Intlungu Yokukhulula Abantwana

“Umyeni wam wayendilumkisile mhla safumana umntwana wethu wokuqala—‘Ukukhulisa abantwana, sithandwa, yinkqubo ende oya kuze wahlukane nayo ngeny’ imini.’”—Ourselves and Our Children—A Book by and for Parents.

ABAZALI abaninzi bavuya—bade bachulumance—xa befumana umntwana wabo wokuqala. Phezu kwazo zonke iingxaki, iziphazamiso, iintlungu, udandatheko nonxunguphalo olubangelwa kukuba ngumzali, ukuba nabantwana kunokubangela uvuyo olukhulu. Malunga neminyaka engamawaka amathathu eyadlulayo, iBhayibhile yathi: “Abantwana basisipho esivela ENKOSINI; bayintsikelelo yokwenene.”—INdumiso 127:3, Today’s English Version.

Sekunjalo, iBhayibhile ivakalisa esi siprofeto sixhokonx’ iingcinga: “Indoda yomshiya uyise nonina.” (Genesis 2:24) Ngokuqhelekileyo abantwana abakhulileyo bayalishiya ikhaya ngenxa yezizathu ezahlukeneyo—ukuze baqhubeke nemfundo okanye basebenze, bandise ubulungiseleli babo bamaKristu, batshate. Kodwa oku kuba buhlungu gqitha kwabanye abazali. Bavumela amatiletile abantwana babo okuzimela ababangele—ngokutsho komnye umbhali—“bazive bengahlonelwa, becatshukisiwe, behlaziwe, besongelwa okanye beshiywe kwesinomhlwa.” Oku ngokufuthi kusoloko kukhokelela kwiingxaki ezingapheliyo zentsapho. Ngenxa yokuba bengavumi ukuyamkela into yokuba ngenye imini abantwana babo baza kulishiya ikhaya, abanye abazali ababaxhobiseli ubuntu obukhulu. Ukungakhathali okulolo hlobo kunokuba nemiphumo ebuhlungu: kunokuvelisa abantu abakhulileyo abangakwaziyo ukunyamekela ikhaya, abangakwaziyo ukunyamekela intsapho, okanye abangakwaziyo ukufumana umsebenzi baze bawugcine.

Intlungu ebangelwa kukwahlukana inokuba ngakumbi kwiintsapho ezinomzali omnye. Omnye umzali ongenaqabane ogama linguKaren uthi: “Mna nentombi yam siyintlaka nexolo; siye sakha ubuhlobo obusenyongweni. Naphi na apho ndiya khona, bendihamba naye.” Ulwalamano olusenyongweni lwabazali nabantwana luxhaphakile kumakhaya anomzali omnye. Liyaqondakala elokuba, ukuphulukana nokusondelelana ngolo hlobo kunokubangela intlungu.

Noko ke, incwadi ethi Traits of a Healthy Family ibakhumbuza oku abazali: “Ubomi bentsapho bubandakanya oku: ukukhulisa imveku engakwazi ukuzenzela nto ukuze ibe ngumntu okhulileyo ozimeleyo.” Yandula ke ilumkise ngelithi: “Ukungakwazi kwabazali ukukhulula abantwana kungunozala weengxaki ezininzi zentsapho.”

Kuthekani ngawe? Ngaba ungumzali? Ukuba kunjalo, ngaba sele ululungele usuku lwaxa kuya kufuneka ukhulule abantwana bakho? Ibe kuthekani ngabantwana bakho? Ngaba ubaxhobisela ukuba bakwazi ukuzimela ngokuphumelelayo?