Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Kuthekani Ukuba Akavumi?

E BENGUMHLOBO wakho. Kodwa uye waqalisa ukumjonga ngenye indlela. Mhlawumbi kungenxa yesimilo sakhe okanye yindlela ancuma ngayo xa ethetha nawe ekwenze watsaleleka kuye. Enokuba yintoni na, ixesha liyahamba, akade alikhuphe elokuba uyakuthanda. Ngoko ugqiba kwelokuba uzicelele ukuba nithandane. Uphoxeka kakhulu kuba ngobubele kodwa eqinisekile akavumi.a

Ngokuzenzekelayo, intliziyo iba lihlwili. Kodwa mus’ ukukhathazeka ngokugqith’ emgceni; zama ukujonga izinto ngeliso elibanzi. Ewe, umfana uthe akanamdla wokuba nithandane. Yazi ukuba isigqibo asenzileyo asikwenzi ungaxabiseki njengomntu, okanye asibonisi ukuba awusathandwa okanye awusahlonitshwa ngabanye. Phofu ke, kusenokwenzeka ukuba isigqibo sakhe asinanto yakwenza nawe, kodwa mhlawumbi sibangelwa ziinjongo kwanosukelo lwakhe olwahlukileyo kolwakho.

Ukuba ungumKristu, usenokuba uyaqonda ukuba ‘uThixo akanantswela-bulungisa ukuba angawulibala umsebenzi wakho nothando olubonisayo ngegama lakhe.’ (Hebhere 6:10) USonjab ukubeka ngolu hlobo oku: “Usaxabisekile. Ubalulekile kuYehova njengomntu ongatshatanga.” Ekubeni uxabiseke kakhulu koYena Uphakamileyo nakwabanye abantu, kutheni ufanele uyeke ukuzihlonela?

Kusenokuba ngathi akuphumeleli okanye ucinge ukuba akulohlobo lokutshata. Kodwa ‘ukungalungi’ kwakho kulo mfana ngalo mzuzu akuthethi ukuba akakho oya kuze ‘ulunge’ kuye. (ABagwebi 14:3) Ngoko ke, kunokuba ucinge ukuba udlale nje ngexesha ngokuzifunela iqabane lomtshato, yazi ukuba imigudu oyenzileyo iphumele kwinto enye eyingenelo: Uyazi ukuba anifanelani nalo mfana. Kutheni sisitsho?

Ngaba Benifanelana?

IBhayibhile iyalela amadoda ukuba “athande abafazi bawo njengemizimba yawo.” (Efese 5:28) Iwayalela nokuba ‘abanike imbeko.’ (1 Petros 3:7) Ngoko ke, kule meko, lo mfana usenokuba ukuxabisa ngokwenene njengomhlobo. Kodwa ngokungavumi kwakhe, ubekubonisa ukuba akakulungelanga ukuba nithandane nokukunika imbeko njengomfazi wakhe. Unelungelo lokugqiba ngolo hlobo. Khawucinge ngoku: Ukuba uvakalelwa ngolo hlobo, ucinga ukuba uyafaneleka njengomyeni wakho? Khawucinge ngendlela ongenakonwaba ngayo xa unokutshata nomntu ongakuthandiyo nongakuxabisiyo njengoko iZibhalo zisitsho!

Kunokukunceda nokuphinda umjonge lo mfana, ekubeni ephelile amathemba okuba ningathandana. Maxa wambi intabatheko imenza ubani angawaboni amakhwiniba omntu okanye ubuthathaka bakhe bokomoya ababubonayo abanye. Ngokomzekelo, ngaba ebekubona ukuba uyamthanda, okanye uthe eyibona indlela ovakalelwa ngayo wakhulisa iimvakalelo zakho ngabom ngokuqhubeka ebonana nawe? Ukuba wenze njalo, ngaba loo nto ayikuxeleli ukuba akakakulungeli ukuba ngumyeni ongumKristu onolwazelelelo nonovelwano? Ukuba kunjalo, uncedile ukuqonde oko, ngoxa kusenokuba buhlungu.

Uthando lukaMarcia lwavuselelwa kukuba umfana othile waqalisa ukumnika ingqalelo ekhethekileyo. Xa wabuza lo mfana ngeenjongo zakhe, wamxelela ukuba akanamdla wokuba bathandane. Yintoni eyamncedayo ukuze akwazi ukuhlangabezana noko kuphoxeka? Uthi, “Ndancedwa kukusebenzisa ingqondo kungekhona ukuqhutywa ziimvakalelo.” Ukukhumbula izinto iBhayibhile ethi indoda ifanele izenze kwamnceda waqonda ukuba loo mfana wayengafaneleki njengomyeni wakhe. Oku kwamxolisa.

NakuAndrea kwenzeka okufanayo ngomnye umfana. Kamva wafumanisa ukuba izinto ezenziwa ngulo mfana kuye zibonisa ukuba akakakhuli engqondweni. Waqonda ukuba lo mfana wayengekakulungeli ukutshata, yaye uyambulela uYehova ngokumenza akubone oko. Uthi, “Ndicinga ukuba uYehova unokukukhusela kwizinto ezinokukwaphula intliziyo, kodwa ufanele umthembe.” Kakade ke, kwiimeko ezininzi umfana unokuziphatha ngesidima aze angavumi ngezizathu ezifanelekileyo. Sekunjalo, unokuhlangabezana njani nemiphumo yokuba engavumanga?

Oko Unokukwenza Ngendlela Ovakalelwa Ngayo

Kusenokufuneka ixesha ukuze uyamkele into yokuba akavumanga. Uye waya umthanda ngokuhamba kwexesha, ngokufanayo, ngokuya ixesha lihamba uza kude umlibale. Uthando alufane luthi pam okomlilo weendiza. Ngezinye iintsuku usenokubonakala ungakwazi ukuzilawula! Zicenge. Loo ndlela uvakalelwa ngayo iya kuphela ngokuhamba kwexesha. Kodwa ukuba ufuna iphele ngokukhawuleza, kulumkele ukucinga ngezinto eziya kubangela ukuba uhlale uvakalelwa ngaloo ndlela.

Ngokomzekelo, musa ukube ucinga ukuba uthethe okanye wenze into ephosakeleyo ngoxa ubuzityand’ igila kuye. Ukuba uhlala usetyisa ezo zinto, usenokucinga ukuba ebengazimiselanga ukwala okanye uzixelele ukuba xa unokuzama ukuthetha naye ngenye indlela unokuvuma. Samkele isibakala sokuba awunakuyitshintsha indlela avakalelwa ngayo. Kunokwenzeka ukuba enoba ubumvele ngayiphi indlela, ebeya kukuxelela into efanayo.

Omnye umgibe kukuba nemibono. Unombono wenu nonwabile bonke ubomi benu emva kokuba nitshatile. Loo maphupha asenokubonakala ethuthuzela, kodwa akayonyaniso. Ukuphela kwawo, ibuya yonke ingcinga yokuba lo mfana akavumanga, uyadandatheka kwakhona. Loo maphupha alandelwa yintlungu enganyamezelekiyo awanakuphela ngaphandle kokuba uzame ukuwaphelisa.

Zabalazela ukuwakhupha loo maphupha engqondweni. Xa efika, phakama uhambe. Yenza umsebenzi othile—into eza kuphazamisa ingqondo. Nikel’ ingqalelo kwizinto ezakhayo, kungekhona kwizinto ezikudandathekisayo. (Filipi 4:8) Ekuqaleni kunokuba nzima, kodwa ngokuhamba kwexesha, uya kuphumelela uze ube noxolo lwengqondo.

Unokuncedwa nayinkxaso yabahlobo abasondeleyo kuwe. (IMizekeliso 17:17) Noko ke, uSonja ulumkisa ngelithi: “Akuyi kuncedakala ukuba bonke abahlobo bakho abatshatanga, ningoontanga, yaye nonke nifuna ukutshata. Kufuneka ube nabo nabahlobo abadala kuwe, abanokukunceda ujonge izinto ngeliso elibanzi.” Khumbula, kukho umntu onokukunceda ngakumbi ekupheliseni intlungu onayo.

UYehova—Umhlobo Nomthombo Wenkxaso

Xa enye indoda ethembekileyo yamandulo yadimazekayo, yathandaza kuYehova icela uncedo. Waba yintoni umphumo? Yabhala: “Nanini na ndinxunguphele yaye ndikhathazekile, uyandithuthuzela undenze ndibe nemihlali.” (INdumiso 94:19, Today’s English Version) Nawe uYehova uya kukuthuthuzela aze akomeleze ukuba uthandaza kuye unokholo. NoAndrea wathandaza. Uthi, “Umthandazo uluncedo kakhulu ekupheliseni intlungu onayo ukuze ubomi bakho bungemi ndawonye.” NoSonja uthi xa ethetha ngomthandazo, “Uya kukunceda uzive uxabisekile, enoba abanye bayakuthanda okanye abakufuni.”

Akukho mntu unokuyiqonda ngokupheleleyo indlela ovakalelwa ngayo, kodwa uYehova uyayiqonda. Wabadala abantu banomnqweno wokutshata nabantu ababathandayo. Uyayazi indlela okunamandla ngayo ukuthanda umntu, yaye uyayazi nendlela yokulawula olo thando. Unokukunceda woyise intlungu okuyo, kuba eyoku-1 kaYohane 3:20 ithi: “UThixo mkhulu kuneentliziyo zethu yaye uyazazi zonke izinto.”

Yiba Ngolungeleleneyo

Umtshato unokuba ngumthombo wolonwabo, kodwa asinguwo kuphela olubangelayo. Bonke abantu abakhonza uYehova bonwabile, asingobantu batshatileyo kuphela abonwabileyo. Kwelinye icala, abantu abangatshatanga banamathuba okwenza izinto abangenakuzenza abo batshatileyo. Abanayo ‘imbandezelo enyameni’ echazwe kweyoku-1 yabaseKorinte 7:28. Le mbandezelo kuthethwa ngayo luxinezeleko namagingxigingxi abatyhubela kuwo bonke abantu abatshatileyo. Kwakhona abantu abangatshatanga banenkululeko yokwenza nantoni na abayifunayo yaye ubomi babo banokubusebenzisa enkonzweni kaYehova. Ngenxa yoko, iBhayibhile isifundisa oku: “Lowo unikela ubunyulu bakhe emtshatweni wenza kakuhle, kodwa lowo ungabunikeliyo emtshatweni uya kuba wenza kakuhle ngakumbi.” (1 Korinte 7:38) Enoba ukunqwenela ngamandla ukutshata, ukucamngca ngezi mfundiso zeBhayibhile kunokukunceda uhlale ulungelelene uze ubunandiphe ngakumbi ubomi khona ngoku.

Abahlobo bokwenene banokukuxelela oku, “Ungakhathazeki, ngenye imini uza kumfumana umntu okuthandayo.” Yaye liyinyaniso elokuba ukwaliwa ngumntu omnye akuthethi kuthi akakho oya kuze akufune. Sekunjalo, elinye ibhinqa eliselula elingumKristu uCandace lithi: “Ndiyamthemba uYehova. Andilindelanga ukuba andinike umyeni ukuze ndonwabe. Kodwa ndiyazi ukuba uya kundinika loo nto ifunekayo ukuze ndizalise esi sikhewu.” Ukucinga ngale ndlela kuye kwamnceda woyisa ukuphoxeka ngenxa yokungavunywa.

Kweli hlabathi zisoloko zisilela iinzame zokufumana othile oza kukuthanda, kunjalo nangemitshato emininzi. Ukuba uthembela kuYehova uze uthobele umyalelo wakhe, uya kukunceda uvuye endaweni yokuphoxeka. Unokuba namava afana nakaKumkani uDavide, owabhala wenjenje: “Owu Yehova, uphambi kwakho wonke umnqweno wam, yaye ukuncwina kwam akufihlwanga kuwe. Kuba ndandilindele kuwe, Yehova; wena wandiphendula, Yehova Thixo wam.”—INdumiso 38:9, 15.

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

[Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 14]

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