Isahluko 15
Ukwakha Intsapho Ebeka UThixo
1-3. Kutheni abanye bengakwazi ukucombulula iingxaki eziqhelekileyo emtshatweni nasekukhuliseni abantwana, kodwa kutheni iBhayibhile inokunceda?
MASITHI uceba ukuzakhela indlu. Uthenga umhlaba. Uzimisele, uzakhela umfanekiso-ngqondweni wendlu yakho entsha. Kodwa kuthekani ukuba akunazo izixhobo zokwakha yaye nobuchule bokwakha akunabo? Hayi indlela imigudu yakho ebiya kutyhafisa ngayo!
2 Izibini ezininzi zingenela umtshato zinomfanekiso-ngqondweni wentsapho eyonwabileyo, kodwa zingenazo izixhobo okanye ubuchule obufunekayo bokuyakha. Ngokukhawuleza emva kosuku lomtshato, kuqalisa imikhwa engathandekiyo. Ukulwa nokuxabana kuba sisonka semihla ngemihla. Xa kuzalwa abantwana, lo bawo nomama abatsha bazifumanisa bengenabo ubuchule bokuba ngabazali kanye njengokuba bengenabo nangomtshato.
3 Noko ke, okuvuyisayo kukuba iBhayibhile inokunceda. Imigaqo yayo ifana nezixhobo ezinokukunceda wakhe intsapho eyonwabileyo. (IMizekeliso 24:3) Makhe sibone ukuba ikwenza njani oku.
IZIXHOBO ZOKWAKHA UMTSHATO OWONWABISAYO
4. Kutheni zimele zilindelwe iingxaki emtshatweni, yaye yiyiphi imilinganiselo enikelwayo eBhayibhileni?
4 Kungakhathaliseki ukuba isibini esitshatileyo sifanelana kakuhle kangakanani na, sahlukile kwindlela esenziwe ngayo ngokweemvakalelo, ngamava esaba nawo ebuntwaneni, nangemvelaphi yentsapho. Ngoko ke, iingxaki ezithile zimele zilindelwe emva komtshato. Ziya kusingathwa njani? Kaloku, xa abakhi besakha indlu, bajonga iplani. Le inikela imigaqo emele ilandelwe. IBhayibhile inikela imigaqo kaThixo yokwakha intsapho eyonwabileyo. Ngoku makhe sihlole embalwa yayo.
5. IBhayibhile ikubethelela njani ukubaluleka kokunyaniseka emtshatweni?
5 Ukunyaniseka. UYesu wathi: “Oko ke ngoko uThixo akumanyileyo, makungahlulwa mntu.”a (Mateyu 19:6) Umpostile uPawulos wabhala: “Umtshato mawubekeke ngeendlela zonke, nesilili masingadyojwa; ke abenza umbulo nabakrexezi, uThixo uya kubagweba.” (Hebhere 13:4) Ngoko ke abantu abatshatileyo bafanele bazive benembopheleleko kuYehova yokuba bahlale bethembekile kumaqabane abo.—Genesis 39:7-9.
6. Ukunyaniseka kuya kunceda njani ekulondolozeni umtshato?
6 Ukunyaniseka kuwenza umtshato ube nesidima yaye unqabiseke. Amaqabane anyanisekileyo ayazi ukuba, nokuba kunokwenzeka ntoni na, aya kuxhasana. (INtshumayeli 4:9-12) Hayi indlela oku okwahluke ngayo kwabo bashiya imitshato yabo zisaqala nje ukuvela iinkathazo! Abantu abanjalo bakhawuleza bagqibe kwelokuba ‘abazange bakhethe kakuhle,’ yaye ‘abasathandani,’ yaye isicombululo iya kuba kukufuna iqabane elitsha. Kodwa oku akuniki naliphi na iqabane ithuba lokukhula. Kunoko, abo banganyanisekanga banjalo basenokudlulela kumaqabane amatsha neengxaki ezifanayo. Xa umntu enekhaya elihle kodwa afumanise ukuba uphahla luyavuza, ngokuqinisekileyo uzama ukululungisa. Akasuki nje afudukele kwenye indlu. Ngokufanayo, ukutshintsha iqabane akuyondlela yokucombulula iimbambano ezibangela iingxaki zomtshato. Xa kuvela iingxaki, musa ukuzama ukuphuncuka kuloo mtshato, kodwa sebenza ngamandla ukuze uwulondoloze. Ukunyaniseka okunjalo kubonisa ukuwugqala umtshato njengento efanele ukulondolozwa, igcinwe ize ixatyiswe.
7. Kutheni ngokufuthi kunzima ngabantu abatshatileyo ukunxibelelana, kodwa ukwambatha ‘ubuntu obutsha’ kunokunceda njani?
7 Unxibelelwano. Umzekeliso weBhayibhile uthi: “Iingcinga ziyatshitsha ngokungabikho kokucweya.” (IMizekeliso 15:22) Sekunjalo, unxibelelwano lunzima kwizibini ezithile ezitshatileyo. Kutheni kunjalo? Kungenxa yokuba abantu baneendlela ezahlukahlukeneyo zonxibelelwano. Esi sibakala ngokufuthi sikhokelela ekubeni kubekho ukungaqondani nonxunguphalo. Indlela umntu awakhula ngayo inokuba negalelo koku. Ngokomzekelo, bambi basenokuba bakhulela phakathi kwabazali abasoloko bexabana. Ngoku njengabantu abadala abatshatileyo, basenokungakwazi ukuthetha neqabane labo ngendlela yobubele neyothando. Sekunjalo, ikhaya lakho akuyomfuneko ukuba lide libe ‘yindlu ezele yimbambano.’ (IMizekeliso 17:1) IBhayibhile ibethelela ukwambatha ‘ubuntu obutsha,’ yaye ayibukhuthazi ubukrakra, ingxolo nonyeliso.—Efese 4:22-24, 31.
8. Yintoni enokuba luncedo xa ningavisisani neqabane lakho?
8 Unokwenza ntoni xa kukho ukungavisisani? Xa niqalisa ukuba nomsindo, uya kuba wenza kakuhle ukuba ulandela icebiso leMizekeliso 17:14: “Yiyeke imbambano kungekavunganyelwana.” Ewe, ingxubusho ninokuyibekela elinye ixesha, xa wena neqabane lakho senipholile. (INtshumayeli 3:1, 7) Nokuba imeko iyintoni na, zabalazela ‘ukwenza msinya ukuva, wenze kade ukuthetha, wenze kade ukuqumba.’ (Yakobi 1:19) Usukelo lwakho lufanele lube kukulungisa imeko, kungekhona ukoyisa kwingxoxo. (Genesis 13:8, 9) Khetha amazwi nendlela yokuthetha eya kukugcina wena neqabane lakho nizolile. (IMizekeliso 12:18; 15:1, 4; 29:11) Ngaphezu kwako konke, musani ukuhlala nicaphukile, kodwa funani uncedo ngokunxibelelana noThixo ngokuthandaza kunye ngokuthobekileyo.—Efese 4:26, 27; 6:18.
9. Kutheni kunokuthiwa unxibelelwano luqala entliziyweni?
9 Umzekeliso weBhayibhile uthi: “Intliziyo yesilumko iyawuqiqisa umlomo waso, yongeze imfundiso emilebeni yomlomo waso.” (IMizekeliso 16:23) Ngokwenene ke ngoko, isikhokelo sokunxibelelana ngokuphumelelayo sisentliziyweni, kungekhona emlonyeni. Sinjani isimo sakho sengqondo ngakwiqabane lakho? IBhayibhile ikhuthaza amaKristu ukuba abonise ‘imfesane.’ (1 Petros 3:8) Ngaba unokukwenza oku xa iqabane lakho lityhubela amaxhala abangela uxinezeleko? Ukuba unako, kuya kukunceda ukwazi ukuphendula.—Isaya 50:4.
10, 11. Indoda inokusisebenzisa njani isiluleko esikweyoku-1 kaPetros 3:7?
10 Imbeko nentlonelo. Amadoda angamaKristu axelelwa ukuba ahlale nabafazi bawo ‘ngokokwazi, embeka umfazi, njengesona sitya siethe-ethe.’ (1 Petros 3:7) Ukubeka umfazi kabani kubandakanya ukuyiqonda indlela axabiseke ngayo. Indoda ehlala nomfazi wayo “ngokokwazi” iyazixabisa iimvakalelo zakhe, izinto abalaseleyo kuzo, ubukrelekrele, nesidima sakhe. Ikwafanele ifune ukufunda indlela uYehova abajonga ngayo abafazi nafuna baphathwe ngayo.
11 Endlwini yakho, masithi unesitya esiluncedo kakhulu kodwa esiethe-ethe. Ngaba ubungayi kusiphatha ngenyameko enkulu? Ngoko ke, uPetros wasebenzisa igama elithi ‘isitya esiethe-ethe’ ngendlela efanayo, yaye oku kufanele kushukumisele indoda engumKristu ekubeni imbonise ulwazelelelo umfazi wayo emthandayo.
12. Umfazi unokubonisa njani ukuba uyihlonela ngokunzulu indoda yakhe?
12 Kodwa iBhayibhile inikela siphi isiluleko kumfazi? UPawulos wabhala: “Umfazi ke makayoyike [“makayihlonele ngokunzulu,” NW] indoda.” (Efese 5:33) Kanye njengokuba umfazi efuna ukuziva ebekwa yaye ethandwa ngokunzulu liqabane lakhe, indoda ifuna ukuziva ihlonelwa ngumfazi wayo. Umfazi onentlonelo akayi kuhamba ebhengeza iimpazamo zendoda yakhe, enoba ingumKristu okanye ayinguye. Akayi kuyihlutha isidima sayo ngokuyigxeka okanye ngokuyijongela phantsi enokuba kungasese okanye kusesidlangalaleni.—1 Timoti 3:11; 5:13.
13. Iimbono zinokuvakaliswa njani ngendlela yoxolo?
13 Oku akuthethi ukuba umfazi akanakuzivakalisa izimvo zakhe. Ukuba kukho into emphazamisayo, ngentlonelo unokuyichaza. (Genesis 21:9-12) Ukudlulisela ingcamango kwindoda yakhe kunokufaniswa nokuyiphosela ibhola. Unokuyiphosa kakuhle ukuze ikwazi ukuyibamba, okanye unokuyigibisela ngamandla kangangokuba iyenzakalise. Hayi indlela ekuba kuhle ngakumbi ngayo xa omabini amaqabane ekuphepha ukutyholana kodwa, kunoko, ethetha ngobubele nangothantamiso!—Mateyu 7:12; Kolose 4:6; 1 Petros 3:3, 4.
14. Ufanele wenze ntoni ukuba iqabane lakho alibonisi mdla kangako ekusebenziseni imigaqo yeBhayibhile emtshatweni?
14 Njengoko sesibonile, imigaqo yeBhayibhile inokukunceda wakhe umtshato owonwabisayo. Kodwa kuthekani ukuba iqabane lakho alinamdla kangako koko kuthethwa yiBhayibhile? Kusenokufezwa lukhulu ukuba uyalusebenzisa ulwazi ngoThixo kwindima yakho. UPetros wabhala: “Nina bafazi, wathobeleni awenu amadoda, ukuze kuthi, nokuba kukho kuwo angalivayo ilizwi, athi ngehambo yabafazi, lingekho ilizwi, azuzeke; ebonela ihambo yenu enyulu, enoloyiko [“enentlonelo enzulu,” NW].” (1 Petros 3:1, 2) Kakade ke, oku kuya kusebenza nakwindoda enomfazi ongenamdla eBhayibhileni. Kungakhathaliseki ukuba iqabane lakho likhetha ntoni, vumela imigaqo yeBhayibhile ikwenze wena ube liqabane elilunge ngakumbi. Ulwazi ngoThixo lunokukwenza kwanomzali olunge ngakumbi.
UKUKHULISA ABANTWANA NGOKUVISISANA NOLWAZI NGOTHIXO
15. Maxa wambi iindlela zokukhulisa abantwana eziphosakeleyo zidluliselwa njani, kodwa kunokupheliswa njani oku?
15 Ukuba nesarha okanye ihamile akumenzi umntu abe ngumchweli onobuchule. Ngokufanayo, ukuba nabantwana akumenzi ubani abe ngumzali onobuchule. Enoba bakwenza besazi okanye bengazi, ngokufuthi abazali babakhulisa abantwana babo ngendlela nabo abakhuliswa ngayo. Ngaloo ndlela, maxa wambi iindlela zokukhulisa abantwana eziphosakeleyo zidluliselwa kwesinye isizukulwana zisuka kwesinye. Umzekeliso wesiHebhere wamandulo uthi: “Ooyise badle iidiliya ezimuncu, kwaba buthelezi amazinyo oonyana.” Ukanti, iZibhalo zibonisa ukuba akunyanzelekanga ukuba umntu alandele ikhondo elamiselwa ngabazali bakhe. Unokukhetha umendo owahlukileyo, ophenjelelwa yimithetho kaYehova.—Hezekile 18:2, 14, 17.
16. Kutheni kubalulekile ukulungiselela intsapho yakho, yaye oku kuquka ntoni?
16 UYehova ulindele ukuba abazali abangamaKristu banike abantwana babo ukhokelo nenyameko efanelekileyo. UPawulos wabhala: “Ukuba ke umntu akabakhathalele abakhe, ngokukodwa abendlu yakhe, ulukhanyele ukholo, unobubi ngaphezu kongakholwayo.” (1 Timoti 5:8) Anjani ukuba qatha wona amazwi! Ukufeza indima yakho njengomlungiseleli, nto leyo equka ukunyamekela iintswelo zokwenyama, zokomoya nezeemvakalelo zabantwana bakho, lilungelo nembopheleleko yomntu ohlonela uThixo. IBhayibhile inikela imigaqo enokunceda abazali bakhele abantwana babo imeko-bume eyonwabisayo. Qwalasela eminye yale.
17. Yintoni efunekayo ukuba abantwana bakho baza kuba nomthetho kaThixo ezintliziyweni zabo?
17 Miselani umzekelo omhle. Abazali abangamaSirayeli bayalelwa kwathiwa: “Uze uwatsolise [amazwi kaThixo] koonyana bakho, uthethe ngawo ekuhlaleni kwakho endlwini yakho, nasekuhambeni kwakho ngendlela, nasekulaleni kwakho, nasekuvukeni kwakho.” Abazali babefanele bafundise abantwana babo imilinganiselo kaThixo. Kodwa esi sibongozo sandulelwa ngala mazwi: “La mazwi ndikuwisela umthetho ngawo namhlanje, aze abe sentliziyweni yakho.” (Duteronomi 6:6, 7, akekeliswe sithi.) Ewe, abazali abanako ukunikela ngoko bangenako. Imithetho kaThixo ifanele ikrolwe kwezenu iintliziyo kuqala ukuba nifuna ibhalwe ezintliziyweni zabantwana benu.—IMizekeliso 20:7; thelekisa uLuka 6:40.
18. Ekubonakaliseni uthando, uYehova wabamisela umzekelo obalaseleyo njani abazali?
18 Baqinisekiseni ngothando lwenu. Ekubhaptizweni kukaYesu, uYehova wathi: “Wena unguNyana wam oyintanda, endikholisiweyo nguwe.” (Luka 3:22) Ngaloo ndlela uYehova wamvuma ukuba unguNyana wakhe, wakuvakalisa ekuhleni ukukholiswa kwakhe nguye waza wamqinisekisa ngothando Lwakhe. Kamva uYesu wathi kuYise: “Wandithanda kwaphambi kokusekwa kwehlabathi.” (Yohane 17:24) Ngoko ke, njengabazali abahlonela uThixo, baxeleleni nize nibabonise abantwana benu ukuba niyabathanda—yaye kwenzeni ngokufuthi oku. Ngalo lonke ixesha khumbulani ukuba “uthando luyakha.”—1 Korinte 8:1.
19, 20. Yintoni ebandakanyekileyo ekuqeqesheni abantwana ngokufanelekileyo, yaye abazali banokungenelwa njani kumzekelo kaYehova?
19 Uqeqesho. IBhayibhile ibethelela imbaluleka yoqeqesho lothando. (IMizekeliso 1:8) Abazali abayiphephayo imbopheleleko yabo yokukhokela abantwana babo namhlanje phantse ngokuqinisekileyo baya kujamelana nemiphumo ebuhlungu ngomso. Ukanti, abazali bakwalunyukiswa ngokugqithisa. UPawulos wabhala: “Nina boyise, musani ukubacaphukisa abantwana benu, ukuze bangafi iintliziyo.” (Kolose 3:21) Abazali bamele bakuphephe ukubalungisa ngokugqithiseleyo abantwana babo okanye ukusoloko belilisela ngeentsilelo zabo okanye begxeka imigudu yabo.
20 UYehova uThixo, uBawo wethu wasezulwini, umisela umzekelo ekunikeleni uqeqesho. Akaze agqithise xa elungisa. UThixo wabaxelela oku abantu bakhe: “Kuya kufuneka ndikohlwaye ngomlinganiselo ofanelekileyo.” (Yeremiya 46:28, NW) Abazali bafanele baxelise uYehova kule nkalo. Uqeqesho olugqithayo kwimida esengqiqweni okanye olugqithayo kwinjongo yalo yokulungisa nokufundisa luyacaphukisa ngokuqinisekileyo.
21. Abazali banokuqonda njani enoba uqeqesho lwabo luyaphumelela kusini na?
21 Abazali banokuqiniseka njani enoba uqeqesho lwabo luyaphumelela? Basenokuzibuza ukuba, ‘Lufeza ntoni uqeqesho lwam?’ Lufanele lufundise. Umntwana wakho ufanele asiqonde isizathu sokuba aqeqeshwe. Abazali bakwafanele bayixhalabele imiphumo yokulungisa kwabo. Liyinyaniso elokuba phantse bonke abantwana ekuqaleni baya kucatshukiswa luqeqesho. (Hebhere 12:11) Kodwa uqeqesho alufanele luze lumenze umntwana azive esoyika okanye elahliwe okanye lumshiye enemvakalelo yokuba ungendawo. Ngaphambi kokulungisa abantu bakhe, uYehova wathi: “Musa ukoyika, . . . ngokuba ndinawe.” (Yeremiya 46:28) Ewe, ukulungisa kufanele kwenziwe ngendlela yokuba umntwana wakho aqonde ukuba unaye njengomzali onothando nonenkxaso.
UKUZUZA “AMACEBO OBULUMKO”
22, 23. Unokulufumana njani ulwalathiso oluyimfuneko ekwakheni intsapho eyonwabileyo?
22 Sinokuba nombulelo kuba uYehova elungiselele izixhobo esizifunayo ukuze sakhe intsapho eyonwabileyo. Kodwa ukuba nezixhobo nje kuphela akwanele. Sifanele siqhelisele ukuzisebenzisa ngokufanelekileyo. Ngokomzekelo, umakhi usenokuba nemikhwa emibi kwindlela azisebenzisa ngayo izixhobo zakhe. Ezinye zazo usenokuzisebenzisa ngendlela ephosakeleyo ngokupheleleyo. Ngaphantsi kwezi meko, iindlela zakhe zisenokuphumela kumsebenzi okumgangatho ophantsi. Ngokufanayo, usenokuba ngoku uyaqonda ukuba kukho imikhwa engalunganga esele ingenile kwintsapho yakho. Eminye isenokuba yendele yaye kunzima ukuyiguqula. Noko ke, landela icebiso leBhayibhile: “Ukuze eve osisilumko, aqokele afunde, oqondayo azuze amacebo obulumko.”—IMizekeliso 1:5.
23 Unokufumana ukhokelo lobulumko ngokuqhubeka ungenisa ulwazi ngoThixo. Yiphaphele imigaqo yeBhayibhile esebenzayo kubomi bentsapho uze wenze uhlengahlengiso apho lufuneka khona. Bukela amaKristu aqolileyo amisela umzekelo omhle njengamaqabane omtshato nabazali. Thetha nawo. Ngaphezu kwako konke, chazela uYehova oko kukuxhalabisayo ngomthandazo. (INdumiso 55:22; Filipi 4:6, 7) Angakunceda unandiphe ubomi bentsapho obonwabisayo nobunikela imbeko kuye.
[Imibhalo esemazantsi]
a Ekuphela kwesizathu esinikelwa ziZibhalo soqhawulo-mtshato aze ubani avumeleke ukuphinda atshate “luhenyuzo”—iintlobano zesini ngaphandle komtshato.—Mateyu 19:9.
HLOLA ULWAZI LWAKHO
Ukunyaniseka, unxibelelwano, imbeko nentlonelo ziba negalelo njani kumtshato owonwabisayo?
Ziziphi iindlela abazali abanokubaqinisekisa ngazo abantwana babo ngothando lwabo?
Ngabaphi oothunywashe ababandakanyekileyo kuqeqesho olufanelekileyo?
[Umfanekiso ozalise iphepha, kwiphepha 147]