Mungatani Ngati Muli ndi Chisoni Chifukwa cha Imfa ya Bambo Kapena Mayi Anu?

VUTO LIMENE LIMAKHALAPO

Pa nthawi imene Dami anali ndi zaka 6, bambo ake anamwalira ndi matenda otupa mitsempha. Derrick ali ndi zaka 9, bambo ake anamwalira ndi matenda a mtima. Ndipo Jeannie ali ndi zaka 7, mayi ake anamwalira atadwala khansa ya m’chiberekero kwa chaka chathunthu.a

Makolo a achinyamata atatuwa anamwalira anawo adakali aang’ono kwambiri. Kodi n’zimene inunso zinakuchitikirani? Ngati ndi choncho, nkhaniyi ingakuthandizeni kuti muthe kupirira.b Choyamba, tiyeni tione zimene zimachitika munthu akakhala ndi chisoni.

ZIMENE MUYENERA KUDZIWA

Timakhudzidwa mosiyana. Anthufe sitifanana mmene timasonyezera chisoni. Buku lina linanena kuti: “Palibe malamulo kapena njira inayake yosonyezera chisoni.” (Helping Teens Cope With Death) Chofunika n’choti munthu asamabise chisoni chimene ali nacho. Tikutero chifukwa chakuti . . .

Kubisa chisoni n’koopsa. Jeannie amene tamutchula koyambirira, ananena kuti: “Sindinkafuna kuti mng’ono wanga adziwe kuti nzeru zandithera. Choncho ndinayamba kubisa mmene ndikumvera. Ndipo mpaka pano, ngakhale ndimadziwa kuti si zabwino, sindimafuna kuti ena adziwe mmene zinthu zikundipwetekera.”

Akatswiri ena analemba kuti: “Munthu amene sasonyeza mmene akumvera mumtima, pakapita nthawi amadzavutika ndi chisoni chimene chimadzabwera mwadzidzidzi ndipo nthawi zina akhoza kudwala.” Nthawi zina munthu amene amabisa chisoni chake amadzayamba kumwa mowa mwauchidakwa kapena kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo kuti asamavutike ndi maganizo.​—The Grieving Teen.

Chisoni chingapangitse munthu kusokonezeka maganizo. Mwachitsanzo, anthu ena amakwiyira munthu amene anamwalirayo chifukwa amamva ngati anawathawa. Enanso amaimba Mulungu mlandu chifukwa amaganiza kuti akanatha kuchita zinazake kuti munthuyo asafe. Anthu ambiri amadziimba mlandu chifukwa cha zomwe analankhula kapena kuchitira womwalirayo ndipo amaona kuti alibenso mwayi wokonza zomwe analakwitsazo.

N’zoona kuti sitingafotokoze mmene aliyense amamvera akakhala ndi chisoni. Koma kodi n’chiyani chingakuthandizeni zoterezi zikakuchitikirani?

ZIMENE MUNGACHITE

Muziuzako munthu wina. Nthawi imene muli ndi chisoni mungaganize kuti mwina ndi bwino kukhala panokha. Koma mukauzako wachibale kapena mnzanu, zingakuthandizeni kuti mtima wanu ukhaleko m’malo komanso kuti musasokonezeke kwambiri.​—Lemba lothandiza: Miyambo 18:24.

Muzikhala ndi buku lolembamo. Mutha kulemba zinthu zokhudza bambo kapena mayi anu omwe anamwalira. Mwachitsanzo, mutha kulemba zinthu zosangalatsa zokhudza womwalirayo zimene mukukumbukira. Muthanso kulemba makhalidwe ake omwe ankakusangalatsani. Kodi anali ndi makhalidwe ati omwe inuyo mungakonde kutengera?

Ngati mumadziimba mlandu mukakumbukira kuti nthawi ina munalankhula molakwika kwa bambo kapena mayi anu, mungalembe mmene zikukukhudzirani mumtima komanso chifukwa chake. Mwina mungalembe kuti: “Ndikumva chisoni kuti tsiku limene bambo amamwalira, ndinali nditakangana nawo chadzulo lake.”

Kenako, pezani njira yothetsera zifukwa zimene mukudziimbira mlandu. Buku lina linanena kuti: “Musamadziimbe mlandu chifukwa chakuti pa nthawiyo simunkadziwa kuti bambo kapena mayi anu amwalira ndipo simudzathanso kuwapepesa.” Bukuli linanenanso kuti: “N’zosamveka kuti munthu asalankhule kapena kuchita zinazake poopa kuti nthawi ina angadzafunike kupepesa.” (The Grieving Teen)​—Lemba lothandiza: Yobu 10:1.

Muzidzisamalira. Muzipuma mokwanira, kuchita masewero olimbitsa thupi komanso kudya zakudya zopatsa thanzi. Ngati mukumva kuti simukufuna kudya, mungadye tizakudya tina topatsa thanzi mpaka pamene mungafune kudya chakudya chenicheni. Kudya zakudya zomwe anthu amangozikonda chifukwa choti n’zokoma koma zili zosapatsa thanzi komanso kumwa mowa, sikungachepetse chisoni chanu. M’malomwake zimangowonjezera vutolo.

Muzipemphera. Baibulo limati: “Umutulire Yehova nkhawa zako, ndipo iye adzakuchirikiza.” (Salimo 55:22) Pemphero si chinthu chongokuthandizani kuti mupezeko bwino koma mumakhala mukulankhula ndi Mulungu amene “amatitonthoza m’masautso athu onse.”​—2 Akorinto 1:3, 4.

Mulungu amatitonthozanso pogwiritsira ntchito Mawu ake Baibulo. Fufuzani m’Baibulo kuti mudziwe zomwe limaphunzitsa pa nkhani yokhudza zimene zimachitika munthu akamwalira komanso pa nkhani ya kuuka kwa akufa.c​—Lemba lothandiza: Salimo 94:19.