 5:33) Ngokuqinisekileyo ayikho indoda eyoyika uThixo enokuzithethelela ngelithi iyambeka ngokwenene umkayo ukuba imphatha kakubi emzimbeni nangamazwi. Yaye akakho umfazi ongxolisa indoda yakhe, ahlekise ngayo, okanye osoloko eyiluthuzelisa onokuthi ngokwenene uyayithanda yaye uyayihlonela.

20. Ngubani abanembopheleleko kuye abazali ngabantwana babo, yaye kutheni abazali bengafanele balindele izinto ezingenakwenzeka kubantwana babo?

²⁰ Imbono efanelekileyo ngabantwana. Ewe, abazali bafanele babathande baze banikele ingqalelo kubantwana babo. ILizwi likaThixo libabiza abantwana ngokuthi ‘lilifa likaYehova’ nangokuthi ‘ngumvuzo.’ (INdumiso 127:3) Abazali banembopheleleko phambi koYehova yokunyamekela elo lifa. IBhayibhile ithetha ‘ngeempawu zosana’ ‘nangokumatha komntwana.’ (1 Korinte 13:11; IMizekeliso 22:15) Abazali abafanele bamangaliswe xa befumanisa ukumatha ebantwaneni babo. Abantwana asingobantu badala. Abazali abafanele bafune izinto ezingabufanelanga ubudala akubo loo mntwana, imvelaphi yaloo ntsapho nobuchule bakhe.—Bona iGenesis 33:12-14.

21. Yiyiphi indlela yobuthixo yokujonga abazali abalupheleyo neyokubaphatha?

²¹ Imbono ngabazali abalupheleyo. ILevitikus 19:32 ithi: “Suka ume ebusweni bengwevu, ububeke ubuso bexhego.” Ngaloo ndlela uMthetho kaThixo wawufuna ukuba abantu abalupheleyo bahlonelwe baze baxatyiswe. Oku kusenokuba lucelomngeni xa umzali owalupheleyo efuna yonk’ into okanye egula yaye mhlawumbi engakwazi kukhawuleza okanye enengqondo ecothayo. Sekunjalo, abantwana bakhunjuzwa ukuba ‘baqhubeke bebahlawula imbuyekezo ebafaneleyo abazali.’ (1 Timoti 5:4) Oku bekuya kuthetha ukubaphatha ngokundileka nangentlonelo, mhlawumbi nangokubaxhasa ngemali. Ukuphatha kakubi abazali ngokwasemzimbeni okanye ngenye indlela kuchasene mpela nendlela iBhayibhile ethi masibaphathe ngayo.

22. Luluphi uphawu olubalaseleyo lokoyisa ugonyamelo lwasekhaya, yaye lunokusetyenziswa njani?

²² Hlakulela ukuzeyisa. IMizekeliso 29:11 ithi: “Isinyabi siya kukhupha konke ukufutha kwaso, ke sona isilumko sikudambisela embilinini yaso.” Unokuwulawula njani umoya wakho? Kunokuvumela ukukhathazeka kwakheke, zilungise ngokukhawuleza iingxaki xa zivela. (Efese 4:26, 27) Ukuba uyaziva ukuba akunakuzibamba hamba kuloo ndawo. Thandazela umoya oyingcwele kaThixo ukuncede ukwazi ukuzeyisa. (Galati 5:22, 23) Ukuphuma ubethwe ngumoya okanye ukwenza umthambo kusenokukunceda uzilawule iimvakalelo zakho. (IMizekeliso 17:14, 27) Zama ‘ukuzeka kade umsindo.’—IMizekeliso 14:29.

NGABA NIMELE NAHLUKANE OKANYE NIQHUBEKE NIHLALA KUNYE?

23. Yintoni enokwenzeka ukuba ilungu lebandla lamaKristu ngokuphindaphindiweyo yaye lingaguquki liyanikezela kumsindo onogonyamelo, mhlawumbi lide liyiphathe kakubi intsapho yalo?

²³ IBhayibhile xa ichaza imisebenzi egwetywayo nguThixo iquka ‘ubutshaba, iimbambano, . . . imisindo’ ize ithi “abo baqhelisela izinto ezinjalo abayi kubudla ilifa ubukumkani bukaThixo.” (Galati 5:19-21) Ngoko ke, nabani na othi ungumKristu onikezela ngokuphindaphindiweyo yaye engaguquki kumsindo onogonyamelo, mhlawumbi ade aliphathe kakubi iqabane lakhe okanye abantwana bakhe, unokususwa kubudlelwane kwibandla lamaKristu. (Thelekisa eyesi-2 kaYohane 9, 10.) Ngale ndlela ibandla ligcinwa licocekile lingenabantu abanempatho-mbi.—1 Korinte 5:6, 7; Galati 5:9.

24. (a) Yintoni asenokukhetha ukuyenza amaqabane aphethwe kakubi? (b) Izihlobo ezixhalabileyo nabadala basenokulixhasa njani iqabane eliphethwe kakubi, kodwa yintoni abangafanele bayenze?

²⁴ Kuthekani ngamaKristu abethwa liqabane elinempatho-mbi elingabonisi nguquko? Wambi aye akhetha ukuhlala nelo qabane linempatho-mbi ngenxa yezizathu ezahlukeneyo. Amanye aye akhetha ukulishiya, kuba evakalelwa kukuba impilo yawo yasemzimbeni, yasengqondweni neyokomoya—mhlawumbi kwanobomi bawo—busengozini. Oko ixhoba logonyamelo lwasekhaya likhetha ukukwenza kusisigqibo salo sobuqu phambi kukaYehova. (1 Korinte 7:10, 11) Izihlobo, izalamane, okanye abadala abangamaKristu basenokunqwenela ukunikela uncedo necebiso, kodwa abafanele banyanzele elo xhoba ukuba lenze okuthile. Konke oko kuxhomekeke kulo.—Roma 14:4; Galati 6:5.

UKUPHELA KWEENGXAKI EZONAKALISAYO

25. Yiyiphi injongo uYehova anayo ngentsapho?

²⁵ Xa uYehova watshatisa uAdam noEva, akazange abe nenjongo yokuba iintsapho zikhathazwe ziingxaki ezonakalisayo njengokukhotyokiswa butywala okanye ugonyamelo. (Efese 3:14, 15) Intsapho yayimele ibe yindawo ekwesamele kuyo uthando noxolo yaye nekunyanyekelwa kuyo iintswelo zengqondo, zeemvakalelo nezokomoya. Noko ke, xa kwangena isono ubomi bentsapho badodobala ngokukhawuleza.—Thelekisa INtshumayeli 8:9.

26. Liliphi ikamva elilindele abo bazama ukuphila ngokuvisisana noko kufunwa nguYehova?

²⁶ Okuvuyisayo kukuba, uYehova akazange ayilibale injongo yakhe ngentsapho. Uthembisa ukuzisa ihlabathi elitsha elinoxolo ekuya kuthi kulo abantu “bahlale bekholosile, kungabikho ubothusayo.” (Hezekile 34:28) Ngelo xesha, ukukhotyokiswa butywala, ugonyamelo lwasekhaya nazo zonke ezinye iingxaki ezonakalisa iintsapho namhlanje ziya kube zingasekho. Abantu baya kuncuma bengafihli loyiko nantlungu abakuyo, kodwa baya kuncunyiswa ‘kukuziyolisa ngobuninzi boxolo.’—INdumiso 37:11.

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

LE MIGAQO YEBHAYIBHILE INGAZINCEDA NJANI . . . IINTSAPHO ZIPHEPHE IINGXAKI EZIYA KUBANGELA UMONAKALO ONZULU?

UYehova uyakugweba ukusetyenziswa kakubi kotywala.—IMizekeliso 23:20, 21.

Mntu ngamnye ubophelelekile ngoko akwenzayo.—Roma 14:12.

Xa singazeyisi asinakumkhonza ngokwamkelekileyo uThixo.—IMizekeliso 29:11.

AmaKristu okwenyaniso ayababeka abazali bawo abakhulileyo.—Levitikus 19:32.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 146]

Abadala abangamaKristu banokuba luncedo ekucombululeni iingxaki zentsapho

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 151]

Amaqabane angamaKristu athandanayo nahlonelanayo aya kuzicombulula ngokukhawuleza iingxaki

Isahluko 13

Xa Umtshato Usecicini Lokuqhekeka

1, 2. Xa umtshato uneengxaki, nguwuphi umbuzo ofanele ubuzwe?

NGOWE-1988 elinye ibhinqa laseItali elinguLucia lalidandatheke kakhulu.a Emva kweminyaka elishumi umtshato walo wawuphela. Amaxesha amaninzi lalizama ukuxolelana nendoda yalo, kodwa lalingaphumeleli. Ngoko lahlukana nayo ngenxa yokungavisisani yaye kwafuneka likhulise amantombazana amabini lilodwa. Xa ekhumbula elo xesha, uLucia ukhumbula oku: “Ndandiqinisekile ukuba yayingekho into enokusindisa umtshato wethu.”

² Ukuba uneengxaki zomtshato, usenokuyiqonda ingxaki awayekuyo uLucia. Umtshato wakho usenokuba uneenkathazo yaye usenokuba uyathandabuza enoba ikho into enokuwusindisa kusini na. Ukuba kunjalo, kuya kukunceda ukucingisisa ngalo mbuzo: Ngaba ndiwalandele onke amacebiso amahle anikelwe nguThixo eBhayibhileni okunceda umtshato uphumelele?—INdumiso 119:105.

3. Nangona uqhawulo-mtshato luxhaphake kangaka, kuthiwa basabela njani abantu abaqhawule umtshato neentsapho zabo?

³ Xa iimeko zimaxongo phakathi kwendoda nomfazi, ukuchitha loo mtshato kusenokubonakala kuyeyona ndlela ilula. Kodwa, ngoxa amazwe amaninzi eneentsapho ezininzi gqitha eziqhekekayo, uhlolisiso lwakutshanje lubonisa ukuba uninzi lwamadoda nabafazi abaqhawule umtshato luyazisola. Inkoliso iba neengxaki zempilo ezingakumbi, emzimbeni nasengqondweni, xa ithelekiswa nabo baqhubeka nemitshato yabo. Abantwana abanabazali abaqhawule umtshato badla ngokudideka baze bangonwabi kangangeminyaka emininzi. Abazali nabahlobo beentsapho eziqhekekileyo nabo bayabandezeleka. Kuthekani ngendlela uThixo, onguMsunguli womtshato, akujonga ngayo oku?

4. Zifanele zisingathwe njani iingxaki emtshatweni?

⁴ Njengokuba kubonisiwe kwizahluko ezandulelayo, uThixo wayenenjongo yokuba umtshato ube lumanyano lobomi bonke. (Genesis 2:24) Ngoko ke, kutheni imitshato emininzi iqhekeka? Isenokuba ayiqhawuki ngesiquphe. Ngokuqhelekileyo kubakho imiqondiso elumkisayo. Iingxaki ezincinane zomtshato zinokukhula zibe nkulu de zibe ngaphaya kwamandla. Kodwa ukuba ezi ngxaki zilungiswa ngokukhawuleza kusetyenziswa iBhayibhile, ukuqhawuka kwemitshato emininzi kunokuphetshwa.

LINDELA IZINTO EZISENGQIQWENI

5. Yiyiphi imeko ngokwenene ekumele kujanyelwane nayo kuyo yonke imitshato?

⁵ Enye into edla ngokubangela iingxaki kukuba elinye iqabane okanye omabini alindele izinto ezingekho ngqiqweni. Iincwadi zamabali othando, amaphephancwadi athandwayo, iinkqubo zikamabonwakude nemifanekiso eshukumayo inokubangela amathemba namaphupha angenakuze azaliseke kubomi bokwenene. Xa la maphupha engazaliseki, umntu uziva eqhathiwe, enganelisekanga, ade abe nengqumbo. Noko ke, abantu ababini abangafezekanga banokulufumana njani ulonwabo emtshatweni? Ukwakha ulwalamano oluphumelelayo akuyondlwan’ iyanetha.

6. (a) Yiyiphi imbono elungeleleneyo enikelwa yiBhayibhile? (b) Ziziphi ezinye izinto ezibangela ukungavisisani emtshatweni?

⁶ IBhayibhile iluncedo kulo mba. Iyavuma ukuba umtshato uyavuyisa, kodwa ikwalumkisa nangelokuba abo batshatayo “baya kuba nembandezelo enyameni yabo.” (1 Korinte 7:28) Njengokuba sele siphawulile, omabini amaqabane akafezekanga yaye atyekele ekoneni. Iimvakalelo nengqondo yeqabane ngalinye yahlukile. Maxa wambi amaqabane asenokungavisisani ngemali, ngabantwana nangezalamane. Ukungabi naxesha lokwenza izinto kunye neengxaki ezingemibandela yesini nazo zisenokudala ungquzulwano.b Kufuna ixesha ukucombulula ezo ngxaki, kodwa zimisele! Izibini ezininzi ezitshatileyo ziyakwazi ukumelana nezo ngxaki zize zifumane izicombululo ezifanelekileyo.

KUXUBUSHENI UKUNGAVISISANI

7, 8. Ukuba amaqabane omtshato akonwabanga okanye akavisisani, yiyiphi indlela engokweZibhalo yokusingatha oko?

⁷ Abaninzi bakufumanisa kunzima ukuhlala bezolile xa bexubusha izinto ezibakhathazayo, ukungaqondani, okanye iintsilelo zobuqu. Kunokuchaza ngokungqalileyo lithi: “Ndicinga ukuba akunalwazelelelo,” iqabane lisenokusuka licaphuke liyenze nkulu ngakumbi loo ngxaki. Abaninzi badla ngokuthi: “Wena ujonge isiqu sakho kuphela,” okanye “Akundithandi.” Kuba lingafuni kuxambulisana, elinye iqabane lisenokusuka lizithulele.

⁸ Elona khondo unokulilandela kukuthobela esi siluleko seBhayibhile: “Qumbani, ukanti ningoni; malingatshoni ilanga nikwimo yokucaphuka.” (Efese 4:26) Esinye isibini esinomtshato owonwabisayo, xa sasigqiba iminyaka engama-60 sitshatile, sabuzwa imfihlelo yokuphumelela komtshato waso. Indoda yathi: “Safunda ukuba singaze silale singakulungisanga ukungavisisani, kungakhathaliseki ukuba kuncinane kangakanani na.”

9. (a) Yiyiphi inxalenye ebalulekileyo yonxibelelwano echazwe eZibhalweni? (b) Yintoni ekusoloko kufuneka eyenzile amaqabane omtshato, nangona oko kufuna inkalipho nokuthobeka?

⁹ Xa indoda nomfazi bengavisisani, ngamnye kufuneka “akhawuleze ukuva, acothe ukuthetha, acothe ukuqumba.” (Yakobi 1:19) Akuba ephulaphule ngenyameko, omabini amaqabane asenokubona imfuneko yokucela uxolo. (Yakobi 5:16) Kufuna ukuthobeka nenkalipho ukuthi ngokunyanisekileyo, “Uxolo ngokukukhathaza.” Kodwa ukulungisa ukungavisisani ngolu hlobo kuya kuzinceda ngeyona ndlela izibini ezitshatileyo ekucombululeni iingxaki zazo kuze kukhulise ububele nokusondelelana okuya kuzenza zonwatyiswe ngakumbi kukuba kunye.

UKUNIKELA IMFANELO YOMTSHATO

10. Yiyiphi indlela yokukhusela eyanconyelwa nguPawulos kumaKristu aseKorinte esenokusebenza kumKristu namhlanje?

¹⁰ Xa umpostile uPawulos wayebhalela abaseKorinte, wancomela umtshato ‘ngenxa yokuxhaphaka kohenyuzo.’ (1 Korinte 7:2) Ihlabathi namhlanje libi ngokufanayo, okanye nangaphezulu, kuneKorinte yamandulo. Imibandela yokuziphatha okubi abancokola ngayo ngokukhululekileyo abantu, indlela engandilisekanga yokunxiba, namabali angcolileyo akumaphephancwadi neencwadi, kumabonwakude, nakwimifanekiso eshukumayo, zonke ezi zinto zikhuthaza iinkanuko zesini. Ethetha nabaseKorinte ababephila kwimeko efanayo, umpostile uPawulos wathi: “Kulunge ngakumbi ukutshata kunokutshiseka yinkanuko.”—1 Korinte 7:9.

11, 12. (a) Yiyiphi imfanelo amadoda nabafazi abafanele banikane yona, yaye bafanele banikane ngomoya onjani? (b) Imele isingathwe njani imeko yaxa kufuneka kubandezwane imfanelo yomtshato?

¹¹ Ngenxa yoko, iBhayibhile iyala amaKristu atshatileyo isithi: “Indoda mayinike umfazi wayo okumfaneleyo; kodwa nomfazi makenze ngokunjalo endodeni yakhe.” (1 Korinte 7:3) Phawula ukuba apha kugxininiswa ukunika—kungekhona ukufuna. Ukuba neentlobano zesini emtshatweni kwanelisa ngokwenene xa ilungu ngalinye likhathalele ukulungelwa kwelinye. Ngokomzekelo, iBhayibhile iyala amadoda ukuba abaphathe abafazi bawo “ngokokwazi.” (1 Petros 3:7) Oku kusebenza ngokwenene xa kunikelwa kuze kwamkelwe oko kuyimfanelo emtshatweni. Ukuba umfazi akathantanyiswa, usenokukufumanisa kunzima ukukunandipha oku emtshatweni.

¹² Kubakho amaxesha apho amaqabane omtshato aye abandezane imfanelo yomtshato. Oku kusenokwenziwa ngumfazi ngamaxesha athile enyanga okanye xa eziva edinwe gqitha. (Thelekisa iLevitikus 18:19.) Indoda isenokukwenza oku xa inengxaki enkulu emsebenzini yaye umoya wayo uphantsi. Loo mathutyana okubandezana imfanelo yomtshato asingathwa kakuhle xa amaqabane omabini eyixubusha ngokuphandle le meko aze ‘avumelane.’ (1 Korinte 7:5) Oku kuya kuthintela ukuba kungabikho qabane lifikelela kwizigqibo eziphosakeleyo. Noko ke, ukuba umfazi uyibandeza ngabom indoda yakhe okanye ukuba indoda isilela ngabom ukunika umfazi wayo imfanelo yomtshato ngendlela enothando, elinye iqabane lisenokushiyeka lisesichengeni sokulingeka. Kwimeko enjalo, kusenokuvela iingxaki emtshatweni.

13. AmaKristu angazama njani ukugcina ukucinga kwawo kucocekile?

¹³ Njengawo onke amaKristu, abakhonzi bakaThixo abatshatileyo bamele baphephe izinto ezibonisa imifanekiso engamanyala, enokuvusa iminqweno engcolileyo nengafanelekanga. (Kolose 3:5) Kwakhona bamele balumkele iingcinga nezenzo zabo xa beqhubana nabantu besini esahlukileyo. UYesu walumkisa wathi: “Wonk’ ubani othi gqolo ekhangela umfazi khon’ ukuze abe nenkanuko ngaye sele ekrexezile naye entliziyweni yakhe.” (Mateyu 5:28) Xa zisebenzisa isiluleko seBhayibhile esingemibandela yesini, izibini zifanele zikwazi ukuphepha izilingo nokukrexeza. Zinokuqhubeka zinandipha oko kusondelelana kuyolisayo emtshatweni ekuthi kuwo isini sixatyiswe njengesipho esifanelekileyo soMsunguli womtshato, uYehova.—IMizekeliso 5:15-19.

IZIZATHU EZINGOKWEZIBHALO ZOKUQHAWULA UMTSHATO

14. Yiyiphi imeko elusizi edla ngokubakho maxa wambi? Ngoba?

¹⁴ Okuvuyisayo kukuba, kwimitshato emininzi yamaKristu, naziphi na iingxaki ezivelayo zinokusingathwa. Noko ke, maxa wambi oku akwenzeki. Kuba abantu bengafezekanga yaye bephila kwihlabathi elinesono elilawulwa nguSathana, eminye imitshato iba secicini lokuqhekeka. (1 Yohane 5:19) AmaKristu afanele azisingathe njani ezo meko zivavanyayo?

15. (a) Sisiphi ekuphela kwesizathu esingokweZibhalo sokuqhawula umtshato ukuze ukwazi ukuphinda utshate? (b) Kutheni abanye beye bagqiba kwelokuba bangawuqhawuli umtshato neqabane elingathembekanga?

¹⁵ Njengokuba kukhankanyiwe kwiSahluko 2 sale ncwadi, uhenyuzo kuphela kwesizathu esingokweZibhalo sokuqhawula umtshato uze ukwazi ukuphinda utshate.c (Mateyu 19:9) Ukuba unobungqina obubambekayo bokuba iqabane lakho liye alathembeka, ngoko ujongene nesigqibo esinzima. Ngaba uza kuqhubeka utshate nalo okanye uza kuwuqhawula umtshato? Akukho migaqo inikelweyo koko. Wambi amaKristu aye awaxolela ngokupheleleyo amaqabane awo, yaye imitshato yawo yaphumelela. Amanye aye agqiba kwelokuba angawuqhawuli umtshato ngenxa yabantwana.

16. (a) Ziziphi ezinye izinto ezibangele abanye bawuqhawula umtshato neqabane lomtshato elonileyo? (b) Xa iqabane elimsulwa lisenza isigqibo sokuqhawula umtshato okanye sokungawuqhawuli, kutheni kungekho mntu ufanele asigxeke eso sigqibo?

¹⁶ Kwelinye icala, eso sono sisenokuphumela ekukhulelweni okanye kwisifo esidluliselwa ngeentlobano zesini. Okanye mhlawumbi kusenokufuneka abantwana bakhuselwe kumzali oxhaphaza abantwana ngokwesini. Licacile elokuba, kuninzi ekufuneka ukucingile ngaphambi kokuba wenze isigqibo. Noko ke, ukuba ufumanisa ukuba iqabane lakho liye alathembeka waza emva koko waneentlobano zesini nalo ubonisa ukuba ulixolele iqabane lakho yaye unqwenela ukuqhubeka utshatile nalo. Akusenazizathu zingokweZibhalo zokuqhawula umtshato uze ukwazi ukuphinda utshate. Akukho mntu ufanele agxuphuleke okanye azame ukukuphembelela kwisigqibo osenzayo, yaye akufanele kubekho mntu ukugxekayo ngesigqibo osenzayo. Nguwe oza kujamelana nemiphumo yesigqibo osenzayo. “Ngamnye uya kuthwala umthwalo wakhe.”—Galati 6:5.

IZIZATHU ZOKWAHLUKANA

17. Ukuba alihenyuzanga, yiyiphi eminye imida ebekwa ziZibhalo ngokwahlukana okanye ngokuqhawula umtshato?

¹⁷ Ngaba zikho iimeko ezinokuthethelela ukwahlukana okanye mhlawumbi ukuqhawula umtshato neqabane lakho nokuba alihenyuzanga? Ewe, kodwa kwimeko enjalo, umKristu akanalungelo lakufuna omnye umntu ukuze amtshate. (Mateyu 5:32) IBhayibhile, nangona ikuvumela ukwahlukana okunjalo, ithi lowo umkayo ufanele “ahlale engatshatanga okanye kungenjalo axolelane.” (1 Korinte 7:11) Ziziphi ezinye iimeko ezigabadeleyo ezinokwenza kubonakale kucebiseka ukwahlukana?

18, 19. Ziziphi ezinye iimeko ezigabadeleyo ezinokubangela elinye iqabane licinge ngokwahlukana okusemthethweni okanye uqhawulo-mtshato, nangona lingenakukwazi ukuphinda litshate?

¹⁸ Kaloku, intsapho isenokutsala nzima ngenxa yobuvila nemikhwa emibi yendoda.d Isenokungcakaza ngemali yentsapho okanye iyisebenzisele ukuxhasa ukukhotyokiswa ziziyobisi okanye butywala. IBhayibhile ithi: “Ukuba nabani na akabalungiseleli . . . abo bangamalungu endlu yakhe, ulukhanyele ukholo kwaye mbi ngakumbi kunomntu ongenalo ukholo.” (1 Timoti 5:8) Ukuba loo mntu akafuni kuguquka kwiindlela zakhe, mhlawumbi ade athabathe imali yomkakhe ukuxhasa le mikhwa yakhe mibi, umfazi usenokukhetha ukukhusela impilo-ntle yakhe neyabantwana bakhe ngokwahlukana naye ngokusemthethweni.

¹⁹ Eso senzo singokwasemthethweni kunokucingwa ngaso xa iqabane linogonyamelo olugqithiseleyo kwelinye, mhlawumbi lilibetha ngokuphindaphindiweyo kangangokuba impilo nobomi balo bude bube sengozini. Ukongezelela koko, ukuba iqabane lisoloko lizama ukunyanzelisa iqabane lalo lomtshato ukuba laphule umthetho kaThixo ngandlel’ ithile, elo qabane lisongelwayo nalo lisenokucinga ngokwahlukana, ngokukodwa ukuba iimeko zifikelela kwinqanaba apho ubomi balo bokomoya busengozini. Iqabane elisengozini lisenokugqiba kwelokuba ekuphela kwendlela ‘yokuthobela uThixo njengomphathi kunabantu’ kukwahlukana nalo ngokusemthethweni.—IZenzo 5:29.

20. (a) Kwimeko yokuqhekeka kwentsapho, yintoni abahlobo abaqolileyo okanye abadala abanokuyinikela, yaye yintoni abangafanele bayinikele? (b) Abantu abatshatileyo abafanele basebenzise oko kuthethwa yiBhayibhile ngokwahlukana okanye ukuqhawula umtshato njengesingxengxezo sokwenza ntoni?

²⁰ Kuzo zonke iimeko zeqabane elinempatho-mbi egabadeleyo, akakho ofanele anyanzele iqabane elimsulwa ukuba lahlukane okanye lihlale neqabane lalo. Nangona abahlobo abaqolileyo nabadala besenokunikela uncedo nesiluleko esisekelwe eBhayibhileni, basenokuba abazazi zonke iinkcukacha zoko kwenzekayo phakathi kwaloo ndoda nomfazi wayo. NguYehova kuphela onokukubona oko. Kakade ke, umfazi ongumKristu ebengayi kuba uyamhlonela uThixo nelungiselelo lomtshato ukuba usebenzisa izingxengxezo ezingacacanga zokushiya iqabane lakhe. Kodwa ukuba kukho imeko eyingozi ngokugqithiseleyo ezingisileyo, akakho ofanele amgxeke xa ekhetha ukwahlukana neqabane lakhe. Kukwanjalo nangendoda engumKristu ekhetha ukwahlukana neqabane layo. “Sonke siya kuma phambi kwesihlalo sokugweba sikaThixo.”—Roma 14:10.

INDLELA OWASINDISWA NGAYO UMTSHATO OWAWUQHEKEKILE

21. Ngawaphi amava abonisa ukuba isiluleko seBhayibhile siyasebenza emtshatweni?

²¹ Kwiinyanga ezintathu emva kokuba uLucia, okhankanywe ekuqaleni, ohlukene nendoda yakhe, wadibana namaNgqina kaYehova waza waqalisa isifundo seBhayibhile nawo. Uthi: “Okumangalisayo kukuba, iBhayibhile yandinika zonke izicombululo zengxaki endandinayo. Emva kweveki ndifundisisa, ngoko nangoko ndafuna ukuxolelana nendoda yam. Namhlanje ndingatsho ukuba uYehova uyayazi indlela yokusindisa imitshato kumanqam ngenxa yokuba iimfundiso zakhe zinceda amaqabane afunde indlela yokuxabisana. Aliyonyaniso elokuba amaNgqina kaYehova ahlula iintsapho, njengokuba abanye besitsho. Kwimeko yam, kwenzeka okwahlukileyo koko.” ULucia wafunda ukusebenzisa imigaqo yeBhayibhile kubomi bakhe.

22. Yintoni ezifanele zibe nentembelo kuyo zonke izibini ezitshatileyo?

²² Oku akuzange kwenzeke kuLucia kuphela. Umtshato ufanele ube yintsikelelo ungabi loxanduva. Ngenxa yoko, uYehova usinike eyona ncwadi ibalaseleyo kwezakha zabhalwa—iLizwi lakhe elixabisekileyo. IBhayibhile inika “isiyatha ubulumko.” (INdumiso 19:7-11) Iye yasindisa imitshato emininzi ebisecicini lokuqhekeka yaza yaphucula neminye emininzi ebineengxaki ezinzulu. Ngamana zonke izibini ezitshatileyo zinganentembelo ngokupheleleyo kwisiluleko somtshato esisinikwe nguYehova uThixo. Sisebenza ngokwenene!

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

LE MIGAQO YEBHAYIBHILE INGASINCEDA NJANI . . . SIPHEPHE UKUQHEKEKA KOMTSHATO?

Umtshato uzisa uvuyo nembandezelo.—IMizekeliso 5:18, 19; 1 Korinte 7:28.

Ukungavisisani kufanele kusingathwe ngokukhawuleza.—Efese 4:26.

Kwingxubusho, ukuphulaphula kubaluleke ngokufanayo nokuthetha.—Yakobi 1:19.

Imfanelo yomtshato ifanele inikelwe ngomoya wokungazingci nowokuthantamisa.—1 Korinte 7:3-5.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 154]

Zisingatheni ngokukhawuleza iingxaki. Musani ukuvumela ilanga litshone nicaphukile

Isahluko 14

Ukukhula Kunye Nimanyene

1, 2. (a) Ziziphi iinguqulelo ezenzekayo njengokuba usaluphala? (b) Amadoda ahlonela uThixo amaxesha okubhalwa kweBhayibhile aneliseka njani ekwaluphaleni?

LUNINZI utshintsho olwenzekayo njengokuba sikhula. Amandla ethu ayancipha ngenxa yobuthathaka bemizimba yethu. Xa sizijonga esipilini sibona imibimbi neenwele eseziqalisa ukuxuba—kwanokuqalisa kwempandla. Sisenokuba nengxaki yokulibala. Siqalisa ukuba nolwalamano olutsha njengokuba abantwana betshata, naxa kuzalwa abazukulwana. Kwabanye, ukufumana umhlala-phantsi emsebenzini kubutshintsha bonke ubomi babo.

² Liyinyaniso elokuba, ukukhula ngeminyaka kunokuba luvavanyo. (INtshumayeli 12:1-8) Sekunjalo, cinga ngabakhonzi bakaThixo bamaxesha okubhalwa kweBhayibhile. Nangona bafayo ekugqibeleni, bazuza ubulumko nokuqonda, okwabazisela ulwaneliseko ebudaleni. (Genesis 25:8; 35:29; Yobhi 12:12; 42:17) Baphumelela njani ukuze baluphale bonwabile? Ngokuqinisekileyo yayikukuphila ngokuvisisana nemigaqo thina namhlanje esiyifumana ibhalwe eBhayibhileni.—INdumiso 119:105; 2 Timoti 3:16, 17.

3. Sisiphi isiluleko esanikelwa nguPawulos kumadoda namabhinqa akhulileyo?

³ Kwincwadi yakhe eya kuTito, umpostile uPawulos wanikela ukhokelo olusengqiqweni kwabo babesaluphala. Wabhala: “Amadoda awalupheleyo makabe ngcathu ngokwemikhwa, andileke, abe ngaphilileyo engqondweni, aphile elukholweni, eluthandweni, ekunyamezeleni. Ngokunjalo abafazi abalupheleyo mabaziphathe ngokuhlonel’ uThixo, bangajindi, bangakhotyokiswa nayiwayini eninzi, babe ngabafundisi boko kulungileyo.” (Tito 2:2, 3) Ukuthobela la mazwi kunokukunceda ujamelane nocelomngeni lokwaluphala.

YIBA BHETYEBHETYE XA ABANTWANA BAKHO BEZIMELA GEQE

4, 5. Abazali abaninzi basabela njani xa abantwana babo beshiya ikhaya, yaye abanye bayamkela njani loo meko intsha?

⁴ Ukutshintsha kwendima yethu kufuna sibe bhetyebhetye. Hayi indlela ekuyinyaniso ngayo oku xa abantwana abakhulileyo beshiya ikhaya baze batshate! Le iba yinto yokuqala ekhumbuza abazali abaninzi ukuba bayaluphala. Nangona bevuyiswa kukukhula kwabantwana babo, abazali badla ngokuxhaliswa kukungaqiniseki enokuba bakwenzile kusini na konke okusemandleni abo ukuxhobisela abantwana babo ukuzimela geqe. Yaye basenokubakhumbula gqitha.

⁵ Kuyaqondakala ukuba, abazali bayaqhubeka bezikhathaza ngempilo-ntle yabantwana babo, kwanaxa bengasekho ekhaya. Omnye umama wathi: “Ukuba ndingasoloko ndinxibelelana nabo, ukuze ndiqiniseke ukuba baphilile—oko kungandonwabisa gqitha.” Omnye utata ubalisa oku: “Xa intombi yethu yashiya ikhaya, kwakunzima gqitha. Sasivakala isikhewu sayo kuba sasisoloko sisenza izinto kunye.” Aba bazali baye bahlangabezana njani nokushiywa ngabantwana babo? Kwiimeko ezininzi, bazixakekisa ngokunceda abanye abantu.

6. Yintoni encedayo ukugcina ulwalamano lwentsapho lufanelekile?

⁶ Xa abantwana betshata, indima yabazali iyatshintsha. IGenesis 2:24 ithi: “Indoda yomshiya uyise nonina, inamathele kumkayo, babe nyama-nye ke.” (Akekeliswe sithi.) Ukuhlonela imigaqo yobuthixo yobuntloko nokuba nocwangco kuya kubanceda abazali benze izinto ngendlela efanelekileyo.—1 Korinte 11:3; 14:33, 40.

7. Sisiphi isimo sengqondo esifanelekileyo omnye utata awasihlakulelayo xa iintombi zakhe zashiya ikhaya ukuze zitshate?

⁷ Xa iintombi ezimbini zesinye isibini zatshatayo zaza zasishiya, eso sibini sasiva eso sikhewu kubomi baso. Ekuqaleni, indoda yabaqumbela abakhwenyana bayo. Kodwa xa yacinga ngomgaqo wobuntloko, yaqonda ukuba abayeni beentombi zayo babethwele iimbopheleleko zemizi yabo. Ngoko ke, xa iintombi zayo zazicela icebiso, yayibuza uluvo lwamadoda azo, ize iqinisekise ukuba iwaxhasa ngokwenene. Abakhwenyana bayo ngoku bayijonga njengomhlobo yaye bayalamkela icebiso layo.

8, 9. Abanye abazali baziqhelanisa njani nemeko yokuzimela geqe kwabantwana babo abakhulileyo?

⁸ Kuthekani ukuba aba basandul’ ukutshata, izinto abazenzayo aziphosakele ngokwezibhalo, kodwa abenzi izinto abazali babo abacinga ukuba zezona zilungileyo? Esinye isibini esinabantwana abatshatileyo sicacisa oku: “Sisoloko sibanceda babone imbono kaYehova, kodwa ukuba asivumelani nesigqibo sabo, siyasamkela size sibaxhase size sibakhuthaze.”

⁹ Kwamanye amazwe aseAsia, abanye oomama bakufumanisa kunzima gqitha ukwamkela ukuzimela koonyana babo. Noko ke, ukuba bahlonela umyalelo wobuKristu nobuntloko, bafumanisa ukuba abaxabani kangako noomolokazana babo. Omnye umfazi ongumKristu ufumanisa ukuba ukuhamba koonyana bakhe entsatsheni “kumenza abe nombulelo ongapheliyo.” Kuyamchukumisa ukubona ubuchule babo bokunyamekela iintsapho zabo ezintsha. Kwelinye icala, oku kuthetha ukuba uphungulekile umthwalo wasenyameni nasengqondweni abebewuthwele nendoda yakhe njengokuba bekhula.

UKOMELEZA AMAQHINA ENU OMTSHATO

10, 11. Sisiphi isiluleko esingokweZibhalo esiya kunceda abantu baphephe eminye imigibe yeminyaka yobuqina?

¹⁰ Abantu basabela ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo xa besiba ngamaqina. Amanye amadoda atshintsha isinxibo ezama ukubonakala emancinane. Amabhinqa amaninzi akhathazwa ziinguqulelo ezibangelwa kukuyeka ukuya exesheni. Okulusizi kukuba, abanye abantu abangamaqina bawenza abe nengqumbo nekhwele amaqabane abo ngokubanokalisa umdla wothando kubantu abaselula besini esahlukileyo. Noko ke, amadoda akhulileyo ahlonela uThixo, ‘aphilileyo engqondweni,’ ayayiphepha iminqweno engafanelekanga. (1 Petros 4:7) Ngokufanayo namabhinqa aqolileyo asebenzela ukulondoloza ukuzinza kwemitshato yawo, kuba ewathanda amadoda awo yaye enqwenela ukukholisa uYehova.

¹¹ Ephefumlelwe, uKumkani uLemuweli wabhala amazwi okudumisa ‘umfazi onesidima’ obuyekeza indoda yakhe ‘ngokuyiphatha kakuhle, kungabi kakubi, yonke imihla yobomi bakhe.’ (Akekeliswe sithi.) Indoda engumKristu imele iyixabise indlela umfazi wayo ahlangabezana ngayo nako konke ukuphazamiseka ngokweemvakalelo abanako xa ekwiminyaka yobuqina. Uthando lwayo luya kuyishukumisela ukuba ‘imdumise.’—IMizekeliso 31:10, 12, 28.

12. Izibini zinokukhula njani zimanyene njengokuba iminyaka ihamba?

¹² Ebudeni beminyaka yokuxakeka nikhulisa abantwana, nobabini naye ngovuyo nayibekela ecaleni iminqweno yobuqu naza nanikela ingqalelo kwiintswelo zabantwana benu. Xa bemkile lixesha lokuba niphinde ninikele ingqalelo kubomi benu bomtshato. Enye indoda ithi: “Xa iintombi zam zalishiyayo ikhaya, ndaqala phantsi ukuthandana nomkam.” Enye indoda ithi: “Ngamnye wethu uyazikhathaza ngempilo yomnye yaye siyakhumbuzana ngemfuneko yokwenza umthambo.” Ngoko ukuze bangabi nesithukuthezi, le ndoda nomfazi wayo bamema amanye amalungu ebandla abatyelele kwikhaya labo. Ewe, ukubonisa umdla kwabanye kuzisa iintsikelelo. Ngaphezu koko, kuyamkholisa uYehova.—Filipi 2:4; Hebhere 13:2, 16.

13. Kunayiphi indima ukukhululeka nokunyaniseka njengokuba isibini sikhula kunye simanyene?

¹³ Musa ukuvumela ukunxibelelana neqabane lakho kuphele. Ncokolani ngokukhululekileyo. (IMizekeliso 17:27) Enye indoda igqabaza isithi: “Sizama ukuqondana ngakumbi ngokunyamekelana nokuba nolwazelelelo.” Umkayo uyavuma esithi: “Njengokuba sesikhulile, siyakuvuyela ukuphunga iti kunye, ukuncokola nokusebenzisana.” Ukukhululeka nokunyaniseka kwenu kungalomeleza umanyano lwenu lomtshato, kulwenze lomelele lungoyiswa ziintlaselo zikaSathana, ongumqhekezi wemitshato.

KUNANDIPHENI UKUBA KUNYE NABAZUKULWANA BENU

14. UTimoti kubonakala ukuba wancedwa njani nguninakhulu wakhula engumKristu?

¹⁴ Abazukulwana ‘basisithsaba’ sokwaluphala. (IMizekeliso 17:6) Ukuba kunye nabazukulwana kunokuyolisa ngokwenene—kunokonwabisa yaye kuhlaziye. IBhayibhile iyamncoma uLoyisi, umakhulu owathi, yena nentombi yakhe uYunike, wafundisa umzukulwana wakhe olusana onguTimoti iinkolelo zakhe. Lo mfana wakhula esazi ukuba unina noninakhulu babeyixabisa inyaniso yeBhayibhile.—2 Timoti 1:5; 3:14, 15.

15. Ngokuphathelele abazukulwana, luluphi uncedo olunokunikelwa ngoomakhulu nootatomkhulu, kodwa yintoni abafanele bayiphephe?

¹⁵ Ngoko, nantsi inkalo oomakhulu nootatomkhulu abanokuba luncedo ngokwenene kuyo. Boomakhulu nootatomkhulu, sele nibafundisile abantwana benu ukwazi iinjongo zikaYehova. Ngoko ninokwenza okufanayo nakwisizukulwana esilandelayo! Abantwana abaninzi abaselula kuyabachulumancisa ukuva oomakhulu nootatomkhulu bebalisa amabali eBhayibhile. Kakade ke, aniyithabatheli kuni imbopheleleko katata yokubethelela iinyaniso zeBhayibhile kubantwana bakhe. (Duteronomi 6:7) Kunoko, niyongezelela kuyo. Ngamana ningathandaza ngokufanayo nomdumisi owathi: “Thixo, musa ukundishiya kude kuye ebuxhegweni nasezimvini; ndide ndiyixele ingalo yakho kwisizukulwana esitsha, nobugorha bakho kubo bonke abaya kuza.”—INdumiso 71:18; 78:5, 6.

16. Oomakhulu nootatomkhulu banokukuphepha njani ukubangela ingxabano kwintsapho yabo?

¹⁶ Okulusizi kukuba, abanye oomakhulu nootatomkhulu babatefisa gqitha abazukulwana babo kangangokuba bade baxabane nabantwana babo abakhulileyo. Noko ke, mhlawumbi ububele benu obunyanisekileyo busenokwenza kube lula ngabazukulwana benu ukuzityand’ igila kuni ukuba abaziva bekhululekile ukuchazela abazali babo izinto. Maxa wambi abaselula baye babe nethemba lokuba oomakhulu nootatomkhulu babo abaqondayo baya kubathethelela kubazali babo. Nimele nenze ntoni? Sebenzisani ubulumko nize nikhuthaze abazukulwana benu bathethe ngokukhululekileyo nabazali babo. Nisenokubacacisela ukuba oku kuyamkholisa uYehova. (Efese 6:1-3) Ukuba kunokwenzeka, nisenokumvulela indlela lowo uselula ngokuthetha nabazali bakhe. Bachazeleni ngokuphandle abazukulwana benu ngoko nikufundileyo ebudeni beminyaka. Ukunyaniseka nokungqala kwenu kunokubanceda.

YENZANI UHLENGAHLENGISO NJENGOKUBA NIKHULA

17. Kukuphi ukuzimisela komdumisi amaKristu aluphalayo afanele akuxelise?

¹⁷ Njengokuba iminyaka ihamba, niya kufumanisa ukuba anisakwazi ukwenza konke ebenikade nikwenza okanye konke eninqwenela ukukwenza. Yiyiphi indlela umntu ahlangabezana ngayo nokwaluphala? Engqondweni yakho usenokucinga ukuba useneminyaka engama-30 ubudala, kodwa ukuzikrwaqula esipilini kukuxelela enye into. Musa ukuphoxeka. Umdumisi wabongoza uYehova wathi: “Musa ukundilahla ngexesha lobuxhego; musa ukundishiya akuphela amandla am.” Zimisele ukukuxelisa ukuzimisela komdumisi. Wathi: “Ke mna ndiya kuhlala ndilindile, ndongeze endumisweni yakho yonke.”—INdumiso 71:9, 14.

18. UmKristu oqolileyo unokulisebenzisa ngokuyingenelo njani ixesha lokudla umhlala-phantsi?

¹⁸ Abaninzi baye bakulungiselela kusengaphambili ukwandisa indumiso yabo kuYehova bakuba befumene umhlala-phantsi emsebenzini. Omnye utata odla umhlala-phantsi uthi: “Ndakuceba kusengaphambili endandiya kukwenza xa intombi yethu igqibile esikolweni. Ndazimisela ukuba ndiya kuqalisa ubulungiseleli bexesha elizeleyo, yaye ndathengisa ishishini lam ukuze ndikwazi ukukhonza uYehova ngakumbi. Ndathandazela ukhokelo lukaThixo.” Ukuba sele usondela kwiminyaka yokudla umhlala-phantsi, thuthuzelwa koko kwavakaliswa nguMdali Ozukileyo: “Kude kuse ebudaleni ikwandim, kude kuse ezimvini ndiya kunityatha emagxeni mna.”—Isaya 46:4.

19. Sisiphi isiluleko esinikelwa kwabo baluphalayo?

¹⁹ Ukuziqhelanisa nemeko yokudla umhlala-phantsi emsebenzini akulula. Umpostile uPawulos waluleka amadoda akhulileyo ukuba abe “ngcathu ngokwemikhwa.” Oku kufuna ukuzeyisa, ukunganikezeli kutyekelo lokufuna ubomi obutofotofo. Kusenokufuneka ube nocwangciso uze uziqeqeshe ngakumbi kunangaphambili xa usidla umhlala-phantsi. Ngoko, xakeka ‘usoloko unokuninzi kokwenza emsebenzini weNkosi, usazi ukuba ukubulaleka kwakho akulolize ngokunxibelelene neNkosi.’ (1 Korinte 15:58) Yiba banzi kwizinto ozenzayo ukuze uncede abanye. (2 Korinte 6:13) AmaKristu amaninzi akwenza oku ngokushumayela iindaba ezilungileyo ngenzondelelo ngokuvisisana nobudala bawo. Njengokuba ukhula, ‘phila elukholweni, eluthandweni, nasekunyamezeleni.’—Tito 2:2.

UKUSINGATHA IMEKO YOKUPHULUKANA NEQABANE LAKHO

20, 21. (a) Kule nkqubo yezinto ikhoyo, ekugqibeleni yintoni emele yahlule izibini ezitshatileyo? (b) UAna ungumzekelo omhle njani kumaqabane asentlungwini yokufelwa?

²⁰ Kuyinyaniso nangona kubuhlungu ukuba kule nkqubo yezinto, izibini ezitshatileyo ekugqibeleni zahlulwa kukufa. Amaqabane angamaKristu afelweyo ayazi ukuba abo abathandayo balele, yaye anentembelo yokuba aya kubabona kwakhona. (Yohane 11:11, 25) Kodwa sekunjalo abuhlungu kukuphulukana nawo. Lingahlangabezana njani naloo meko eli lisaphilayo?a

²¹ Ukukhumbula oko kwenziwa ngomnye umntu ekuthethwa ngaye eBhayibhileni kuya kukunceda. UAna waba ngumhlolokazi kwisithuba seminyaka esixhenxe etshatile, yaye xa sifunda ngaye, wayeneminyaka engama-84 ubudala. Sinokuqiniseka ukuba waba buhlungu xa waphulukana nendoda yakhe. Wahlangabezana njani nale meko? Wayenikela inkonzo engcwele kuYehova uThixo etempileni imini nobusuku. (Luka 2:36-38) Ngokuqinisekileyo into eyanceda uAna kuloo ntlungu nobulolo bakhe njengomhlolokazi yinkonzo yakhe awayeyinikela ngomthandazo.

22. Abanye abahlolokazi nabahlolo baye bahlangabezane njani nobulolo?

²² Elinye ibhinqa elineminyaka engama-72 ubudala nelineminyaka elishumi lingumhlolokazi lithi: “Eyona nto ibilucelomngeni kum kukungabi naqabane endinokuncokola nalo. Indoda yam yayingumphulaphuli olungileyo. Sasidla ngokuncokola ngebandla nangesabelo sethu kubulungiseleli bamaKristu.” Omnye umhlolokazi uthi: “Nangona ukuhamba kwexesha kuphilisa, ndifumanise ukuba kuchane ngakumbi ukuthi, koko umntu akwenzayo ngexesha lakhe okumnceda aphile. Ukwimeko entle yokunceda abanye.” Omnye umhlolo oneminyaka engama-67 uvuma esithi: “Eyona ndlela iluncedo yokuhlangabezana nentlungu yokufelwa kukuzibhokoxa ekuthuthuzeleni abanye.”

UKUXATYISWA NGUTHIXO USAKUBA UKHULILE

23, 24. Yiyiphi intuthuzelo enikelwa yiBhayibhile kwabalupheleyo ngokukodwa abo bangabahlolokazi?

²³ Nangona ukufa kulithabatha iqabane olithandayo, uYehova uhlala ethembekile, akaze akushiye. UKumkani uDavide wamandulo wavuma ingoma esithi: “Ndicele nto-nye kuYehova, ndifuna yona: Ukuba ndihlale endlwini kaYehova yonke imihla yobomi bam, ndibone ubuhle bukaYehova, ndiphicothe etempileni yakhe.”—INdumiso 27:4.

²⁴ Umpostile uPawulos ubongoza esithi: “Babeke abahlolokazi abangabahlolokazi ngokwenene.” (1 Timoti 5:3) Isiluleko esilandela lo myalelo sibonisa ukuba abahlolokazi abafanelekayo abangenazalamane zisondeleyo kusenokuba kwakufuneka ibandla libaxhase ngezinto eziphathekayo. Sekunjalo, ingongoma yalo myalelo wokuba ‘babekwe’ iquka ukubaxabisa. Hayi indlela abanokuthuthuzeleka ngayo abahlolokazi nabahlolo kukwazi ukuba uYehova uyabaxabisa yaye uya kubalondoloza!—Yakobi 1:27.

25. Luluphi usukelo abasamele babe nalo abalupheleyo?

²⁵ ILizwi likaThixo eliphefumlelweyo livakalisa oku: “Ubuhle bamadoda amakhulu zizimvi.” ‘Zisisithsaba sokuhomba esifunyanwa endleleni yobulungisa.’ (IMizekeliso 16:31; 20:29) Ngoko, enoba utshatile okanye akutshatanga, qhubeka kwakhona ubeka inkonzo kaYehova kuqala ebomini bakho. Ngaloo ndlela uya kuba negama elihle noThixo ngoku nethemba lobomi obungunaphakade kwihlabathi elingayi kuba nazintlungu nakwaluphala.—INdumiso 37:3-5; Isaya 65:20.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

LE MIGAQO YEBHAYIBHILE INGAZINCEDA NJANI . . . IZIBINI NJENGOKUBA ZIKHULA?

Abazukulwana ‘basisithsaba’ sabantu abalupheleyo.—IMizekeliso 17:6.

Ukwaluphala kunokuzisa amathuba angakumbi okukhonza uYehova.—INdumiso 71:9, 14.

Abakhulileyo bakhuthazwa ukuba babe “ngcathu ngokwemikhwa.”—Tito 2:2.

Amaqabane asentlungwini yokufelwa, nangona ebuhlungu ngokunzulu, anokufumana intuthuzelo eBhayibhileni.—Yohane 11:11, 25.

UYehova uyabaxabisa abathembekileyo.—IMizekeliso 16:31.

[Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 166]

Njengokuba nikhula, lomelezeni uthando lwenu

Isahluko 15

Ukubeka Abazali Bethu Abalupheleyo

1. Liliphi ityala esinalo kubazali bethu, yaye simele sivakalelwe njani size sibenzele ntoni?

ISILUMKO samandulo saluleka sisithi: “Mphulaphule uyihlo, lowo wakuzalayo, ungamdeli unyoko akuba mkhulu.” (IMizekeliso 23:22) Usenokuthi: ‘Andinakuze ndiyenze loo nto!’ Kunokubajongela phantsi oomama bethu—okanye ootata bethu—inkoliso yethu ibathanda ngokunzulu. Siyaqonda ukuba sinetyala elikhulu kubo. Okokuqala, abazali bethu basinika ubomi. Ngoxa uYehova enguMthombo wobomi, ukuba abazali bethu bebengekho ngesingekho. Ayikho into esinokuyinika abazali bethu exabiseke njengobomi. Kwakhona, cinga ngokuzincama, inkxalabo, iindleko nenyameko enothando ebandakanyekileyo ekuncedeni umntwana ekukhuleni kwakhe ade abe ngumntu omkhulu. Ngoko ke, hayi indlela ekusengqiqweni ngayo ukuba iLizwi likaThixo lisiluleke lisithi: “Beka uyihlo nonyoko . . . ukuze kukuhambele kakuhle uze uhlale ixesha elide emhlabeni”!—Efese 6:2, 3.

UKUQONDA IINTSWELO ZABO EZINGOKWEEMVAKALELO

2. Abantwana abakhulileyo banokubahlawula njani “imbuyekezo” abazali babo?

² Umpostile uPawulos wabhalela amaKristu wathi: “[Abantwana okanye abazukulwana] mabafunde kuqala ukuqhelisela uzinikelo lobuthixo kweyabo indlu nokuqhubeka bebahlawula imbuyekezo ebafaneleyo abazali noomawokhulu babo, kuba oku kwamkelekile emehlweni kaThixo.” (1 Timoti 5:4) Abantwana abakhulileyo bayihlawula le “mbuyekezo” ngokubonisa uxabiso ngothando, umsebenzi nenyameko abayibonakalisa kubo abazali noomakhulu nootatomkhulu babo kangangeminyaka emininzi. Enye indlela abanokukwenza ngayo oku abantwana kukuqonda ukuba abantu abadala bayakufuna ukuthandwa nokukhuthazwa ngokufanayo nabanye abantu—badla ngokukufuna ngakumbi oku. Njengathi sonke, bayakufuna ukuziva bexatyiswa. Bayafuna ukuva ukuba ubomi babo buxabisekile.

3. Sinokubabeka njani abazali noomakhulu nootatomkhulu?

³ Ngoko sinokubabeka abazali noomakhulu nootatomkhulu bethu ngokubazisa ukuba siyabathanda. (1 Korinte 16:14) Ukuba abazali bethu abahlali nathi, sifanele sikhumbule ukuba ukunxibelelana nabo kunokubavuyisa gqitha. Ukubabhalela ileta emnandi, ukubatsalela umnxeba, okanye ukubatyelela kunokufak’ isandla ngokwenene kuvuyo lwabo. UMiyo, ohlala eJapan, xa wayeneminyaka engama-82 ubudala wabhala wathi: “Intombi yam [enomyeni ongumlungiseleli ohambahambayo] indixelela oku: ‘Mama, ndicela “uhambe” nathi.’ Indithumelela ucwangciso lohambo lwabo nenombolo yomnxeba yeveki nganye. Ndiyakwazi ukujonga kwimaphu yam ndize ndithi: ‘Owu. Balapha ngoku!’ Ndisoloko ndimbulela uYehova ngokundisikelela ngomntwana onje.”

UKUBANCEDA NGEZINTO EZIPHATHEKAYO

4. Isithethe sonqulo samaYuda sasiyikhuthaza njani inkohlakalo kubantu abalupheleyo?

⁴ Ngaba ukubeka abazali bakho kusenokuquka ukunyamekela iintswelo zabo zezinto eziphathekayo? Ewe. Kusoloko kunjalo. Ngomhla kaYesu iinkokeli zonqulo zamaYuda zazikhuthaza isithethe sokuba ukuba umntu uthe imali okanye into yakhe ‘sisipho esinikelwe kuThixo,’ wayengenambopheleleko yakuyisebenzisela ukunyamekela abazali bakhe. (Mateyu 15:3-6) Enjani yona inkohlakalo! Enyanisweni, ezo nkokeli zonqulo zazikhuthaza abantu ukuba bangababeki abazali babo kodwa babadele ngokuthi ngokuzingca bangazikhathaleli iintswelo zabo. Thina asifuni ukuba kwenzeke oko!—Duteronomi 27:16.

5. Nangona ekho amalungiselelo karhulumente kwamanye amazwe, kutheni ukubeka abazali bakho maxa wambi kuquka ukubanceda ngemali?

⁵ Kumazwe amaninzi namhlanje, iinkqubo ezixhaswa ngurhulumente zilungiselela abantu abalupheleyo izinto eziphathekayo, njengokutya, impahla nekhusi. Ukongezelela koko, abalupheleyo basenokuba bakulungiselela ukwaluphala kwabo. Kodwa ukuba la malungiselelo ayaphela okanye akanele, abantwana babeka abazali babo ngokwenza oko banako ukuze banelise iintswelo zabazali babo. Enyanisweni, ukunyamekela abazali abalupheleyo bubungqina bozinikelo lobuthixo, oko kukuthi, kukuzinikela kuYehova uThixo, uMsunguli welungiselelo lentsapho.

UTHANDO NOKUZINCAMA

6. Ngawaphi amalungiselelo okuphila abanye abaye bawenza ukuze banyamekele iintswelo zabazali babo?

⁶ Abantwana abaninzi abatshatileyo baye bazinyamekela ngokunothando nangokuzincama iintswelo zabazali abalupheleyo. Bambi baye babathabatha baya kuhlala nabo okanye bafudukela kufutshane nabo. Abanye baye baya kuhlala nabazali babo. Amaxesha amaninzi, loo malungiselelo aye angqineka eyintsikelelo kubazali nakubantwana.

7. Kutheni kukuhle ukuba singazenzi ngokungxama izigqibo ngabazali abalupheleyo?

⁷ Noko ke, maxa wambi ukwenza oko akubi namiphumo mihle. Ngoba? Mhlawumbi ngenxa yokuba ezo zigqibo zenziwe ngokungxama okanye kungacingwanga. IBhayibhile ngobulumko ilumkisa isithi: “Onobuqili uyakuqonda ukunyathela kwakhe.” (IMizekeliso 14:15) Ngokomzekelo, masithi umama wakho owalupheleyo unengxaki yokuhlala yedwa yaye ucinga ukuba angancedakala ngokuza kuhlala nawe. Xa ukuqonda ngobulumko ukunyathela kwakho, usenokuzibuza oku kulandelayo: Yiyiphi eyona nto ayisweleyo? Ngaba zikho iinkonzo ezithile okanye ezikarhulumente ezinokunikela isicombululo esisesinye? Ngaba uyafuna ukufuduka? Ukuba uyafuna, kuza kubuchaphazela njani ubomi bakhe? Ngaba kuza kufuneka ashiye abahlobo bakhe ngasemva? Oku kuza kuzichaphazela njani iimvakalelo zakhe? Ngaba ukhe wathetha naye ngale mibandela? Oko kufuduka kuza kukuchaphazela njani wena, iqabane lakho nabantwana bakho? Ukuba umama wakho ufuna ukunyanyekelwa, ngubani oza kwenza oko? Ngaba ningabelana ngaloo mbopheleleko? Ngaba uwuxubushile lo mbandela nabo babandakanyekileyo?

8. Ngubani onokuthetha naye xa usenza isigqibo sokunceda abazali bakho abalupheleyo?

⁸ Ekubeni imbopheleleko yokumnyamekela ibandakanya bonke abantwana bentsapho, kusenokuba bubulumko ukuba nentlanganiso yentsapho ukuze bonke babe nesabelo kwezi zigqibo. Ukuthetha nabadala kwibandla lamaKristu okanye nabahlobo abaye banengxaki efanayo nako kusenokukunceda. IBhayibhile ilumkisa isithi: “Iingcinga ziyatshitsha ngokungabikho kokucweya; ke zona zima ngamaphakathi amaninzi.”—IMizekeliso 15:22.

YIBA NOVELWANO NOLWAZELELELO

9, 10. (a) Nangona iminyaka ihamba, luluphi ulwazelelelo olufanele luboniswe kwabalupheleyo? (b) Enoba umntwana okhulileyo uthabatha liphi inyathelo ngabazali bakhe, yintoni afanele asoloko ebanika yona?

⁹ Ukubeka abazali bethu abalupheleyo kufuna sibe novelwano nolwazelelelo. Njengokuba iminyaka ihamba, abantu abakhulileyo basenokukufumanisa kunzima ngakumbi ukuhamba, ukutya nokukhumbula izinto. Basenokufuna ukuncedwa. Abantwana badla ngokuzixhalabisa gqitha ngoku baze bazame ukubanika ukhokelo. Kodwa abantu abalupheleyo badala yaye baye baqokelela ubulumko namava ebomini, ubomi babo bonke bebezinyamekela yaye bezenzela izigqibo. Oko bakuko nokuzihlonela kuxhomekeke kwindima yabo njengabazali nabantu abakhulu. Abazali abavakalelwa kukuba bamele bazivumele balawulwe ngabantwana basenokudandatheka yaye bacaphuke. Abanye bayaqumba baze bayichase imigudu abacinga ukuba ibahlutha inkululeko yabo.

¹⁰ Ezi ngxaki azinazicombululo zilula, kodwa bububele ukuvumela abazali abalupheleyo bazinyamekele baze bazenzele izigqibo zabo kangangoko banako. Kububulumko ukungazenzeli izigqibo ngoko kufanele abazali bakho ungekathethi nabo kuqala. Basenokuba bayaphelelwa. Banike ithuba lokukhe baziphathe. Usenokufumanisa ukuba xa uyeka ukulawula ubomi babo, ulwalamano lwenu luya kuba luhle ngakumbi. Baya konwaba ngakumbi, yaye nawe uya kuba njalo. Kwanokuba kufuneka ubanyanzele kwezinye izinto eziza kubanceda, ukubeka abazali bakho kufuna ukuba ubaphathe ngokundiliseka nentlonelo ebafaneleyo. ILizwi likaThixo lisiluleka lisithi: “Suka ume ebusweni bengwevu, ububeke ubuso bexhego.”—Levitikus 19:32.

UKUHLALA UNESIMO SENGQONDO ESIFANELEKILEYO

11-13. Ukuba ulwalamano lomntwana okhulileyo belungeluhle nabazali bakhe ngaphambili, unokujamelana njani nocelomngeni lokubanyamekela xa bekhulile ngeminyaka?

¹¹ Maxa wambi ingxaki ababanayo abantwana abadala ekubekeni abazali babo abalupheleyo iquka ulwalamano ababenalo nabazali babo ngaphambili. Mhlawumbi utata wakho wayengenabubele yaye engenaluthando, umama wakho ebukhali yaye engqwabalala. Usenokuba usakhathazekile, unomsindo, okanye ubuhlungu kuba babengelohlobo lwabazali owawufuna babe lulo. Ngaba unokuzoyisa iimvakalelo ezinjalo?a

¹² UBasse, owakhulela eFinland, ubalisa oku: “Utata wam wesibini wayeligosa lamaSS kwiJamani yamaNazi. Wayecaphuka msinya, yaye wayenobungozi. Amaxesha amaninzi wayebetha umama ndibukele. Ngenye imini ndandimcaphukisile, watsala ibhanti lakhe waza wandibetha ngekhonkco lalo ebusweni. Landibetha ndaya kuthi khotsho ngaphaya kwebhedi.”

¹³ Ukanti, kwelinye icala wayengumntu wumbi. UBasse wongezelela athi: “Kwelinye icala, wayesebenza nzima yaye wayezibhokoxa ekunyamekeleni intsapho ngezinto eziphathekayo. Akazange abe nomsa njengotata kum, kodwa ndiyazi ukuba wayenengxaki engokweemvakalelo. Wagxothwa ngunina eseyinkwenkwana. Wakhula ezilwela waza walwa emfazweni akuba ngumfana. Ndandinolwazelelelo ngemeko yakhe ukusa kumlinganiselo othile yaye andizange ndimbeke tyala. Ebudaleni bam, ndandifuna ukumnceda kangangoko ndinako de waya kufa. Kwakungelula, kodwa ndenza konke okusemandleni am. Ndazama ukuba ngunyana olungileyo kwada kwasekugqibeleni, yaye ndicinga ukuba wandamkela njengonyana wakhe.”

14. Sisiphi isibhalo esisebenza kuzo zonke iimeko, kuquka naleyo ivela xa unyamekela abazali abalupheleyo?

¹⁴ Kwiimeko zentsapho, njengakwezinye iimeko, esi siluleko seBhayibhile siyasebenza: “Yambathani umsa onofefe wemfesane, ububele, ukuthobeka kwengqondo, ubulali, nokuzeka kade umsindo. Qhubekani ninyamezelana yaye nixolelana ngesisa ukuba nabani na unonobangela wokukhalazela omnye. Kwananjengoko noYehova wanixolela ngesisa, yenzani njalo nani.”—Kolose 3:12, 13.

LOWO UNYAMEKELA OMNYE UMNTU NAYE UFUNA UKUNYANYEKELWA

15. Kutheni ukunyamekela abazali maxa wambi kudandathekisa?

¹⁵ Ukunyamekela umzali owalupheleyo kungumsebenzi onzima, kubandakanya okuninzi, kuyimbopheleleko enkulu, yaye kufuna ixesha elininzi. Kodwa eyona nto idla ngokuba nzima ziimvakalelo. Kubuhlungu ukubukela umzali wakho enempilo enkenenkene, elibala yaye engasakwazi kuzinceda. USandy, wasePuerto Rico, ubalisa oku: “Umama wayeyintsika yasekhaya. Kwakubuhlungu ukumnyamekela. Waqala ngokuqhwalela; kwaza kwafuneka asimelele, kwaza kwafuneka aqhutywe ngesitulo esinamavili. Emva koko yaba mandundu gqitha imeko yakhe wada waya kulala kobandayo. Waba nomhlaza wamathambo kwaza kwafuneka ahlale enyanyekelwa—imini nobusuku. Sasimhlamba simtyisa size simfundele. Sasitsala nzima gqitha—ngokukodwa ngokweemvakalelo. Xa ndaphawula ukuba umama uyafa, ndalila gqitha kuba ndandimthanda ngeyona ndlela.”

16, 17. Liliphi icebiso elinokunceda lowo unyamekela omnye umntu ahlale ezijonga ngokulungeleleneyo izinto?

¹⁶ Ukuba uzifumanisa ukuloo meko, yintoni onokuyenza ukuze uphumelele? Ukuphulaphula uYehova ngokufunda iBhayibhile nokuthetha naye ngomthandazo kuya kukunceda ngokwenene. (Filipi 4:6, 7) Ngendlela esebenzisekayo, qiniseka ukuba utya ukutya okunesondlo yaye zama ukulala ngokwaneleyo. Ngokwenza oku, uya kukulungela, ngokweemvakalelo nangokwasemzimbeni, ukunyamekela omthandayo. Mhlawumbi usenokulungiselela ukufumana isiqabu kucwangciso lwemihla ngemihla. Kwanaxa ungenakuya ekhefini, sekunjalo kububulumko ukucwangcisa ixesha lokuphumla. Ukuze ufumane ixesha, usenokukwazi ukulungiselela ukuba omnye umntu ahlale nomzali wakho ogulayo.

¹⁷ Kuqhelekile ukuba umntu omdala onyamekela omnye umntu alindele ukwenza izinto asenokungakwazi ukuzenza. Kodwa musa ukuziva unetyala xa ungakwazi ukwenza ezinye izinto. Kwezinye iimeko kusenokufuneka use loo mntu umthandayo kwikhaya lokunyamekela abantu abakhulileyo. Ukuba unyamekela umntu othile, lindela ukwenza izinto ngokwamandla akho. Kufuneka ulungelelanise iintswelo zabazali bakho nezabantwana bakho, ezeqabane lakho nezakho.

AMANDLA ANGAPHEZULU KUNAQHELEKILEYO

18, 19. Liliphi idinga elenziwe nguYehova lokusixhasa, yaye ngawaphi amava abonisa ukuba uyaligcina eli dinga?

¹⁸ NgeLizwi lakhe, iBhayibhile, uYehova ngothando usinika ukhokelo olunokunceda umntu onyamekela umzali owalupheleyo, kodwa uncedo lwakhe aluphelelanga apho. “Usondele uYehova kubo bonke abamnqulayo,” ephefumlelwe wabhala watsho umdumisi. “Akuve ukuzibika kwabo, abasindise.” UYehova uya kubasindisa, okanye abalondoloze, abathembekileyo bakhe kwanakwezona meko zinzima.—INdumiso 145:18, 19.

¹⁹ UMyrna, wakwiiPhilippines, wafumanisa ukuba xa enyamekela unina, owayengakwazi kuzenzela nto ngenxa yokufa amalungu omzimba. UMyrna ubhala athi: “Akukho nto idandathekisa njengokubona umntu omthandayo ebandezelekile, engakwazi ukuxelela ukuba kubuhlungu phi. Kwakufana nokumbukela esiya ezika emanzini, kube kungekho nto ndinokuyenza. Amaxesha amaninzi ndandidla ngokuguqa ngedolo ndichazele uYehova indlela endidinwe ngayo. Ndakhala njengoDavide, owabongoza uYehova ukuba afake iinyembezi zakhe entsubeni aze amkhumbule. [INdumiso 56:8] Yaye njengokuba uYehova wathembisayo, wandinika amandla endandiwafuna. ‘UYehova wandixhasa.’”—INdumiso 18:18.

20. Liliphi idinga eliseBhayibhileni elinceda abo banyamekela abanye bahlale benethemba, kwanaxa umntu abamnyamekelayo esifa?

²⁰ Kuye kuthiwe ukunyamekela umzali owalupheleyo “kukudlala ngexesha.” Nangona kusenokwenziwa konke okusemandleni ukunyamekela abakhulileyo, basenokufa, njengokuba wenzayo umama kaMyrna. Kodwa abo bakholose ngoYehova bayazi ukuba ukufa akuyonto yokugqibela. Umpostile uPawulos wathi: “Ndinethemba kuThixo . . . lokuba kuza kubakho uvuko kokubini olwamalungisa nabangengomalungisa.” (IZenzo 24:15) Abo baye bafelwa ngabazali bathuthuzelwa lithemba lovuko kunye nedinga lehlabathi elitsha elichwayitisayo elenziwe nguThixo ‘ekungasayi kubakho kufa’ kulo.—ISityhilelo 21:4.

21. Yiyiphi imiphumo emihle eziswa kukubeka abazali abalupheleyo?

²¹ Abakhonzi bakaThixo babaxabise gqitha abazali babo, kwanaxa bekhulile. (IMizekeliso 23:22-24) Bayababeka. Ngokwenjenjalo, bafumana oko imizekeliso ephefumlelweyo ikutshoyo: “Makavuye uyihlo nonyoko, agcobe umfazi owakuzalayo.” (IMizekeliso 23:25) Yaye ngaphezu kweento zonke, abo babeka abazali babo abalupheleyo bakholisa yaye babeka uYehova uThixo.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

LE MIGAQO YEBHAYIBHILE INGASINCEDA NJANI . . . SIBEKE ABAZALI BETHU ABALUPHELEYO?

Sifanele sibanike imbuyekezo ebafaneleyo abazali bethu noomakhulu nootatomkhulu bethu.—1 Timoti 5:4.

Yonke imicimbi yethu mayenzeke ngothando.—1 Korinte 16:14.

Izigqibo ezibalulekileyo azifanele zenziwe ngokungxama.—IMizekeliso 14:15.

Abazali abalupheleyo, kwanaxa begula naxa besiya beba buthathaka, bamele bahlonelwe.—Levitikus 19:32.

Asiyi kusoloko silindelwe kukwaluphala nakukufa.—ISityhilelo 21:4.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 179]

Akubobulumko ukwenza izigqibo ngomzali ungakhange uthethe naye kuqala

Isahluko 16

Lungiselela Intsapho Yakho Ikamva Elingunaphakade

1. Yiyiphi injongo kaYehova ngelungiselelo lentsapho?

XA UYEHOVA wamanyanisa uAdam noEva ngomtshato, uAdam wavakalisa uvuyo lwakhe ngokusebenzisa amazwi awaba ngumbongo wokuqala obhaliweyo wesiHebhere. (Genesis 2:22, 23) Noko ke, injongo yoMdali yayingaphelelanga ekonwabiseni abantwana bakhe abangabantu kuphela. Wayefuna izibini ezitshatileyo neentsapho zenze ukuthanda kwakhe. Waxelela isibini sokuqala oku: “Qhamani, nande, niwuzalise umhlaba niweyise; nibe nobukhosi ezintlanzini zolwandle, nasezintakeni zezulu, nasezintweni zonke eziphilileyo ezinambuzelayo emhlabeni.” (Genesis 1:28) Esinjani sona ukuzuka nokuba nomvuzo isabelo! Hayi indlela engebabonwabe ngayo bona nabantwana ababeza kuba nabo ukuba uAdam noEva babenze ukuthanda kukaYehova ngokumthobela ngokupheleleyo!

2, 3. Iintsapho zingalufumana njani ulonwabo olukhulu namhlanje?

² Nanamhlanje, iintsapho zonwaba gqitha xa zisebenzisana ekwenzeni ukuthanda kukaThixo. Umpostile uPawulos wabhala wathi: “Uzinikelo lobuthixo luyingenelo kuzo zonke izinto, njengoko lunesithembiso sobomi ngoku nesobo buza kuza.” (1 Timoti 4:8) Intsapho ephila ngozinikelo lobuthixo nelandela ukhokelo lukaYehova oluseBhayibhileni iya kufumana ulonwabo ‘kubomi bangoku.’ (INdumiso 1:1-3; 119:105; 2 Timoti 3:16) Kwanaxa lilinye ilungu lentsapho elisebenzisa imigaqo yeBhayibhile, kubakho umahluko kunaxa kungekho nelinye.

³ Le ncwadi ixubushe imigaqo emininzi yeBhayibhile efak’ isandla kulonwabo lwentsapho. Mhlawumbi uphawule ukuba eminye yayo ivela ngokuphindaphindiweyo kule ncwadi. Ngoba? Kuba imela iinyaniso ezinamandla eziluncedo kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi bentsapho. Intsapho ezabalazela ukusebenzisa le migaqo yeBhayibhile ifumanisa ukuba uzinikelo lobuthixo ngokwenene ‘lunesithembiso sobomi ngoku.’ Makhe siphinde siqwalasele zibe ne kwezo ngongoma zibalulekileyo.

UKUBALULEKA KOKUZEYISA

4. Kutheni ukuzeyisa kubalulekile emtshatweni?

⁴ UKumkani uSolomon wathi: “Ngumzi otyhoboziweyo, ongenaludonga, indoda engenakuzibamba umoya wayo.” (IMizekeliso 25:28; 29:11) ‘Ukubamba umoya,’ ukuzeyisa, kubalulekile kwabo bafuna ukuba nemitshato eyonwabisayo. Ukunikezela kwiimvakalelo ezitshabalalisayo, njengomsindo okanye iminqweno yokuziphatha okubi, kuya kwenza umonakalo ekuya kuthabatha iminyaka emininzi ukuwulungisa—ukuba unokulungiswa kwaukulungiswa.

5. Umntu ongafezekanga unokukuhlakulela njani ukuzeyisa, yaye angangenelwa njani?

⁵ Kakade ke, ayikho inzala ka-Adam enokuyilawula ngokupheleleyo inyama yayo engafezekanga. (Roma 7:21, 22) Sekunjalo, ukuzeyisa kusisiqhamo somoya. (Galati 5:22, 23) Ngenxa yoko, umoya kaThixo uya kusenza sikwazi ukuzeyisa ukuba siyaluthandazela olu phawu, ukuba sisebenzisa isiluleko esifanelekileyo esifumaneka eZibhalweni, yaye ukuba sinxulumana nabanye abalubonisayo size sibaphephe abo bangalubonisiyo. (INdumiso 119:100, 101, 130; IMizekeliso 13:20; 1 Petros 4:7) Elo khondo liya kusinceda ‘sisabe kulo uhenyuzo,’ kwanaxa silingwa. (1 Korinte 6:18) Siya kuluchasa ugonyamelo size siphephe okanye soyise ukukhotyokiswa butywala. Yaye siya kuzola xa sicatshukiswa naxa sisebunzimeni. Ngamana sonke—kuquka nabantwana—singafunda ukuhlakulela esi siqhamo somoya sibalulekileyo.—INdumiso 119:1, 2.

IMBONO EFANELEKILEYO NGOBUNTLOKO

6. (a) UThixo umisele luphi uludwe ngokuphathelele ubuntloko? (b) Yintoni emele iyikhumbule indoda ukuze ubuntloko bayo buzise ulonwabo kwintsapho yayo?

⁶ Umgaqo wesibini obalulekileyo kukuhlonela ubuntloko. UPawulos wazidwelisa ngokufanelekileyo izinto xa wathi: “Kodwa ndifuna nazi ukuba intloko yayo yonke indoda nguKristu; ngokulandelayo intloko yomfazi yindoda; ngokulandelayo intloko kaKristu nguThixo.” (1 Korinte 11:3) Oku kuthetha ukuba indoda iyakhokela entsatsheni, umkayo uyixhasa ngokunyaniseka, yaye abantwana bathobela abazali babo. (Efese 5:22-25, 28-33; 6:1-4) Noko ke, phawula ukuba ubuntloko bukhokelela kulonwabo kuphela xa busetyenziswa ngendlela efanelekileyo. Amadoda aphila ngozinikelo lobuthixo ayazi ukuba ubuntloko asikokuba nguzwilakhe. Axelisa uYesu, iNtloko yawo. Nangona uYesu ‘wayeyintloko yezinto zonke,’ “weza, kungekhona ukuba alungiselelwe, kodwa ukuze alungiselele.” (Efese 1:22; Mateyu 20:28) Ngendlela efanayo, indoda engumKristu ubuntloko bayo ayibusebenzisi, ukuze kungenelwe yona, kodwa ukuze inyamekele izilangazelelo zomfazi nabantwana bayo.—1 Korinte 13:4, 5.

7. Yiyiphi imigaqo engokweZibhalo eya kunceda umfazi azalisekise indima yakhe ayinikwe nguThixo kwintsapho?

⁷ Umfazi ophila ngozinikelo lobuthixo akakhuphisani okanye azame ukuyilawula indoda yakhe. Uyakuvuyela ukuyixhasa aze asebenzisane nayo. Maxa wambi iBhayibhile ithetha ngomfazi ngokuthi ‘ngowendoda’ yakhe, nto leyo ecacisa ukuba iyintloko yakhe. (Genesis 20:3) Ngokutshata uba phantsi ‘komthetho wendoda yakhe.’ (Roma 7:2) Kwangaxeshanye, iBhayibhile imbiza ngokuthi ‘ngumncedi’ nokuthi ‘umphelelisi.’ (Genesis 2:20) Wongezelela iimpawu nobuchule indoda yakhe engenabo, yaye uyinika inkxaso efunekayo. (IMizekeliso 31:10-31) Kwakhona iBhayibhile ithi umfazi “lidlelane,” elisebenzisana ngaxhatha linye nendoda yalo. (Malaki 2:14) Le migaqo yeZibhalo inceda indoda nomfazi baxabise isigxina somnye nomnye baze baphathane ngentlonelo efanelekileyo nangondiliseko.

‘KHAWULEZA UKUVA’

8, 9. Chaza eminye imigaqo eya kunceda bonke kwintsapho baphucule ubuchule babo bokunxibelelana.

⁸ Kule ncwadi ngokufuthi kubalaseliswe imfuneko yokunxibelelana. Ngoba? Kuba izinto zihamba kakuhle xa abantu bethetha baze baphulaphulane ngokwenene. Kuye kwabethelelwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo ukuba unxibelelwano alukho calanye. Umfundi uYakobi wakuchaza oku ngale ndlela: “Wonke umntu umele akhawuleze ukuva, acothe ukuthetha, acothe ukuqumba.”—Yakobi 1:19.

⁹ Kwakhona kubalulekile ukuba silumkele indlela esithetha ngayo. Amazwi athethwe ngokungxama, arhabaxa, okanye okunyemba akenzi kubekho unxibelelwano oluphumelelayo. (IMizekeliso 15:1; 21:9; 29:11, 20) Kwanaxa oko sikuthethayo kuchanile, ukuba sikuthethe ngenkohlakalo, ngekratshi, okanye ngokungenaluvelwano, mhlawumbi kunokuchitha kunokuba kwakhe. Ukuthetha kwethu kufanele kube nencasa, ‘kunongwe ngetyuwa.’ (Kolose 4:6) Amazwi ethu afanele afane ‘neelamuni zegolide kwizitya zesilivere.’ (IMizekeliso 25:11) Iintsapho ezifunda ukunxibelelana kakuhle ziye zonwaba ngokuthe chatha.

INDIMA EBALULEKILEYO YOTHANDO

10. Luluphi uhlobo lothando olubalulekileyo emtshatweni?

¹⁰ Igama elithi “uthando” livela ngokuphindaphindiweyo kule ncwadi. Ngaba usalukhumbula uhlobo lothando ekubhekiselwe kulo ngokuyintloko? Liyinyaniso elokuba uthando phakathi kwabantu besini esahlukileyo (ngesiGrike, eʹros) lunendima ebalulekileyo emtshatweni, yaye kwimitshato ephumelelayo, umsa onzulu nobuhlobo (ngesiGrike, phi·liʹa) uyakhula phakathi kwendoda nomfazi. Kodwa olona lubaluleke kakhulu lolo ngesiGrike kuthiwa ngu-a·gaʹpe. Olu luthando esiluhlakulela ngoYehova, ngoYesu nangommelwane wethu. (Mateyu 22:37-39) Luthando olubonakaliswa nguYehova kuluntu. (Yohane 3:16) Hayi indlela ekunokuba kuhle ngayo ukuba sinokubonisa uthando olunjalo kumaqabane ethu omtshato nakubantwana bethu!—1 Yohane 4:19.

11. Uthando luluncedo njani emtshatweni?

¹¹ Emtshatweni olu thando lubalaseleyo ngokwenene “lungumxokelelwane ogqibeleleyo womanyano.” (Kolose 3:14) Lumanyanisa isibini luze lusenze sifune ukwenzelana izinto ezintle size senzele nabantwana baso. Xa iintsapho zisebunzimeni, uthando luyazinceda zijamelane nabo ngomanyano. Njengokuba isibini sikhula, uthando lusinceda sixhasane size sixabisane. “Uthando . . . alufuni ezalo izilangazelelo. . . . Luthwala izinto zonke, lukholelwa izinto zonke, luthemba izinto zonke, lunyamezela izinto zonke. Uthando aluze lusilele.”—1 Korinte 13:4-8.

12. Kutheni ukuthanda uThixo kwesibini esitshatileyo kuwomeleza umtshato waso?

¹² Umanyano lomtshato lomelela ngakumbi xa amaqabane omtshato elutywina ngothando kodwa ngokuyintloko ngokuthanda uYehova. (INtshumayeli 4:9-12) Ngoba? Kaloku umpostile uYohane wabhala wathi: “Oku koko uthando lukaThixo luthetha kona, ukuba sigcine imiyalelo yakhe.” (1 Yohane 5:3) Ngaloo ndlela, isibini sifanele siqeqeshele abantwana baso kuzinikelo lobuthixo kungekhona nje kuba sibathanda abantwana baso ngokunzulu kodwa kuba lo ngumyalelo kaYehova. (Duteronomi 6:6, 7) Sifanele sikuphephe ukuziphatha okubi kungekuphela nje kuba sithandana kodwa ngokuyintloko kuba sithanda uYehova, oya “kubagweba abahenyuzi nabakrexezi.” (Hebhere 13:4) Kwanokuba elinye iqabane libangela iingxaki ezinzulu emtshatweni, ukuthanda uYehova kuya kwenza elinye liqhubeke lilandela imigaqo yeBhayibhile. Ngokwenene, zinoyolo iintsapho ezithandanayo zize ziqinise olo thando ngokuthanda uYehova!

INTSAPHO EYENZA UKUTHANDA KUKATHIXO

13. Ukuzimisela ukwenza ukuthanda kukaThixo kuya kubanceda njani abantu bagcine amehlo abo enjonge kwizinto ezibaluleke ngokwenene?

¹³ Bonke ubomi bomKristu bupheleliselwe ekwenzeni ukuthanda kukaThixo. (INdumiso 143:10) Enyanisweni oko koko kuthethwa luzinikelo lobuthixo. Ukwenza ukuthanda kukaThixo kunceda iintsapho zigcine amehlo azo ejonge kwizinto ezibaluleke ngokwenene. (Filipi 1:9, 10) Ngokomzekelo, uYesu walumkisa wathi: “Ndeza kubangela ukwahlukana, kwendoda nxamnye noyise, nentombi nxamnye nonina, nomfazana nxamnye noninazala. Eneneni, iintshaba zomntu iya kuba ngabantu bendlu yakhe.” (Mateyu 10:35, 36) Kuzaliseka isilumkiso sikaYesu, abalandeli bakhe abaninzi baye batshutshiswa ngamalungu entsapho. Enjani yona ukuba buhlungu imeko! Sekunjalo amaqhina entsapho akafanele abe namandla ngaphezu kothando ngoYehova uThixo nangoYesu Kristu. (Mateyu 10:37-39) Ukuba ubani uyanyamezela nangona intsapho ichasa, abachasi basenokutshintsha xa bebona imiphumo emihle yozinikelo lobuthixo. (1 Korinte 7:12-16; 1 Petros 3:1, 2) Kwanaxa kungenzeki oko, akukho nto izuzwayo ngokuyeka ukukhonza uThixo ngenxa yenkcaso.

14. Umnqweno wokwenza ukuthanda kukaThixo uya kubanceda njani abazali benze izinto eziya kunceda abantwana babo?

¹⁴ Ukwenza ukuthanda kukaThixo kunceda abazali benze izigqibo ezilungileyo. Ngokomzekelo, kwezinye iindawo abazali badla ngokubajonga abantwana njengabaya kuba yinzuzo kamva, yaye banethemba lokunyanyekelwa ngabantwana babo xa baluphele. Ngoxa kukuhle yaye kufanelekile ukuba abantwana abadala banyamekele abazali babo abalupheleyo, olo lwazelelelo alufanele lwenze abazali baqhubele abantwana babo ekuthandeni izinto eziphathekayo. Abazali ababancedi abantwana babo xa bebakhulisela ekuthandeni izinto eziphathekayo ngaphezu kwezinto zokomoya.—1 Timoti 6:9.

15. Umama kaTimoti, uYunike, wayengumzekelo obalaseleyo njani njengomzali owenza ukuthanda kukaThixo?

¹⁵ Umzekelo omhle koku nguYunike, umama womhlobo oselula kaPawulos uTimoti. (2 Timoti 1:5) Nangona wayetshate nomntu ongelokholwa, uYunike, kunye noninakhulu kaTimoti uLoyisi, ngokuphumelelayo bakhulisela uTimoti ekulandeleni uzinikelo lobuthixo. (2 Timoti 3:14, 15) Xa uTimoti wayekhule ngokwaneleyo, uYunike wamvumela aphume ekhaya aze aqalise umsebenzi woBukumkani njengeqabane likaPawulos elingumvangeli wasemazweni. (IZenzo 16:1-5) Hayi indlela amele ukuba wavuya ngayo xa unyana wakhe waba ngumvangeli wasemazweni obalaseleyo! Uzinikelo lwakhe lobuthixo njengomntu omkhulu lwabonisa ukuba waqeqeshwa esemncinane. Ngokuqinisekileyo, uYunike waneliseka waza wavuyiswa kukuva iingxelo ezingobulungiseleli bukaTimoti bokuthembeka, nangona mhlawumbi wayemkhumbula.—Filipi 2:19, 20.

INTSAPHO NEKAMVA LAKHO

16. Njengonyana, yiyiphi inkxalabo efanelekileyo eyaboniswa nguYesu, kodwa yayiyintoni injongo yakhe ephambili?

¹⁶ UYesu wakhulela kwintsapho eyoyika uThixo yaye, njengomntu omkhulu, wabonisa inkxalabo efanelekileyo yonyana ngonina. (Luka 2:51, 52; Yohane 19:26) Noko ke, injongo ephambili kaYesu yayikukuzalisekisa ukuthanda kukaThixo, yaye kuye oku kwakuquka ukuvulela abantu indlela eya ebomini obungunaphakade. Oku wakwenza ngokunikela ubomi bakhe obufezekileyo njengedini lokuhlawulela uluntu olunesono.—Marko 10:45; Yohane 5:28, 29.

17. Liliphi ithemba elizukileyo elavulwa likhondo lokuthembeka likaYesu kwabo benza ukuthanda kukaThixo?

¹⁷ Emva kokufa kukaYesu, uYehova wamvusela kubomi basemazulwini waza wamnika igunya elikhulu, ekugqibeleni wammisela njengoKumkani woBukumkani bamazulu. (Mateyu 28:18; Roma 14:9; ISityhilelo 11:15) Idini likaYesu lavulela abanye abantu ithuba lokukhethwa ukuze balawule naye kobo Bukumkani. Kwakhona lavulela indlela lonke uluntu ukuze lunandiphe ubomi obufezekileyo emhlabeni kwiparadisi ebuyiselweyo. (ISityhilelo 5:9, 10; 14:1, 4; 21:3-5; 22:1-4) Elinye lawona malungelo abalaseleyo esinalo namhlanje kukuxelela abamelwane bethu ezi ndaba zilungileyo.—Mateyu 24:14.

18. Ziziphi izinto ezimele zikhunjulwe nokhuthazo oludluliselwa kwiintsapho nabantu ngabanye?

¹⁸ Njengokuba umpostile uPawulos wabonisayo, ukuphila ubomi bozinikelo lobuthixo kunesithembiso sokuba abantu banokunandipha iintsikelelo kubomi ‘obuzayo.’ Ngokuqinisekileyo, le yeyona ndlela ilungileyo yokufumana ulonwabo! Khumbula ukuba, “ihlabathi liyadlula yaye kunjalo nangomnqweno walo, kodwa lowo wenza ukuthanda kukaThixo uhleli ngonaphakade.” (1 Yohane 2:17) Ngenxa yoko, enoba ungumntwana okanye ungumzali, indoda, okanye umfazi, okanye umntu omdala ongatshatanga, okanye akunabantwana, zama ukwenza ukuthanda kukaThixo. Kwanaxa ucinezelekile okanye usebunzimeni obungathethekiyo, ungaze ulibale ukuba ungumkhonzi kaThixo ophilayo. Ngaloo ndlela, ngamana izenzo zakho zingamvuyisa uYehova. (IMizekeliso 27:11) Yaye ngamana ihambo yakho ingakuzisela ulonwabo ngoku nobomi obungunaphakade kwihlabathi elitsha elizayo!

LE MIGAQO YEBHAYIBHILE INGAYINCEDA NJANI . . . INTSAPHO YAKHO YONWABE?

Ukuzeyisa kunokuhlakulelwa.—Galati 5:22, 23.

Ngokuba nembono efanelekileyo ngobuntloko, indoda nomfazi bafuna intsapho yabo iphumelele.—Efese 5:22-25, 28-33; 6:4.

Unxibelelwano luquka ukuphulaphula.—Yakobi 1:19.

Ukuthanda uYehova kuyawomeleza umtshato.—1 Yohane 5:3.

Ukwenza ukuthanda kukaThixo kulolona sukelo lubalulekileyo lwentsapho.—INdumiso 143:10; 1 Timoti 4:8.

[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 188]

ISIPHIWO SOKUNGATSHATI

Asinguye wonk’ ubani otshatayo. Yaye asizizo zonke izibini ezitshatileyo ezikhetha ukuba nabantwana. UYesu wayengatshatanga, yaye wathetha ngokungatshati njengesiphiwo xa kusenziwa oko ‘ngenxa yobukumkani bamazulu.’ (Mateyu 19:11, 12) Kwakhona umpostile uPawulos wakhetha ukungatshati. Wathetha ngokungatshati nokutshata ‘njengesipho.’ (1 Korinte 7:7, 8, 25-28) Ngenxa yoko, nangona le ncwadi ubukhulu becala ixubusha ngemibandela yomtshato nokukhulisa abantwana, asifanele sizilibale iintsikelelo nemivuzo esisenokuba nayo ngokuhlala singatshatanga okanye ngokutshata size singabi nabantwana.