Iimvakalelo Ezidakumbisayo—Zinokoyiswa Njani?
INYATHELO lokuqala lokulawula iimvakalelo ezidakumbisayo nali: Zazi iingcinga eziphosakeleyo.
Elesibini: Sebenzela ekuzilungiseni iingcinga eziphosakeleyo. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba ubucinga ukuba, ‘Andize ndenze nanye into ngokufanelekileyo,’ kuthabathele indawo oku ngokuthi, ‘Ndiyafana nje nabanye abantu; izinto ezininzi ndizenza ngokufanelekileyo, kodwa nam ndiyazenza iimpazamo.’
Musa ukulindela ukuba uza konwaba ngoko nangoko emva kokuba uzilungisile (nangona kusenokuba njalo), yaye musa ukuqhubeka ucingana naloo mbandela. Vela wenze isigqibo uze ugqithele kwinyathelo elilandelayo.
Inyathelo lesithathu kukusebenzela ukuyikhupha engqondweni yakho loo ngcinga ikukhathazayo. Zama ukuyikhupha ngamandla nangentembelo njengokuba ubuya kwenjenjalo ngokucinga ngokwenza ulwaphulo-mthetho olunzulu. Nangona usenokukwazi ukukwenza oku ngomzamo omkhulu engqondweni yakho, inyathelo lesine liluncedo kakhulu ekwenzeni oku: Milisela ingqondo yakho kwenye into, kwinto eyakhayo.
Oku kubalulekile ngenxa yokuba iingcinga eziphosakeleyo ngokuphindaphindiweyo ziya kuzama ukubuya engqondweni yakho. Kodwa into emnandi kukuba: Unokunikela ingqalelo epheleleyo kwinto enye kuphela ngexesha. Unokukungqina oku, ngokwakho, ngokuzama ukunikela ingqalelo ngokuzeleyo kwizinto ezimbini ngaxeshanye. Ukuba ingqondo yakho sele ixakeke ngokupheleleyo yenye into, kuya kuba nzima ukuba iingcinga zakho eziphosakeleyo zibuye.
Indlela iingcinga eziphosakeleyo ezinokuthatyathelwa indawo ngayo zezifanelekileyo izekeliswe nguGqr. Maxwell Maltz, othi: “Xa isidlali-macwecwe sakho sidlala umculo ongawuthandiyo, awuzami ukuwunyanzelisa ukuba uthandeke. . . . Usuka ulitshintshe icwecwe elo lidlalayo uze umculo ube ngowahlukileyo. Sebenzisa kwaobo buchule ‘kumculo’ ophuma kumatshini wakho ongaphakathi.”
Ewe, ngokufuthi iingcinga eziphosakeleyo ziba namandla gqitha ukuba zingakhutshwa nje ngokulula. Zimele zikhutshwe ngokuthatyathelwa indawo ngezinye. Faka “icwecwe” elahlukileyo, elifanelekileyo. Vula elinye “ijelo” elakhayo, “iziko” elahlukileyo uze umilisele ingqondo yakho kulo.
Kuya Kuba Nzima
La manyathelo mane angasentla kulula ukuwachaza, kodwa hayi indlela ekunzima ngayo ukuwalandela! Ngoko ke, musa ukumangaliswa ukuba ukulwa neengcinga neemvakalelo ezidakumbisayo kuyakunzimela ekuqaleni. Kulindele ukuba kube nzima, kodwa yazi ukuba ekuhambeni kwexesha kuya kuba lula.
Landela umzekelo kaCindy, umfundisi-ntsapho owakhuliswa ngumama olikhoboka lotywala. Kangangeminyaka uCindy wayekhathazwa ziimvakalelo zokuba netyala nezokunganqabiseki. Ngoko wagqiba kwelokuba ahlangabezane nale ngxaki. Yintoni awayenzayo?
UCindy uthi: “Okokuqala ndasebenzela ukwazi ezona ngcinga zazibangela ezo mvakalelo zam zidakumbisayo. Nanini na ezi ngcinga zivela, bendiya kuzihlolisisa kwakhona, ndiziqonde yaye ndizazi. Ngoko bendiya kusebenzela ukwenza ukuba kwesamele iingcinga ezifanelekileyo. Ndanyanzela ingqondo yam ukuba izinze kubantwana endandibafundisa nakwindlela endandinokubanceda ngayo. Ngokuthe ngcembe, kwaya kusiba lula, kwaye ndaziva ndikwazi ngakumbi ukuzilawula iimvakalelo zam.”
Kanti, usenokuzibuza . . .
Kutheni Kunzima Kangaka?
Ngaba kulula ukoyisa imikhwa emibi, enjengokuzingxala ngokutya okanye ukutshaya? Akunjalo! Inokoyiswa kuphela ngokwenza umgudu osengqiqweni nangokuzimisela, kangangexesha elide. Kwabaninzi, ukucinga phosakeleyo kungumkhwa, kwaye ngokufana neminye imikhwa emibi, kunzima ukuwoyisa.
Ukuba ukucinga phosakeleyo kungumkhwa kuwe, ukuwoyisa kuya kufuna ukuzimisela okufana noko kufuneka kumntu oyeka uhlobo oluthile lokutya okanye ogqiba kwelokuba ayeke ukutshaya.
Ingongoma kukuba, musa ukunikezela uze ugqibe kwelokuba uhlale udandathekile ngenxa yokuba kulula ukwenjenjalo. Namathela kumlo wakho nxamnye nokucinga phosakeleyo, kwanokuba kuthetha ukuwa uvuka kangangeenyanga ezininzi yaye mhlawumbi nokubuyela emva. Zimisele ngokungathi ubuziqeqeshela ukhuphiswano lweembaleki. Lindela imiphumo eza ekuhambeni kwexesha kunolwaneliseko lwangoko nangoko.
Ngaba Zinokupheliswa Ngokupheleleyo?
Ngaba iimvakalelo ezidakumbisayo zinokupheliswa ngokupheleleyo? Kaloku, ukuba ulindele ukuba nolonwabo olufezekileyo ngoku, uya kuhlangabezana nonxunguphalo nokuphoxeka. Kweli xesha ulonwabo lulinganiselwe yaye aluphelelanga. Kodwa sekunjalo oko kulunge ngakumbi kunokuvaleleka kubomi beemvakalelo ezidakumbisayo ezizingisayo nezityhafisayo.
Ngaba oku kuthetha ukuba iimvakalelo ezidakumbisayo azinakuze zoyiswe? Akunjalo. Ngokuchanileyo iBhayibhile ichaza ukuba le meko yokungafezeki siya kuba nayo okwethutyana nje, kodwa kukho ixesha elimisiweyo lokuba ipheliswe ngonaphakade. Oko kuya kwenzeka ngokukhawuleza xa uBukumkani bukaThixo, urhulumente wakhe wasemazulwini olawulwa nguYesu Kristu, ethabathela kuye ngokupheleleyo zonke izinto zomhlaba aze aqalise inkqubo yokubuyisela abantu emfezekweni. UYesu wayibiza le nkqubo ngokuthi “ukudalwa ngokutsha [okanye, “ukuzalwa ngokutsha,” umbhalo osemazantsi weNW ].”—Mateyu 19:28, NW; bona kwaneNdumiso 37:29; Mateyu 6:9, 10; ISityhilelo 21:3-5.
Noko ke, okwangoku ukukwamkela ukusikelwa kwethu umda kukungafezeki koluntu kuya kukwenza wonwabe. Kunokuba ugabadele ufuna impilo egqibeleleyo ngokwasengqondweni, uya kukhululeka ukuba usukele ezinye iinkalo zobomi. Yaye uya kufumana uxolo lwengqondo olukhulu ngakumbi nolonwabo ekwazini ukuba isicombululo sokugqibela seemvakalelo ezidakumbisayo sixhomekeke kwizandla zikaThixo uSomandla ezinokusinceda.
Ngaba la macebiso ayingcamango nje? Ngaba ngokwenene ayasebenza? Ewe ayasebenza, kunjengokuba la mava obomi alandelayo ebonisa.
[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 6]
Unokuthabathel’ indawo ukucinga phosakeleyo ngokucinga ngokufanelekileyo
[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 6]
Musa ukunikezela uze ugqibe kwelokuba uhlale udandathekile ngenxa yokuba kulula ukwenjenjalo
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 7]
Njengokulwela ukunciphisa umzimba, ukufunda ukulawula iimvakalelo zethu kufuna ixesha nomonde