Oogqirha Baxinezelekile

“Kwafika isibini esiselula sinethemba lokuba ndiza kulunceda usana lwaso. Njengoko ndiluxilonga lwangongoza uvalo. Isigulo salo sasinganyangeki. Ngaba unokuyiqonda indlela endandivakalelwa ngayo njengoko ndixelela aba bazali baselula ukuba unyana wabo wayeza kuba yimfama? Njengoko ndibakhulula eofisini, ndandingazi nokuba ndithini kukudandatheka. Kodwa emva kwabo kwakumele kungene esinye isigulana silindele ukwamkelwa ngovuyo. Yiloo nto endenza ndixinezeleke.”—Ingcali yotyando lwamehlo eMzantsi Merika.

NGOKUQHELEKILEYO izigulana aziyi kwagqirha kuba zifuna ukuqonda iingxaki zoogqirha. Ziya kuba zifuna uncedo. Ngoko, bambalwa abantu abayiqondayo indlela abaxinezeleka ngayo oogqirha.

Kakade ke, wonk’ umntu uxinezelekile, yaye asingomsebenzi woogqirha kuphela obangela uxinezeleko. Noko ke, ekubeni wonk’ umntu esiya kugqirha ngandlel’ ithile xa egula, kuhle ukuqonda indlela abaxinezeleka ngayo oogqirha nemiphumo yoko.

Oogqirha baqala ukuxinezeleka beselula ngoxa besafundela ubugqirha. Xa besaqala ukuqeqeshwa, badla ngokudibana nezinto ezibothusa de bangazilibali. Kweso siqalo kudla ngokwenzeka izinto ezinokuguqula iimvakalelo zomntu ofundela ubugqirha, ziguqule nobuntu bakhe.

Amava Othusayo Xa Uqeqeshelwa Ubugqirha

Utyelelo olothusayo lokuqala kwigumbi loqhaqho lunokwenziwa kwakwiveki yokuqala yezifundo zobugqirha. Abafundi abaninzi basenokuba abazange basibone isidumbu ngaphambili. Ukubona izidumbu ezinganxityiswanga, ezishwabeneyo nezingafaniyo ziqhaqhwa ukuze nifundiswe kunokuba yinto eyenyanyekayo. Abafundi kufuneka bafunde ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo. Badla ngokubhenela ekwenzeni uburharha, ufike besenza intlekisa ngokuthiya isidumbu ngasinye igama elithile. Oko kanye kubonakala njengokungabi nazimvakalelo nantlonelo komnye umntu, koko kufunekayo kwaba bafundi bazama ukungacingi ngomnini-mzimba lowo.

Emva koku baqeqeshelwa ukuxilonga izigulana esibhedlele. Abantu abaninzi abananto ibanyanzela ukuba bacingisise nzulu ngokuba bufutshane kobomi de bafike kwiminyaka engama-40 nangaphezulu. Kodwa abo bafundela ubugqirha bajamelana nabantu abanezifo ezinganyangekiyo nabafayo beselula. Echaza amava akhe okuqala esibhedlele omnye uthi, “kwakusenyanyeka gqitha oko kwakusenzeka.” Kumazwe afumileyo nahlwempuzekileyo abafundi banokothuswa kukubona izigulana ezininzi zibandezwa unyango kuba nje zingenazo iinkozo zokuhlawula.

Oogqirha abatsha bakwazi njani ukujamelana noxinezeleko? Badla ngokukuphepha ukucinga ngezigulana becinezela iimvakalelo zabo bazenze abangakhathaliyo. Kunokubhekisela emntwini ofuna uncedo basuka nje bathi, “Gqirha, kukho umlenze owaphukileyo kwigumbi lesibini.” Oku kunokuvakala ngathi benza intlekisa xa ungasiqondi isizathu soko.

Ukukruquka Ngenxa Yosizi

Oogqirha baqeqeshwa njengezazinzulu, kodwa kwabaninzi umsebenzi omkhulu kukuthetha nezigulana. Abanye baziva bengakulungelanga ukunyamezela indlela abavakalelwa ngayo xa bekunye nezigulana. Njengokuba kuchaziwe ekuqaleni, eyona nto ibuhlungu kugqirha kukuphalaza iindaba ezibuhlungu. Abanye bakwenza mihla le oku. Abantu abasengxakini basoloko befuna ukuphalaza intlungu yabo, ngoxa belindele ukuba ugqirha aphulaphule. Ukuqhubana nabantu abanxungupheleyo nabaxhalabileyo kunokukuqoba amandla kangangokuba abanye oogqirha banengxaki yokukruquka okubangelwa kukuba nosizi.

Ekhumbula iminyaka yakhe yokuqala, omnye ugqirha owayenyamekela intsapho eKhanada wathi: “Umsebenzi wawundongamela: abantu befuna uncedo; abaxinezelekileyo befuna ukothulwa umthwalo; abagulayo befuna ukunyangwa; abanye benyanzelisa; abanye babesiza kum; abanye bendicenga befuna ndiye kubo; abanye bendifowunela ekhaya—kwanokuba ndilele. Ngalo lonk’ ixesha ngabantu. Ndandifuna ukunceda, kodwa imeko ingaphaya kwamandla.”—IDoctor’s Dilemma, kaJohn W. Holland.

Ngaba uxinezeleko luyaphela xa usiba mdala? Ukuba mdala kudla ngokuzisa imbopheleleko engakumbi. Kudla ngokufuneka kwenziwe izigqibo ezibalulekileyo ezingxamisekileyo, kube kungekho nkcazelo yaneleyo. Ugqirha waseBritani uthi: “Ngoxa ndandiselula kwakungekho nto indikhathazayo koko, njengokuba kunjalo ngolutsha oluqhuba ukuthanda kwalo endleleni. Kodwa xa ukhula uya ubuxabisa ngakumbi ubomi. Ngoku ukwenza izigqibo zonyango kuya kundixhalabisa ngakumbi.”

Uxinezeleko lubachaphazela njani oogqirha? Ukuzama kwabo ukulibala ngezigulana kunokuchaphazela neentsapho zabo. Kunokuba nzima gqitha ukulwa naloo ngxaki. Abanye oogqirha babalasele ngovelwano xa benceda izigulana. Kodwa banokukwenza ixesha elingakanani oko bengakhange bakruquke ngenxa yolo velwano? Le yingxaki abanayo oogqirha.

Ukunyamezela Izigulana Ezinenkathazo

Xa bebuzwa ngezinto ezibacinezelayo kumsebenzi wabo oogqirha, basoloko beqala ngokukhankanya izigulana ezinenkathazo. Mhlawumbi uyaziqonda ezinye zazo kwezi zilandelayo.

Kuqala, kukho isigulana esichitha ixesha likagqirha sithetha into eninzi singayichazi eyona nto sigula yiyo. Esinye, siyanyanzelisa simfowunela ebusuku okanye ngeempelaveki kungekho nto ixhomis’ amehlo okanye sifuna unyango angaluncomeliyo ugqirha. Kwakhona kukho isigulana esingamthembiyo. Abanye abantu benza uphando ngezigulo zabo befuna inkcazelo eluncedo, mhlawumbi kwi-Internet yaye oku kunokuba luncedo. Kodwa olo phando lunokwenza bayeke ukuthemba oogqirha babo. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba ugqirha akakabi nalo ithuba lokuxubusha ngoncedo neengozi zoko akufumanise kolo phando. Imkhathaza gqitha ugqirha into yokungathotyelwa sisigulana kuba singamthembi. Esokugqibela, sisigulana esingakwaziyo ukulinda. Sisuka siyeke ukusebenzisa amayeza ngaphambi kokuba asebenze, mhlawumbi sisuka siye kufuna uncedo kwenye indawo.

Noko ke, kwamanye amazwe eyona nto ibangela uxinezeleko koogqirha ayizozigulana kodwa ngamagqwetha.

Ukunyanga Ucinga Ngokuzikhusela

Amazwe amaninzi athi liyanda inani loogqirha abamangalelwa ngenxa yeempazamo kumsebenzi wabo. Amanye amagqwetha enza izimangalo ezingekho ngqiqweni ngenjongo yokufumana imali. Umongameli weAmerican Medical Association wathi: “Ezi zimangalo zenze ii-inshorensi zoogqirha zenyuka gqitha. Ziphinda zibangele ezinye iintlungu. Kaloku xa ugqirha emangalelwa ngento engekhoyo oko kunokumenzakalisa gqitha—uyadana, aphulukane nexesha, . . . axinezeleke aze axhalabe.” Abanye bade bazibulale ngenxa yoku.

Ngenxa yoku, abaninzi baziva benyanzelekile ukuba xa “benyanga bacinge ngokuzikhusela,” benze izigqibo abaya kukwazi ukuzithethelela ngazo enkundleni kunokuba bajonge oko kufanele isigulana. IPhysician’s News Digest yathi, “xa benyanga abantu ngoku oogqirha basebenzisa indlela eya kwenza bakwazi ukuzithethelela.”

Njengoko lusanda uxinezeleko koogqirha, abaninzi bazibuza ngekamva labo. Izigulana ezininzi zizibuza umbuzo, ofanayo njengoko zibona besanda abantu ababandezeleka zizifo phezu kwayo nje inkqubela kwinzululwazi yezonyango. Inqaku elilandelayo liza kuxubusha ngembono yokwenene yekamva loogqirha nezigulana.

[Ibhokisi/Umfanekiso okwiphepha 20]

UKUSEBENZISANA NOGQIRHA

1. Lisebenzise kakuhle ixesha lokudibana nogqirha ngokuyicingisisa kusengaphambili indlela elula oza kumcacisela ngayo ingxaki yakho, uqale ngeyona nto ikuxhalabisayo

2. Kuphephe ukufowunela ugqirha ngexesha angekho msebenzini ngalo kube kungekho nto ixhomis’amehlo

3. Yiba nomonde. Kuthabatha ixesha ngaphambi kokuyichana eyona nto agula yiyo umntu nonyango amele alusebenzise

[Ibhokisi/Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 21]

‘NEZINTO ZEMIHLA NGEMIHLA ZINOKUKWANELISA’

“Mkhulu gqitha umahluko phakathi koogqirha balapha nabo bamazwe afumileyo. Apha ukufundela umsebenzi othile kugqalwa njengendlela yokuphuma ebuhlwempini, ngoko baninzi abantu abafundela ubugqirha. Baninzi oogqirha ngoxa unqabile umsebenzi wabo. Ngoko, oogqirha bafumana umvuzo omncinane gqitha. Bambalwa abantu abanemali yokuhlawula oogqirha babucala. Ndixelengela kwixhobongwana elidala lesibhedlele esinophahla oluvuzayo nezixhobo nje ezingatshongo khona. Kukho oogqirha ababini nabongikazi abahlanu. Sinyamekela abantu abali-14 000.

“Maxa wambi izigulana zivakalelwa kukuba andizixilongi kakuhle, kodwa xa ulindelwe zizigulana ezingama-25, awunakukwazi ukuchitha ixesha elide uthetha nazo. Sekunjalo, ukunyanga izigulana kundishiya ndaneliseke gqitha, nditsho nokuba ezo zizinto endizenza rhoqo. Ngokomzekelo, oomama badla ngokuzisa abantwana abangondlekanga, abangafumani manzi aneleyo emzimbeni ngenxa yokuhambisa kwesisu. Baba namehlo arhoxileyo nobuso obuthe khunubembe. Ndisuka ndixelele unina indlela yokusebenzisa ityuwa eza kuphelisa olo tyatyazo, iyeza leentshulube nezibulala-zintsholongwane. Athi akusebenza la mayeza, umntwana aqale ukutya kwakhona. Kwiveki kamva uphinde aswabuluke abe mhle—atsho ngamehlo aqaqambileyo, uncumo aze adlamke. Ngenxa yovuyo olubangelwa zezi zinto ndiyakunandipha ukuba ngugqirha.

“Kwasebuntwaneni, ndandilangazelela ukunceda abantu abagulayo. Kodwa uqeqesho lobugqirha lwanditshintsha ngendlela endingazange ndiyicinge. Ndiye ndabona abantu besifa kuba bengenayo imali yokuhlawulela unyango olufunekayo. Kwakufuneka ndizenze ongakhathaliyo ukuze ndingahlali ndidandatheka koko. Kuxa ndaboniswa eBhayibhileni isizathu sokubandezeleka kwabantu kuphela apho ndaqonda khona uvelwano lukaThixo ndaza ndaphinda ndakwazi ukuba nosizi ngabanye abantu. Ndaphinda ndakwazi ukukhala.”

[Imifanekiso]

UGqr. Marco Villegas usebenza kwidolophu ekwanti yaseAmazonia, eBolivia