Ndaphulukana Nosana Lwam Olungekazalwa

USUKU lwangoMvulo, Aprili 10, 2000, yayilusuku olupholileyo kukho nelanga, ngoko ndahamba ndaya kulungisa izinto ezithile. Ndandisele ndigqibe iinyanga ezintathu ndikhulelwe, yaye nangona ndandityhafile, ndandikuvuyela ukuba phandle. Ndathi ndisemgceni ndiza kuhlawula kwivenkile yokutya, ndaqonda ukuba kukho into engahambi kakuhle kum.

Ndaqiniseka ngakumbi ndakufika ekhaya. Ndandisopha, nto leyo engazange yenzeke xa ndandikhulelwe kwizihlandlo ezibini ezingaphambili—yaye oku kwandenza ndaphakuzela gqitha! Ndatsalela umnxeba ugqirha wam, kodwa wandicebisa ukuba ndilinde ndize ndifike ngosuku olulandelayo, ekubeni kakade sasicwangcise ukuba ndifike ngelo xesha. Ngaphambi kokuba mna nomyeni wam silalise abantwana bethu ababini ngobo busuku, sathandaza kunye, sicela ukuba uYehova asinike amandla ukuze sikwazi ukujamelana nayo nayiphi na into enokwenzeka. Ekugqibeleni, ndada ndalala.

Kodwa kwathi malunga nentsimbi yesibini, ndavuswa ziingqaqambo ezingathethekiyo. Ekugqibeleni ezi ngqaqambo zathi qabu, kodwa njengoko ndandilala kwakhona, zaphinda zavakala, ngoku zifika ngamaxesha athile alandelelanayo. Nokopha kwathi kratya, yaye ndaqonda ukuba ndiqalwa yinimba. Kwafika iingcinga ezininzi engqondweni yam, ndizama ukucinga enoba kukho nto ithile endiyenzileyo ebangela oku, kodwa andizange ndikhumbule ndisenza nantoni na ephosakeleyo.

Ngentsimbi yesihlanu kusasa, ndaqonda ukuba ndifanele ndiye esibhedlele. Xa mna nomyeni wam safika apho, kwathi qabu sakuba sezandleni zabasebenzi basesibhedlele begumbi longxamiseko abanothando, abakulungeleyo ukunceda nabanovelwano. Kwathi emva kweeyure ezimbini, ugqirha wasixelela iindaba ezibuhlungu zokuba: Ndiphulukene nosana lwam.

Ngenxa yeempawu endandinazo ngaphambili, ndandiyilindele into enjalo, ngoko andizange ndothuke kangako xa ndisiva ezo ndaba. Ngaphezu koko, umyeni wam wayekunye nam ngalo lonke ixesha yaye wandixhasa kakhulu. Kodwa ngoku njengoko sasiza kubuyela ekhaya ngaphandle kosana, sasingaqinisekanga ngendlela esifanele sibaxelele ngayo abantwana bethu ababini, uKaitlyn, owayeneminyaka emithandathu ubudala, kunye noDavid, owayeneminyaka emine ubudala.

Siza Kuthini Kubantwana Bethu?

Abantwana baya kulala besazi ukuba kukho into engahambi kakuhle, kodwa sasiza kubaxelela njani ukuba umntakwabo okanye udadewabo abebekade bemlindele ufile? Sagqiba kwelokuba sibaxelele yonke into size sinyaniseke. Umama wasinceda ngokubaxelela ukuba asizi kubuya nalo usana. Ukufika kwethu, baza kuthi benemincili baza basanga. Umbuzo wokuqala abasibuza wona ngowokuba, “Ngaba usana luphilile?” Aphela emqaleni kum, kodwa umyeni wam, esibambile njengoko senze isangqa, wathi: “Usana lufile.” Sabambana saza salila, nto leyo eyasinceda saqalisa ukujamelana nentlungu.

Nangona kunjalo, asizange siyicinge indlela abantwana bethu abaza kusabela ngayo kamva. Ngokomzekelo, emva kweeveki ezimbini ndiphunyelwe sisisu, kwibandla lamaNgqina kaYehova lasekuhlaleni kwachazwa ukuba iNgqina elithile elikhulileyo ebelingumhlobo wentsapho yethu lifile. UDavid, oneminyaka emine ubudala walila kakhulu, ngoko umyeni wam waphuma naye. Emva kokuba ezolile, uDavid wabuza isizathu sokuba umhlobo wakhe afe. Waza wabuza isizathu sokuba usana lufe. Wandula ke wabuza uyise: “Ngaba nawe uza kufa?” Kwakhona wayefuna ukwazi isizathu sokuba uYehova uThixo angamtshabalalisi uSathana aze aqalise “ukulungisa izinto.” Ngokwenene, samangaliswa zizinto awayezicinga nangona emncinane.

Naye uKaitlyn wabuza imibuzo emininzi. Xa edlala ngoonodoli bakhe, ngokufuthi wayesenza ngathi omnye unodoli uyagula, ngoxa abanye oonodoli bengabongikazi okanye amalungu entsapho. Wayesenza isibhedlele soonodoli ngekhadibhodi aze maxa wambi enze ngathi omnye woonodoli bakhe ufile. Imibuzo nemidlalo emininzi yabantwana bethu yasinika amathuba amaninzi okubafundisa ngeemfundiso ezibalulekileyo ezingobomi nendlela iBhayibhile enokusinceda ngayo ukuze sijamelane neemvavanyo. Kwakhona sabakhumbuza ngenjongo kaThixo yokwenza umhlaba ube yiparadesi entle, ekungekho kubandezeleka nantlungu kuyo—kwanokufa.—ISityhilelo 21:3, 4.

Indlela Endajamelana Ngayo Nale Lahleko

Ngesihlandlo sokuqala endabuyela ngaso ekhaya ndivela esibhedlele, ndandidandathekile yaye ndingazinzanga engqondweni. Kwakukho izinto ezininzi endimele ndizenze, kodwa ndandingazi ukuba ndiqale ngayiphi. Ndatsalela umnxeba iqela labahlobo ababekhe behlelwa yinto efanayo, yaye bandithuthuzela kakhulu. Omnye umhlobo wethu osenyongweni wasithumelela iintyatyambo waza wathi abantwana bangaba kuye imva kwemini yonke. Ndayixabisa kakhulu inkxalabo noncedo lwakhe olusengqiqweni!

Ndalungisa iifoto zentsapho ndizifaka kwiialbham. Ndabuka ndaza ndaphatha iimpahla zosana ezingekanxitywa—ekuphela kwezinto ezazindikhumbuza ngosana endiphulukene nalo. Kangangeeveki ingqondo yam yayingazinzanga. Ngezinye iintsuku ndandilila ndingayeki—nangona intsapho nabahlobo babendixhasa kangangoko banako. Maxa wambi, ndandidla ngokucinga ukuba ndishiywa ziingqondo. Kwakunzima ngakumbi ukuba phakathi kwabahlobo abakhulelweyo. Ngaphambilana, ndandidla ngokucinga ukuba ukuphunyelwa sisisu “yintlungu edlulayo” ebomini bebhinqa, into elibaleka ngokukhawuleza ingakhange ibangele iingxaki ezininzi. Hayi indlela endandiphazama ngayo!a

Uthando—Olona Ncedo Lusemagqabini

Ngokuhamba kwexesha, olona ncedo lwaba nemiphumo emihle yaba luthando lomyeni wam nolwamanye amaKristu. Elinye iNgqina lenza isidlo sangokuhlwa laza lasiphathela sona. Omnye umdala webandla kunye nomfazi wakhe baza neentyatyambo kunye nekhadi elibhalwe umyalezo wothando, yaye bachitha ingokuhlwa nathi. Sasiyazi indlela abaxakeke ngayo, ngoko ke indlela ababonisa ngayo ukuba bayakhathala yasichukumisa kakhulu. Nabanye abahlobo abaninzi bathumela iikhadi okanye iintyatyambo. Amazwi amafutshane athi “Asinilibalanga” ayethetha lukhulu! Elinye ilungu lebandla labhala lenjenje: “Ubomi sibujonga ngendlela uYehova abujonga ngayo—njengento exabiseke kakhulu. Ukuba uyazi xa ungqatyana ewela emhlabeni, ngokuqinisekileyo uyazi xa imveku engekazalwa isifa.” Umzala wam wabhala wenjenje: “Ummangaliso wokuzala nobomi usenza sithi khamnqa, kuba njalo naxa ungenzeki.”

Ngoxa ndandikwiHolo yoBukumkani kwiiveki ezimbalwa kamva, ndandinyembezana yaye kwafuneka ndiphume ngaphambi nje kokuba iintlanganiso ziqale. Abahlobo abanothando ababini abandibonayo xa ndiphuma ndizibambe ngeenkophe iinyembezi bahlala nam kwinqwelo-mafutha, bandibamba baza bandihlekisa. Kungekudala emva koko sobathathu sabuyela ngaphakathi. Hayi indlela ekuvuyisa ngayo ukuba nabahlobo ‘abanamathela ngokusondele ngakumbi kunomntakwenu’!—IMizekeliso 18:24.

Njengoko ezi ndaba zazisasazeka, ndamangaliswa kukwazi ukuba amaNgqina amaninzi akhe ajamelana nale meko. Kwanalawo ndandingasondelelananga kangako nawo ngaphambili akwazi ukundithuthuzela aza andomeleza ngendlela ekhethekileyo. Indlela andixhasa ngayo ngothando ngexesha endandiwafuna ngalo yandikhumbuza oko kuthethwa yiBhayibhile: “Iqabane lokwenyaniso lithanda ngamaxesha onke, yaye lingumzalwana ozalelwe ixesha lokubandezeleka.”—IMizekeliso 17:17.

Intuthuzelo Evela KwiLizwi LikaThixo

ISikhumbuzo sokufa kukaKristu sabakho emva kokuba kudlule iveki ndiphunyelwe sisisu. Ngenye ingokuhlwa ngoxa sasifunda ingxelo yeBhayibhile engeentsuku zokugqibela zikaYesu, kwathi qatha engqondweni yam ukuba: ‘UYehova uyayazi intlungu yokufelwa. Wafelwa ngunyana wakhe!’ Ekubeni uYehova enguBawo wethu wasezulwini, maxa wambi ndiye ndiyilibale indlela anovelwano nothando ngayo ngabakhonzi bakhe—abangamadoda nabangamabhinqa. Ngawo loo mzuzu ndaziva ndinoxolo lwengqondo. Ndaziva ndisondele ngakumbi kuYehova kunanini na ngaphambili.

Kwakhona ndakhuthazwa kakhulu ziimpapasho ezisekelwe eBhayibhileni, ingakumbi amanqaku adluleyo enkupho yeMboniselo noVukani! axubusha ngokufa komntu omthandayo. Ngokomzekelo, amanqaku aphantsi komxholo othi “Ukujamelana Nentlungu Yokufelwa Ngumntwana” kwinkupho kaVukani! ka-Agasti 8, 1987 aba luncedo kakhulu, njengoko yaba njalo nencwadana enemifanekiso ethi Xa Umntu Omthandayo Esifa.b

Ukuphela Kwentlungu

Njengoko ixesha lalihamba, ndaqonda ukuba intlungu yam iyaphela xa ndandikwazi ukuhleka ndize ndingaziva ndinetyala naxa ndandikwazi ukuncokola nabantu kodwa ndingayiguquli incoko ibe ngosana lwam endiphulukene nalo. Nangona kunjalo, ndandinawo amathuba endikhe ndizive ndibuhlungu ngawo, njengaxa ndibona abahlobo abangakhange bave ukuba ndiphunyelwe sisisu okanye xa intsapho enosana oluncinane ityelele iHolo yoBukumkani yethu.

Kwathi ngenye intsasa ndavuka ndivakalelwa kukuba loo ntlungu igqithile. Kwanaphambi kokuba ndivule amehlo, ndandivakalelwa kukuba loo ntlungu iphelile—ndandinoxolo nenzolo endingazange ndibe nayo kangangeenyanga. Sekunjalo, xa ndaphinda ndakhulelwa emva konyaka ndiphulukene nosana lwam, ndandidla ngokucinga ukuba kungenzeka ndiphinde ndiphunyelwe sisisu. Okuvuyisayo kukuba ndazala usana oluyinkwenkwe olusempilweni ngo-Oktobha 2001.

Ndisebuhlungu ngosana lwam endaphulukana nalo. Sekunjalo, la mava aye alwenza lwaqina uxabiso lwam ngobomi, ngentsapho yam, ngamanye amaKristu nangoThixo—osithuthuzelayo. Kwakhona, la mava aye abethelela engqondweni yam inyaniso engenakuphikwa yokuba asingoThixo othabatha abantwana bethu kodwa ‘sonke sehlelwa lixesha nasisihlo.’—INtshumayeli 9:11.

Hayi indlela endijonge phambili ngayo kwixesha apho uThixo eya kuphelisa lonke usizi, ukukhala, iingqaqambo kuquka nentlungu engokweemvakalelo ebangelwa kukuphuma kwesisu! (Isaya 65:17-23) Kuya kuthi ngelo xesha, bonke abantu abathobelayo bakwazi ukuthi: “Kufa, luphi na uloyiso lwakho? Kufa, luphi na ulwamvila lwakho?”—1 Korinte 15:55; Isaya 25:8.—Linikelwe.

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 29]

Ukuxhaphaka Noonobangela Bokuphuma Kwesisu

IThe World Book Encyclopedia ithi: “Uhlolisiso lubonisa ukuba amabhinqa akhulelweyo ali-15 ukusa kwangama-20 ekhulwini aphunyelwa sisisu. Kodwa amathuba okuphunyelwa sisisu maninzi gqitha kwiiveki zokuqala ezimbini emva kokukhawula (ukudibana kweqanda nembewu), ixesha apho inkoliso yamabhinqa ingaziyo ukuba ikhulelwe.” Enye incwadi ithi “kwiimeko ezingaphezu kwama-80 ekhulwini ukuphunyelwa sisisu kwenzeka kwiiveki zokuqala ezili-12 zokukhulelwa,” ekucingelwa ukuba isiqingatha sezo meko zibangelwa ziziphene ezikwimisontwana yeeseli zemveku engekazalwa. Ezi ziphene azibangelwa ziziphene ezifanayo nezo zikwimisontwana yeeseli zikamama okanye utata.

Abanye oonobangela bokuphuma kwesisu banokubangelwa yimpilo kamama. Iingcali zonyango zithi oku kunokubangelwa ngumonakalo okhoyo kwincindi yamadlala nakwinkqubo yomzimba yokulwa nezifo, izifo ezasulelayo kunye nokungahambi kakuhle kwezinto kumlomo wesibeleko okanye kwisibeleko sikamama. Izifo ezinganyangekiyo ezifana nesifo seswekile (ukuba azilawulwa ngendlela efanelekileyo) noxinezeleko lwegazi oluphezulu zinokuba ngabanye oonobangela.

Ngokutsho kweengcali, ukuphuma kwesisu akusoloko kubangelwa kukwenza imithambo, ukuphakamisa izinto ezinzima okanye ukuba neentlobano zesini. Akunakufane kwenzeke ukuba ukuwa, ukubetheka entweni kancinane okanye ukothuka kubangele ukuphuma kwesisu. Enye incwadi ithi: “Imveku engekazalwa ayifane yenzakale ngaphandle kokuba ingozi leyo inkulu kakhulu kangangokuba nobakho ubomi busengozini.” Hayi indlela ukwakhiwa kakuhle kwesibeleko okulubonisa ngayo uthando nobulumko boMdali wethu!—INdumiso 139:13, 14.

[Ibhokisi/Umfanekiso okwiphepha 31]

Indlela Enokunceda Ngayo Intsapho Nabahlobo

Maxa wambi kunzima ukuyazi into omele uyithethe okanye uyenze xa ilungu lentsapho okanye umhlobo ephunyelwa sisisu. Abantu basabela ngeendlela ezahlukahlukeneyo kwilahleko enjalo, ngoko ke abanakuthuthuzelwa okanye bancedwe ngendlela efanayo. Noko ke, khawuqwalasele la macebiso alandelayo.c

Izinto ezisengqiqweni eziluncedo onokuzenza:

◆ Cela ukunyamekela abantwana abadala.

◆ Lungiselela isidlo uze uphathele intsapho leyo.

◆ Mxhase nobawo. Omnye ubawo wathi, iindawo ezenza amakhadi emibuliso “aziwenzi amakhadi alungiselelwe ootata abakule meko.”

Izinto eziluncedo onokuzithetha:

◆ “Ndilusizi ukuva ukuba uphunyelwe sisisu.”

La mazwi anokuthetha lukhulu, yaye anokwenza ukuba ube namazwi entuthuzelo angakumbi.

◆ “Akukho nto imbi ngokukhala.”

Ngokufuthi umama ophunyelwe sisisu udla ngokuzibamba ngeenkophe iinyembezi kwiiveki okanye iinyanga zokuqala emva kweso siganeko. Mqinisekise ukuba uyamhlonela nokuba unokubonisa indlela avakalelwa ngayo.

◆ “Ngaba ndingakutsalela umnxeba kwiveki ezayo ukuze ndive indlela oqhuba ngayo?”

Ekuqaleni, kusenokwenzeka ukuba abantu abasentlungwini bavelwa ngabantu abaninzi, kodwa njengoko ixesha lihamba yaye beqhubeka bebuhlungu, banokuvakalelwa kukuba abanye abantu ababakhathalele. Yintw’ entle ukwazi ukuba uza kuqhubeka ubaxhasa. Intlungu yabo inokuqhubeka iiveki okanye iinyanga. Mhlawumbi baya kuziva bhetele emva kokufumana omnye umntwana.

◆ “Andazi ukuba ndingathini na.”

Ukuthetha loo mazwi kubhetele kunokuthi cwaka. Ukunyaniseka nobukho bakho kubonisa ukuba uyakhathala.

Izinto ongamele uzithethe:

◆ “Ungaphinda ube nolunye usana.”

Ngoxa oko kusenokuba yinyaniso, kunokudlulisela ingcamango yokuba akunaluvelwano. Abazali bebengafuni olunye usana, bebefuna olu. Ngaphambi kokuba bacinge ngokuba nolunye usana, kusenokwenzeka ukuba baya kuthanda ukuqala bazilele usana abaphulukene nalo.

◆ “Mhlawumbi bekukho into ephosakeleyo ngalo.”

Ngoxa kusenokuba kunjalo, le asinto ithuthuzelayo. Engqondweni kamama, ebekhulelwe usana olusempilweni.

◆ “Okubhetele kukuba akukhange ulwazi olu sana. Bekuya kuba nzima ngakumbi ukuba oku bekwenzeke kamva.”

Amabhinqa amaninzi aba nolwalamano oluqinileyo neentsana zawo ezingekazalwa kusekutsha. Ngoko xa olo sana lusifa, adla ngokuba buhlungu. Le ntlungu yenziwa nzulu ngakumbi kukwazi ukuba akakho omnye umntu “owazi” olu sana njengonina.

◆ “Okubhetele kukuba unabo abanye abantwana.”

Kubazali abasentlungwini, oku kunokufana nokuxelela umntu ophulukene nelungu lomzimba oku: “Okubhetele kukuba usenawo amanye amalungu.”

Kakade ke, kumele kuvunywe ukuba nabona bantu bakhathalayo nabanyanisekileyo bayawathetha amazwi ahlabayo ngamathuba athile. (Yakobi 3:2) Ngoko ke, amabhinqa anengqiqo aye aphunyelwa sisisu afanele abonakalise uthando lobuKristu aze angafukami ingqumbo ngabantu abathetha izinto ezibubudenge, kodwa abazimisele ukuthetha into efanelekileyo.—Kolose 3:13.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]