Lapho Izingane Zithunjwa Abazali

NGEMVA kokushaywa ngesihluku nokuxhashazwa ngokungathi sína ngokomzwelo umyeni wakhe iminyaka eminingi futhi ekugcineni ashiywe ngenxa yomunye wesifazane, uCheryl wafaka isehlukaniso.a Njengoba izingane ayeziwine ngokuphelele enkantolo, kancane kancane isimo saqala ukuba ngcono njengoba ayeqala ukulungisa ukuphila kwakhe—kwaze kwaba ngolunye usuku lapho kukhala ucingo. Kwakungumyeni wakhe wangaphambili. Wathi: “Uma ufuna ukubona izingane zakho futhi, kumelwe uvume ukuba siphinde sishade”! Njengoba zazinqatshelwe ukubuyela kunina ngemva kokuvakashela uyise inyanga eyodwa ezweni azalelwa kulo, izingane zikaCheryl zazithunjiwe.

Ekhungathekile, uCheryl wacela usizo kuyi-U.S. State Department kodwa wangathola ndlela engokomthetho yokubuyisa izingane zakhe kwelinye izwe. Imizwa yokungavikeleki ayenayo eminyakeni eminingi ngenxa yokushaywa yabuya. Uyachaza: “Kucishe kufane. Awuyazi indlela yokukunqanda.”

“Ubudlova Obungokwengqondo”

Ukuthumba kwabazali kuye kwabizwa ngokuthi “isenzo esiphakeme sobudlova obungokwengqondo” esenziwa kumzali nasenganeni. UCarolyn Zogg, umqondisi ophethe i-Child Find of America, Inc., wathi ngabathumbi abanjalo: “Abazali abaningi abenza lokhu bayaziphindiselela, futhi baphindisela ngendlela embi ngangokunokwenzeka futhi endaweni engavikelekile kakhulu. Leyo indawo esondele kakhulu [kumzali owine izingane ngokomthetho]—igugu labo, izingane zabo. . . . Abayicabangeli ingane, bazicabangela bona kuphela nokuphindisela—ukuphindisela, ukubuyisa izinduku.”

Ukuthunjwa kwengane akumenzi nje kuphela umzali azizwe ethukuthele, elahlekelwe, engavikelekile, futhi ekhathazekile kodwa cishe ngaso sonke isikhathi ngezinga elithile kulimaza inhlalakahle engokomzwelo yengane. Kwezinye izimo ingane ingase iphoqeleleke ukuba ihlale ibaleka, igwema ubuhlobo obuseduze futhi izwa izinto ezingalungile namanga ngomunye umzali. Lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho kungase kubangele uchungechunge lokuphazamiseka, njengokuchama ebusuku, ukuqwasha, umkhuba wokunamathela kakhulu kumzali, ukwesaba amafasitela neminyango, nokwethuka ngokweqile. Ngisho nasezinganeni ezikhulile, kungabangela usizi nentukuthelo.

E-United States, kunezenzakalo ezingu-350-000 unyaka ngamunye lapho umzali ethatha ingane ephula isinqumo senkantolo sokuwina izingane noma ahluleke ukubuyisa ingane ngesikhathi asinikeziwe. Kulezizenzakalo ezingaphezu kuka-100 000, ingane ifihlwa ilungu lomkhaya ngenhloso yokuba omunye umzali angayitholi unomphela. Ezinye ziyasuswa kulesosifundazwe noma ziyiswe ngisho nakwelinye izwe.

Ezinye Izizathu

Ingabe ngaso sonke isikhathi abazali bathumba izingane zabo ngoba befisa ukubuyisana noma ngoba benomoya wokuziphindiselela? UMichael Knipfing we-Child Find uchaza ukuthi abanye abazali besaba ukuthi bazohlulwa umngane wabo womshado wangaphambili embangweni wokuwinwa kwezingane bese-ke “ngenxa yokwesaba bafune ukuthatha izingane kuqala.” Noma lapho ukuwinwa kwezingane sekunqunyiwe futhi omunye wabazali eqhubeka enqabela izingane ukuba zivakashele omunye, kuba nokukhungatheka. UKnipfing uyachaza: “Uma uyithanda ingane yakho bese wenqatshelwa ukuyibona, uthambekela ekucabangeni ukuthi awunalo elinye isu ngaphandle kokuyithatha weqe nayo.”

Futhi uphawula ukuthi ‘abantu abaningi abayiqapheli imiphumela yokuthumba ingane. Abaqapheli ukuthi kuzoba nzima ukuthola umsebenzi. Kukhishwa imvume yokuba baboshwe. Bacabanga ukuthi inkinga iphakathi kwabo nomunye umzali kuphela. Abaqapheli ukuthi amaphoyisa ayahileleka. Badinga abameli ababili esikhundleni soyedwa ngoba sebenecala lobugebengu okudingeka babhekane nalo kanye nenkinga yamalungelo, ukuthi ubani owina izingane.’

Abanye abazali bangase bacabange ukuthi lona omunye umzali ulimaza ingane yabo. Uma umthetho ungathathi isinyathelo ngokushesha, khona-ke umzali ophelelwe yithemba angase athathe isinyathelo naphezu kwemiphumela engavela. Lokhu kwabonakala endabeni kaHilary Morgan oneminyaka emihlanu ubudala. Udokotela wezifo zengqondo zezingane waluleka ukuba ukuvakashelana kukaHilary noyise kufanele kunqamuke, ethi ubufakazi bokuxhaphaza “busobala futhi buqinisekile.” Nokho, izinkantolo zanquma ukuthi kwakungenasiqinisekiso sokuxhashazwa zase zinquma ukuthi bavakashelane ngaphandle kokubekwa iso. UDkt. Elizabeth Morgan, unina kaHilary, ephula umthetho wenkantolo, wafihla indodakazi yakhe. Umphakathi uzwelana kakhulu nomzali othumba ingane bese ebaleka ukuze ayivikele.

Endabeni ka-Elizabeth Morgan, walahlekelwa umsebenzi wakhe wobudokotela, wagqunywa ejele iminyaka engaphezu kwemibili, futhi waba nezikweletu zokwelapha nezomthetho ezingaphezu kwama-dollar ayizigidi ezingu-1,5 (amaRandi ayizigidi ezingu-5,4). Wachazela i-U.S.News & World Report: “Ochwepheshe bangitshela ukuthi ingane yami ngabe isangene unomphela manje ukuba angizange ngikunqande ukuxhashazwa. . . . Kwakumelwe ngenze umsebenzi inkantolo eyenqaba ukuwenza: Ukusindisa ingane yami.”

Kuyiqiniso ngempela okwaphawulwa abacwaningi uGreif noHegar ngokuphathelene nokuthumba kwabazali: “Lezi izenzakalo eziyinkimbinkimbi ngokweqile, njengechibi elijulile, elibukeka lingafani kuye ngokwendlela olibuka ngayo; isikhathi ngasinye lapho umuntu ebuka emanzini ubona okuthile okusha.”—When Parents Kidnap—The Families Behind the Headlines.

Ngaphezu kwezingane ezithunjwa abazali noma umuntu ezingamazi, kunezigidi zezinye izingane ezidukayo emhlabeni wonke—ezilahlwayo nezibaleka emakhaya. Zingobani, futhi kwenzekani kuzo?

[Umbhalo waphansi]