Ukungabikho Kootata—Ingxaki Eyandayo
LIYANDA inani lootata abashiya iintsapho zabo. Ngasekupheleni kweminyaka yee-1990, iphephandaba iUSA Today lathi iUnited States “lelona lizwe lineentsapho ezingenatata ehlabathini lonke.” Noko ke, ukungabikho kootata yingxaki egqugqise kulo lonke ihlabathi.
Ingxelo yobalo lwabantu yowama-2000 yadiza ukuba kwiintsapho zaseBrazil ezingama-44.7 ezigidi, ezili-11.2 lezigidi zinentloko-ntsapho engumama. ENicaragua, abantwana abangama-25 ekhulwini bahlala noonina kuphela. Ngeminyaka yee-1990, inani labantwana abangakhathalelwanga ngooyise eCosta Rica lanyuka ukususela kuma-21.1 ekhulwini laya kutsho kuma-30.4 ekhulwini.
Iingxelo ezivela kula mazwe mathathu yimizekelo nje embalwa yoko kwenzeka ehlabathini lonke. Khawucinge ngenye inkalo yale ngxaki yokungabikho kootata.
Bakho Kodwa Abayiphumezi Indima Yabo
Nceda ubone ibhokisi enomxholo othi “Uza Kubuya Nini Tata?” UNao, ngoku oneminyaka engama-23 ubudala uthi: “Ngaphambi kokuba ndiqalise isikolo, ndandingafane ndimbone uTata. Ngeny’ imini xa wayehamba ndamcenga ndathi ‘‘Ngaba uza kubuya?’”
Ulwalamano lwamalungu eentsapho, njengolwalamano lukaNao noyise, umbhali wasePoland uPiotr Szczukiewicz wathi: “Kubonakala ngathi eyona nto ibalulekileyo isilelayo entsatsheni yindima katata.” Yinyaniso ukuba ootata abaninzi bahlala neentsapho zabo yaye bayazondla. Sekunjalo, njengoko lisitsho iphephancwadi laseFransi iCapital, “ootata abaninzi bayazondla iintsapho zabo, kodwa abananxaxheba ekufundiseni abantwana.”
Ngokuqhelekileyo, nokuba utata ukho udla ngokungabi nanxaxheba koko kuqhubeka kubomi babantwana bakhe. Uxakeka zezinye izinto. “Nokuba [utata] uhlala nentsapho, uxakeka zezinye izinto,” litsho njalo iphephancwadi laseFransi iFamille chrétienne. Yintoni ebangela ukuba ootata abaninzi namhlanje bangazixhalabisi ngeemvakalelo zamalungu eentsapho zabo?
Njengoko lo lindixesha ungasentla esitsho, esona sizathu kukuba “abayiqondi indima katata okanye yendoda.” Ootata abaninzi bacinga ukuba utata ofanelekileyo ngulowo uza nemali eninzi ekhaya. Njengoko umbhali wasePoland uJózef Augustyn esitsho, “ootata abaninzi bacinga ukuba ukuza nemali eninzi ekhaya kubenza babe ngabazali abafanelekileyo.” Kodwa le asikokuphela kwembopheleleko katata.
Ingongoma kukuba, abantwana ababi naxabiso ngoyise ngenxa yemali aza nayo ekhaya okanye ngenxa yezipho abaphathela zona. Kunoko, eyona nto bayifunayo—luthando lukatata, ixesha nengqalelo yakhe—ngaphezu kwezipho abanika zona. Ezi zezona zinto zibalulekileyo kubo.
Bafanele Bahlole Iimeko Zabo
Ngokutsho kwengxelo yeJapanese Central Council for Education, “ukuba ootata bazinekele kakhulu kumsebenzi wabo wokuziphilisa bafanele bahlole indlela abaphila ngayo.” Umbuzo ngulo, Ngaba utata unokwenza uhlengahlengiso ngenxa yabantwana bakhe? Iphephandaba laseJamani iGießener Allgemeine lapapasha ingxelo yophando eyadiza ukuba ootata abaninzi bakhetha ukubeka umsebenzi wabo kwindawo yokuqala kunabantwana babo.
Abantwana basenokuba buhlungu xa bebona ngathi uyise akabakhathalelanga. ULidia, ngoku oneminyaka engama-21 ubudala uthi akakhumbuli kakuhle ukuba uyise wayenjani xa wayeseyintwazana encinane ePoland. Uthi: “Wayengafane ancokole nathi. Sasiphila kumazwe awahlukeneyo. Wayengazi nokuba ndizonwabisa kwiidisco.” Ngokufanayo, uMacarena waseSpeyin oneminyaka engama-21 ubudala uthi ngoxa wayesemncinane “uyise wayedla ngokuya kuzonwabisa nabahlobo bakhe ngeempela-veki, yaye wayekhe angabuyi kangangeentsuku.”
Ukubeka Izinto Eziza Kuqala Kwindawo Yazo
Ootata abaninzi basenokuphawula ukuba bachitha ixesha elincinane nabantwana babo yaye abanikeli ngqalelo ingako kubo. Utata waseJapan onomntwana oyinkwenkwe okwishumi elivisayo wathi: “Ndiyathemba ukuba umntwana wam uyayiqonda imeko yam. Nokuba ndixakekile, ndisoloko ndicinga ngaye.” Kodwa ngaba ukuba nethemba lokuba umntwana uyasiqonda isizathu sokuba uyise angabikho kuyayicombulula ingxaki?
Alithandabuzeki elokuba kufuneka umgudu—oko kukuthi ukuzincama—ukuze wanelise iintswelo zomntwana. Ngokucacileyo, ukunika abantwana eyona nto bayifuna ngokwenene—uthando, ixesha nengqalelo—akuyondlwan’ iyanetha. UYesu Kristu wathi: “Akaphili ngasonka sodwa [okanye ngokutya kodwa] umntu.” (Mateyu 4:4) Yinyaniso ukuba izinto ziphathekayo zizodwa azinakubanceda abantwana bakhule ngokuphumelelayo. Njengotata, ngaba uzimisele ukuncama into esenokuba ixabiseke gqitha kuwe—ixesha lakho mhlawumbi nesikhundla esiphambili emsebenzini—ukuze uchithe ixesha elingakumbi nabantwana bakho?
IMainichi Daily News kaFebruwari 10, 1986 yathetha ngotata owayeyiqonda indlela ababaluleke ngayo abantwana bakhe. Yathi: “Enye yeengqwayingqwayi zeJapanese National Railways (JNR) ikhethe ukurhoxa esikhundleni sayo kunokuba yahlukaniswe nentsapho yayo.” Eli phephandaba lacaphula le ngqwayingqwayi isithi: “Nabani na angawenza umsebenzi womlawuli-jikelele. Kodwa ndim kuphela utata wabantwana bam.”
Eneneni, inyathelo lokuqala lokuba ngutata ofanelekileyo kukuqonda uhlobo lotata abalufunayo abantwana. Makhe sihlole oko kubandakanyekileyo ekubeni ngutata abamfunayo abantwana.
[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 19]
“Uza Kubuya Nini Tata?”
Lo ngumbuzo intwazana eneminyaka emihlanu yaseJapan egama linguNao eyawubuza uyise njengoko wayehamba esiya emsebenzini ngeny’ imini. Nangona uyise wayehlala nabo, le ntwazana yayingafane imbone. Wayedla ngokubuya emsebenzini sele elele uNao aze ahambe engekavuki.