Kukurukura Nevana Vari Kuyaruka

KANA uri kurera mwana ari kuyaruka, ungangonzwawo sezvinoita vabereki vane mashoko ari pamusoro apa. Kare, waimbokurukura nomwana wako pasina chainetsa. Iye zvino, zvinoita sokuti pava nezvinokanganisa kukurukurirana kwacho. “Paaiva muduku, mwanakomana wangu aindimwaya nemibvunzo,” vanodaro vamwe amai vokuItaly vanonzi Angela. “Iye zvino ndini ndinotofanira kumutanga kuti tikurukure. Kana ndikasadaro, pangatopfuura mazuva tisina kukurukura zvine musoro.”

Kufanana naAngela, zvichida wakawana kuti mwana wako aimbotaura chaizvo achinja kuva munhu akafundumwara. Zvose zvaungaedza kuita kuti ukurukure naye zvingashaya basa paanongokupindura neshoko rimwe chete achiratidza kuti haadi zvokutaura. Ungabvunza mwanakomana wako kuti, “Waswera sei?” Iye obva akupindura kuti, “Ndaswera.” Ungabvunzawo mwanasikana wako kuti, “Kuchikoro kwanga kuri sei?” Iye oti, “Hameno.” Kumumanikidza kuti ataure zvakawanda nokumubvunza kuti “nei usiri kuda kutaura?” kungatoita kuti aite sechimumumu.

Ichokwadi kuti vamwe vari kuyaruka havana dambudziko iri. Asi zvavanotaura hazvisi izvo zvinoda kunzwiwa nevabereki vavo. Vamwe amai vokuNigeria vanonzi Edna vanoyeuka izvi, “Mwanasikana wangu aiwanzondipindura achiti ‘siyanai neni’ pandaimukumbira kuita chimwe chinhu.” Ramón, wokuMexico anotaura zvakada kufanana nezvemwanakomana wake ane makore 16. Anoti, “Tinokakavadzana anenge mazuva ose. Pose pandinomukumbira kuti aite chimwe chinhu, anotanga kuti pamunhondo pamusasa, kuti asaite zvandinenge ndamukumbira.”

Kuedza kukurukura nomwana ari kuyaruka asingadi zvokutaura kunogona kuita kuti mubereki atadze kushivirira. Bhaibheri rinoti kana “pasina kurangana, zvirongwa hazvibudiriri.” (Zvirevo 15:22) Anna, mubereki anorera vana ari oga wokuRussia, anobvuma kuti, “Pandinenge ndisingazivi kuti mwanakomana wangu ari kufungei, ndinotsamwa zvokuti ndinenge ndichida kupopota.” Nei zvichiita sokuti kukurukurirana kana kwava kukosha, vana vari kuyaruka nevabereki vavo vanoita sokuti havachakwanisi kukurukurirana zvakanaka?

Kuziva Zvinokanganisa Kukurukurirana Kwakanaka

Kukurukurirana kunopfuura kungotaurawo zvako. Jesu akati “muromo [womunhu] unotaura zvinobva pazvizhinji zviri mumwoyo.” (Ruka 6:45) Saka kukurukurirana kwakanaka kunoita kuti tidzidze kune vamwe uye tiratidzewo zvatiri. Vari kuyaruka vanoomerwa nokutaura zviri mupfungwa dzavo uye zviri mumwoyo yavo, nokuti kunyange mwana aimbotaura chaizvo angaerekana anyarara uye ava kunyara. Kazhinji vana vari kuyaruka vanoona sokuti vanhu vose vari kuongorora zvavanoita uye zvavanotaura, sezvinonzi vari pachikuva uye vanhu vose vakavatarira. Pane kuti vave noushingi, vaya vanonyara vanovanda vorarama upenyu husinganyatsozivikanwi nevabereki vavo.

Chimwe chinogona kukanganisa kukurukurirana, kuda kuzvimiririra kunoita vana vari kuyaruka. Izvi hazvidzivisiki, mwana wako ari kukura uye zvinosanganisira kuparadzana nemhuri. Hazvirevi hazvo kuti mwana wako ava kukwanisa kugara oga. Muzvinhu zvakawanda, iyi ndiyo nguva yaunofanira kunyanya kumutsigira. Asi pfungwa yokuzvimiririra inotanga asati ava munhu mukuru. Sezvo zvichiitika pakukura, vana vari kuyaruka vangada kufunga zvinhu vari voga vasati vataura nevamwe.

Vamwe amai vokuMexico vanonzi Jessica vakacherechedza kuti, vana vanenge vachiyaruka vanganzwa vakasununguka chaizvo pavanenge vaine vamwe vavo. Vanoti, “Mwanasikana wangu paaiva muduku, aigara achindiudza zvinetso zvake. Iye zvino ava kuenda kunoudza shamwari dzake.” Kana mwana wako ava kudaro, usagumisa kuti “akuramba” kuti hausisiri mubereki wake. Kusiyana neizvi, tsvakurudzo dzinoratidza kuti kunyange vari kuyaruka vakaita sevaramba vabereki, vanenge vachikoshesa mazano avanopiwa nevabereki vavo kupfuura eshamwari dzavo. Zvisinei, ungava sei nechokwadi chokuti munogona kuramba muchikurukurirana?

Zvinoita Kuti Mubudirire, Kukunda Zvipingamupinyi

Chimbofungidzira kuti uri kutyaira motokari mumugwagwa mukuru wakatwasuka, wakareba. Kwemakiromita akawanda wanga uchityaira usingakoni. Asi, mugwagwa unongoerekana waita kona. Kuti motokari yako irambe iri mumugwagwa, unotofanira kukona. Ndizvo zvazvinoitawo kana mwana wako ava kuyaruka. Kwemakore akawanda waibudirira pawaikurukura nomwana wako zvichida pasina zvakawanda zvainetsa. Zvisinei, iye zvino mwana wako angoerekana achinja uye unofanira kuchinjawo kukurukura kwaunoita naye sokukona kunoita mutyairi uya. Zvibvunze mibvunzo inotevera.

‘Kana mwanakomana wangu kana mwanasikana wangu ava kuda kutaura, ndinenge ndakagadzirira here kuti ndikurukure naye?’ Bhaibheri rinoti: “Shoko rinotaurwa panguva yaro yakakodzera rakafanana nemaapuro endarama ari mundiro dzakavezwa dzesirivha.” (Zvirevo 25:11) Sezvinojekeswa norugwaro urwu, zvinokosha kuziva nguva yakakodzera. Somuenzaniso: Murimi haakurumidzisi kana kuti haanonoki kukohwa. Anofanira kuita zvaanokwanisa kana goho rake raibva. Mwana wako angava nenguva yaanenge achida kutaura. Shandisa mukana iwoyo. Frances, amai vanorera vana vari voga vokuAustralia, vanoti, “Kazhinji, mwanasikana wangu anouya usiku kuzotandara neni kweawa muimba yangu yokurara. Ndiri munhu anoda kukurumidza kurara kana huri usiku, saka zvakanga zvisiri nyore, asi nguva idzodzo taitaura zvose.”

‘Ndinonzwisisa here zvaari kureva kubvawo pamanzwiro ake kwete kubva pamashoko ake chete?’ Jobho 12:11 inoti: “Nzeve haiedzi mashoko sokuravira kunoita rurimi zvokudya here?” Kupfuura zvawaimboita, iye zvino unofanira ‘kuedza’ zvinenge zvichitaurwa nomwana wako. Kazhinji vana vari kuyaruka vanotaura pamusoro pezvinhu sokunge kuti ndizvo zvazvagara zviri. Somuenzaniso, mwana wako angati, “Munogara muchindibata somucheche!” kana kuti “Hapana pamunombonditeerera!” Pane kuda kumururamisa mashoko okuti “munogara” uye “hapana,” ziva kuti mwana wako handizvo zvaanenge achireva. Somuenzaniso, paanoti, “Munogara muchindibata somucheche!” zvimwe anenge achireva kuti, “Ndinoona sokuti hamuvimbi neni,” uye paanoti, “Hapana pamunombonditeerera!” zvimwe anenge achireva kuti, “Ndinoda kukuudzai manzwiro chaiwo andinoita.” Edza kunzwisisa zvaanenge achireva kubva pamanzwiro ake kwete kubva pamashoko ake chete.

‘Ndinomanikidza mwana wangu kuti ataure here, ndisingazivi kuti zvinovhiringidza kukurukurirana kwandinoita naye?’

Bhaibheri rinoti: “Mbeu yechibereko chokururama inodyarwa murugare nokuda kwevaya vanoita kuti pave norugare.” (Jakobho 3:18) Nezvaunotaura uye zvaunoita, ita kuti pave no“rugare” kuitira kuti mwana wako ari kuyaruka ade kutaura. Yeuka kuti ndiwe uri kutsigira mwana wako. Saka, kana mune nyaya yamunenge muchikurukura, usataura naye sezvinoita gweta riri mudare riri kuda kuti mhosva ibude. Vamwe baba vokuKorea vanonzi Ahn vanoti, “Mubereki akachenjera haatauri mashoko okuti, ‘Uchakura rini iwe?’ kana okuti, ‘Kangani ndichikuudza?’ Ini ndaimbozviitawo, asi ndakaona kuti ndaikanganisa nokuti ndakacherechedza kuti vanakomana vangu vaitsamwiswa kwete chete nematauriro andaiita asiwo nezvandaitaura.”

Hazvina kuoma kukurukura nevari kuyaruka. Chinja nzira dzako dzokukurukura maererano nezera remwana wako. Taura nevamwe vabereki vakabudirira pane izvi. (Zvirevo 11:14) Kana uchikurukura nomwana wako, ‘kurumidza kunzwa, unonoke kutaura uye unonoke kuva nehasha.’ (Jakobho 1:19) Kupfuura zvose, usakanda mapfumo pasi paunorera mwana wako ari kuyaruka uchimu“ranga nokutungamirira pfungwa kunoitwa naJehovha.”—VaEfeso 6:4..