Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Kutheni Nditsaleleka Kubantu Abanempembelelo Embi?

“Ndandisazi ukuba ndandingafanele ndiqhelane naye gqitha, kodwa yiloo nto kanye endayivumela yenzeka. Ndandingakholelwa ukuba kukho indoda enokufuna ukuchitha ixesha kunye nam.”—UNancy.a

“Ndandidla ngokuya ndedwa kumdlalo wokutyibilika ngezihlangu ezinamavili, yaye kungekudala ndaqalisa ukusoloko ndikunye ‘nabahlobo’ endazenzela bona apho. Kungabanga thuba lide, ndaziphatha kakubi.”—UDan.

BOBABINI uNancy noDan ekuqaleni babomelele ngokomoya. UNancy wayekhulele kwintsapho ehlonel’ uThixo yaye waqalisa ukushumayela xa wayeneminyaka esithoba ubudala. UDan waqalisa ukuba nguvulindlela esekwishumi elivisayo. Sekunjalo, bobabini baba neengxaki ezinzulu ngokomoya. Yintoni eyabangela ezo ngxaki? Banxulumana nabantu abanempembelelo embi.

Ngaba wakha wazifumana utsaleleke kumntu omazi kakuhle ukuba usenokukonakalisa? Loo mntu usenokuba wawufunda naye yaye ninomdla kwizinto ezifanayo—okanye kusenokwenzeka ukuba yayingumntu wesini esahlukileyo owawutsaleleke kuye.

Kusenokuba uyasikhumbula isiluleko seBhayibhile esithi: “Unxulumano olubi lonakalisa imikhwa elungileyo.” (1 Korinte 15:33) Kodwa ngaba bonke abantu abangamnquliyo uYehova bazizinxulumani ezibi? Kuthekani ukuba baneempawu ezithandekayo kwanezincomekayo? Kanti kuthekani ukuba omnye umKristu akamiseli mzekelo mhle ngokomoya? Ngaphambi kokuba siphendule loo mibuzo, makhe siqwalasele indlela abanye abatsaleleka ngayo kubantu abanjalo yaye nesizathu soko.

Yintoni Ebangela Ubani Atsaleleke Kubantu Abanjalo?

Ekubeni bonke abantu benziwe ngokomfanekiso kaThixo, kulindelekile ukuba abanye babantu abangamaziyo uYehova babonise iimpawu ezintle. Ngenxa yoko, uya kufumanisa abanye abantu behlonelwa, bethandeka, nangona bengengobanquli boThixo oyinyaniso. Ngaba ufanele ubaphephe ngokupheleleyo abo bantu kuba nje bengazazi iinyaniso zeBhayibhile? Akunjalo. Xa iBhayibhile isiluleka ukuba “masenze okulungileyo kubo bonke,” oko kuquka nabo baneenkolelo ezahlukileyo kwezethu njengamaKristu. (Galati 6:10) Ngoko ke, ngokubakhetha kakuhle abantu onxulumana nabo oko akuthethi kuthi ufanele uzive ubalasele kunabanye. (IMizekeliso 8:13; Galati 6:3) Ikhondo elinjalo liya kubonisa ukuzityeshela iinkolelo zamaKristu.

Phofu ke, olunye ulutsha olungamaKristu, luye lwagabadela; lwakha ulwalamano olusenyongweni nabantu abangenamdla ungako okanye abangenawo kwaukuba nawo kwizinto zokomoya. UDan, okhankanywe ngaphambilana, wayebalasele kumdlalo wokutyibilika ngezihlangu ezinamavili. Abantu awayeqalise ukusoloko enxulumana nabo kwindawo yokutyibilika yasekuhlaleni babengengawo amaKristu. Ukusuk’ apho, uDan wayehamba “nabahlobo” bakhe abatsha baye kuziphatha kakubi baze basebenzise iziyobisi. Akubona ukuba akasaphili njengomKristu, uDan wayeka ukushumayela waza wayeka nokuya kwiintlanganiso zebandla. Kwathabatha iminyaka ngaphambi kokuba atshintshe aze abuyele kunqulo lokwenyaniso.

UMelanie wayetsaleleke komnye umKristu owayebuthathaka ngokomoya. UMelanie uyachaza: “Ndaxelelwa ukuba ufuna ukukhuthazwa, ngoko ndaqalisa ukunxulumana naye.” Kakade ke, iBhayibhile ikhuthaza amaKristu isithi “baxhaseni ababuthathaka.” (1 Tesalonika 5:14) Kodwa uMelanie waqalisa ukuhamba nomhlobo wakhe omtsha xa esiya ezibharini, apho ezinye izinxulumani zamkhokelela ekubeni aziphathe ngendlela elihlazo.

Ikhaya Okhulele Kulo Linendima Eliyidlalayo

Imeko okhulele kuyo isenokuba negalelo kubantu otsaleleka kubo. UMichelle ebesoloko ezibuza isizathu sokuba atsaleleke kubafana abangenazimvakalelo ngaye nabangakhathaliyo. Wathi bamkhumbuza uyise, owayengenalwamano lusondeleyo naye nowayengenaxesha lakhe. Ukholelwa ukuba ukuze azive amkelekile aze afumane ingqalelo wayeziqhelanisa namadoda angafikelelekiyo yaye wayetsaleleka kubuhlobo obunjalo.

Ngokwahlukileyo koko, umntu oselula okhuliswe ngabazali abangamaKristu usenokufun’ ukwazi indlela abanye abaphila ngayo, evakalelwa kukuba abazali bakhe bamkhusele ngokugqithiseleyo. Enoba kunjalo okanye akunjalo, ngaba ukunxulumana ‘nabahlobo behlabathi’ kusisicombululo? (Yakobi 4:4) Qwalasela oko kwenzeka kuBill.

Nangona xa wayemncinane wafundiswa iZibhalo ngunina, uBill wakhetha ukungabahluleli ubomi bakhe kuYehova, evakalelwa kukuba ukwenza njalo kuya kumbandeza inkululeko. Efuna ukuzivela ngokwakhe indlela ubomi obuyiyo engasenguye umKristu wokwenyaniso, waqalisa ukunxulumana neqela lemiguvela elamkhokelela ekubeni asebenzise iziyobisi, abe ndlongondlongo, aze abe sisaphuli-mthetho. Ngenxa yokuba amapolisa ayemsukela ehamba ngesantya esiphezulu, wenzakala yaye kangangeenyanga wafa isiqaqa. Oogqirha babecinga ukuba uza kufa. Okuvuyisayo kukuba, uBill wachacha. Kodwa uyimfama kwaye ungumlwelwe. Wafunda kabuhlungu yaye ngoku ungumKristu ozahluleleyo. Kodwa uBill waqonda ukuba ukufunda ‘kabuhlungu’ kuba nemiphumo engapheliyo.

Ezinye Izinto Eziyimpembelelo

Maxa wambi amajelo ezolonwabo ayayiphembelela imbono yolutsha ngomhlobo ofanelekileyo. Ngokomzekelo, asiyonto ingaqhelekanga ngeencwadi, iinkqubo zikamabonwakude, imifanekiso eshukumayo, neevidiyo zomculo ukubonisa iqhawe elibonakala lingqwabalala okanye likrwada ekuqaleni kodwa kamva libonakala lineempawu ezintle. Enyanisweni into ebethelelwayo kukuba abantu ababonakala benolunya nabazingcayo, basenokuba ngabantu abakhathalayo nabanenyameko. Ukongezelela, le mbono ibonisa ukuba umhlobo osenyongweni, ngokukodwa umntu wesini esahlukileyo, uyafuneka ukuze ubani avelise ezi mpawu zintle. Kuyavunywa ukuba, loo nto ibangela ukuba abantu bazithenge ezi vidiyo nomculo onjalo. Noko ke, kukangaphi imibandela yothando iba njalo kubomi bokwenene? Okulusizi kukuba, olunye ulutsha luye lukhohliswe zezo ngcinga zingcolileyo luze luzakhele ubuhlobo—lude lutshate—nabantu abazithandayo, abandlongondlongo, luze lulindele ukuba abo bantu baza “kutshintsha” nto leyo engenzekiyo.

Qwalasela nje esinye isizathu esibangela ukuba abanye batsaleleke kubantu abanempembelelo embi: Baziva bengathandwa ngoko ke bamkela nabani na obonisa uthando kubo. UNancy, okhankanywe ngaphambilana, wayekwazi oko iBhayibhile ikutshoyo ngokutshata “kuphela eNkosini.” (1 Korinte 7:39) Sekunjalo, wayesoloko ecinga ukuba akamhlanga kwaye wakhohliseka xa othile awayesebenza naye wacel’ uthando. Waqalisa ukuzikhupha kunye naye yaye baphantse baziphatha kakubi ngokwesini.

Njengokuba la mava angasentla ebonisa, kukho izizathu ezininzi ezibangela ukuba ulutsha olungamaKristu luzive lusondelelene nabantu abanokulonakalisa—yaye kubonakala kukho iindlela ezininzi zokuzithethelela ngokuzenzela ubuhlobo obusenyongweni nabantu abanjalo. Sekunjalo, ubuhlobo obunjalo buzisa ukubandezeleka okungenakuphepheka, kwanemiphumo eyingozi. Yintoni ebangela loo nto?

Ubuhlobo Bunamandla

Inyaniso ikukuba, uba njengabahlobo bakho. Ngale ndlela abo sichitha ixesha kunye nabo basenokuba nempembelelo enamandla kuthi. IMizekeliso 13:20 ibonisa ukuba basenokusiphembelela kakuhle okanye kakubi: “Ohamba nezilumko uya kuba sisilumko naye, kodwa osebenzisana neziyatha uya kuhlelwa bububi.” Abahlobo abasenyongweni, njengabantu ababini bekhwele emotweni enye, bethanda bengathandi baya kwicala elinye yaye bafika kunye apho bebesingise khona. Ngoko ke, zibuze: ‘Ngaba le ndlela umhlobo wam ahamba kuyo iya apho nam ndifuna ukuya khona? Ngaba iya kundenza ndilufikelele usukelo lwam lokomoya neminqweno endinayo?’

Kuyavunywa ukuba, ukuzihlola ngokunyanisekileyo kusenokuba nzima. Oku kusenokubandakanya iimvakalelo. Kodwa ngaba sifanele sikhokelwe ziimvakalelo kuphela xa sikhetha abahlobo? Usenokuphulaphula icebiso eliqhelekileyo elithi, “Hamba ngoyibonayo.” Kodwa IMizekeliso 28:26 ithi: “Okholosa ngentliziyo yakhe usisiyatha.” Kutheni kunjalo nje? Kungenxa yokuba “intliziyo inenkohliso kunayo nantoni na yaye iyatyhudisa.” (Yeremiya 17:9; Numeri 15:39) Ukuba nenkohliso kukunganyaniseki okanye ukuxoka. Ngaba ungamthemba umntu owaziwa ngokukhohlisa okanye umngcatshi? Intliziyo yethu yokomfuziselo isenokusikhohlisa. Ngaloo ndlela, ubuhlobo ayibi bobakhayo kuba nje sivakalelwa ukuba bulungile.

Olona khokelo lunokuthenjwa liLizwi likaThixo. Kunentliziyo yakho engafezekanga, imigaqo eseBhayibhileni ayisoze ikudanise. Imigaqo eseBhayibhileni inokukunceda njani ukuze ubone enoba ubani unokuba ngumhlobo ofanelekileyo? Yaye ungakuphepha njani ukukhetha umhlobo ongafanelekanga noza kuhlala naye ubomi bakho bonke—iqabane lomtshato? Le mibuzo iza kuqwalaselwa kumanqaku alandelayo.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 12]

Amajelo osasazo anokuyiphembelela imbono yethu ngomhlobo ofanelekileyo