Teuʻi Hoʻo Taʻahiné ki Heʻene Hoko ʻo Fuʻu Fefiné

Ko e hoko ko ha tokotaha lahí ko ha taimi ia ʻo e ngaahi liliu lahi. Ko e meʻa ʻoku hoko ki he tamaiki fefiné lolotonga ʻa e ngaahi liliu ko ení ko e puke fakamāhiná.

KO E kamata ʻa e puke fakamāhiná ʻe lava ke hoko ko ha taimi fakahohaʻa ia ki he tamaiki fefiné, pea ʻoku nau faʻa hokosia ʻi he meʻá ni ha ngaahi ongoʻi kehekehe. ʻOku lava ke fakatupu puputuʻu ia ʻo hangē pē ko e ngaahi liliu kehe ʻoku fekauʻaki mo e hoko ko ha tokotaha lahí. ʻOku hokosia ʻe he tamaiki fefine tokolahi ʻa e ilifia mo e loto-moʻua ʻi he felāveʻi mo ʻenau ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná, meimei ko e tupu ia mei he fakamatala hala ʻoku nau maʻú, pe ʻi he taimi lahi, ko e ʻikai ha fakamatala.

Ko e tamaiki fefine ʻoku nau mateuteu ki heʻenau ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná ʻoku faʻa siʻi ange ʻa ʻenau puputuʻu ʻi he taimi ko iá. Kae kehe, ʻoku fakahaaʻi ʻi he ngaahi fakatotoló ʻoku ʻikai ke mateuteu ki ai ʻa e tamaiki fefine tokolahi. ʻI he savea ʻe taha naʻe kau ki ai ʻa e faʻahinga mei he fonua ʻe 23, ko e meimei vahe tolu ʻe taha ʻo e faʻahingá ni naʻa nau fakamatala kuo teʻeki ai ke fai ha talanoa mo kinautolu ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná ki muʻa ʻi heʻene hokó. Koeʻuhi ko e ʻikai te nau mateuteu ki aí, naʻe ʻikai ke ʻiloʻi ʻe he tamaiki fefiné ni ʻa e meʻa ke faí ʻi he taimi naʻe hoko mai aí.

Ko e niʻihi ʻo e kakai fefine kuo nau fakamatalaʻi ʻa e ngaahi hokosia kovi tahá ko e faʻahinga ia naʻe ʻikai haʻanau ʻilo ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná. ʻI ha fakatotolo ʻe taha, naʻe ngāueʻaki ai ʻe he kakai fefiné ʻi hono fakamatalaʻi ʻenau puke fakamāhiná ʻa e ngaahi foʻi lea hangē ko e “manavasiʻi,” “loto-mafasia,” “mā” mo e “ilifia” ke fakamatalaʻiʻaki ʻa e meʻa naʻa nau hokosiá.

Ko e ʻasi ʻa e totó ʻoku ilifia lahi ai ʻa e kakaí, koeʻuhi ko e haʻu ki tuʻa ʻa e totó ʻoku faʻa fekauʻaki ia mo e langa pe ko e lavea. Ko ia ai, ʻoku ʻikai faingataʻa ke mahinoʻi ʻi he taimi ʻoku ʻikai ai ha fakamatala totonu pe mateuteu ki ai ki muʻá, ʻoku lava ke fakatupunga ha taha ʻe he ngaahi sīpinga fakakaukau fakafonuá, ngaahi fanangá, pe naʻa mo e taʻeʻiló pē ke ne fakafehokotaki hala ʻa e puke fakamāhiná ki ha mahaki pe lavea pe vakai ki ai ko ha meʻa ia ke mā ai.

ʻOku fiemaʻu ke ʻiloʻi ʻe hoʻo taʻahiné ko e haʻu ʻa e totó ʻi he puke fakamāhiná ko ha meʻa fakanatula ia ʻoku hoko ki he tamaiki fefine moʻui lelei kotoa pē. ʻI he tuʻunga ko ha mātuʻá, ʻe lava ke ke tokoni ke fakanonga ia mei ha ngaahi ongoʻi loto-moʻua pe ilifia pē. Anga-fēfē?

Mahuʻinga ʻa e Ngafa ʻo e Ongo Mātuʻá

ʻOku ʻi ai ʻa e ngaahi maʻuʻanga fakamatala lahi ʻo kau ki he puke fakamāhiná, hangē ko e kau faiakó, kau ʻōfisa moʻuí, ngaahi fakamatala kuo pulusí ʻo aʻu ki he ngaahi filimi fakaeako. ʻOku ʻiloʻi ʻe he ngaahi mātuʻa lahi ko e ngaahi maʻuʻanga fakamatala ko ení ʻoku faʻa ʻomai ai ʻa e fakamatala mahuʻinga ki he natula ʻo e puke fakamāhiná pea pehē ki hono tauhi ke maʻá. Kae kehe, ʻoku ʻi ai nai ʻa e ngaahi fehuʻi mo e ngaahi fiemaʻu ʻa e tamaiki fefiné ʻoku ʻikai lave ki ai ʻa e ngaahi maʻuʻanga fakamatala ia ko ení. Naʻa mo ʻenau ʻiloʻi ʻa e meʻa ke fai ʻi he taimi ʻoku hoko ai ʻenau puké, ʻoku faʻa veiveiua ʻa e tamaiki fefiné fekauʻaki mo e founga ke fekuki ai mo e ngaahi ongoʻi kehekehe ʻoku fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná.

Ko e ngaahi kui-fefiné, fanga tokoua lalahí pea tautefito ki he ngaahi faʻeé ʻoku lava ke nau tokoni ʻi hono ʻomai ʻa e fakamatala lahi ange mo e poupou fakaeongo ʻa ia ʻoku fiemaʻu ʻe he tamaiki fefiné. ʻOku faʻa lahi ange ʻa e vakai ʻa e tamaiki fefiné ki heʻenau faʻeé ko e maʻuʻanga fakamatala mahuʻinga taha ia fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná.

Fēfē ʻa e ngaahi tamaí? ʻOku ongoʻi mā ʻa e tamaiki fefine tokolahi ke talanoa kia kinautolu ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná. ʻOku fiemaʻu ʻe he niʻihi ʻenau tamaí ke nau tokoniʻi kinautolu ʻi ha founga kehe ʻaki ʻenau poupouʻi mo mahinoʻi kinautolu, lolotonga ia ʻoku saiʻia ange ʻa e niʻihi ia ke ʻoua ʻe kau mai ki ai ʻa e tamaí ia.

ʻI he ngaahi fonua lahi kuo tupulekina ai ʻi he ngaahi hongofuluʻi taʻu siʻi kuohilí ʻa e ngaahi fāmili ʻa ia ko e tamaí pē ʻokú ne tokangaʻí.a Ko ia ai, ʻe tokolahi ange ʻa e ngaahi tamai ʻe fiemaʻu ke nau tali ʻa e pole ʻo hono akoʻi honau ngaahi ʻofefiné ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná. Ko e ngaahi tamaí ni ʻe fiemaʻu ke nau alāanga mo e ngaahi moʻoni tefito ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná pea pehē ki he ngaahi liliu kehe fakaesino mo fakaeongo ʻoku hokosia ʻe honau ngaahi ʻofefiné. ʻE fili nai ʻa e ngaahi tamaí ke kumi faleʻi ki heʻenau ngaahi faʻeé tonu ki ha faleʻi ʻaonga mo ha tokoni ʻi he meʻá ni.

Taimi ke Kamata Fetalanoaʻaki Aí

ʻI he ngaahi fonua tuʻumālie, hangē ko ʻAmelika, Kōlea Tonga mo e ngaahi konga ʻo ʻIulope Hihifó, ko e fakaʻavalisi ʻo e taʻu ki he ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná ʻoku meimei ke ʻi he vahaʻa ʻo e taʻu 12 mo e 13, neongo ʻoku lava ke hoko tōmuʻa ia ʻi he taʻu 8 pe toe tuai ange ai ʻo aʻu ki he taʻu 16 pe 17. ʻI he ngaahi konga ʻo ʻAfilika mo ʻĒsia, ʻoku ʻalu ia ai ki he māʻolunga ange ʻa e taʻu ʻoku fakaʻavalisi ki he ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná. Ko e fakatātaá, ʻi Naisīlia ko e ʻavalisí ko e taʻu 15. Ko e ngaahi meʻa lahi, hangē ko e kēnisí, tuʻunga fakaʻekonōmiká, meʻakaí, ngāue fakaesinó mo e ʻi ha tuʻunga māʻolunga ʻa e ongoʻí ʻoku lava ke ne uesia ʻa e taimi ʻo e ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná.

ʻOku lelei tahá ke kamata talanoa ki ai mo hoʻo taʻahiné ki muʻa ʻi heʻene ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná. Ko ia ai, ko e ngaahi talanoa fekauʻaki mo e ngaahi liliu ʻi he sinó pea mo e puke fakamāhiná ʻoku totonu ke kamata tōmuʻa ia, ʻi he taimi ʻoku taʻu valu nai ai ʻa hoʻo taʻahiné. Te ke ongoʻi nai ʻoku fuʻu vave eni, ka ʻo kapau ʻoku ʻi he vahaʻa ʻo e taʻu valú mo e hongofulú ʻa hoʻo taʻahiné, ngalingali ʻoku ʻosi kamata ke matuʻotuʻa ʻa hono sinó ʻi loto ʻi he tupulaki ʻa e ngaahi hōmoné. Te ke fakatokangaʻi ʻa e ngaahi liliu fakaesino ʻi tuʻa ʻoku fekauʻaki mo e hoko ko e tokotaha lahí, hangē ko e tupu ʻa e foʻi huhú mo e lahi ʻa e fulufulu ʻi he sinó. Ko e tokolahi taha ʻo e tamaiki fefiné ʻoku puna honau sinó (tupu vave ʻi he lōloá mo e mamafá) ki muʻa pē ʻi he ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná.

Founga ke Talanoa Ai ki he Kaveingá

Ko e tamaiki fefine ʻoku nau fakaofiofi ki he ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná ʻoku nau faʻa fieʻilo fekauʻaki mo e meʻa ʻoku ʻamanekina ʻe hokó. Ngalingali kuo nau fanongo ʻi he tamaiki fefine kehe ʻi he ʻapiakó ʻi heʻenau fetalanoaʻaki ki he kaveingá ni. ʻOku ʻi ai ʻenau ngaahi fehuʻi, ka ʻoku faingataʻaʻia ʻa e tokolahi ʻi hono maʻu ʻa e ngaahi foʻi lea totonu ke fehuʻi ai fekauʻaki mo ia. ʻOku nau mā nai ʻi he talanoa fekauʻaki mo e kaveingá.

ʻOku hoko ʻa e meʻa tatau ki he ngaahi mātuʻá. Neongo ko e ngaahi faʻeé ʻoku faʻa hoko ko e maʻuʻanga fakamatala tefito kinautolu ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná, ʻoku nau faʻa ongoʻi taʻemateuteu mo faingataʻaʻia ʻi hono talanoaʻi ʻa e kaveingá ni. Mahalo pē ko e anga eni hoʻo ongoʻí. Ko ia ʻoku anga-fēfē hoʻo kamata ha talanoa mo hoʻo taʻahiné ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná?

Ko e tamaiki fefine ki muʻa ʻi he taʻu taha-tolú ʻa ia ʻoku nau fakaofiofi ki he ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná ʻoku ngalingali te nau mahinoʻi ha fakamatala faingofua mo hangatonu. Ko e fakamatala ko iá ʻe kau nai ai pe ʻoku faʻa tuʻo fiha ʻa e puke fakamāhiná, ko e hā hono lōloá, pe ko e hā e lahi ʻo e toto ʻoku haʻu ki tuʻá. Ko ia ai, ʻi he muʻaki tuʻunga pē ʻo e ako ki he puke fakamāhiná, ʻe lelei nai ke tokangataha ki he ngaahi tafaʻaki fakavavevave mo ʻaonga ʻo e founga ke fekuki ai mo e puke fakamāhiná. Tānaki atu ki ai, ʻe fiemaʻu nai ke ke tali ʻa e ngaahi fehuʻi hangē ko ení: ʻE fēfē ʻa e anga ʻo e ongoʻí? pe Ko e hā ʻoku totonu ke u ʻamanekiná?

Ki mui ai, te ke loto nai ke talanoa ki he ngaahi fakaikiiki ʻo e natula ʻo e puke fakamāhiná. ʻI he taimi ʻe niʻihi, ʻe lava ke ke maʻu ai ha ngaahi fakamatala fakaefakahinohino mei he kau ʻōfisa moʻuí pe mei he laipelí pe ko e fale tohí. Ko e ngaahi tohi ko iá ʻe ʻaonga nai ia ʻi hono fakamatalaʻi ʻa e ngaahi tuʻunga fakaikiikí. ʻE saiʻia nai ʻa e tamaiki fefine ʻe niʻihi ke nau lau pē ʻe kinautolu ʻa e fakamatala ko ení. ʻE ongoʻi fiemālie nai ʻa e niʻihi kapau te ke lau fakataha ia mo kinautolu.

Fili ha feituʻu lōngonoa ke kamata ai ʻa e fetalanoaʻakí. Kamataʻaki ha talanoa faingofua fekauʻaki mo e anga ʻo e tupu haké pea mo e hoko ʻo fuʻu fefiné. Mahalo pē ʻe lava ke ke pehē: “ʻI ha ʻaho vavé ni mai te ke hokosia ai ha meʻa mātuʻaki fakanatula ʻa ia ʻoku hoko ki he tamaiki fefine kotoa pē. ʻOkú ke ʻiloʻi ko e hā ia?” Pe ʻe kamata nai ha faʻē ʻaki ha fakamatala kiate ia, hangē ko ení: “ʻI he taimi naʻá ku taʻu tatau ai mo koé, naʻe kamata ai ke u fifili pe ʻe fēfē ʻa e taimi te u puke fakamāhina aí. Naʻá ku talanoa ki ai mo hoku ngaahi kaungāmeʻá ʻi he akó. Kuo kamata talanoa ki ai ʻa ho ngaahi kaungāmeʻá?” Feinga ke ʻiloʻi ʻa e meʻa ʻokú ne ʻosi ʻiloʻi fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná pea fakatonutonu ha maʻu hala pē. Mateuteu ki he moʻoniʻi meʻa ko ia ʻe fiemaʻu nai ʻi hoʻomo ʻuluaki fetalanoaʻakí ke ke fai ʻa e meimei lahi taha ʻo e talanoá.

ʻI he tuʻunga ko ha fefine ʻa ia ʻoku ʻikai ha veiveiua naʻe ʻi ai hoʻo ngaahi loto-moʻua mo e hohaʻa ʻo fekauʻaki mo e ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná, ʻe lava ke ke ngāueʻaki ʻa hoʻo hokosia fakafoʻituituí ʻi hono talanoaʻi ʻa e kaveingá ni. Ko e hā naʻá ke fiemaʻu ke ke ʻiloʻí? Ko e hā naʻá ke loto ke ʻiloʻí? Ko e hā ʻa e fakamatala naʻe ʻaongá? Feinga ke ʻomai ha vakai mafamafatatau ʻo fekauʻaki mo e ngaahi tafaʻaki ʻaonga mo fakahohaʻa ʻo e puke fakamāhiná. Mateuteu ke tali ha ngaahi fehuʻi.

Ko ha Meʻa ke Hokohoko Atu Hono Faí

Ko e ako ki he puke fakamāhiná ʻoku totonu ke vakai ki ai ko ha meʻa ia ke hokohoko atu hono faí kae ʻikai ko ha talanoa ke fai tuʻo taha pē. ʻOku ʻikai fiemaʻu ke ke fakamatalaʻi ʻa e fakaikiiki kotoa pē ʻi he taimi pē ʻe taha. Ko e fuʻu fakamatala lahi ʻoku fai fakaʻangatahá ʻe lava ke hoko ʻo taulōfuʻu ia ki ha taʻahine. Ko e fānaú ʻoku nau ako ʻa e ngaahi meʻá ʻi ha tuʻunga fakakongokonga. Pehē foki, ʻe fiemaʻu nai ke toutou fai ʻa e fakamatala tatau ʻi he ngaahi tuʻunga kehekehe. ʻI he tupu ʻo lalahi ange ʻa e tamaiki fefiné, ʻoku nau malava ange ai ke mahinoʻi ʻa e ngaahi fakaikiiki lahi.

Ko e toe meʻa tefito ʻe taha he ko e ngaahi fakakaukau ʻa e tamaiki fefiné ki he puke fakamāhiná ʻoku liliu ia ʻi he taimi kotoa ʻo ʻenau kei finemuí. Hili hono maʻu ʻe hoʻo taʻahiné ʻa e taukei lahi ange ʻi heʻene puke fakamāhiná, ngalingali te ne fetaulaki ai mo e ngaahi veiveiua pea mo e ngaahi fehuʻi foʻou. Ko ia ai, ʻoku fiemaʻu ke hokohoko atu hoʻo talanoa mo iá mo tali ʻa ʻene ngaahi fehuʻí. Tokangataha ki he meʻa ʻoku ʻaonga mo feʻungamālie taha ki he taʻu ʻo hoʻo taʻahiné mo ʻene malava ke mahinoʻí.

Kamataʻi ʻa e Talanoá

Ka ko e hā te ke faí kapau ʻoku hā ʻoku ʻikai ke mahuʻingaʻia ʻa hoʻo taʻahiné ʻi he kaveingá? Mahalo pē ʻoku ʻikai ke fie talanoa ʻo fekauʻaki mo e ngaahi meʻa fakafoʻituituí. Pe mahalo ʻokú ne fiemaʻu pē ha taimi ʻe ongoʻi fiemālie feʻunga ai ke fehuʻi ʻo kau ki he kaveingá. ʻE aʻu nai ʻo ne pehē ʻokú ne ʻosi ʻiloʻi ʻa e meʻa kotoa pē ʻoku fiemaʻu ke ne ʻilo ki aí.

ʻI ha fakatotolo ʻe taha ʻo e tamaiki fefine kalasi ono ʻi ʻAmeliká, ko e tokolahi taha ʻo e tamaiki fefiné naʻa nau fakakaukau kuo nau mateuteu ki he ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná. Kae kehe, ʻi hono fakafehuʻi lahi angé, naʻe hā mahino ai naʻe taʻekakato ʻenau ʻiló pea ʻasi mei ai ne nau ʻosi tali ko e moʻoni, ha ngaahi fakamatala hala kehekehe naʻe makatuʻunga ʻi he ngaahi sīpinga fakakaukau fakafonuá mo e ngaahi fanangá. Ko ia, naʻa mo e pehē ʻe hoʻo taʻahiné ʻokú ne ʻosi mateuteu ki he puke fakamāhiná, ʻoku kei fiemaʻu pē ke ke talanoa kiate ia ʻo fekauʻaki mo ia.

ʻE ngalingali ko koe ia ʻe pau ke ke kamataʻi ha ngaahi talanoa nounou ʻo fekauʻaki mo e puke fakamāhiná pea hokohoko atu ai. Ko e moʻoni, ko e fatongia fakaemātuʻa ia ʻoʻou. Pe ʻokú ne fakahā mai ʻoku fiemaʻu tokoni ʻi he taimi ko ení pe ʻikai ʻoku fiemaʻu ʻe hoʻo taʻahiné ʻa hoʻo tokoní. Te ke ongoʻi feifeitamaki nai mo taʻefeʻunga, kae ʻoua ʻe foʻi. Kātaki. ʻI he faai atu ʻa e taimí, ʻoku ʻikai ha veiveiua ʻe ʻiloʻi ai ʻe hoʻo taʻahiné ʻa hono mahuʻinga moʻoni ʻa hoʻo ngaahi feingá.

[Fakamatala ʻi lalo]

[Fakamatala ʻi he peesi 11]

ʻOku lelei tahá ke talanoa mo hoʻo taʻahiné ki muʻa ʻi heʻene ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná

[Puha ʻi he peesi 13]

FOUNGA KE TALANOA AI KI HOʻO TAʻAHINÉ ʻO FEKAUʻAKI MO E PUKE FAKAMĀHINÁ

❖ Feinga ke ʻiloʻi ʻa e meʻa ʻokú ne ʻosi ʻiloʻí. Fakatonutonu ʻa e ngaahi maʻu halá. Fakapapauʻi ʻokú mo maʻu ʻa e fakamatala totonú.

❖ Fakamatalaʻi ʻa e meʻa kuó ke hokosiá. ʻI he fakakaukau atu pea mo hono fakamatalaʻi ange ʻa e meʻa naʻá ke hokosia tonu ʻi hoʻo puke fakamāhiná, ʻe lava ke ke ʻoatu ai ha poupou fakaeongo ʻa ia ʻoku fiemaʻu lahi ki hoʻo taʻahiné.

❖ Fai ha fakamatala ʻaonga. Ko e ngaahi fehuʻi anga-maheni ʻoku ʻeke ʻe he tamaiki fefiné ʻoku kau ai eni: “Ko e hā te u faí ʻo kapau te u puke fakamāhina ʻi ʻapiako?” “Ko e hā ʻa e ngaahi meʻa puke fakamāhina ke u ngāueʻakí?” “ʻE anga-fēfē ʻeku ngāueʻaki iá?”

❖ Fakamatalaʻi ʻi he tuʻunga faingofua ʻa e ngaahi moʻoniʻi meʻá. Feʻunuʻaki ʻa e fakamatalá ki he taʻu ʻo hoʻo taʻahiné mo ʻene malava ke mahinoʻi iá.

❖ Poupouʻi ke hokohoko atu ʻa e akó. Kamata talanoa mo hoʻo taʻahiné ki muʻa ke aʻu ki heʻene ʻuluaki puke fakamāhiná, pea hokohoko atu ʻa e ngaahi talanoa ko iá ʻo fakatatau ki he fiemaʻú, naʻa mo e hili ʻene kamata puke fakamāhiná.

[Fakatātā ʻi he peesi 12, 13]

Mahinoʻi ia. ʻE ʻikai nai fie talanoa ʻa hoʻo taʻahiné ʻo fekauʻaki mo e ngaahi meʻa fakafoʻituituí