Intsha Iyabuza . . .

Ngingayenza Kanjani Ingiyeke?

UJOSEFA wayeyinsizwa ethandwayo. Ekhuthele, enokwethenjelwa, futhi ebukeka kahle, wayethandwa yiwo wonke umuntu ayesebenza naye. Inkinga yayiwukuthi, nomkamqashi wakhe naye wayemthanda. Ukumbuka kwakhe ngendlela yokumkhanga kwakuya ngokuya kubeka inselele; inkulumo yakhe yokudlala ngothando yayiya iqina.

UJosefa wazama ukungakunaki ukweshela kwakhe, kodwa ngolunye usuku emsebenzini, wazithola eyedwa naye. Lona owesifazane wayekuhlele ngokucophelela; akekho omunye owayezokuba khona lapho isikhathi esithile. Ngaphambi kokuba uJosefa aqaphele ukuthi kwenzekani, wayezilahlela kuye ngokoqobo, emncenga ukuba alale naye!​—⁠Genesise 39:​7-⁠12.

Lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho okungokoqobo ekuphileni kwenzeka eminyakeni engaphezu kwengu-⁠3 500 edlule. Kodwa izehlakalo ezifanayo zenzeka nsuku zonke esikoleni nasemsebenzini. Nakuba ezezindaba ziye zakhuluma kakhulu ngokukhathazwa kwabesifazane​—⁠futhi kube kufanele⁠—​inkinga evame ukunganakwa eyokukhathazwa ngokobulili kwabafana.a Njengoba umphakathi wanamuhla ugcizelela ubulili namalungelo alinganayo abesifazane, kanye nezindinganiso zawo eziwohlokayo zokuziphatha nezenhlalo, akufanele kusimangaze ukuthi abafana abaningi babika ukuthi baye baba izisulu zokuhlaselwa abesifazane ngezothando.

Abanye abafana babonakala bekwamukela lokhu kushintsha kwesimo; bekhohliswa ukunakwa ngabesifazane. Nokho, intsha engamaKristu inamathela ezindinganisweni zeBhayibheli zokuziphatha ngokobulili. Ayifuni ukukhathazwa abesifazane abangenasimilo abanezinhloso zokuziphatha okubi. Umbuzo uwukuthi, Ingakugwema kanjani ukukhathazwa okunjalo?

Kungani Kwenzeka Kimi?

IBhayibheli lithi: “Udumo lwabasha lungamandla abo.” (IzAga 20:​29) Ubuhle bobusha, buhambisana nokuhlanzeka kokuziphatha komfana nemikhuba emihle yobuKristu, kungakhanga kakhulu kowesifazane. Abanye bangase ngisho babheke ukonakalisa ubumsulwa bomKristu osemusha njengenselele ethakazelisayo.

Khona-ke kunethonya lomphakathi wanamuhla. Izincwadi eziningi nezihloko kulotshelwe ukuba kusize amantombazane adonse ukunakekela kwabesilisa. Omagazini bentsha ngokuvamile bakhuthaza amantombazane ukuba adlale ngothando ngokungazinyezi. Umagazini iSeventeen wathi: “Ukudlala ngothando kuyindlela enkulu yokwenza othile azi ukuthi umthola . . . ekhanga. . . . Kungaholela ebunganeni noma othandweni.” Izindinganiso eziqanjwa abezindaba nezimo zengqondo zokunganaki neziyekelelayo ezisakazeke yonke indawo nazo zisebenzela ukuwohloza ukuqina kokuziphatha kwabafana. Umlobi uKathy McCoy uyaphawula: “Umphakathi uwonke nabazali ikakhulukazi ontanga ngokuvamile abakunaki kakhulu ukuhileleka kwabafana ebulilini. Ezinye izazi zikholelwa ukuthi abafana bathola isikhuthazo esingashiwo ngomlomo . . . sokushisekela ubulili.”

Nokho, iZwi likaNkulunkulu liyala intsha ukuba ihlale imsulwa. “Ngokuba lokhu kuyintando kaNkulunkulu, ukungcweliswa kwenu, ukuba nidede ebufebeni.” (1 Thesalonika 4:⁠3) Awunakuvumela amathonya alelizwe akudukise! Pho, yini okufanele uyenze uma othile wobulili obuhlukile ekweshela?

Isizathu Sokuba Kube Nzima Ukwenqaba

Nakuba ngokuvamile abesilisa beye babehlula ngamandla abesifazane abenqaba ukweshela kwabo, akuvamile ukuba abesifazane behlule abesilisa ngaleyondlela. Pho, kungani kunzima kangaka ngomfana ukumelana nentombazane engenasimilo?

Esinye isizathu siwukuthi “inhliziyo iyakhohlisa.” (Jeremiya 17:⁠9) Njengoba uWayne osemusha avuma: “Cishe uyalulangazelela lolohlobo lokunakwa. Kukunikeza umuzwa ofudumele ukwazi ukuthi othile unesithakazelo. Kungokuthophayo.” Yiqiniso, kungokwemvelo ukujabulela ukunakwa abesifazane. Kodwa qaphela! Inhliziyo yakho ekhohlisayo ingase ibangele lezifiso ezingokwemvelo zinqobe ukwahlulela kwakho okuhle. (Jakobe 1:​14, 15) Ngaphambi kokuba ukuqaphele, ungabe usudonswe ‘njengenkabi iya ekuhlatshweni’!​—⁠IzAga 7:⁠22.

Ngakho izAga zixwayisa abafana ukuba bagade ‘ukuthopha kolimi lowesifazane oziphethe kabi. Bangakhanukeli ubuhle bakhe enhliziyweni yabo, futhi angababambi ngezinkophe zakhe.’ (IzAga 6:​24, 25) Khona-ke, isihluthulelo siwukulawula inhliziyo nezifiso zakho siqu. (1 Thesalonika 4:​4-⁠6) Kulapho ukholelwa ngokugcwele ukuthi ukuziphatha okubi ngokobulili akukunikezi lutho ngaphandle ‘kwezindlela zokufa,’ lapho ungakwazi khona ukuzivikela ngokwanelisayo nangokuphumelelayo.​—⁠IzAga 7:​27.b

Ukubhekana Nokucindezela

“Amantombazane ayaphikelela; alokhu ebuya,” kusho enye insizwa. “Akuncoma kakhulu futhi asebenzise ukuthopha okuningi.” Kudala ukuthopha kwakuyisikhali sowesifazane ongenasizotha. Ingabe kukuthonya kalula? (IzAga 26:​28) “Kwabathobekileyo kukhona ukuhlakanipha,” kuphawula izAga 11:⁠2, futhi uma unombono olinganiselwe ngawe ngokwakho, ngeke ube isisulu sokuthopha okuyize.

Kodwa uthini lapho intombazane incoma izinwele zakho, isimo somzimba, noma ukumamatheka kwakho? Mhlawumbe akukho zinhloso ezimbi ezihilelekile. Ngokungafuni ukubonakala iyizinothongwana, enye intsha imane iyibonge intombazane ngokuncoma kwayo​—⁠futhi ngokushesha ishintshe indaba. Nokho, qaphela unganikezi umuzwa wokuthi uyayijabulela inkulumo yokudlala ngothando.

Ngezinye izikhathi kudingeka izinyathelo eziqinile. Abanye basingatha indaba ngokuthe ngqó ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka. Ngalendlela bagwema ukuqhubekisela phambili isimo esingajabulisi kakade. “Anginasithakazelo sokuthandana nentombazane okwamanje” leyo impendulo eqondile kaDaniel osemusha.

Ngokuvamile kuye kwathiwa isivikelo esingcono kakhulu siwukuhlasela okuhle. Omunye umcwaningi unikeza lesiseluleko: “Ukuze wenze lowomuntu akuyeke unomphela ngezothando, ngena engxoxweni yenkolo.” Yebo, uma waziwa njengomuntu oxoxa njalo ngezinkolelo zakhe ezingokwenkolo, cishe ngeke ube isisulu kwasekuqaleni. Futhi uma othile eza kuwe, inkulumo eqondile ngezinkolelo zakho ezingokwenkolo ingase imenze ayeke ngokushesha.

Ngeshwa, ngezinye izikhathi intsha engamaKristu iyehluleka ukusebenzisa lesivikelo esihle kakhulu. UTim omncane uthi: “Iningi lethu lalimane nje lingafuni ukuthi, ‘Bheka! NgingumKristu, futhi angifuni ukwenza lento.’ Sasifuna ukwamukeleka.” Siyaphinda futhi, kuphela uma ukholelwa ngempela ukuthi indlela kaJehova iyona engcono kakhulu lapho uyoba nesibindi esidingekile sokubalekela inhlekelele yokuziphatha.

Ukubalekela Ugibe!

Kuthiwani uma naphezu kwemizamo yakho emihle, ukuhlasela kuqhubeka? Nokho, cabanga futhi ngesibonelo sensizwa okuxoxwe ngayo ekuqaleni​—⁠uJosefa. UGenesise 39:⁠6 (NW) usitshela ukuthi ‘wakhula waba nomzimba omuhle futhi wabukeka’ wayekhanga kumkankosi yakhe, uPotifari. Wenza konke okusemandleni akhe ukuba amyenge. Futhi iBhayibheli alibonisi ukuthi wayemubi noma ukuthi wayenyanyeka ngandlela-thile kuJosefa. Nokho, wakwenqaba ukweshela kwakhe. Wakwazi kanjani ukwenza kanjalo?

Okokuqala, uJosefa wayeqinile ezinkolelweni zakhe. “Pho, ngingenza kanjani lobobubi obungaka, ngone kuNkulunkulu, na?” esho. Nakuba wawungekho umthetho oqondile owawulotshiwe owawumelene nobulili ngaphambi komshado ngalesosikhathi, unembeza wakhe wamtshela ukuthi lokho umkaPotifari ayefuna ukukwenza kwakungalungile. Nakuba kunjalo, waphikelela. Esephelelwe ithemba wambamba ngengubo yakhe futhi wamncenga: “Lala nami.” UJosefa akazange achithe isikhathi ezama ukwenza lula lesosimo ngehlaya, futhi akazange amshumayeze ngokuziphatha. Ngokushesha “washiya ingubo yakhe esandleni sakhe, wabaleka.”​—⁠Genesise 39:​9-⁠12.

UJosefa wakwazi ukubaleka masinyane ngoba kwakungadingeki anqume okwakumelwe akwenze. Isinqumo sakhe sase senziwe kakade. Wakhetha ukubhekana nemiphumela yokuthukuthela kwakhe kunokudumaza uJehova. Futhi imiphumela yayibuhlungu; uJosefa wafakwa etilongweni! Kodwa uJehova wayibusisa imizamo yakhe yokuhlala emsulwa. Ekugcineni waba ilungu elivelele lendlu kaFaro futhi waphinde wahlangana nomkhaya wakubo ayesehlukane nawo isikhathi eside.

Imizamo yakho yokuhlala ‘ungasoleki futhi ungenabala . . . phakathi kwesizukulwane esiyisigwegwe nesiphambeneyo’ nayo ngokufanayo uJehova uyoyibusisa. (Filipi 2:​15) Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi izinto zingase zibonakale zinjani ekuqaleni, ngaso sonke isikhathi inkambo elungile iyophumela esibusisweni. Kodwa kumelwe uzimisele ukuhlala umsulwa njengoJosefa. Kumelwe uphikelele futhi unamathele emizamweni yakho, wenze ‘uqhabo wakho abe uqhabo.’ (Mathewu 5:​37) Kumelwe ukulungele futhi uzimisele ukuhlanganyela izinkolelo zakho ezisekelwe eBhayibhelini. Uma wenza kanjalo, ngisho namantombazane onakele kakhulu ayosithola isigijimi​—⁠futhi cishe akuyeke!

[Imibhalo yaphansi]

[Isithombe ekhasini 19]

Usabela kanjani ekweshelelweni ukuziphatha okubi?