Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Kuthekani Ngokugqobhoza?

‘Ukuqala kwam ukubona abantu begqobhoze imilebe namanye amalungu omzimba, ndavakala ndisithi “Yhoo! Abasebahle ngako.”’—ULisa.

ASINGOLISA yedwa ovakalelwa ngolo hlobo. Abaselula abaninzi bafaka imisesane namanye amacici kumalungu abo omzimba awahlukeneyo, kwanakwiintshiyi, iimpumlo, iindlebe, ulwimi, imilebe neenkaba zabo. Le nto bayenzayo kuthiwa kukugqobhoza.a

Omnye oneminyaka eli-16 ubudala ogama linguHeather uzimisele ukuhamba nomndilili kule nkalo. Uvakalelwa kukuba ukufaka umsesane enkabeni “kuyinto entle gqitha.” Noko ke, uJoe oneminyaka eli-19 ubudala sele efaka intsinjana yegolide elulwimini lwakhe. Yaye enye intombazana eselula iye yakhetha ukugqobhoza iintshiyi kuba ifuna into “etsala amehlo” eza kwenza “abantu bayijonge.”

Ukufaka izacholo emzimbeni akuyonto intsha. Emva phayaa ngamaxesha okubhalwa kweBhayibhile, ibhinqa eloyika uThixo eligama linguRebheka lalinxiba umsesane empumlweni. (Genesis 24:22, 47) Ekuphumeni kwawo eYiputa, amaSirayeli ayenxiba amacici. (Eksodus 32:2) Noko ke, esingakwaziyo kukuba, ezo zacholo zazifakwa emva kokuba kugqojozwe indlebe okanye impumlo kusini na. Noko ke, amakhoboka athembekileyo ayedla ngokugqobhoza iindlebe njengophawu lokunyaniseka kwiinkosi zawo. (Eksodus 21:6) Ukugqobhoza bekuxhaphakile naphakathi kwezinye izithethe zamhlamnene. Ama-Aztec namaMaya ayegqobhoza ulwimi ngenxa yezizathu zonqulo. Ukugqojozwa komlebe kusaxhaphakile eAfrika naphakathi kwamaIndiya akuMzantsi Merika. Ukufakwa kwemihombiso ezimpumlweni kuxhaphakile kubantu baseMelanesia nakubemi baseIndiya nasePakistan.

Kude kwayiminyaka embalwa edluleyo, ukugqojozwa kweendlebe kusenziwa ngabafazi kumazwe aseNtshona. Kodwa ngoku abakwishumi elivisayo nabanye abasele bekhulile amadoda namabhinqa banxiba izacholo kulo naliphi na nje ilungu lomzimba ezinokufakwa kulo.

Isizathu Sokuba Bagqobhoze

Abaninzi bayagqobhoza kuba bevakalelwa kukuba kusefashonini—ungumntu phakathi kwabanye xa ukwenzile oko. Abanye bavakalelwa kukuba kubenza babe bahle gqitha. Ngokuqinisekileyo, esi simbo siphenjelelwa zizacholo ezisetyenziswa ngababonisi-mpahla abaphambili, abadlali abadumileyo neemvumi ezaziwayo. Yaye kolunye ulutsha, ukugqobhoza kubonakala njengendlela yokuzimela geqe, nokufuna ukuziva lungoothile, nendlela yokubonakala lukhethekile kwabanye abantu. Umbhali wemihlathi uJohn Leo uthi: “Ukufuna ukucaphukisa abazali nokothusa abantu abanemilinganiselo ephakamileyo kubonakala kuyeyona nto ihamba phambili ekuzigqobhozeni ngokuphindaphindiweyo.” Ukunganeliseki, ukungabi nantsebenziswano, nokuba nemvukelo kubonakala kungunobangela wokufuna ukuba nguthile.

Kukho nabo bazigqobhozayo kuba befuna ukuzanelisa engqondweni nangokweemvakalelo. Ngokomzekelo, abanye abaselula bavakalelwa kukuba kubenza bazixabise ngakumbi. Abanye abantwana abaye bangamaxhoba okuxhatshazwa baye bakugqala njengendlela yokubonisa ukuba bayakwazi ukulawula iziqu zabo.

Iingozi Zempilo

Kodwa ngaba ukugqobhoza kukhuselekile? Oogqirha abaninzi bathi ezinye iindlela zokukwenza azikhuselekanga. Ngokuqinisekileyo ukuzigqobhoza kuyingozi. Nokuya kumntu othi ungumgqobhozi ovunyiweyo kunokuba neengozi zako. Abanye abazange bafunde kakuhle, bafunde kubahlobo, amaphephancwadi okanye kwiividiyo. Umphumo unokuba, kukungasebenzisi iindlela ezicocekileyo okanye baziqonde iingozi zokugqobhoza. Kwakhona, abantu abaninzi abagqobhozayo abawazi kakuhle amalungu omzimba. Asiyongxakana nje leyo, ekubeni ukugqobhoza umngxuma kwindawo engeyiyo kunokubangela umntu ophe angayeki. Ukugqobhoza phezu komthambo-luvo kunokubangela umonakalo ongenakulungiswa.

Enye ingozi enkulu yeyokwasulelwa. Ukusebenzisa izixhobo ezingacocekanga kunokudlulisela izifo ezibulalayo ezinjengehepatitis, uGawulayo, isifo sephepha, netetanus. Naxa kusetyenziswe iindlela ezicocekileyo, kubalulekile ukuba izinto zenziwe ngononophelo emva kwale nkqubo. Ngokomzekelo, ukugqobhoza inkaba kunokukuthukuthezela kuba kusoloko kukhuhlana nempahla. Ngenxa yoko kunokuthabatha iinyanga ezisithoba ukuze kuphile.

Ogqirha bathi ukugqobhoza umsipha wempumlo okanye owendlebe kuyingozi kakhulu kunokugqobhoza indawo eqhelekileyo endlebeni. Iphephandaba leAmerican Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery lithi: “Imingxuma emininzi yamacici ekumantla endlebe ibangela ixhala—kuba isifo sinokubangela ukusuka kwawo onke amantla endlebe. Imihombiso esezimpumlweni nayo inokuba yingozi—ukuba loo ndawo inokuchatshazelwa sisifo sinokunwenwela nakwimithambo yegazi size siye kuqhina ebuchotsheni.” Eli phephandaba liqukumbela ngelithi: “Ngokufanelekileyo, [ukugqobhoza] kufanele kwenziwe kuphela endlebeni.”

Ezinye iingozi zezokuba umzimba ungavumelani nezacholo ezifakwa emva kokugqobhoza nokuba nezinxenxe ezibi. Ukuba imisesane efakwe kwindawo e-ethe-ethe, njengebele, iyabambeka okanye itsalwe yimpahla, lo misesane inokusuka. Isicwili esikrazukileyo ebeleni lentombazana eselula sinokuzivala iingono yaye ukuba ayinyangwa, inokuba nobunzima okanye ingakwazi ukuncancisa usana kamva.

IAmerican Dental Association kutshanje iye yathi ukugqobhoza emlonyeni kuyingozi yempilo yoluntu ngokubanzi. Ezinye iingozi zokugqobhoza amalungu asemlonyeni ziquka ukutsarhwa emva kokuginya izacholo, ukuba ndindisholo nokungakwazi ukungcamla kolwimi, ukopha ungayeki, amazinyo aqhezukileyo okanye awonakeleyo, ukuba namathe amaninzi, ukuvuz’ izinkcwe ngokungalawulekileyo, ukwenzakala kwemihlathi, ukuphazamiseka kokuthetha nobunzima bokuphefumla, ukuhlafuna nokuginya. Xa ibhinqa eliselula uKendra wagqobhoza ulwimi lwakhe, “lwadumba njengebhaloni.” Eyona nto yada yangakumbi kukuba, umntu owayemgqobhoza wasebenzisa umhombiso olungiselelwe isidlele waza wasifaka elulwimini lukaKendra waza wadlakaza isicwili esingaphantsi kolwimi. Waphantsa akakwazi ukuthetha ngokupheleleyo.

UThixo wafundisa abantu bakhe amaSirayeli ukuba bayihlonele imizimba yabo baze bangazenzakalisi. (Levitikus 19:28; 21:5; Duteronomi 14:1) Yaye ngoxa amaKristu namhlanje engasekho phantsi koMthetho kaMoses, asakhuthazwa ukuba ayihlonele imizimba yawo. (Roma 12:1) Ngaba akukho sengqiqweni, ukuphepha ukubeka impilo yakho engozini ngokungeyomfuneko? Noko ke, zikho ezinye iinkalo omele uzihlolisise ngaphandle kwempilo.

Kujongwa Njani?

IBhayibhile ayinikeli myalelo ungqalileyo ngokuphathelele ukugqobhoza. Kodwa ikhuthaza ukuba sizihombise, “ngokuthozama nangengqondo ephilileyo.” (1 Timoti 2:9) Ngoxa enye into inokugqalwa ifanelekile kwenye indawo ehlabathini, eyona nto ibalulekileyo yindlela ejongwa ngayo kwindawo ohlala kuyo. Ngokomzekelo, ukugqobhoza indlebe kwabafazi kusenokwamkeleka kwenye indawo yehlabathi. Kodwa kusenokungathandwa kwelinye ilizwe okanye ngabanye abantu.

Phezu kwako nje ukuthandwa kwako ngabantu abadumileyo, ukugqobhoza nokufaka amacici emadodeni ukuza kuthi ga ngoku akukamkeleki ngokubanzi kumazwe aseNtshona. Esinye isizathu sisenokuba kudala kusetyenziswa ngamabanjwa, amaqela emigulukudu akhwela izithuthuthu, iimvumi zomculo werock okrwada nabo baphila njengamafanasini. Kwabaninzi, ukugqobhoza kuluphawu lwemvukelo. Abaliqela bakujonga njengento eyothusayo nelizothe. Enye intombazana engumKristu egama linguAshley ithi: “Enye inkwenkwe kwiklasi endifunda kuyo isandula ukugqobhoza impumlo. Icinga ukuba yenze into entle. Mna ndiyayicekisa!”

Akumangalisi ukuba, enye ivenkile edumileyo yaseMerika inomthetho wokuba abaqeshwa abasebenza ngokusondeleyo nabathengi bafanele bafake icici elinye kwindlebe nganye yaye zonke ezinye iindlela zokugqobhoza azamkelekanga. Ibhinqa elisisithethi sale nkampani lithi: “Akunakuyazi indlela abathengi abaya kusabela ngayo.” Ngokufanayo abacebisi ngezemisebenzi bacebisa abafundi bakwanokholeji abangamadoda abafaka izicelo zemisebenzi ukuba “bangawanxibi amacici okanye ezinye izacholo ozifaka xa ugqobhozile; amabhinqa akafanele . . . anxibe imisesane ezimpumlweni.”

Ngokukhethekileyo amaKristu aselula afanele aqiniseke ukuba ajongwa kakuhle ngabanye, ngakumbi xa ekumsebenzi wokuhambisa ivangeli. Akafuni ‘ukuba sisikhubekiso nangayiphi na indlela, ukuze kungafunyanwa siphoso kubulungiseleli bawo.’ (2 Korinte 6:3, 4) Enoba unaluphi uluvo ngokugqobhoza, ngendlela ongenakuyiphepha imbonakalo yakho ixela okuthile ngesimo sengqondo nendlela ophila ngayo. Ufuna ukujongwa njani wena?

Ekugqibeleni, nguwe—kwakunye nabazali—omele enze isigqibo kulo mba. Isiluleko seBhayibhile esisengqiqweni sithi: “Ungaze uvumele ihlabathi elikungqongileyo ukuba likuphembelele.” (Roma 12:2, Phillips) Ngapha koko, imiphumo iza kusala nawe.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 21]

Ukugqobhoza kuthandwa gqitha lulutsha