Ukutyelela Umguli—Indlela Yokunceda

UMHLOBO wakho ulaliswe esibhedlele, yaye ngokuqinisekileyo ubungathanda ukumtyelela. Yintoni ofanele uyithethe nofanele uyenze? Yintoni onokumphathela yona? Yintoni ebiya kuba lolona ncedo lukhethekileyo? Yaye ngaba kukho zinto zithile ofanele ukuphephe ukuzithetha okanye ukuzenza?

Ufuna utyelelo lwakho lube yingenelo, ingekuko nje ukuthi, “Bhota,” nokufane nje uthi “Uphila njani” uze ngokukhawuleza ube sele usithi “Hayi ke ndisemkile,” mhlawumbi ube sele umgibisela ngecwecwe elithi “Uchache msinya” nje ukuze ujongwe kakuhle. Ngoko ke yintoni ofanele uyenze kule meko?

Into yokuqala emasikucebise yona yile: Sebenzisa ubulumko ngokuphathelele ubude bexesha lokutyelela. Unokumbuza umguli okanye intsapho yakhe ngelona xesha lifanelekileyo, njengexesha laxa engasayi kuba exakeke gqitha zezinye iindwendwe okanye izalamane ezisondeleyo. Kusenokuba lixesha elihle gqitha ukutyelela ngobusuku bangaphambi kotyando xa umguli esenokungenelwa yincoko nje eyonwabisayo neyokumenza alibale ngoku kunokuba uze nje kamsinya emva kotyando, xa esenokuba usebuthathaka yaye esezintlungwini.

Amazwi Athethwa Zizilumko

Sisenokuqwalasela ibinzana elithi ‘incoko eyonwabisayo.’ Lindela ukuba nguwe oza kuqala incoko ebudeni botyelelo, yaye yigcine incoko ikwisantya esisengqiqweni. Umntu osesibhedlele akafanele azixhalabise ngokuba ngumamkeli-ndwendwe ofanelekileyo kuwe. Usenokuwuthabathela kuwe loo mthwalo ngokuba ngumntu oncokolayo nonembonakaliso yobuhlobo. Ke ngoko, naku ofanele ukuthethe, nofanele ungakuthethi.

Musa ukuza utsho ngobuso obuthe rhubaxa nobuthe shwace, kwanokuba kubonakala ngathi imeko yomguli ayiginyisi mathe. Umbhali osisilumko weMizekeliso uthi: “Intliziyo evuyileyo iyalungisa, ichachise; umoya odakumbileyo uyawomisa amathambo.” (IMizekeliso 17:22) Ngoko, khumbula, kuyimbopheleleko yakho ukuyigcina incoko iyekhuthazayo yaye imyoli.​—⁠IMizekeliso 25:11; thelekisa uIsaya 41:⁠13.

Ezona ndaba zakutshanje ezivela kwintsapho yomguli okanye ebandleni zisenokuba zezomdla yaye zezakhayo, ingakumbi ukuba ziindaba ezimnandi. Kwakhona, musa ukuwulibala umphumo ukuhlekisa okunawo ekuphiliseni; khangela amathuba okwenza umguli ancume okanye ahleke. Ulungelelwano luyafuneka koku. Akutyeleli ngenjongo yokuba ngumhlekisi okanye irharha lasemibonisweni kodwa ukubonisa inkxalabo novelwano lokwenyaniso.

Kwakhona kufuneka umguli abe nentembelo. Ngaloo ndlela, lumka ungathethi ngendlela yokugxeka ugqirha okanye isibhedlele. Ngokuqhelekileyo kuhle ukuba ungathelekisi imeko yomguli okanye ingxaki yakhe nokwenzeka kuwe okanye kothile owakhe wanengxaki efanayo, ngaphandle kokuba umphumo waba mhle. Wonke umntu wahlukile, yaye imeko yomguli ngamnye yahlukile kweyomnye.​—⁠IMizekeliso 18:⁠13.

Into yokugqibela ofanele uyiphawule ngencoko yakho yile: Ngaba wakhe wanamava abuhlungu nakruqulayo okuba nepholopholo lomntu othetha angayeki, oku kanye kwengxolo yamanzi eeNgxangxasi zeIguaçú? Wawukruqukile, akunjalo na? Ngoko nceda musa ukuba ngumntu onjalo xa utyelele umhlobo okanye isalamane sakho esisesibhedlele. Ngoxa ukuthetha kwakho kufanele kube mnandi kuze kukhuthaze, lawula ubungakanani bamazwi akho nesantya aphuma ngaso. Akukho sizathu sakuzenza isinxadanxada, ngokungathi ufanele uzalise yonke imizuzwana ngamazwi. Nexesha enilichitha kunye nithe cwaka linokuba lelithuthuzelayo. Ewe, lumkela ukuthi kanti wongezelela kukudinwa komguli ngabo basoloko bengoonkqo molweni ngokuthulula amazwi angaphele ndawo.

Utyelelo Lufanele Lube Lude Kangakanani?

Kweminye imimandla yehlabathi, intsapho phantse ihlala ngokupheleleyo nomguli esibhedlele. Isenokulindelwa ukuba ihlambe loo mntu ize ilungiselele nokutya, ngaloo ndlela utyelelo olunjalo lufanele lwenziwe lude. Kodwa kwinkoliso yezibhedlele, ixesha lokutyelela lisikelwe umda ukuze umguli angadiniswa gqitha yaye nabasebenzi besibhedlele bakwazi ukwenza imisebenzi yabo. Ngaloo ndlela, kwiimeko ezininzi utyelelo lwakho lufanele lungadluleli ngaphaya kweyure enye ukuba usisalamane okanye umhlobo osenyongweni womguli lowo, yaye isiqingatha seyure ukuba usisinxulumani nje esiqhelekileyo. Kuthekani ukuba umguli ukucela ukuba uhlale ixesha elidana? Sekunjalo kuhle ukulusikel’ umda utyelelo lwakho, kuba kusenokwenzeka ukuba udiniwe yaye ugwebo lwakhe alulungelelananga. Kambe ke, ufanele usebenzise eyakho ingqiqo, kodwa ingongoma eyintloko yile, musa ukulwenza lude ngokugqithiseleyo utyelelo lwakho.

Elo cebiso lifuna ukuqwalaselwa ngokukhethekileyo ukuba umguli ubonakala eneendwendwe ezininzi gqitha ngaphezu kokuba kumlungele yena okanye inkqubo yesibhedlele. Enyanisweni, ukuchitha nje imizuzu embalwa izihlandlo eziliqela kokona kulungileyo yaye kubonakalisa inkxalabo kunotyelelo olude olunye. Kwakhona, khumbula ukuba kufuneka ubuchule ukuba umguli unezalamane ezingayiginyi ngokupheleleyo into yokuba utyelele apho.​—⁠Thelekisa IMizekeliso 25:⁠17.

Uncedo Onokulunikela

Kwanangaphambi kokuba uqalise utyelelo lwakho, olunye uhlobo lokulungiselela kusengaphambili luya kuba luncedo. Ngaba kukho okuthile okuluncedo onokuza nako? Kuthekani ngencwadi entsha yokufunda? Mhlawumbi ngolo suku ufumene ngeposi eyona nkupho yakho intsha yephephancwadi nomguli akunandiphayo ukulifunda. Umguli usenokuchukumiseka kukulungela kwakho ukuyincamela yena inkupho yakho yoncwadi entsha oyixabisileyo. Usenokude ucele ukumfundela inqaku elithile okanye amabini oye wawafumanisa ebangela umdla ngokukhethekileyo.

Ziziphi ezinye izinto onokuza nazo? Okuthile okuncinane okuya kumkhumbuza wena njengeentyatyambo okanye iziqhamo kunokubangela azive onwabile ngolo suku. Enye ehlaziyayo inokuba sisimungumenye esithandwa gqitha ngumguli okanye ukutya okuthile okwenziwe ekhaya​—⁠ukuba oko kuvumelekile. Usenokufuna amacebiso entsatsheni ngezinto ezinjalo okanye ubuze abongikazi kwanangaphambi kokuba ungene nazo kwelo gumbi.

Usenokubuza nogqirha okanye abongikazi enoba akukho nto unokumphathela yona umguli okanye onokumenzela yona enokuwenza lula umthwalo kubo okanye imenze azive onwabe ngakumbi. Basenokuluvuyela uncedo lwakho.

Ngaba kukho ezinye iindlela ofuna ukunceda ngazo? Buza umguli ngezinye izinto ezincinane eziluncedo. Ngubani omhambisela okanye omphathela iposi? Ngaba ungacela ukuya kujonga indlu yakhe okanye igumbi lakhe, mhlawumbi ube nabahlobo abaza kukuncedisa ukuze niyicoce ngaphambi kokuba umguli abuyele ekhaya? Ngaba kufuneka umntu wokususa ikhephu kwiindledlana, wokunkcenkceshela izityalo, okanye wokuthabatha amanyathelo okwenza loo ndlu ibonakale njengenabantu ukuze ingabizi amasela? Ngaba uxhalabele ukunyanyekelwa kwesilwanyana sakhe sasekhaya? Umguli usenokuba ucinga ngezi zinto nezinye kodwa akasokuze athethe ngazo de ubuze. Ukubuza kwakho ngobubele nako kuya kuba luncedo ukugxininisa kwelokuba enyanisweni uyakhathala.

Lifanelekile ilizwi lesilumkiso ngendlela yokuzilungisa ngoxa utyelela isibhedlele. Nangona oku kunokuvakala kungento kunokuthethwa ngayo, indlela onxiba ngayo nowenza ngayo izinto inokuchaphazela indlela umguli aphathwa ngayo ngabasebenzi basesibhedlele. Basenokuchukumiseka gqitha xa bebona umguli etyelelwa ngabantu abazilungise kakuhle. Xa kubonwa iindwendwe eziliqela ezindilisekileyo zinenkxalabo ngempilo-ntle yomguli, abo basebenza esibhedlele banokugqiba kwelokuba lo mguli unokuba ngumntu othile oxabisekileyo, ekubeni, eneneni enguye. IBhayibhile ikhankanya ukuba ubani ufanele anxibe ‘ngendlela efanele abo bathi bahlonela uThixo,’ yaye ngokwenza njalo, usenokukhuthaza abasebenzi ukuba bamphathe ngentlonelo umguli.​—⁠1 Timoti 2:9, 10.

Ukuba Kukho Ingxaki Enkulu

Ngamaxesha athile, umguli omtyelelayo usenokuba unengxaki enkulu yokuthetha nabasebenzi basesibhedlele. Umbuzo obalulekileyo onokuwubuza ngaphandle kokungenelela kwimicimbi yobuqu yomguli, ngothi, “Ugqirha ucinga ukuba unjani?” Ukuba izinto azihambi kakuhle, yaye ulilungu lentsapho okanye umlungiseleli onembopheleleko, usenokunikela uncedo. Ngenxa yempilo-ntle yomguli, kusenokufuneka ibe nguwe othabatha inyathelo lokuqala ngokufuna inkcazelo engakumbi kubasebenzi basesibhedlele. Okanye mhlawumbi usenokucela ukuba uhambe naloo ntsapho, esenokuthi ngesizathu esithile ibe madolw’ anzima ukuthetha nogqirha.

Ukuba kunjalo, into ebalulekileyo ofanele uyikhumbule kukuba ungoyikiswa yindlela ezenziwa ngayo izinto esibhedlele okanye ngabasebenzi bakhona. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba umguli ukwigumbi labagula gqitha (intensive-care unit), engqongwe zizo zonke iintlobo zoomatshini nangabantu abagulel’ ukufa. Abasebenzi basenokubonakala bexakeke gqitha okanye bekrwada. Benjenjalo kuba befuna woyike ukubaphazamisa, kungasathethwa ke ngokuthetha nantoni na enokuba lucelomngeni. Kodwa ukuba ngokufanelekileyo ungummeli womguli, wena (naye) ninelungelo lokufumana iimpendulo ezicacileyo nezinye iindlela ezinokwenziwa ngazo izinto. Akumele ukatyiswe kumzamo wakho de oku ukufunayo kwenziwe. Ngoxa ulumkela ukuba sisilungulela kubo, khumbula ukuba kwanoYesu kumzekeliso wakhe wagxininisa ukuba maxa wambi kuyimfuneko ukuzingisa ekuceleni ukufumana inyameko okanye inkcazelo umntu anelungelo layo.​—⁠Luka 18:​1-⁠6.

Ukukhangela Emva Kutyelelo Lwakho

Emva kokugqiba kwakho utyelelo lwakho, umshiya umguli onwabile, usenokucinga ngoko ukuthethileyo noko ukwenzileyo. Ingcinga enjalo isenokukunceda usebenzise ingqiqo ngendlela utyelelo lwakho olulandelayo, kulo mguli okanye komnye, oluya kuba loluyingenelo ngakumbi ngayo luze lube lolubangela imvakalelo eyanelisayo.

Lilonke, kuninzi onokukuphumeza ngotyelelo lwasesibhedlele. Khumbula ukulungiselela nokuba nomnqweno wokunceda. Ngokusebenzisa eli thuba, usenokwenza eyona nto ilungileyo uze uzingqine “usisihlobo esinamathelayo kunomzalwana [wokwenyama].”​—⁠IMizekeliso 18:​24, NW.

[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 10]

Utyelelo Lwakho Oluluncedo Kumguli

1. Lungiselela.

2. Cinga ngemeko yomguli. Musa ukuhlala ixesha elide.

3. Nxiba ngendlela efanelekileyo.

4. Yiba ngokhokelayo encokweni, kodwa wabale amazwi akho.

5. Oko ukuphathayo nocela ukukwenza makube luncedo.

6. Yiba ngonobubele nowakhayo.

7. Phinda wenze utyelelo olufutshane.