Ukuhlangabezana Nocelomngeni Lokuba Ngumama

Ekubeni abantwana bemela isizukulwana sexesha elizayo, ngoko ngokuqinisekileyo amabhinqa abakhulisayo afanele ahlonelwe, anikwe imbeko aze axhaswe. Nangona ihlabathi lanamhlanje liphixanis’ ingqondo xa kusiziwa kumbandela wokuba ngumama, iBhayibhile iqinisekisa ukuba abantwana bayintsikelelo evela kuThixo yaye banokwenza abazali bonwabe. (INdumiso 127:3-5) Sekunjalo, iZibhalo azikuthabathi njengento elula ukuba ngumama. IBhayibhile ithetha kakhulu ngocelomngeni lokuba ngumama.

Izigqibo ezenziwa ngabazali ngendlela ababakhulisa ngayo abantwana babo kunye nohlobo lomntu umama anguye iba nempembelelo enkulu nehlala ihleli kubomi babantwana babo nohlobo lwabantu abalulo. Ezi zigqibo zinokwenza ukuba abazali baguqule izinto ezininzi ebomini babo, ngoko kufuneka zenziwe ngenyameko. Eminye imibuzo enokubuzwa xa kusenziwa ezi zigqibo inokuquka umbuzo othi, Ngaba umama ufanele asebenze ngaphandle kwekhaya? Ukuba kunjalo, uza kusebenza ixesha elide kangakanani? Ngubani oza kunyamekela abantwana ngoxa umama esemsebenzini? Ekugqibeleni, abazali bafanele benze oko bakholelwa kukuba kokona kubalungeleyo abantwana babo noko kulungileyo emehlweni kaThixo.

Noko ke, oomama abafanele bazive bebodwa kucelomngeni lokwenza izigqibo zobulumko. Banokuthuthuzelwa ngamazwi kaIsaya 40:11, abonisa ukuba uThixo ubakhathalela ngokukhethekileyo oomama abaneentsana, yaye uza ‘kubakhaphela ngenyameko.’ UThixo ubonisa ukuba ubakhathalela ngokukhethekileyo ngokwenza ukuba eBhayibhileni kubekho iqela lemigaqo eyenza ukuba ngumama konwabise kuze kube yimpumelelo.

❖ Yiba ngumntu osengqiqweni: AmaKristu afanele aziwe ngokuba sengqiqweni. (Filipi 4:5) UJanet Penley, umbhali okwangumama, wafunda ukuxabiseka kwalo mgaqo. Uthi: “Ndandinamabhongo gqitha xa ndandiqala ukuba ngumama. Ndandifuna ukuba ngumama obhetele kunabo bonke. Ngoko ndafunda zonke iincwadi endandinokuzifunda ndaza ndaphulaphula zonke iingcali ezikhoyo. Kodwa kunokuba ndizive ndifeze okuthile yaye ndanelisekile, ndaziva ndingakufanelanga ukuba ngumama yaye ndixinezelekile.” Ucacisa esithi “ukuba nolindelo olugqithiseleyo uze uzame ukuzenza ‘ubani ongenguye’ kuyatyhafisa yaye kubangela ukuba uzive unetyala.”

❖ Yenza izinto zibe lula: Iphephancwadi iNewsweek lathi: “Kobu bomi bumaxhaphetshu, iintsapho azifuni kuphulukana namava okukhulisa abantwana nolonwabo olufumaneka entsatsheni.” Yiloo nto kanye ebangela ukuba oomama abaninzi bazame ukuphila ubomi obulula. Unokukwenza njani oku? Okokuqala, zazi ezona zinto zibalulekileyo, uze unikel’ ingqalelo ‘kwizinto ezibaluleke ngakumbi,’ kuquka ixesha nenyameko abantwana bakho abayifunayo. (Filipi 1:10, 11) Okwesibini, hlolisisa ubomi bakho. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba kuya kufuneka ubekele bucala izinto oqhele ukuzenza kunye nezinto ezingeyomfuneko kangako.

Yintoni eyona nto ibalulekileyo ebomini bakho? Ngaba kukuba nento yonke ngexesha elinye, okanye ngaba ezinye izinto ozimisele ukuzenza unokuzibekela bucala okwethutyana ngoxa usenza ezinye? UCarolyn, umama owamkela imali encinane, usixelela ngendlela akwazi ngayo ukujamelana nemeko yakhe, uthi: “Ndenza izinto zibe lula ndize ndinciphise iindleko.” UGloria, umama onabantwana abathathu, ukhumbula oku: “Sasingenayo imali yokuthenga iimpahla zexabiso ezisefashonini, kodwa ndandizenza ngokwam iimpahla zabantwana bam, yaye ndandidla ngokubaxelela ukuba zezona zikhethekileyo kuba akakho omnye umntu onazo.”

ILizwi likaThixo lithi umntu “olinda ukuqonda uya kufumana okulungileyo.” (IMizekeliso 19:8) Kufuneka ukuqonda ukuze kukhethwe phakathi kwezinto zokuzonwabisa ezingapheliyo, izixhobo ze-elektroniki kunye nefashoni edida oomama nabantwana. UJudith, umama waseMzantsi Afrika, wakhuza wathi: “Sisoloko sixhinkxwa ngezinto ezintsha, ubugcisa obubhetele kunye neenkonzo ezongezelelekileyo!” Le yindlela uAngela, umama waseJamani onabantwana abane, ajamelana ngayo nolo celomngeni, uthi: “Ufanele ukwazi oko kuyimfuneko noko kubalulekileyo kuwe, uze uncede abantwana bakho benjenjalo nabo.”

❖ Yenza utshintsho olusengqiqweni: IBhayibhile ikhuthaza ngelithi: “Londoloza ubulumko bobuqili namandla okucinga.” (IMizekeliso 3:21) Ukuba ngoku usebenza ngaphandle kwekhaya, ngaba intsapho yakho iza kukwazi ukuphila ngomvuzo womyeni wakho kuphela? Ukuze ukwazi ukuphendula loo mbuzo, hlolisisa imali oyifumanayo emva kokuba kuthatyathwe irhafu, imali yokunyamekela abantwana, iindleko zokuhamba, zempahla yokunxiba, zokutya kwiivenkile zokutya nezinye iindleko. Kwakhona, kunokuthatyathwa irhafu eninzi emvuzweni womyeni wakho ukuba umvuzo wenu wenza ukuba nibe kuluhlu lwabantu abamkela imali eninzi. Uya kumangaliswa kukubona ukuba incinane kangakanani imali esalayo.

Bambi basebenza iiyure ezimbalwa okanye basebenze kufuphi nekhaya, nto leyo enokubangela ukuba bamkele imali encinane kodwa babe nexesha elingakumbi nabantwana. Ukuba ugqiba kwelokuba uyeke ukusebenza yaye ukuba umsebenzi wakho ubalulekile yaye ukwenza uzive uxabisekile yaye wanelisekile, cinga ngendlela eya kukwenza uhlale uvakalelwa ngaloo ndlela ngoxa uhlala ekhaya.

❖ Funa uncedo: Ngokuphindaphindiweyo iLizwi likaThixo lithi ‘ukukhalela uncedo’ kunokuba nemiphumo emihle. (Eksodus 2:23, 24; INdumiso 34:15) Xa umama efuna uncedo, umyeni wakhe ufanele amncede. Ngokusebenzisana naye ngaloo ndlela unokukwazi ukuqalisa indlela eniya kuncedisana ngayo ngomsebenzi wasendlwini ukuze nikwazi ukufikelela usukelo enizibekele lona—njengokusoloko nifumaneka xa abantwana benu benifuna. Ukuba kunokwenzeka, umama umele afumane uncedo nokhuthazo nakwabanye, kuquka intsapho kunye nabahlobo abanokuthenjwa, abaneenjongo nabathanda izinto ezifanayo nezakhe.

Oomama abaninzi bafumana uncedo olusengqiqweni kwibandla lasekuhlaleni lamaKristu aneenkolelo ezifanayo nezabo. UMaría, umama wabantwana abathathu, wafumanisa ukuba “ukusondelelana nebandla” yenye yeendlela “uThixo asibonisa ngayo uthando novelwano yaye asibonisa ngayo ukuba usikhathalele.”

❖ Zinike ixesha lokuphumla: KwanoYesu, indoda egqibeleleyo eyayingethi mandla, wamema abafundi bakhe ukuba baye kwindawo ‘engasese baze baphumle kancinane.’ (Marko 6:30-32) Ukuphumelela kwakho njengomama kuxhomekeke kwindlela okwazi ngayo ukuhlala ulungelelene ngamaxesha obunzima. Liyinyaniso elokuba abantwana bakho bafuna uncedo lwakho, kodwa kwangaxeshanye bafuna ukuba wonwabe uze waneliseke. Kufuneka uphumle ngokwaneleyo.

UAngela, okhankanywe ngaphambilana, unendlela aphumla ngayo, uthi: “Ndibekela bucala ixesha elizolileyo kusasa. Ubuncinane ndiphumla isiqingatha seyure. Yaye kanye okanye kabini ngeveki ngokuhlwa, mna nomyeni wam siya kwindawo ethile ezolileyo kwalapha endlwini size siphumle kungekho nto isiphazamisayo. Ngaloo ndlela siyakwazi ukuchitha iyure sikunye.”

❖ Beka izinto zokomoya kwindawo yokuqala: Kuye kwafunyaniswa ukuba ucelomngeni lokuba ngumama lwenziwa nzima ngakumbi kukungabi nanjongo ebomini nokungabi nanto iza kuqala ebomini. Iintsapho zamaKristu ziyonwaba xa zisebenzisana ekubekeni ukuthanda kukaThixo kwindawo yokuqala ebomini bazo. Umpostile uPawulos wabhala: “Uzinikelo lobuthixo luyingenelo kuzo zonke izinto, njengoko lusinika ithemba kobu bomi nakobo buzayo.” (1 Timoti 4:8) Intsapho ephila ngozinikelo lobuthixo yaye elandela ulwalathiso lukaThixo oluseBhayibhileni iya konwaba. Kwanokuba linye kuphela ilungu lentsapho elithobela imigaqo yeBhayibhile, kuba bhetele kunokuba kungabikho nelinye elenjenjalo.

UAdele, umama ongumKristu owenza umsebenzi osisigxina, uye wazibona iingenelo zokubeka izinto zokomoya kwindawo yokuqala. Uthi: “Sinolwalathiso nenkcazelo eninzi ekwiimpapasho ezisekelwe eBhayibhileni ezisifundisa ngoko abantwana bethu bajamelana nako nendlela esinokubanceda ngayo. Ukubona abantwana bakho belandela oko ubondla ngako ngokomoya kwenza ukuba ukwenjenjalo kuvuyise. Xa ubona izinto ezincinane, ezakhayo kwindlela abaziphethe ngayo nendlela abaqiqa ngayo, uyabona ukuba bayayiva baze bayamkele ingqeqesho yakho yaye umzamo wakho awulolize.”a

Ewe, unokulubaleka ngempumelelo ugqatso olunamahla-ndinyuka lokuba ngumama. UThixo unikela isiqinisekiso esithuthuzelayo sokuba imizamo nokukhuthala koomama abazincamayo abathembele kuye ayiyi kuba lilize. Oomama abahlakulela ubuhlobo naye banokuthuthuzelwa sisithembiso sakhe sokuba ‘unika amandla odiniweyo.’—Isaya 40:29.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 10]

Impembelelo Kamama

Ngamany’ amaxesha, njengomama usenokuthandabuza enoba unalo kusini na igalelo kubomi bomntwana wakho. Maxa wambi, impembelelo yoontanga, abafundisi-ntsapho, ezolonwabo, imidlalo yevidiyo kunye nomculo inokubonakala iyodlula eyakho.

Khawucinge nje ngomzekelo kaYokebhede, umama kaMoses. Wayephila kumaxesha anzima kakhulu yaye wayengenagunya lingako ngoko kwenzeka ebomini bonyana wakhe. Sekunjalo, wasebenzisa onke amathuba ayekho ukuze aphembelele ukukhula konyana wakhe. Okokuqala, waba nokholo olwalufuna inkalipho ngokungavumi ukuba uMoses abulawe. UThixo waluvuza ukholo lwakhe, kungekhona nje ngokulondoloza ubomi bosana kuphela kodwa kwanangokwenza ukuba uYokebhede abe yimpelesi—nonina walo.—Eksodus 1:15, 16; 2:1-10.

Kuyabonakala ukuba uYokebhede waba nempembelelo kuhlobo lomntu unyana wakhe awaba lulo. Isibakala sokuba uMoses okhulileyo abe nothando ngamaHebhere noThixo wawo phezu kwako nje ukuba nento yokwenza kwakhe nobukhosi baseYiputa ibonisa ukuba abazali bakhe baba nempembelelo kuye ngoxa wayekhula.—Hebhere 11:24-26.

Njengomama, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ungoyena unamathuba amaninzi okuba nempembelelo kumntwana wakho kunokuba kwakunjalo ngoYokebhede. Ngaba usebenzisa eli thuba lifutshane laxa umntwana wakho esemncinane ukuze umqeqeshe ngendlela yobuthixo angasokuze ayilibale? Okanye ngaba uvumela iinkolelo ezixhaphakileyo ukuba zibe zezona zinempembelelo ekukhuleni komntwana wakho?

[Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 10]

Bandakanya abanye kumsebenzi wasendlwini, zibekele ixesha lokwenza izinto zobuqu, yaye beka izinto zokomoya kwindawo yokuqala