Intsha Iyabuza . . .

Ngingabhekana Kanjani Nokuhlukunyezwa Ngokobulili?

“Abafana bashaya amakhwela futhi bakhuzele.”—UCarla, e-Ireland.

“Amantombazane akufundekela ngezingcingo. Azama ukukukhipha inkani.”—UJason, e-United States.

“Wayelokhu engithinta ingalo ezama nokungibamba isandla.”—UYukiko, eJapane.

“Amantombazane asho izinto ezisikisela ubulili kimi.”—U-Alexander, e-Ireland.

“Omunye umfana wayelokhu engimemeza esebhasini lezingane zesikole. Akukona ukuthi wayefuna ukuthandana nami. Wayemane nje engihlukumeza.”—URosilyn, e-United States.

UKUBUKA kothando, “ukuncoma” okusikisela ubulili, ihlaya elingcolile nokuthinta okusikisela ubulili ngokusobala—ukuphathwa kanjalo, uma kungathandeki futhi kuphindaphindwa, ngokuvamile kuphumela kulokho okubizwa ngokuthi ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili. Nakuba kungelula ukuthola izibalo zomhlaba wonke, ukuhlola kubonisa ukuthi intsha eningi esesesikoleni e-United States iye yabhekana nako.

Kodwa kuyini ngempela ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili? Incwadi ethi Coping With Sexual Harassment and Gender Bias, kaDkt. Victoria Shaw, ikuchaza ngokuthi “ukukhathaza othile ngendlela esikisela ubulili . . . Kungaba ngokomzimba (njengokuthinta othile ngendlela esikisela ubulili), ngokukhuluma (njengokuphawula okungathandeki ngokubukeka komuntu), noma okunye okungekhona ukukhuluma.” Ngezinye izikhathi ukuhlukunyezwa kuhilela ukushelwa ngendlela engahloniphekile.

Cishe ukuhlukunyezwa okuningi esikoleni kwenziwa ontanga yakho. Nokho, kwezinye izimo ukuziphatha okucasulayo kwenziwa abantu abadala, njengothisha. Isihloko esikumagazini i-Redbook sibonisa ukuthi inani elincane lothisha eliboshelwa amacala obulili “cishe lincane kakhulu kunenani langempela.”

Abesifazane—futhi ngezinye izikhathi abesilisa—babeyizisulu zokuhlukunyezwa okunjalo emuva ezikhathini zeBhayibheli. (Genesise 39:7; Ruthe 2:8, 9, 15) Futhi iBhayibheli lenza lokhu kubikezela okukhwantabalisayo: “Ezinsukwini zokugcina kuyoba nezikhathi ezinzima. Abantu bayoba nobugovu, nokuhaha, nokuqhosha kanye nokuzazisa; bayoba abaklolodayo . . . ; bayoba abangenamusa, abangenasihe, abanyundeli, abanobudlova nabanolaka.” (2 Thimothewu 3:1-3, Today’s English Version) Ngakho kungenzeka, futhi maningi amathuba okuba nawe ngokwakho uhlukunyezwe ngokobulili.

Umbono KaNkulunkulu

Kuyavunywa, akuyona yonke intsha ekhathazwa izenzo ezihlukumezayo ngokobulili. Enye ingase ikuzwe kumnandi—noma ikujabulele. Okunye ukuhlola kwase-United States okwethusayo kwabonisa ukuthi phakathi kwezisulu zokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili, abangamaphesenti angu-75 bavuma ukuthi bona ngokwabo babexhaphazé abanye. Abanye abantu abadala bangase benze kube kubi nakakhulu ngokungakushayi mkhuba ukungathi sína kwezenzo ezihlukumezayo ngokobulili, bangabi nandaba nje bathi into obhekana nayo uma usakhula. Kodwa uNkulunkulu ukubheka kanjani?

IZwi likaNkulunkulu, iBhayibheli, lizilahla ngokucacile zonke izinhlobo zokuhlukumeza ngokobulili. Sitshelwa ukuba ‘singangeneli emalungelweni’ abanye ngokwephula imingcele yobulili. (1 Thesalonika 4:3-8) Eqinisweni, izinsizwa ziyalwa ngokuqondile ukuba ziphathe ‘abesifazane abasha njengawodadewabo ngabo bonke ubumsulwa.’ (1 Thimothewu 5:1, 2) Ngaphezu kwalokho, iBhayibheli liyakulahla “ukuntela okuyichilo.” (Efesu 5:3, 4) Ngakho-ke, unelungelo lokucasuka, uthukuthele, udideke noma ngisho uzizwe ululazekile lapho uhlukunyezwa!

Kufanele Ngithini?

Pho-ke, kufanele usabele kanjani uma othile ekukhathaza ngale ndlela? Ngezinye izikhathi impendulo ethambile noma engacacile imane yenze umuntu okuhlukumezayo aqinise imizamo yakhe. IBhayibheli lisitshela ukuthi ngesikhathi uJosefa eshelwa inkosikazi yomqashi wakhe, akazange amane angayinaki. Kunalokho, wakwenqaba ngokuqinile ukweshela kwayo kokuziphatha okubi. (Genesise 39:8, 9, 12) Namuhla, ukukhuluma ngokuqinile nangokuqondile kuseyindlela engcono kakhulu yokuvimbela ukuhlukunyezwa.

Yiqiniso, lowo okukhathazayo kungase kube ukuthi akaqondile ukukucasula. Lokho okubukeka njengokuhlukumeza empeleni kungase kube umzamo owububhimbi wokuzama ukuba umnake. Ngakho ungabi nomuzwa wokuthi kudingeka ubonise ukuba luhlaza ukuze uvimbele ukweshelwa okungafunwa. Ukumane usho okuthile okunjengokuthi, ‘Angiluthandi lolo hlobo lwenkulumo’ noma ‘Ngicela ungangibambi’ kungase kumenze alithole iphuzu. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukubeka kanjani, yigcizelele inkulumo yakho. Ucha wakho makabe ucha! U-Andrea osemusha ukubeka ngale ndlela: “Uma bengezwa lapho ubabonisa ngomusa, kudingeka ubatshele ngokuqondile. Ngokuvamile kuze kufike lapho.” Ukusho ngokuqinile uthi ‘Hlukana naleyo nto!’ kungase kuphumelele.

Uma isimo singasalawuleki, ungazami ukusisingatha wedwa. Zama ukuxoxa ngaso nabazali bakho noma abantu abathile abavuthiwe. Bangase babe nokusikisela okuwusizo kokubhekana nesimo. Uma yonke imizamo yehluleka, bangase babone kudingekile ukutshela izikhulu zesikole. Nakuba ukwenza kanjalo kungase kukubangele amahloni, kungakuvikela ekuqhubekeni uyisisulu.

Ukuvimbela Ukuhlukunyezwa

Yiqiniso, kungcono ukugwema ukuba yisisulu zisuka nje. Yini engakusiza kulokhu? U-Andrea uyaxwayisa: “Ungalokothi unikeze umbono wokuthi sengathi unesithakazelo. Abanye bazokuzwa bese kuyaqhubeka ukucindezela.” Indlela ogqoka ngayo ingafeza lukhulu. UMara osemusha uthi: “Angigqoki njengesalukazi, kodwa ngiyazigwema izingubo ezidonsela ukunakekela emzimbeni wami.” Ukwenqaba ukushelelwa ubulili kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo ube ugqoka izingubo ezivusa inkanuko kungase kunikeze imiyalezo edidayo. IBhayibheli litusa ukugqoka “ngesizotha nangokuhluzeka kwengqondo.”—1 Thimothewu 2:9.

Indlela okhetha ngayo abangane nayo iyayithinta indlela ophathwa ngayo. (IzAga 13:20) URosilyn uyaphawula: “Uma amanye amantombazane eqenjini ethanda ukunakwa abafana, abafana bangase bacabange ukuthi wonke amantombazane kulelo qembu anjalo.” UCarla washo iphuzu elifanayo: “Uma ujwayelene nabantu abakwamukelayo noma abakuthandayo ukunakwa, nawe uzohlukunyezwa.”

IBhayibheli lisitshela ngentombi egama layo kwakunguDina eyayijwayelene namantombazane aseKhanani—lapho abesifazane babedume khona ngokuziphatha okuxekethile. Lokhu kwaholela ekutheni adlwengulwe. (Genesise 34:1, 2) Ngezizathu ezinhle iBhayibheli lithi: “Qaphelisisani ukuthi indlela enihamba ngayo ayinjengeyabantu abangahlakaniphile kodwa injengeyabahlakaniphileyo.” (Efesu 5:15) Yebo, ‘ukuqaphelisisa’ indlela ogqoka ngayo, okhuluma ngayo nokuthi ujwayelana nobani kungenza lukhulu ekukuvikeleni ekuhlukunyezweni.

Nokho, entsheni engamaKristu, enye yezindlela eziphumelela kakhulu zokuvimbela ukuhlukunyezwa ukumane utshele abanye ngokuma kwakho okungokwenkolo. UTimon osemusha, ongomunye woFakazi BakaJehova, uyakhumbula: “Izingane zazazi ukuthi nginguFakazi, ngakho lokho kwaqeda cishe konke ukuhlukunyezwa.” U-Andrea uyaphawula: “Ukubatshela ukuthi unguFakazi kwenza umehluko omkhulu. Bayoqaphela ukuthi ngezindlela eziningi uhlukile kubo nokuthi unezindinganiso zokuziphatha eziqinile.”—Mathewu 5:15, 16.

Uma Uhlukunyezwa

Nakuba ungase uzame konke ongakwenza, ngeke ubagweme ngokuphelele abantu abaluhlaza, abahlambalazayo. Kodwa uma uyisisulu sokuhlukunyezwa, asikho isizathu sokuba uzilahle ngecala—uma nje uye waziphatha njengomKristu. (1 Petru 3:16, 17) Uma isimo sikucindezela ngokomzwelo, thola ukusekelwa ngokukhuluma nabazali bakho noma abathile abavuthiwe ebandleni lobuKristu. URosilyn uyavuma ukuthi kunzima ukuzizwa ujabule ngawe ngokwakho uma uhlukunyezwa. Uthi: “Ukuba nomngane, othile ongaxoxa naye, kungcono kakhulu.” Khumbula futhi ukuthi “uJehova useduze nabo bonke abambizayo.”—IHubo 145:18, 19.

Ukumelana nokuphathwa kabi akulula, kodwa kuwufanele umzamo. Ngokwesibonelo, cabangela ukulandisa kweBhayibheli ngowesifazane osemusha waseShunemi. Nakuba kwakungekhona ngempela ukuthi uyahlukunyezwa ngendlela leli gama elivame ukuqondwa ngayo namuhla, wayeshelwa uSolomoni inkosi ecebile nenamandla yakwaJuda. Ngenxa yokuthi wayethandana nenye indoda, wakwenqaba lokho kweshelwa. Wayengasho ngokuziqhenya ngaye ngokwakhe athi, “Ngilugange.”—IsiHlabelelo seziHlabelelo 8:4, 10.

Nawe bonisa ukuqina nokuzimisela okufanayo ngokuziphatha. Yiba “ugange” uma weshelwa ungafuni. Yenza ukuma kwakho kobuKristu kucace kubo bonke abantu. Ngokwenza kanjalo, ungahlala ‘ungongasoleki nomsulwa’ futhi uqiniseka ukuthi ujabulise uNkulunkulu.—Filipi 2:15.a

[Umbhalo waphansi]

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Ukwenza izinkolelo zakho zobuKristu zaziwe kungaba yisivikelo

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Ngokungazihlanganisi nababi, ungase ukuvimbele ukuhlukunyezwa