Uqeqesho Luvelisa Isiqhamo Soxolo
“Lonke ke uqeqesho okunene ngokwakalokunje alubonakali luluvuyo, lubonakala luyintlungu; kodwa kamva lubanika isiqhamo esiluxolo, oko kukuthi sobulungisa, abo baqhelisiweyo lulo.”—HEBHERE 12:11.
1. (a) Lithini iLizwi likaYehova ngobuchule bomntu bokwalathisa ikhondo lobomi bakhe, ibe uthini yena umntu? (b) Ngubani oye wangqinwa enyanisile, ibe ngoobani abaye bangqinwa bexoka?
ILIZWI likaYehova lithi “akukhona endodeni ehambayo ukuqinisela ukunyathela kwayo.” (Yeremiya 10:23) Umntu uthi unokuyalathisa indlela ahamba ngayo, ibe ukususela ekuvukeleni kwakhe e-Eden, uye wenjenjalo. Ukususela ngoko ukuza kuthi ga ngoku, ebantwini abaninzi kube njengokuba kwakunjalo ngemihla yaBagwebi bakwaSirayeli: “Elowo wenza ngokubona kwakhe.” (ABagwebi 21:25) Kodwa amazwi kaYehova akwiMizekeliso 14:12 aye angqineka eyinyaniso: “Kukho indlela ethe tye phambi komntu, ukanti ukuphela kwayo ziindlela zokufa.” Kangangeminyaka engama-6 000, abantu baye bahamba ngendlela ebibonakala ilungile kubo, ibe ngalo lonke elo xesha iye yabakhokelela emfazweni, kwindlala, ekuguleni, kulwaphulo-mthetho nasekufeni. Imbali iye yawangqina eyinyaniso amazwi kaYehova yaza yazingqina zibubuxoki iindlela zomntu.
2. Siyintoni isimo sengqondo sezazingqondo zabantwana ngokubethwa kwabo, kodwa siyintoni isiqhamo esibangelwe kukuyekelela kwabo?
2 Abantu abangafezekanga bayalufuna uqeqesho. Balufuna ukususela ebuntwaneni ukubhekisa phambili. ILizwi likaThixo lithi: “Oyiyekileyo intonga yakhe umthiyile unyana wakhe; ke omthandayo umqeqesha esemncinane.” (IMizekeliso 13:24) Izazi ngengqondo ezininzi nezihlolisisa abantwana ziyaphikisana nobu bulumko bukaThixo. Kwiminyaka eyadlulayo omnye wazo wabuza lo mbuzo: “Nina boomama niyaqonda na ukuba ngalo lonke ixesha nibetha umntwana wenu nibonisa ukuba nimthiyile?” Kanti umoya wabo kavula-zibhuqe wabangela ukwanda kwabantwana abaziinjubaqa kangangokuba umgwebi wenkundla yaseBrooklyn wavakalisa la mazwi: “Ndiyacinga ukuba abanye abantwana kufuneka babethwe. Kodwa oko akugqalwa njengento eqhelekileyo ngoku. Ngoku sixelelwa ukuba singababethi abantwana; kusenokwenzeka ukuba umenza angabi yongqondi.” Kodwa ukuyekelela kwabo akuvelisanga ngqondi zininzi—kodwa kuvelise iliza lokuchaswa komthetho zizaphuli-mthetho ezikwishumi elivisayo.
3. Luluphi utyekelo oluya lubonakala njengoko lusekelwe kumazwi avakaliswe ngamagosa athile aliqela?
3 Ngoku abantu baguqula isimo sengqondo sabo. UBurton L. White, ongomnye wabaphambili ekukhulisweni kwabantwana, uthi ubungqongqo bakho abuyi kubangela umntwana wakho ukuba “angakuthandi kunokuba ebeya kwenjenjalo ukuba ubungambethi. . . . Nditsho nokuba ubabetha rhoqo, uya kufumanisa ukuba basoloko bebuyela kuwe.” Ubethelela ukuba umntwana ulufuna kakhulu “uthando olumfamekileyo.” UGqr. Joyce Brothers wanikela le ngxelo kuhlolisiso olwenziwa kumakhulukhulu abantwana abaqeqeshwa ngokungqongqo nabafunda kwibanga lesixhenxe nelesibhozo ababekholelwa kwelokuba imithetho engqongqo “yayibonakalisa ukuba abazali babo bayabathanda.” IJournal of Lifetime Living yathi: “Izazingqondo zabantwana, eziphikisana ngokondliwa kwabantwana okucwangcisiweyo nokwenziwa ngesinyanzelo, ukubethwa kwabo nokungabethwa kwabo, ziye zafumanisa ukuba akukho nanye kwezi zinto ebangela umahluko omkhulu lo gama nje umntwana ethandwa.” KwanoGqr. Benjamin Spock, umbhali wencwadi ethi Baby and Child Care, ngokuyinxenye ubekek’ ityala ngokungaqini kwabazali ekuqeqesheni nobunjubaqa obungumphumo woko. Wathi iingcaphephe zibekek’ ityala, “oogqirha bengqondo yabantwana, izazingqondo, abefundisi-ntsapho, oonontlalo-ntle noogqirha babantwana njengam lo.”
Intonga Yoqeqesho
4. Intonga yoqeqesho imela ntoni, ibe yintoni ethi ibonakale xa isetyenziswa ngokufanelekileyo ngokuchasene nomoya kavula-zibhuqe?
4 Igama elithi “intonga” njengoko lisetyenziswe ngasentla ngokuyimfuneko alithethi ukubetha; linentsingiselo yokululeka, nangayiphi na indlela esenokufuneka. IThe New International Version ithi ngale ndinyana: “Intonga. Mhlawumbi sisafobe esibhekisela kulo naluphi na uhlobo loqeqesho.” Intonga imela umthetho okanye igunya—kule meko igunya labazali. Umzali akafumani lizwi lambulelo kamva ngenxa yokuyekelela nokonakalisa kwakhe: “Osifekethisayo kwasebuncinaneni isicaka sakhe [okanye umntwana wakhe] uya kwenelwa lukhula ekupheleni.” (IMizekeliso 29:21) Ukulahla igunya lobuzali ngokuthi uyekelele kuzisa ihlazo ibe akubonisi luthando kodwa kubonisa ukungakhathali; ukusebenzisa intonga yoqeqesho ngobubele kodwa ngokuqinileyo kubonakalisa inkxalabo enothando. “Intonga nesohlwayo sinika ubulumko; ke yena umntwana oyekelelweyo udanisa unina.”—IMizekeliso 29:15.
5. (a) Ithini enye incwadi ngeMizekeliso 13:24, ibe oko kuvumelana nasiphi esinye isibhalo seBhayibhile? (b) Ngoobani abaqeqeshwa nguYesu nanguYehova?
5 Ibhekisela kwiMizekeliso 13:24, iCommentary on the Old Testament kaKeil-Delitzsch icacisa ngokuthi: “Uyise ofuna ngokwenene ukuba unyana wakhe aphile kakuhle kwasebusaneni umgcina ephantsi koqeqesho olungqongqo, uyamqeqesha ngoxa enokuphembeleleka lula kwikhondo elifanelekileyo, ibe iziphoso akazivumeli ukuba zendele kuye; kodwa lowo umyekayo umntwana wakhe xa kufanele abe ngqongqo kuye, wenza ngokungathi ngenene umnqwenelela ukuba abhubhe.” INew Translation of the Bible kaMoffatt kwiMizekeliso 19:18 ithi: “Mqeqeshe unyana wakho, ngoxa kusekho ithemba ngaye, ibe musa ukumvumela ukuba agidimele embubhisweni.” Uqeqesho olunobubele noluphunyezwa ngokuqinileyo olususela kwasebuntwaneni lubonakalisa uthando lobuzali. UYesu wathi: “Mna, bonke endibathandayo ndiyabohlwaya, ndibaqeqeshe.” NoYehova uvakalisa oku, “Lowo imthandayo iNkosi iyamqeqesha.”—ISityhilelo 3:19; Hebhere 12:6.
6. Ngokufuthi uqeqesho luza ngaluphi uhlobo, ibe yiyiphi imizekelo exhasa impendulo yakho?
6 Maxa wambi uqeqesho lusenokuquka ukubetha, kodwa ngokufuthi akunjalo. IMizekeliso 8:33 ayithi, “yiba nemvakalelo” yoqeqesho kodwa ithi, “yivani uqeqesho, nibe nobulumko.” Ngamaxesha amaninzi uqeqesho luza lungamazwi, kungasetyenziswa ntonga: “Ziyindlela yobomi izohlwayo eziqeqeshayo.” “Bambelela eluqeqeshweni, musa ukuluyekela; lulondoloze, ngokuba lububomi bakho.” (IMizekeliso 4:13; 6:23) Xa umkhonzi kaYehova onguYobhi kwakufuneka eqeqeshiwe, oko kwaphunyezwa ngamazwi asisiluleko, okokuqala nguElihu kwaza kwalandela uYehova ngokwakhe. (uYobhi, isahluko 32-41) UYobhi wasamkela eso siluleko waza wathi kuYehova: “Ndiyazicekisa, ndizohlwaye, ndiseluthulini naseluthuthwini.”—Yobhi 42:6.
7. lyintoni intsingiselo yegama lesiGrike eliguqulelwe ngokuthi “uqeqesho,” yaye lumele luphunyezwe njani, ibe yintoni oluyifezayo?
7 Igama lesiGrike eliguqulelwe ngokuthi “uqeqesho” lelithi pai·deiʹa. Ngokweentsingiselo zalo ezahlukahlukeneyo lithetha ukuyala, ukufundisa, ‘ukuqeqesha ngobulali.’ (2 Timoti 2:25) Lihlobene ngakumbi nokuqeqesha ngokokuziphatha kunokuqeqeshelwa ukuzuza ulwazi. Olu qeqesho lumele luphunyezwe ‘ngako konke ukuzeka kade umsindo, nokufundisa.’ (2 Timoti 4:2) Luboniswa kakuhle kwisiluleko esibhekiswa koobawo: “Nani boyise, musani ukubacaphukisa abantwana benu; bondleleni ekuqeqesheni nasekululekeni kweNkosi.” (Efese 6:4) Ngobubele kodwa ngokungqongqo, olu qeqesho lumele lwenze oselula ahambe ngokwendlela uYehova acinga ngayo.
Umthombo Woqeqesho
8. Sinokuziqeqesha ngokuphuma kuwuphi umthombo ibe ngaziphi iindlela?
8 Imigaqo ebandakanyekileyo ekuqeqesheni abantwana ikwasebenza nakubantu abakhulu. IBhayibhile ingumthombo wenkcazelo esifumana kuwo oko simele sibe kuko noko simele singabi kuko. Njengoko siyifunda, sinokuzicikida size silungise apho kufuneka silungise khona. (2 Korinte 13:5) Njengoko sicamngca ngemithetho kaYehova, sisenokuba neemvakalelo zokuba netyala, ezisinceda sibone apho kufuneka senze iinguqulelo khona. Kwakunjalo kumdumisi: “Ndiya kumbonga uYehova ondinike icebo; nasebusuku ziyandithethisa izintso zam [“ezona mvakalelo zam zinzulu”].” (INdumiso 16:7) Sisenokuziqeqesha njengoko uPawulos wenzayo: “Ndisuka ndiwuqobe umzimba wam, ndiwuxinzelele phantsi, hleze ndithi, ndakuba ndizivakalisile iindaba ezilungileyo kwabanye, ndibe mna ndingumlahlelwa phandle.”—1 Korinte 9:27.
9. Ziziphi ezinye iindlela ezikhoyo zokusinceda sifumane uqeqesho olunengenelo?
9 Uqeqesho sinokulufumana luvela komnye umntu. Usenokulufumana ngokuthi ujongwe nje, ngokuthi ufingelwe iintshiya, ngelizwi, ngesimbo somzimba, nanjengesiluleko esiphuma emlonyeni. UYesu wasuka wajonga uPetros kwaza oko kwamkhumbuza ngokuchazwa kwangaphambili kwesono sakhe esinzulu, ibe emva koko waphuma waza wakhala ngokukrakra. (Luka 22:61, 62) Ngelinye ixesha uPetros wakhalinyeIwa ngamagama nje amahlanu: “Suka uye emva kwam, Sathana.” (Mateyu 16:23) Ukufunda iimpapasho zeWatch Tower, ukuya ezintlanganisweni, ukuncokola nabanye nokunyamezela amava abuhlungu—zonke izinto ezinjalo zinokuwavula amehlo ethu ukuze sibone iindawo ekufuneka senze iinguqulelo kuzo. Noko ke, umthombo nokhokelo olulolona lubalulekileyo lokusiqeqesha liLizwi likaThixo ngokwalo.—INdumiso 119:105.
10. Ixabiseke kangakanani imizekeliso kaSolomon ethetha ngoqeqesho, kanti liliphi ikhondo abathile abazingisayo ekulilandeleni?
10 Imizekeliso eyabhalwa nguSolomon yayibhalelwe abantu abakubudala obahlukahlukeneyo, ukuze ‘bazi ubulumko noqeqesho; ukuze baqonde intetho yengqondo; ukuze bamkele uqeqesho lwengqiqo, ubulungisa, nesiko, nokuthe tye; ukuze izidenge zinikwe ubuqili, ulutsha lunikwe ukwazi nokunkqangiyela.’ Kodwa mhlawumbi umntu ‘akayi kuzivumela aqeqeshwe ngamazwi; kuba eqonda, engakhathali.’ (IMizekeliso 1:2-4; 29:19) Bambi abangenamava batyhala ngesifuba befuna ukuzifunda ngamava abuhlungu izinto zobomi, njengoko wenjenjalo unyana wolahleko ngaphambi kokuba ‘aqonde.’—Luka 15:11-17.
11. (a) Ibandla laseKorinte noYona baqeqeshwa njani? (b) Ziziphi izohlwayo zoqeqesho ezafunyanwa nguDavide ngenxa yokukrexexa nemizamo yakhe yokufihla oko? (c) Ngawaphi amazwi eNdumiso 51 awabhalwa nguDavide abonisa ubunzulu benguquko yakhe?
11 Ethetha ngencwadi ngaphambili awayeyibhalele ibandla lamaKristu laseKorinte, uPawulos wathi: ‘Nenziwa buhlungu ngokwasinga enguqukweni; kuba nenziwa buhlungu ngokokukaThixo, [ibe oku kwaphumela ekubeni] niphindezele [nilungise okuphosakeleyo, NW].’ (2 Korinte 7:9-11) UYona waqeqeshwa ngokusetyenziswa koqhwithela lwaselwandle nentlanzi enkulu. (Yona 1:2, 3, 12, 17; 2:10; 3:1-4) Ukukrexeza kukaDavide namalinge akhe okukufihla oko kwezisa izohlwayo ezamqeqeshayo, njengoko kuboniswe kweyesi-2 kaSamuweli 12:9-14. Inguquko yakhe yavakaliswa ngendlela eshukumisayo kula mazwi asusela kwiNdumiso yama-51: ‘Ndixovule busuke ubugwenxa bam, ndihlambulule esonweni sam. Isono sam siphambi kwam ngamaxesha onke. Bugcine bonke ubugwenxa bam, udale ngaphakathi kwam, intliziyo ehlambulukileyo, uhlaziye umoya wam. Musa ukundilahla ebusweni bakho. Intliziyo eyaphukileyo, etyumkileyo, Thixo,akuyi kuyidela.’—INdumiso 51: 2, 3, 9-11, 17.
12. Ngawaphi amanyathelo aqatha ngakumbi ekufuneka ethatyathiwe ngabathile, ibe uyintoni umphumo kwabo bazichasayo izohlwayo eziphindaphindiweyo?
12 Kubantu abathile kusenokufuneka amanyathelo aqatha ngakumbi, njengoko IMizekeliso 26:3 ibonisa ngokuthi: “Iziniya yeyehashe, umkhala ngowe-esile, intonga yeyomhlana wesinyabi.” Ngamanye amaxesha uYehova wayevumela uhlanga lwakhe lukaSirayeli ukuba luntlithwe ziinkathazo olwaluzizisele ngokwalo: “Ngokuba baphikise amazwi kaThixo, belitshitshisa icebo lOsenyangweni: wayithoba intliziyo yabo ngokubasebenzisa kanzima; bakhubeka, akwabakho mncedi. Bakhala ke kuYehova embandezelweni yabo; wabasindisa ekucuthekeni kwabo.” (INdumiso 107:11-13) Noko ke, zimbi izinyabi ziqin’ iintliziyo kangangokuba azinakuncedwa lulo naluphi na uhlobo loqeqesho oluphilisayo: “Indoda eyohlwaywa futhi, iyenze lukhuni intamo yayo, iya kuchithakala ngephanyazo, kungabikho kuncedwa.”—IMizekeliso 29:1.
Ukunikela Nokwamkela Isiluleko
13. Yintoni esimele siyiphephe xa sinikela isiluleko, ibe simele sinikelwe njani?
13 Nokuba lungaphunyezwa njani na uqeqesho, kodwa lumele lungaze lunikelwe ngumntu onomsindo. Enyanisweni, endaweni yokunceda, “indoda enomsindo ixhaya ingxabano.” Kwakhona sinikwa eli cebiso: “Ozeka kade umsindo unengqondo eninzi; ke yena ozekanekayo ucaphula ukumatha.” Ngaphezu koko, “ingqiqo yomntu imenza azeke kade umsindo; sisihombo sakhe ukulugqitha ukreqo.” (IMizekeliso 29:22; 14:29; 19:11) Xa lufuneka, uqeqesho lumele lungaze luphunyezwe ngokugqithiseleyo. Lunikele ngexesha elifanelekileyo nangomlinganiselo ofanelekileyo—ungangxami, ungalibazisi, ungarhwalasi ukanti ungalunikeli ngokulubaxa.
14. Yiyiphi eminye imigaqo yokhokelo enikwa abo banikela isiluleko?
14 Apha kwandlalwe imigaqo yokhokelo ethile yokunceda abo banikela isiluleko: “Indoda enkulu musa ukuyithethisa kabukhali, yiyale njengoyihlo; amancinane, njengabazalwana; abafazi abakhulu, njengoonyoko; abancinane, njengoodade, unobunyulu bonke.” (1 Timoti 5:1, 2) Ngaba ungumntu obongozayo, akungomntu uxabelayo? “Bazalwana, ukuba umntu uthe waqutyulwa nokuqutyulwa sisiphoso esithile, nina ningaboMoya, mlulekeni onjalo ninomoya wobulali; uzilumkela ukuba ungahendwa nawe.” (Galati 6:1) Ngaba siluleka sinobulali, sisoloko siqonda apho sisilela khona? “Zonke izinto ngoko enisukuba ninga bangazenza abantu kuni, yenzani ezikwanjalo nani kubo.” (Mateyu 7:12) Ngaba uzibeka kwindawo yomnye umntu, ubonakalisa uvelwano?
15. Yintoni efunekayo ukuze sisamkele isiluleko, ibe sisiphi isiluleko esongezelelekileyo esinikelwa kwabo bohlwaywayo?
15 Ukufumana isiluleko kufuna ukuba sibe nophawu lokuthobeka. Ngaba sibonakala sikhetha, singafanelekanga yaye singekho sikweni? Musa ukungxama. Khawucinge ngaso. Musa ukuba nesimo sengqondo esibi ngaso. Cinga ngendlela eyakhayo ngaso. Ukuba asinto yonke ebonakala iyefanelekileyo, ngaba ayifanelekanga inxalenye yaso? Yenza ukuba ingqondo yakho isamkele; sihlolisise ngenjongo. Ngaba uvakalelwa msinyane gqitha, ucaphuka ngokukhawuleza gqitha? Kusenokufuna ixesha ukuze usibone ngendlela efanelekileyo, emva kokuba ukukhathazeka okanye ukucaphuka kokuqala sekuphelile. Ngoko khawulinde. Lubambe ulwimi lwakho. Ngokuzolileyo hlolisisa into ethethiweyo. Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuba akuginyi nje lowo unikela isiluleko, yaye usicekisa ngenxa yeso sizathu? Sekunjalo, sibone njengento ebiyenzelwe ukukunceda ungasichasi kwangoko.
16. (a) Ziziphi izibhalo nemibuzo ehlobene nazo esimele siyiqwalasele xa sisamkela isiluleko? (b) Yiyiphi imvakalelo eyabonakaliswa ngumdumisi esimele sibe nayo?
16 Nazi ezinye izibhalo omele ucinge ngazo xa ululekwa: “Owanqandayo amazwi akhe unokwazi: omoya upholileyo yindoda enengqondo.” (IMizekeliso 17:27) Ngaba uyaphulaphula uze uhlale uzolile? “Indlela yesimathane ithe tye kwawaso amehlo; ophulaphula ukucetyiswa usisilumko.” (IMizekeliso 12:15) Ngaba ngokungxama ugqiba kwelokuba nguwe ochanileyo, okanye ngaba uphulaphula ngenyameko? “Makathi umntu wonke enze msinya ukuva, enze kade ukuthetha, enze kade ukuqumba.” (Yakobi 1:19) Ngaba uyawalandela la mazwi xa ululekwa? “Musa ukukungxamela ukuqumba ngomoya wakho, ngokuba ingqumbo ilala esifubeni sezidenge.” (INtshumayeli 7:9) Ngaba ucaphuka msinya? Hayi indlela ekunokuba kuhle ngayo ukuba sivakalelwa ngokwendlela umdumisi awavakalelwa ngayo: “Malindibethe ilungisa linenceba, lindohlwaye; ioli enjalo yentloko ayingeyali intloko yam.”—INdumiso 141:5.
Lunyamezele Uqeqesho Uze Uvune Isiqhamo Soxolo
17. Kutheni le nto kungasoloko kulula ukwamkela uqeqesho, kodwa ukukhumbula amaHebhere 12:7, 11 kuya kusinceda njani ukuba silunyamezele?
17 Ukwamkela uqeqesho akusoloko kulula. Kusenokuthetha ukuphoxeka ngandlel’ ithile nokumiselwa kwemiqathango ethile. Kusenokude kukubangele ube buhlungu. Kodwa kunyamezele konke oku. Kuza kudlula; emva koko kuza kulandela uvuyo. Khumbula oku: “Ukuba ninyamezela uqeqesho, uThixo woba uniphethe njengoonyana; kuba nguwuphi na unyana ongaqeqeshwayo nguyise? Lonke ke uqeqesho okunene ngokwakalokunje alubonakali luluvuyo, lubonakala luyintlungu; kodwa kamva lubanika isiqhamo esiluxolo, oko kukuthi sobulungisa, abo baqhelisiweyo lulo.”—Hebhere 12:7, 11.
18, 19. Ziziphi iimvakalelo ezinamandla ezabonakaliswa nguYeremiya nangumdumisi ezisibonisa ikhondo elifanelekileyo esimele sihambe ngalo xa sifumana uqeqesho?
18 Ngoko ukuba uqeqesho lubuhlungu yaye kunzima ukulunyamezela, lindela isiqhamo esiluxolo esilandela oko. Lindela kuYehova, njengoko wenzayo uYeremiya: “Umphefumlo wam uyazikhumbula unangoku ezo zinto, usibekekile kum. Oko ndikunyamekele ngentliziyo: ngenxa yoko ndilindile.” (IZililo 3:20, 21) Khumbula oko umdumisi wakubhekisa kuye xa wayebandezelekile: “Kungani na ukuba usibekeke, mphefumlo wam; kungani na ukuba ugule ngaphakathi kwam? Lindela kuThixo, ngokuba ndisaya kubuya ndibulele kuye, olusindiso lobuso bam.”—INdumiso 42:5, 11; 43:5.
19 Ngoko ngamnye wethu makalindele kuThixo xa eqeqeshwa. Emva kokuba silungisiwe lulo, siya kufumana isivuno esisisiqhamo soxolo, ubulungisa.
Uyakhumbula Na?
◻ Kuxabiseke kangakanani ukusebenzisa intonga yoqeqesho?
◻ Uyintoni umthombo oyintloko woqeqesho? Yiyiphi eminye imithombo yoqeqesho?
◻ Ukongezelela kumazwi esiluleko, ngawaphi amanyathelo anamandla ngakumbi asenokufuneka?
◻ Yiyiphi imigaqo ethile esikhokelayo ekunikeleni isiluleko?
◻ Liliphi icebiso eliya kusinceda ekwamkeleni isiluleko?
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 17]
Ngaba ‘uluphulaphula ngobulumko uqeqesho’?
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 18]
Imigaqo ebandakanyekileyo ekuqeqesheni abantwana iyasebenza nakubantu abakhulu