Lapho Imfucumfucu Ingalawuleki

QALAZA ekhaya lakho. Ingabe umpintshaniswe imfucumfucu? Ingabe ubungaba namahloni ukuba umngane wakho ubengathi nhlá ekhabetheni lakho lezingubo? Ingabe unenkinga yokuthola into ethile ngenxa yokuthi igqibeke ngaphansi kwenqwaba yezimpahla ezinqwatshelanisiwe? Uma kunjalo, awuwedwa.

URalph uyavuma, “Kuwumkhuba wami ‘ukulondoloza.’” ULeon uyenezela: “Ngangicwile ezingutsheni, amaphephandaba, izincwadi engangikuqongelele iminyaka engaphezu kwengu-15.” Esinye isisulu semfucumfucu sabubula, “ukucabanga nje ngokuqoqa kungenza ngikhathale ngingakakuqali.”

Abanye abantwana bakhulela endaweni enemfucumfucu. Omunye umuntu onjalo uthi: “Engikukhumbulayo nje ukuthi, ngaso sonke isikhathi ngangitshela abantu ngalokho okumelwe bakulindele ngokokuqala uma beza kithi. Ngangibatshela ukuthi kulungile ukuba bagudluze okuthile ukuze bathole indawo yokuhlala.” Ngisho nabantu abadala bangase banqikaze ukumema othile ongeyena owomkhaya ukuba avakashe ngenxa yokuthi indlu ingahlelekile.

Ngokuvamile abantu abaqapheli ukuthi kungakanani abaye bakuqongelela kuze kube yilapho sebebhekene nokuthutha. Uma umuntu engazange agcine isimiso sasikhathi sonke sokulahla imfucumfucu, ukuthutha kuthatha isikhathi esiningi​—⁠nemali eningi.

Kodwa kwabaningi, ukucoca imfucumfucu kungaphezu nje kokulahla izinto okulula. Kumelwe kuqale kunqotshwe izihibe eziningi.

Kungani Bengavele Bayilahle?

Esikhathini esithile, isazi sengqondo uLynda W. Warren nesisebenzi sezenhlalakahle uJonnae C. Ostrom babethatha ngokuthi bonke abagcini bemfucumfucu kwakungabantu abadala, ababesinde esikhathini Sendlala Yemali sawo-1930. Babecabanga ukuthi, ukunqwabelanisa “kwakuyindlela engavamile nengalimazi yokuceza kokuvamile noma okulindelekile.” Nokho, ngemva kokuhlolisisa indaba, babika: “Samangala ukuthola isizukulwane esisha esiqongelela izinto esingazisebenzisi, esazalwa ngemuva kakhulu kwawo-1930. . . . Manje sesiyakholelwa ukuthi ukuziphatha okunjalo kuvamile nokuthi, ikakhulukazi lapho kwedlulele, kungase kudale izinkinga kubantu abanjalo nakulabo abaseduze nabo.”

Umkhuba onjalo ungaba mubi kangakanani? Umagazini iHealth uyabika: “UOstrom uye wabona imishado ihlukana ngenxa yemfucumfucu.” Abanye abantu baphendukela kubeluleki ukuze bathole usizo. Eqinisweni, umagazini iHealth ubiza ukwelulekwa komuntu ukuba ahleleke ngokuthi “indima echumayo leyo odokotela bayo abangase babize u-R2 750 ngosuku ukuze abantu benze lokho omama bethu ababesibelesela ukuba sikwenze: hlanzani amakamelo enu.”

Akunakwenzeka ukuthi inkinga yakho yemfucumfucu yimbi kangako. Nakuba kunjalo, usengakuthola kunzima ukunqoba izihibe ezine ezilandelayo ezimi phakathi kwezinto ezihilelekile nomgqomo kadoti:

◻ Ingase idingeke esikhathini esizayo. (“Kungcono ukuyigcina manje kunokuzisola kamuva.”)

◻ Ukunamathela kuyo ngenxa yomzwelo. (“UMama omncane uMary wangipha lokhu.”)

◻ Intengo engase ithengwe ngayo kamuva. (“Ingase ibize okuthile ngolunye usuku.”)

◻ Ukungagugi noma ukulimala. (“Lokhu kuphilile ukuba kulahlwe.”)

Uba yini umphumela? IPsychology Today ithi: “Izimpahla zilokhu zinqwabelana, futhi zinqwabelane nezinkinga ezizidalayo.”

Ngakho ungayinciphisa kanjani imfucumfucu?

Lapho Oqala Khona

Ecelwa ukuba acabange ngendlela abengazizwa ngayo ukuba isiphepho besingagadla sibhubhise konke ngaphandle kwezimpahla ezimbalwa, omunye wesifazane wathi: “Umuzwa engaba nawo kakhulu ngomqondo wokulahlekelwa yikho konke kwakuyinkululeko​—⁠ukukhululwa kuyo yonke imfucumfucu yami ngaphandle kokukhathazeka ngokukhetha nokudela ezinye izinto.” Lokhu kukubonisa kahle ukuthi ukukhetha nokulahla kungaba inselele.

Umxhumanisi uDaralee Schulman uthi, “abagcini bemfucumfucu banezinkinga ezimbili. Izimpahla kakade esezisendlini nezimpahla ezifikayo.” Esikhundleni sokucoca, usikisela ukuchitha isikhathi esincane esiyimizuzu engu-15 ngosuku kuhlelwa indawo eyodwa ngesikhathi. Lokhu kuyindlela ephumelela kakhulu yokubhekana nemfucumfucu esekhaya lakho. Kodwa kuthiwani “ngempahla efikayo”?

Ngaphambi kokuthenga noma yini yekhaya lakho, zibuze: ‘Ingabe ngiyidinga ngempela? Ngizoyibekaphi? Ingabe ngizoyisebenzisa?’ UDaralee Schulman uthi ngokubuza imibuzo enjalo, “amaphesenti angu-75 ezimpahla obuzoziletha ekhaya, ngeke usawaletha.”

Endlunkulu yeWatch Tower Society nasemahhovisi amagatsha, abahlala khona balindeleke ukuba bagcine amakamelo abo engenayo imfucumfucu futhi banciphise inani lezinto zokuhlobisa zibe impahla yasendlini eyodwa noma ishalofu kusukela kwamabili kuya kwamathathu. Lokhu kuwenza ube lula umsebenzi wokucoca futhi kubukeka kahle. Amaphepha, omagazini, izincwadi, izikhwama zezincwadi, izinsimbi zomculo, izinto zokudlala, izingubo, izitsha, nezinye izinto akufanele kushiywe kugcwele yonke indawo. Eqinisweni, akukho lutho okumelwe lube sendaweni ephansi yekamelo ngaphandle kwempahla yasendlini. Ngokuqinisekile lesi yisibonelo sanoma ubani ongathanda ukuhlakulela indawo engenayo imfucumfucu.

Akusekho ​—⁠Kufakwe Ekhabetheni Lezingubo

UJoan uthi, “Ngosuku nje ngangivele ngithi gubhubhu ngicoce indlu yami, kodwa ikhabethe lezingubo lalihlala limahlikilili.” Abanye basebenzisa ikhabethe lezingubo njengendawo yokulahla izinto abangazifuni, bavele bafake imfucumfucu lapho ingenakubonwa khona. Inkinga imane ibe yimbi kakhulu lapho kufakwa okwengeziwe endaweni engakhuli ngobukhulu.

Ingabe ikhabethe lakho lezingubo liyakudinga ukukhululwa emfucumfucwini enqwabelaniswe kulo? Umagazini iGood Housekeeping uyasikisela: “Izimiso zokuhlela amakhabethe ezingubo zitholakala ngezinhlobo zezinto ezingenziwa zingene kunoma iyiphi indawo. Sebenzisa esinye sazo ukuze unqobe inkinga yendawo yokugcina izinto ekhaya lakho.” Ngakho musa ukwenza ikhabethe lakho lezingubo libe yisiphephelo sakho sokufaka udoti. Ligcine licocekile futhi lihlelekile.

Umbono Olinganiselwe Wezimpahla

Omunye wesifazane wathi, “Izimpahla zami ziyimi nje, ziyingxenye yalokho engiyikho.” Omunye wenezela, “Izinto zami zokuhloba ziyinduduzo enkulu kimi. Ave ngizithanda izindandatho zami nemigexo.” Kanti omunye wesifazane ngokucasuka wathi: “Lokhu kuyimi​—⁠lokhu kuwubumina futhi ngeke nje ukulahle!”

Ngokuphambene uJesu wathi: “Ukuphila komuntu akulondolozwa yilokho anakho, ngisho nalapho enokuningi kunakudingayo.”​—⁠Luka 12:​15, The Jerusalem Bible.

Khona-ke iBhayibheli likhuthaza umbono olinganiselwe ngezimpahla umuntu anazo. Futhi likhuthaza ukuhleleka, lenza lokhu kube yimfuneko kulabo abakhonza njengabadala ebandleni.​—⁠1 Thimothewu 3:⁠2.

Kungani ungaqali ukusebenzisa okunye kokusikisela okungenhla kuleyondawo ekumpintshanisela ngaphandle kwekhaya lakho? Ngomzamo wansuku zonke nombono olinganiselwe ngezinto onazo, imfucumfucu ingalawulwa.

[Ibhokisi/Isithombe ekhasini 22, 23]

Ukukhetha Nokulahla Okungadingeki

Okulandelayo okunye kokusikisela okuwusizo ngokuphathelene nezinto ezithe ngqó lezo kalula nje ezingampintshanisa ikhaya lakho uma ungaqaphile.

Okokufunda: Ingabe ukuthola kunzima ukulahla omagazini abadala namaphephandaba? Ingabe isihloko sikuthatha kalula, sikwenze ukuba uthi: ‘Ngizothola isikhathi sokufunda lokhu ngolunye usuku’? Esikhundleni sokugcina wonke umagazini noma iphephandaba, sika isihloko esibonakala sithakazelisa bese usifaka efayilini ebhalwe ukuthi “Okuzofundwa.” Uma kungakafundwa phakathi nesikhathi esithile​—⁠mhlawumbe amasonto ambalwa​—⁠kulahle.

Izingubo: Ingabe izingubo zakho ziyanda njalo unyaka ngamunye, kodwa ube ungagqoki ngisho nengxenye yazo? Abanye bazitshela ukuthi: “Lokhu kuyongihlala kahle​—⁠ngemva kokuba sengehle ngamakhilogremu ayisihlanu.” Lokhu kuba yibhaxa lokubambelela kunoma yini nakukho konke okusekhabetheni lezingubo. Ukuze ugweme ukuminyana okunjalo kwezingubo, uma okuthile kungagqokwanga unyaka wonke, kubeke ebhokisini elibhalwe ukuthi “Akuqinisekwa.” Khona-ke, uma kungakagqokwa ngemva kwesikhashana, phisana ngakho noma ukulahle.

Izincwadi (mail): Lahla izincwadi nsuku zonke. Izincwadi zakho nezinye ofuna ukuzigcina kumelwe zibekwe efayelini endaweni elungiselelwe zona. Ungase ube nefayili yokufaka izincwadi inyanga ngayinye futhi ulahle ekuqukethe ngemva konyaka ukuze kube nendawo yezincwadi zenyanga entsha. Isimiso siwukuthi hlela, musa ukufuhlela. Uma uthola izincwadi eziningi zokukhangisa izimemezelo, nquma ngaleso sikhathi uma uzozidinga. Uma ungeke, zilahle. Uma ungabaza, zifake ebhokisini elibhalwe ukuthi “Akuqinisekwa” isikhathi esingangesonto. Uma ungenzi okuthile ngazo kuze kuphele isonto, zilahle.