Ukuba Nethemba Phezu Kwako Nje Ukugula

NGOKUBALISWA NGUKONSTANTIN MOROZOV

Ukuzalwa kwam ngoJulayi 20, 1936, ndandingenamathambo omeleleyo emzimbeni ngaphandle nje kokakayi namathambo omqolo. Amathambo am onke ayeyintlala ecekeceke enjengentlala yendlebe yomntu omdala. Ndandingaphantsi kwesiqingatha sekhilogram ubunzima. Ekuphela kwento eyayibonisa ukuba ndiphilile yayiyintliziyo eyayibetha kancinane, ndiphefumlela phantsi yaye ndishukuma nje kancinane.

NDANDINGUMNTWANA wesixhenxe kwabasithoba kwintsapho eyayihlala kwidolophana yaseSara, eUl’yanovsk Oblast, kumbindi waseRashiya. Xa ndandineeveki ezintathu ubudala, abazali bam bandisa ecaweni ukuze ndibhaptizwe. Umfundisi wandifefa ngamanzi ngokukhawuleza waza waxelela abazali bam ukuba bagoduke nam ngokukhawuleza, kuba wathi ndandiza kufa kwiiyure ezimbalwa.

NgoJanuwari 1937, abazali bam bandisa kwisixeko saseKazan’, ikomkhulu leriphabliki yeRashiya yaseTatarstan, ukuze ndibonwe zezinye iingcali. Kodwa ngoku ndandisele ndikwazi ukuthi “Mama,” “Tata,” nokuthi “Babushka” (Makhulu), yaye ndandiwazi amagama abakhuluwa bam. Emva kokuba oogqirha bendixilongile, baxelela abazali bam ukuba ndiza kufa kungekapheli nonyaka. Bacebisa ukuba ndibulawe ndize ndigcinwe kwiglasi ukuze ndibe luncedo kwizifundo zabafundi bezonyango. Hayi indlela endinombulelo ngayo kubazali bam abathandekayo ngenxa yokuba bangqisha ngonyawo phantsi bengavumi!

Ukubandezeleka Njengomntwana

Oko ndaba ngumntu, bendisoloko ndisezintlungwini. Sekunjalo, ndisengumntwana, ndandizama ukuba nesimo sengqondo esihle yaye ndizama ukuhleka ngokufuthi ndize ndinandiphe ubomi. Ndiye ndazigcina ndinjalo. Ngokuthe ngcembe amathambo am aqalisa ukomelela, yaye ndandikwazi ukuhlala nokukhasa. Ndandingakhuli njengomntwana oqhelekileyo yaye ndaba sisilima. Kodwa ndandingumfundi onesiphiwo, yaye xa ndandineminyaka emihlanu ubudala, ndandikwazi ukufunda nokubhala.

NgoMeyi 1941, umama wandisa ecaweni okwesibini. Kwakukho iqela labantu apho, yaye bonke babeguqile bethandaza. Elinye ibhinqa elingumlindi leza kuMama laza lambuza isizathu sokuba angaguqi. Xa uMama walibonisa mna, lahamba laza laya kuthetha nomfundisi. Ukubuya kwakhe, lo mlindi waphuma nathi waza wacebisa ukuba uMama andishiye ngaphandle aze angene yedwa. Wathi ngenxa yezono zabazali bam, ndiphiwe bona “ngongendawo.” UMama wagoduka elila. Ndakucinga oku kangangexesha elide. Ndandizibuza, ‘Ngubani lo “ungendawo”?’

Ngowe-1948, xa ndandineminyaka eli-12 ubudala, ndahamba noMama saya kwidolophana yaseMerenki kwiRiphabliki yaseChuvash, malunga neekhilomitha ezingama-80 ukusuka ekhaya. Apho kwakukho amanzi aphilisayo, yaye uMama wayenethemba lokuba ndiza kuphiliswa ngaloo manzi. Phakathi kwezinto abefundisi abandixelela ukuba ndizenze ukuze ndiphiliswe yayikukuba ndingatyi iintsuku ezintathu. Kwakhona kwakufuneka ndityiswe uMthendeleko ecaweni. Nangona ndandingenantembelo ecaweni, ndavuma. Olo hambo lwalulude kwaye ludinisa, kodwa ndanyamezela, ndizama ukuzigcina ndixakekile ndibuka indalo.

Icawa yayizele ngabantu. Ngoxa uMama wayendiphethe phakathi kwabantu, omnye umama osel’ ekhulile wandipha ilekese. Ndayithabatha ndaza ndayifaka epokothweni. Xa kwakufika ithuba lokuba ndamkele uMthendeleko, lo mama ukhulileyo wakhwaza wathi: “Mfundisi, ungamniki uMthendeleko! Ugqiba ukutya ilekese!” Ndamxelela ukuba le lekese isepokothweni, kodwa lo mfundisi wakhwaza esithi: “Mntwanandini oqaqadekileyo! Kutheni uxoka nje? Mkhupheleni ngaphandle kwendlu yecawa!” Noko ke, ngosuku olulandelayo, omnye umfundisi wandenzela inkonzo yoMthendeleko waza wandihlamba ngamanzi “angummangaliso.” Sekunjalo, akuzange kwenzeke mmangaliso. Ndaqhubeka ndigula.

Imfundo Endayizuzayo

Nangona ndandingumlwelwe, xa ndandikwiminyaka yeshumi elivisayo ndaqalisa ukufunda yaye ndazibekela usukelo lwemfundo. Ngowe-1956, ndaba lilungu leKomsomol (Young Communist League) yaye, ekuhambeni kwexesha, ndandifundisa ezembali kubantu abaselula beKomsomol. Ndandililungu leHome and Cultural Commission kwikhaya labaneziphene, yaye ndandikwasebenza njengomalathisi nomsasazi kanomathotholo.

Ngapha koko, ndandijongene nethala leencwadi ezishicilelwe kwikhasethi ukwenzela abantu abangaboniyo, yaye ndanyulwa ukuba ndibe lilungu leJudge’s Commission for the Fight Against Alcohol Abuse. Kwakhona ndaba nenxaxheba kumbutho weemvumi ezisaqalayo, ndicula yaye ndidlala izixhobo zomculo ezahlukahlukeneyo.

Kwikhaya Labaneziphene

Ngowe-1957, xa ndandineminyaka engama-21 ubudala, ngenxa yokugula ndanyanzeleka ukuba ndiye kuhlala kwikhaya labaneziphene. Sekunjalo, ndandingafuni ukunikezela. Ngo-Oktobha 1963, ndaya kwiProsthetic Science Research Institute of Moscow. Apho ndenza utyando izihlandlo ezili-18 ukuze ndolulwe imilenze.

Okokuqala, imilenze yam yolulwa. Ngoko ke, emva kweentsuku ezisibhozo, ndenziwa utyando. Emva koko, ndafakwa isamente emilenzeni ukuze ilungiselelwe utyando olulandelayo. Umongikazi wayelila xa wayebona indlela endandibandezeleka ngayo.

Ebudeni beenyanga ezine, ndafunda ukuhamba ngeentonga. Ngeentonga ndiyakwazi ukuziphakamisa ndibe bubude obuziisentimitha ezili-110. Ndingaphezulu kancinane nje kwiikhilogram ezingama-25 ubunzima. Emva kokuba sele ndikwazi ukuhamba ngeentonga, ndabuyela kwikhaya labaneziphene ngowe-1964. Ngelishwa, amathambo emilenze yam abuthathaka ayengakwazi ukusingatha ubunzima bomzimba wam, yaye kungekudala ndanyanzeleka ukuba ndikhase xa ndihamba okanye ndisebenzise isitulo esinamavili sabaguli. Ngoku ndisebenzisa esi situlo ukuze ndikwazi ukuhambahamba.

Andizange ndiphinde ndiye ecaweni. Kwaqhubeka kundikhathaza ukucinga ngokuba ndazalwa ngenxa “yongendawo.” Ndandimthanda kakhulu utata nomama, yaye ndandingakwamkeli ukuba bona noThixo babekek’ ityala ngemeko endikuyo. Ndazama ukuhlala ndinethemba. Ndandifuna ukubenzela okulungileyo abanye yaye, ngaphezu koko, ukungqina ukuba ndandikwazi ukukwenza oko.

Ukungaxhomekeki Mntwini

Ngowe-1970, ndatshata noLidia, phantse owayefe amalungu omzimba ukususela ebuntwaneni. Sazifunela indlu encinane, esahlala kuyo iminyaka eli-15. Ebudeni belo xesha sasizisebenzela ukuze siziphilise. Ndafunda ukulungisa iiwotshi nezinye izinto ezincinane.

Kangangethuba elide ndandisebenzisa inja eqeqeshiweyo ukuba indenzele izinto ezithile. Enyanisweni, mna nomntu owayeqeqeshe le nja senza into ekhethekileyo yokubopha le nja. Ndandinezinja ezimbini—enye inguVulkan yaye enye inguPalma. UPalma wayeliqabane elithembekileyo kangangeminyaka emininzi. Xa sisevenkileni, wayezifaka ngokwakhe izinto endifanele ndizithenge. Inye kuphela into awayengathandi ukuyenza kukulinda emva kwabanye xa sisiya kuhlawula. Wayephatha isipaji sam ngamazinyo, yaye wayenegwegwe kwibhanti lakhe lasentanyeni lokuphatha ingxowa yam yokuthenga.

Ngowe-1973 umama wagula kakhulu. Ekubeni ndandisoloko ndisekhaya, mna nomfazi wam sagqiba kwelokuba simphuthume aze kuhlala nathi. Ngelo xesha utata nabakhuluwa bam abahlanu babefile, yaye abanye abantakwethu abathathu babehlala kweminye imimandla yaseRashiya. Ngoxa uMama wayehlala nathi, ndandizama ukumenzela oko ndandinokukwenza. Ekugqibeleni wafa eneminyaka engama-85 ubudala.

Ngowe-1978, ndagqiba kwelokuba ndizakhele inqwelo-mafutha. Emva kokuzama ukwenza ezahlukahlukeneyo, ndagqibela ndenze efanelekileyo. IState Automobile Inspectorate yasekuhlaleni yandivumela ukuba ndenze uviwo lokuqhuba ndize ndiyibhalise le nqwelo-mafutha yam. Ndayibiza ngokuba nguOsa (Wasp). Mna nomfazi wam senza inqwelana eyayinokuthwala izinto ezinobunzima obuziikhilogram ezingama-300. Sasikwazi ukuhamba ngayo size silayishe nezinto kuyo. Le nqwelo-mafutha yasinceda de kwangowe-1985.

Malunga neli xesha iliso lam lasekunxele lalingaboni, yaye ndaqalisa ukungaboni kakuhle ngeliso lam lasekunene. Wandula ke uLidia wagula sisifo sentliziyo. NgoMeyi 1985, ngenxa yemeko yethu, sanyanzeleka ukuba siye kuhlala kwikhaya labaneziphene kwisixeko saseDimitrovgrad.

Isizathu Sokuba Ndonwabe Ngoku

Ngehlobo lowe-1990, amaNgqina kaYehova atyelela ikhaya lethu labaneziphene. Ndafumanisa ukuba oko ayekufundisa kwakubangel’ umdla. Andibonisa indinyana kwiVangeli kaYohane engendoda eyazalwa iyimfama. Ngokuphathelele yona, uYesu wathi: “Akonanga lo mntu ingengabo nabazali bakhe.” (Yohane 9:1-3) Andicacisela ukuba sizuze isono nokugula njengelifa kukhokho wethu uAdam.—Roma 5:12.

Phofu ke, ngaphezu koko ndachukunyiswa kukuba ekugqibeleni uThixo uza kubaphilisa bonke abo baza kuphila phantsi kolawulo loBukumkani boNyana wakhe, uYesu Kristu, xa kubuyiselwe iParadesi emhlabeni. (INdumiso 37:11, 29; Luka 23:43; ISityhilelo 21:3, 4) Zehla iinyembezi zovuyo, yaye ndasebeza ndisithi: “Ndiyifumene inyaniso, inyaniso, inyaniso!” Ndafundisisa iBhayibhile namaNgqina kaYehova kangangonyaka, yaye ngowe-1991, ndabhaptizwa emanzini ndifuzisela uzahlulelo lwam kuYehova uThixo.

Nangona ndandinqwenela ngamandla ukukhonza uYehova nokushumayela ngeenjongo zakhe ezintle, ndandijamelene nemiqobo emininzi. Ngaphambili, kwakungekho mfuneko ingako yokuba ndihambahambe, kodwa ngoku kufuneka ndabelane nabanye ngokholo lwam. Intsimi yam yokuqala yayilikhaya labaneziphene, apho kwakuhlala khona abantu abangaphezu kwama-300. Ukuze ndikwazi ukuqhagamshelana nabantu abaninzi kangangoko kunokwenzeka, ndacela ukuba ndabelwe ukusebenza kwigumbi lemibandela yasekhaya.

Ntsasa nganye ndandihlala kwindawo yam yokusebenza ndize ndenze umsebenzi endiwunikiweyo. Ebudeni balo msebenzi wam, ndiye ndanabahlobo abatsha abaninzi endiye ndabelana nabo ngeengxubusho ezibangela umdla zeBhayibhile. Abaninzi kubo baye bazamkela iincwadi namaphephancwadi aye abanceda baqonda iBhayibhile. Iindwendwe zide zaqhela ukuba ndizifundele iBhayibhile neempapasho ezisekelwe eBhayibhileni. Ngexesha lesidlo sasemini, ngokufuthi kubakho abantu abaninzi kwigumbi esihlala kulo mna nomfazi wam kangangokuba maxa wambi akubikho mntu unokungena.

Abazalwana bam noodade abangamaKristu abasebandleni lamaNgqina kaYehova baye bandinceda kakhulu kumsebenzi wokushumayela. Bandiphathela uncwadi olusekelwe eBhayibhileni yaye bachitha ixesha kunye nam nomfazi wam. Kwakhona bandinceda ukuba ndiye kwiHolo yoBukumkani kwiintlanganiso zebandla. Elinye iNgqina lathenga isithuthuthu esinenqwelana ukuze lindikhwelise. Abanye, abaneenqwelo-mafutha, bayakuvuyela ukuza baze bahambe nam ngeenyanga ezibandayo zobusika.

Ndinombulelo ngenyameko enothando enjalo, ndiye ndakwazi ukuya kwiindibano ezininzi, okanye kwiingqungquthela zemfundo zamaNgqina kaYehova. Eyokuqala yayiyindibano enkulu yezizwe ngezizwe eyayiseMoscow ngoJulayi 1993, apho kwabakho abantu abangama-23 743, abavela kumazwe angaphezu kwama-30. Ukuze ndikwazi ukubakho kuloo ndibano kwakuthetha uhambo lomgama onokuba ziikhilomitha ezili-1 000. Ukususela ngoko andizange ndiphoswe nayindibano enye yabantu bakaYehova.

Abantu abaphethe ikhaya lethu labantu abaneziphene bandihlonela kakhulu, nto leyo endiyibulela kakhulu. Iqabane lam, uLidia, endiye ndahlala nalo iminyaka engama-30, liyandixhasa lize lindincede, nangona lingavumelani neembono zam zonqulo. Kodwa ngaphezu kwako konke, uYehova uyandixhasa ngesandla sakhe esinamandla yaye undijizeka ngeentsikelelo zakhe ezibalaseleyo. Kungekudala kangako, ngoSeptemba 1, 1997, ndamiselwa njengovulindlela, njengoko abalungiseleli bexesha elizeleyo bamaNgqina kaYehova bebizwa njalo.

Bekusoloko kukho izihlandlo eziliqela ebomini bam xa intliziyo yam ibisenokuma ndize ndife. Hayi indlela endinombulelo ngayo ngoku kuba akuzange kwenzeke oko nokuba ndiye ndamazi ndaza ndamthanda uMthombo wobomi, uYehova uThixo! Ndifuna ukuqhubeka ndimkhonza kunye nabazalwana noodade bam bokomoya emhlabeni wonke lo gama intliziyo yam isaqhubeka ibetha.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 30]

Ndikunye nomfazi wam, uLidia

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 31]

Ndifundisa umfundi kwikhaya lethu labaneziphene