Lutsha—Vumelani Abazali Benu Balondoloze Iintliziyo Zenu!
UCINGA ukuba yiyiphi eyona nto inzima kumphathi wenqanawa? Ngaba kukunqumla ulwandlekazi ngokukhuselekileyo? Akusoloko kunjalo. Iinqanawa ezininzi ziye zaphuke kufuphi nonxweme, kungekhona enzulwini yolwandle. Eneneni, ukumisa inqanawa ezibukweni kunokuba yingozi ngaphezu kokumisa inqwelo-moya. Ngoba?
Ngaphambi kokuba umphathi wenqanawa ayimise, ufanele aphephe zonke izinto ezinokuba yingozi ezibukweni. Ufanele azi ngemisinga ephantsi kwamanzi ngoxa ephepha ukungqubana nezinye iinqanawa. Kwakhona ufanele aphephe naziphi na iinduli zesanti, amatye okanye izinto ezingabonakaliyo ngaphantsi kwamanzi ezinokuba yingozi. Enye into esenokuba yingozi ngakumbi kukuba, usenokuba uyaqala ukuza kweli zibuko.
Ukuze oyise ezi ngxaki, umphathi olumkileyo unokucela uncedo kumalathisi (pilot) olazi kakuhle eli zibuko. Lo malathisi uma kufuphi nomphathi aze amalathise ngobuchule. Bobabini baye bajonge iingozi baze inqanawa bayiqhubele ezibukweni.
Ubuchule balo malathisi bubonisa uncedo oluxabisekileyo olunokufunyanwa lulutsha olungamaKristu ukuze lutyhubele iimeko ezinzima zobomi. Luluphi olu ncedo? Kutheni abo bakwishumi elivisayo belufuna?
Makhe sihlabele mgama nalo mzekeliso wenqanawa. Ukuba ungumntu ofikisayo, ngandlel’ ithile ufana nomphathi wenqanawa kuba ekugqibeleni ufanele wenze isigqibo ngobomi bakho. Yaye abazali bakho banendima efana nomalathisi wenqanawa njengoko bezama ukukukhokela kwezona meko zinzima oza kujamelana nazo ebomini. Noko ke, ebudeni beminyaka yeshumi elivisayo, usenokukufumanisa kunzima ukwamkela icebiso labazali bakho. Kutheni kunjalo nje?
Ingxaki idla ngokunxulumana nentliziyo. Intliziyo yakho yokomfuziselo isenokukwenza unqwenele oko kungavumelekanga okanye uchase nantoni na ovakalelwa kukuba iyisikela umda inkululeko yakho. IBhayibhile ithi: “Intliziyo yomntu ityekele ebubini kwasebutsheni bakhe.” (Genesis 8:21) UYehova uyakulumkisa ukuba uza kudibana neengxaki. Uthi: “Intliziyo inenkohliso ngaphezu kwezinto zonke, yaye inokukukhokelela engozini.” (Yeremiya 17:9, Rotherham) Ukongezelela ekubeni ikhuthaze iminqweno ephosakeleyo, intliziyo inokukhohlisa oselula acinge ukuba wazi ngakumbi kunabazali bakhe, nangona benamava kunaye. Noko ke, kukho izizathu ezisengqiqweni zokuba ufune uncedo lwabazali bakho ngoxa ukwiminyaka enzima yobutsha.
Kutheni Ufanele Uthobele Abazali Bakho?
Ngaphezu kwako konke, uYehova, uMsunguli wentsapho, ukuxelela ukuba ufanele uphulaphule ulwalathiso lwabazali bakho. (Efese 3:15) Ekubeni uThixo emisele abazali bakho ukuba bakunyamekele, ukunika esi siluleko: “Bantwana, into enifanele niyenze kukuthobela abazali benu njengoko bemiselwe yiNkosi.” (Efese 6:1-3, Phillips; INdumiso 78:5) Ngoxa mhlawumbi ngoku usekwiminyaka yakho yeshumi elivisayo, abazali bakho basenembopheleleko yokukukhokela, yaye unembopheleleko yokubaphulaphula. Xa umpostile uPawulos wabhala esithi abantwana bafanele baphulaphule abazali babo, wasebenzisa igama lesiGrike elisebenza kubo bonke abantwana kungakhathaliseki iminyaka yabo. Ngokomzekelo, njengoko kubhalwe kuMateyu 23:37, uYesu wabhekisela kubemi baseYerusalem ‘njengabantwana’ bakhe, nangona inkoliso yabo yayingabantu abakhulileyo.
Amadoda amaninzi athembekileyo amandulo aqhubeka ethobela abazali kwanaxa ayesele ekhulile. UYakobi, nangona wayesele ekhulile, waqonda ukuba wayefanele aphulaphule umyalelo kayise wokuphepha ukutshata umfazi ongamnquliyo uYehova. (Genesis 28:1, 2) Alithandabuzeki elokuba, uYakobi wayebonile ukuba isigqibo somntakwabo sokutshata nabafazi bamaKanan abangabahedeni kwabangela intlungu kubazali bakhe.—Genesis 27:46.
Ukongezelela kumsebenzi abawunikwe nguThixo wokukukhokela, abazali bakho abangamaKristu ngabona bakufanelekeleyo ukuba ngabacebisi bakho. Oku kungenxa yokuba ngokuyintloko bakwazi kakuhle yaye ngokungathabuzekiyo baye babonakalisa kuwe uthando lwabo lokungazingci kangangeminyaka emininzi. Njengomalathisi wenqanawa, banamava. Nabo bajamelana nazo ‘iinkanuko zobutsha.’ Yaye njengamaKristu okwenyaniso, baye bakubona ukubaluleka kokulandela imigaqo yeBhayibhile.—2 Timoti 2:22.
Uncedo olunjalo, luya kukwenza ukwazi ukusingatha nezona meko zinzima ngokuphumelelayo. Ngokomzekelo, cinga ngolwalamano lwakho nabo besini esahlukileyo. Umzali ongumKristu unokukunika luphi ukhokelo kulo mbandela ekungelula ukuthetha ngawo?
Ukuba Nomdla Kumntu Wesini Esahlukileyo
Umalathisi uye acebise umphathi wenqanawa ukuba acezele kude kwiinduli zesanti eziphantsi kwamanzi. Iinduli zesanti zithambile kodwa ziyingozi, ekubeni zingasoloko zime endaweni enye. Ngokufanayo abazali bakho bafuna ukuba uhambele kude kwizinto ezinokukubambisa. Ngokomzekelo, abazali bayazi ukuba zinamandla iimvakalelo ngomntu wesini esahlukileyo yaye kusenokuba nzima ukuzichaza. Kodwa xa zivuselelwe, ezi mvakalelo zinokukufaka engozini.
Umzekelo kaDina ubonisa oko kunokwenzeka xa ukhasel’ emlilweni. Mhlawumbi ukuthanda ukwazi nomnqweno wokuziyolisa kwakhokelela ekubeni uDina afune ukuba nobuhlobo neentombi zamaKanan, ezaziziphethe kakubi. Ukuzonwabisa okwakubonakala kungeyongozi ekuqaleni kamva kwakhokelela kwimeko ebuhlungu—wadlwengulwa ‘yeyona ndoda ibekekileyo’ esixekweni.—Genesis 34:1, 2, 19.
Iingozi ezinjalo zande kakhulu ngenxa yokuba abantu bathe phithi sisini kule mihla siphila kuyo. (Hoseya 5:4) Ulutsha oluninzi lusenokucinga ukuba ukuziyolisa nomntu wesini esahlukileyo yeyona nto imnandi. Isibakala sokuba ube wedwa kunye nomntu omjonga njengonomtsalane kunokukwenza ube nemincili. Kodwa abazali abanothando baya kuzama ukukuthintela ekubeni unxulumane nolutsha olungayihloneliyo imilinganiselo kaThixo.
ULaura uyavuma ukuba ukuthanda ukwazi kunokwenza abakwishumi elivisayo bangayiboni ingozi. “Xa amantombazana endifunda nawo endibalisela ukuba aye adanisa ubusuku bonke nabafana abahle, baye bakwenze oku kuvakale ngathi yinto engasoze ilibaleke. Ndiyabona ukuba basoloko bezibaxa izinto, kodwa sekunjalo ndisafun’ ukuzibonela yaye ndicinga ukuba ndiyaphoswa. Nangona ndisazi ukuba abazali bam benza into efanelekileyo ngokungandivumeli ukuba ndiye kwiindawo ezinjalo, kodwa ndisenomnqweno wokuya.”
Inqanawa ayinazo iziqhoboshi, ngenxa yoko ithabath’ ixesha elide ukuma. Abazali bayazi ukuba nentabatheko injalo. Incwadi yeMizekeliso ifanisa umntu oqhutywa yintabatheko engalawulekiyo njengenkunzi yenkomo eya ekuxhelweni. (IMizekeliso 7:21-23) Akufuni ukuba into enjalo yenzeke kuwe, nto leyo enokukukhokelela ukuba waphukelwe yinqanawa ngokweemvakalelo nangokomoya. Abazali bakho basenokubona xa intliziyo yakho iqalile ukukukhohlisa kule nkalo, yaye basenokukululeka ngendlela efanelekileyo. Ngaba ngobulumko uza kubaphulaphula uze uphephe intlekele?—IMizekeliso 1:8; 27:12.
Kwakhona ufuna inkxaso yabazali bakho xa kufuneka ujamelene nengcinezelo yoontanga. Banokukunceda njani?
Impembelelo Enamandla Yoontanga Bakho
Umsinga onamandla usenokuyiphambukisa inqanawa. Ukuze imelane noku, inqanawa ifanele iqhutyelwe ngakwelinye icala. Ngokufanayo, impembelelo yolunye ulutsha inokukuphambukisa ngokomoya ngaphandle kokuba uthabatha amanyathelo okuzikhusela.
Njengoko umzekelo kaDina ubonisa, “olikholwane lesidenge uya konakaliswa.” (IMizekeliso 13:20, IBhayibhile yesiXhosa) Khumbula ukuba iBhayibhile ithi, ‘isidenge’ ngumntu ongamaziyo uYehova okanye okhetha ukungahambi ngeendlela zakhe.
Noko ke, kusenokungabi lula ukuzichasa iingcamango okanye izenzo zabo ufunda nabo. UMaría José uthi: “Ndandifuna ukwamkelwa lolunye ulutsha. Ekubeni ndandingafuni lucinge ukuba ndahlukile, ndandisenza izinto oluzenzayo kangangoko ndinako.” Ungaqondanga usenokuphenjelelwa ngoontanga bakho—kumculo owukhethayo, indlela yokunxiba okanye kuquka nendlela othetha ngayo. Mhlawumbi uziva ukhululekile xa ukunye nolutsha oluziintanga zakho. Oko kungokwemvelo, kodwa kuya kulwenza lube nempembelelo gqitha kuwe nto leyo esenokuba yingozi.—IMizekeliso 1:10-16.
UCaroline ekhumbula ingxaki awayejamelene nayo kwiminyaka eliqela edluleyo, uthi: “Ukususela xa ndandineminyaka eli-13 ubudala, inkoliso yamantombazana endandinxulumana nawo ayethandana, yaye kangangeminyaka eliqela ndandisoloko ndifuna ukuwaxelisa. Noko ke, umama wandinceda kweli xesha linzima. Wayechitha ixesha elininzi endiphulaphule, eqiqa nam yaye endinceda ndibone imfuneko yokuba ndingangxami ndibe nolwalamano olunjalo de ndibe ndikhule ngokwaneleyo.”
Njengonina kaCaroline, abazali bakho banokuziva benembopheleleko yokukulumkisa ngengcinezelo yoontanga okanye bade bakwalele ukuba wenze izinto ezithile okanye ukuba nabahlobo abathile. UNathan ukhumbula izihlandlo ezininzi awayedla ngokuxambulisana nabazali bakhe ngalo mbandela. Uthi: “Abahlobo bam babedla ngokundimema ukuba ndihambe nabo, kodwa abazali bam babengafuni ndibe kunye neqela elininzi lolutsha okanye ndiye kumatheko ekungekho mntu mdala ubeke iliso ngoko kuqhubekayo. Maxa wambi, ndandiye ndingasiqondi isizathu sokuba abanye abazali bengekho ngqongqo njengabam.”
Noko ke, kamva uNathan wasiqonda. Uyavuma esithi: “Ndiyaqonda ukuba kwimeko yam ‘ubudenge babubotshiwe entliziyweni yenkwenkwe.’ Obu budenge buye bubonakale lula xa amakhwenkwe ebuthe kunye njengeqela. Omnye uye aqalise ukwenza into embi, aze omnye enze embi nangakumbi aze owesithathu enze embi ngaphezu kwezo. Kungekudala bonke abanye baye bakhuthazwe nabo ukuba benze okufanayo. Kwanolutsha oluzibanga lukhonza uYehova lunokuwela kulo mgibe.”—IMizekeliso 22:15
UNathan noMaría José babengasiqondi isizathu sokuba abazali babo babengabavumeli ukuba benze izinto ezikhuthazwa ngoontanga babo. Noko ke, babaphulaphula yaye emva koko bavuya kuba benjenjalo. Umzekeliso uthi: “Thoba indlebe yakho uze uve amazwi ezilumko, ukuze uyinikele kanye intliziyo yakho ukwazi kwam.”—IMizekeliso 22:17.
Bafanelwe Yimbeko
Inqanawa ekekeleyo kunzima ukuyiqhuba, yaye ukuba ikekela kakhulu, inokuqethuka ngokulula. Ngenxa yokungafezeki, sonke sityekela kwimikhwa yokuzingca nengavumelekanga. Phezu kwayo yonke le mikhwa, abaselula banokuphumelela ebomini, ukuba balulandela ngenyameko ukhokelo lwabazali babo.
Ngokomzekelo, abazali bakho banokukunceda ukuba uyigatye imbono yokuba, ngaphandle kwendlela emxinwa esa ebomini nendlela ebanzi esa entshabalalweni, kukwakho nendlela nje ephakathi. (Mateyu 7:13, 14) Akukho ngqiqweni ukucinga ukuba unokwenza ububi kodwa ungaqaqadeki, ngokungathi “unokuyingcamla” nje into embi kodwa ungayiginyi. Abo bazama ukulandela ikhondo elinjalo ‘bambaxa’—bakhonza uYehova ukusa kwinqanaba elithile kodwa kwakhona bathanda ihlabathi nezinto zalo—yaye banokuqethuka ngokulula ngokomoya. (1 Kumkani 18:21; 1 Yohane 2:15) Ngoba? Kungenxa yotyekelo lwethu lwesono.
Iminqweno yethu yesono iba namandla ukuba siyayivumela. ‘Intliziyo yethu enenkohliso’ ayisayi kwaneliswa nje kukungcamla. Iya kufuna okungakumbi. (Yeremiya 17:9) Xa siqalisa ukuphambuka ngokomoya, ihlabathi liya kusiphembelela ngakumbi nangakumbi. (Hebhere 2:1) Usenokungaphawuli ukuba uyakekela ngokomoya, kodwa kusenokwenzeka ukuba abazali bakho abangamaKristu bakubone. Liyinyaniso elokuba, basenokungakwazi ngolula ukusebenzisa ikhompyutha, kodwa bayazi ngaphezu kwakho intliziyo enenkohliso. Yaye bafuna ukukunceda “ukhokele intliziyo yakho endleleni” enokuba bubomi.—IMizekeliso 23:19.
Kakade ke, musa ukulindela ukuba abazali bakho benze izinto ngokugqibeleleyo xa befanele bakuncede kwimibandela enzima enjengomculo, ukuzonwabisa nendlela yokuzilungisa. Abazali bakho basenokungabi nabo ubulumko bukaSolomon okanye babe nomonde njengoYobhi. Njengomalathisi wenqanawa, basenokuxhalaba ngokugqith’ emgceni. Sekunjalo, ukhokelo lwabo luya kungqineka luxabisekile ukuba unikela ingqalelo ‘kwingqeqesho kayihlo, yaye akuwushiyi umthetho kanyoko.’—IMizekeliso 1:8, 9.
Olunye ulutsha lusenokuthetha ngokungenantlonelo ngabazali balo. Sekunjalo, ukuba abazali bakho bazabalazela ukulandela iZibhalo, baya kusoloko bekunye nawe ngalo lonke ixesha xa ujamelene neengxaki. Njengomphathi wenqanawa oye acetyiswe ngumalathisi onamava, ufanele ufumane ulwalathiso lwabazali bakho, oluya kukukhokelela kwindlela yobulumko. Umvuzo woku awunakuthelekiswa nanto.
“Xa ubulumko bungena entliziyweni yakho nolwazi luthandeka emphefumlweni wakho, amandla okucinga aya kukulinda, ukuqonda kuya kukulondoloza, ukuze kukuhlangule endleleni embi, emntwini othetha izinto ezigwenxa, kwabo bashiya umendo wokuthe tye ukuze bahambe ngeendlela zobumnyama . . . Kuba abathe tye bona baya kuhlala emhlabeni, nabangenakusoleka baya kusala kuwo.”—IMizekeliso 2:10-13, 21.
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 22]
Impembelelo yolunye ulutsha inokukuphambukisa ngokomoya
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 23]
Khumbula okwenzeka kuDina
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 24]
Njengomphathi wenqanawa oye acetyiswe ngumalathisi onamava, abantu abaselula bafanele bafune ukhokelo lwabazali babo
[Inkcazelo Ngomfanekiso okwiphepha 24]
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