Mazano Okuti Mhuri Ifare
Kugadzirisa Zvinetso
Murume anoti: “Ko vana vaendepi?”
Mudzimai anoti: “Vaenda kumashopu kunotenga mbatya itsva.”
Murume anoti: [Agumbuka uye nenzwi riri pamusoro] “Wati chii? Kunotenga mbatya itsva? Inga wani vakatenga mbatya itsva mwedzi wapera!”
Mudzimai anoti: [Achiramba mhosva uye arwadziwa nezvaari kupomerwa] “Kwanga kuine sero. Uyezve vatanga vandikumbira uye ndavati vaende zvavo.”
Murume anoti: [Ashatirwa uye achipopota] “Unozviziva kuti handidi kuti vana vedu vangoshandisa mari ndisingazvizivi! Wanga uchimbomhanyireiko kusarudza usina kutaura neni?”
UNOFUNGA kuti vaviri vane mashoko ari pamusoro apa vanoda kugadzirisa zvinetso zvipi? Zviri pachena kuti murume wacho haagoni kudzora hasha dzake. Uyezve, vaviri ava vanenge vasinganyatsobvumirani nezvorusununguko rwavanopa vana vavo. Zvinoitawo sokuti havanyatsokurukurirani zvakanaka.
Chakafukidza dzimba matenga. Vakaroorana vose vachava nezvimwe zvinetso. Kunyange zvinetso zvacho zvingava zvikuru kana zviduku, zvinokosha kuti murume nomudzimai vadzidze kuzvigadzirisa. Nei?
Nokufamba kwenguva, zvinetso zvisingagadziriswi zvingazoita somudhuri murefu unovhiringidza kukurukurirana. Mambo Soromoni akati: “Kune kukakavara kwakaita somuzariro weshongwe yokugara.” (Zvirevo 18:19) Ungaita sei kuti munyatsokurukurirana zvinobudirira pakugadzirisa zvinetso?
Sezvo mwoyo nemapapu zvichidiwa kuti ropa ritenderere mumuviri, kudanana nokuremekedzana zvinodiwawo kuti kukurukurirana kubatsire mumhuri. (VaEfeso 5:33) Kana totaura nezvokugadzirisa zvinetso, rudo ruchaita kuti vakaroorana vatarise nyaya iripo pane kuti vafunge zvavakambokanganisirana uye kuti zvakaguma zvarwadzisa sei vamwe. (1 VaKorinde 13:4, 5; 1 Petro 4:8) Vakaroorana vanoremekedzana vachataurirana vakasununguka voedza kunzwa zviri kurehwa, kwete zviri kutaurwa chete.
Matanho Mana Okugadzirisa Zvinetso
Chimbofunga nezvematanho mana akanyorwa pasi apa, uye ona kuti zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri zvingakubatsira sei kugadzirisa zvinetso murudo noruremekedzo.
1. Ronga nguva yokukurukura nyaya yacho.
“Chinhu chimwe nechimwe chine nguva yakatarwa, . . . nguva yokunyarara nenguva yokutaura.” (Muparidzi 3:1, 7) Sezvaratidzwa mubopoto riri pamusoro apa, zvimwe zvinetso zvinogona kumutsa hasha. Kana zvikadaro, zvidzore wombomisa nyaya yacho kwekanguva, ‘kumbonyarara’ kupopota kusati kwatanga. Ungaita kuti murambe muchiwirirana kana ukateerera zano reBhaibheri rokuti: “Kutanga kwokukakavara kwakaita somunhu anovhurira mvura; saka ibva kupopotedzana kusati kwatanga.”—Zvirevo 17:14.
Zvisinei, panewo “nguva yokutaura.” Kana zvinetso zvikasagadziriswa zvinokura sezvinoita sora risingasakurwi. Saka usarera chinetso chacho, uchifunga kuti chichangopera choga. Kana ukati nyaya yacho imboregwa kwekanguva, remekedza mumwe wako nokusarudza imwe nguva isiri kure yamunogona kuzotaura nezvechinetso chacho. Vimbiso yakadaro ingakubatsirai mose kushandisa pfungwa iri muBhaibheri yokuti: “Zuva ngarirege kuvira makatsamwa.” (VaEfeso 4:26) Saka unofanira kuzoita zvaunenge wavimbisa.
EDZA IZVI: Sarudza nguva vhiki nevhiki yamunogona kukurukura zvinetso zvemhuri. Kana ukaona kuti pane nguva yamunonyanya kuda kuita nharo—somuenzaniso, paunenge uchangobva kubasa kana kuti musati madya—usabvuma kukurukura zvinetso panguva iyoyo. Asi sarudza nguva yamunenge makafaranuka.
2. Taura zviri pamwoyo uye noruremekedzo.
“Mumwe nomumwe wenyu ngaataure chokwadi nomuvakidzani wake.” (VaEfeso 4:25) Kana wakaroora kana kuroorwa, wawakaroorana naye ndiye muvakidzani wako wepedyo. Saka paunenge uchitaura newawakaroorana naye iva akatendeseka uye muudze zviri kutsi kwomwoyo. Margareta,a ave akaroorwa kwemakore 26, anoti: “Ndichangobva kuroorwa, ndaitarisira kuti murume wangu aizongoziva manzwiro andaiita kana pakamuka chinetso. Ndakazoona kuti tarisiro dzakadaro hadzina musoro. Iye zvino ndinoedza kutaura zvandinofunga uye manzwiro angu zvakajeka.”
Yeuka kuti chinangwa chako pamunenge muchikurukura chinetso hachisi chokukunda muvengi kana kuti kuhwina, asi unenge uchingoda kuti mumwe wako azive zvaunofunga. Kuti ubudirire kuita izvi, taura zvauri kufunga kuti ndizvo zviri kunetsa, wozotaura kuti zvakatanga rini, uye wotsanangura kuti zvinoita kuti unzwe sei. Somuenzaniso, kana uchigumburwa nouyanga hwomumwe wako, unogona kutaura noruremekedzo kuti, ‘Paunobva kubasa wosiya mbatya dzako dziri pasi [chinetso chacho uye pachinoitika] ndinonzwa sokuti hauna kumboona kugadzira kwandaita mumba [zvinotsanangura manzwiro auri kuita chaiwo].’ Zvadaro taura nokungwarira zvaunofunga kuti zvingapedza chinetso chacho.
EDZA IZVI: Kuti zvauri kufunga zvikujekere usati wataura nomumwe wako, nyora pasi zvaunofunga kuti ndizvo zviri kunetsa uye kuti ungada kuti zvigadziriswe sei.
3. Teerera uye nzwisisa manzwiro omumwe wako.
Mudzidzi Jakobho akanyora kuti vaKristu vanofanira ‘kukurumidza kunzwa, kunonoka kutaura, kunonoka kuva nehasha.’ (Jakobho 1:19) Zvinhu zvishoma zvinokonzera kusuruvara kukuru pavanhu vakaroorana kupfuura kufunga kuti mumwe wacho haanzwisisi manzwiro omumwe wake nezvechimwe chinetso. Saka usaita kuti mumwe wako ave nemaonero akadaro!—Mateu 7:12.
Wolfgang, ave akaroora kwemakore 35 anoti, “Patinokurukura zvinetso, ndinoshushikana, kunyanya pandinoona sokuti mudzimai wangu haasiri kunzwisisa mafungiro angu.” Dianna, ave akaroorwa kwemakore 20, anobvuma kuti, “Ndinowanzonyunyutira murume wangu kuti haanyatsonditeereri patinokurukura zvinetso.” Ungakurira sei dambudziko iri?
Usafungira kuti unoziva zviri kufungwa nomumwe wako kana manzwiro ake. Shoko raMwari rinoti: “Munhu anokonzera kukakavara nokuda kwokuzvikudza, asi vaya vanorangana vane uchenjeri.” (Zvirevo 13:10) Remekedza mumwe wako nokumubvumira kutaura zvaanofunga usingamudimburiri. Zvadaro kuti uone kuti wanzwisisa zvataurwa, dzokorora manzwisisiro awazviita uchimuudza zvaataura, wozvitaura zvisina ukasha kana kutsvinya. Bvumira mumwe wako kukururamisa kana usina kunzwisisa zvimwe zvataurwa. Usaramba uriwe unongotaura. Pananai mukana wokutaura kusvikira mave kubvumirana muchiratidza kuti muri kunzwisisana zvamunofunga nezvamunonzwa nezvenyaya yacho.
Chokwadi zvinoda kuzvininipisa uye kushivirira kuti unyatsoteerera mumwe wako uye kuziva zvaari kufunga. Asi kana uchitanga iwe kuremekedza mumwe wako, iye achanzwawo achida kukuremekedza.—Mateu 7:2; VaRoma 12:10.
EDZA IZVI: Paunodzokorora zvinenge zvataurwa nomumwe wako, usangodzokorora mashoko acho uchimhanya. Uchiratidza mutsa, edza kutsanangura zvawanzwisisa pane zvaataura uye manzwiro ake.—1 Petro 3:8.
4. Bvumiranai magadzirisiro amunoda.
“Vaviri vari nani kupfuura mumwe chete, nokuti vane mubayiro wakanaka pabasa ravo rakaoma. Nokuti kana mumwe wavo akawa, mumwe wacho anogona kusimudza mumwe wake.” (Muparidzi 4:9, 10) Kana murume nomudzimai va- kasashanda pamwe chete uye vakasatsigirana, havana zvinetso zvakawanda zvavangagadzirisa.
Chokwadi, Jehovha akagadza murume kuti ave musoro wemhuri. (1 VaKorinde 11:3; VaEfeso 5:23) Asi kuva musoro hakurevi kudzvinyirira. Murume akachenjera haazosarudzi chi- nhu asina kumbobvunza mudzimai wake. David, ave akaroora kwemakore 20 anoti, “Ndinoedza kutsvaka chandinobvumirana nomudzimai wangu ndoedza kuwana zvatinokwanisa kutsigira kana tasarudza.” Tanya, ave akaroorwa kwemakore manomwe, anoti: “Haisi nyaya yokuti ane mhosva ndiani. Dzimwe nguva pangava nepfungwa dzakasiyana dzokugadzirisa nadzo chinetso. Ndakanzwisisa kuti chinoita kuti mubudirire kunzwisisa kwete kuita chandagwinyira.”
EDZA IZVI: Ita zvinoita kuti mumwe wako ade kushanda newe nokunyora pamwe chete nzira dzakawanda dzamunofunga kuti dzingagadzirisa chinetso. Kana mapedza kunyora zvose zvamunofunga, tarisaizve pane zvamanyora uye shandisai zano ramunobvumirana. Zvadaro sarudzai imwe nguva yamuchazoongorora kuti makaita here zvamakasarudza uye kuti zvakabudirira sei.
Vakanai, Kwete Kuputsana
Jesu akafananidza kuroorana nejoko. (Mateu 19:6) Panguva yaakararama, joko raiva danda raibatanidza mhuka mbiri kuti dziite basa pamwe chete. Kudai mhuka dzacho dzaizotadza kushanda pamwe chete, hapana zvadzaizokwanisa kuita uye dzaigona kukuzvurwa muhuro nejoko. Padzaishanda pamwe chete, dzaigona kudhonza zvinhu zvinorema kana kurima munda.
Saizvozvowo, murume nomudzimai vanotadza kushanda pamwe chete vanogona kukuzvurwa nemba yavo. Asi, kana vakadzidza kushanda pamwe chete, vanogona kugadzirisa chero chinetso chipi zvacho uye kuita zvakawanda zvakanaka. Mumwe murume anonzi Kalala ari kufara mumhuri make anotaura nyaya yacho muchidimbu achiti: “Kwemakore 25 ini nomudzimai wangu tave tichigadzirisa zvinetso zvedu nokutaura takasununguka uye nokuvimbika, kutsvaka manzwiro uye mafungiro omumwe, kunyengeterera kubatsirwa naJehovha uye kuita zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri.” Unogona kuzviitawo here?
ZVIBVUNZE KUTI . . .
Chinetso chipi chandiri kunyanya kuda kukurukura nomumwe wangu?
Ndingava sei nechokwadi chokuti ndanyatsonzwisisa manzwiro omumwe wangu chaiwo nezvenyaya iyi?
Kana ndichiwanzova chandagwinyira, zvinetso zvipi zvandinenge ndichimutsa?
a Mamwe mazita akachinjwa.