Intsha Iyabuza . . . 

Ngingayeka Kanjani Ukuzama Ukungabi Naphutha?

“Ukufuna ukuphelela kukulawula ngempela ukuphila kwami.”—UCarly.

UKUFUNA UKUPHELELA—okuyinkolelo yokuthi akufanele nakancu kube nephutha kunoma yini umuntu ayenzayo—kuhlupha ukucabanga kwentsha eningi.

Incwadi ethi Perfectionism—What’s Bad About Being Too Good? ithi: “Kunomehluko omkhulu phakathi kokukuphishekela ngendlela enempilo ukwenza kahle nokukulwela ngendlela engenampilo ukufinyelela umgomo ongenakufinyeleleka. Abantu abalwela ukwenza kahle bangaba nesifiso esinamandla sokuhleleka bazibekele nemigomo ephakeme, kodwa bayawamukela amaphutha abo futhi banezindlela ezinhle zokubhekana nawo. . . . Ngakolunye uhlangothi, abantu abafuna ukuphelela bahlala bekhathazekile ngokuthi bazokwenza amaphutha. Bazibekela izindinganiso eziphakeme ngokwedlulele.”

Ingabe le ncazelo ichaza wena? Uma izindinganiso zakho ziphakeme ngendlela engafinyeleleki, kulula ukuba ukhinyabezeke. Ungase uzithole ugwema ukwenza noma yini entsha. Noma ungase uthambekele ekuhlehliseni izinto ezibalulekile okumelwe uzenze ngoba nje wesaba ukuthi zizokwehlula. Ungase uzizwe uthambekele ngisho nasekuhlukaneni nanoma ubani ongahlangabezani nezindinganiso zakho, bese uzithola ungenabangane.

Uma ngandlela-thile le ncazelo engenhla ichaza wena, cabangela amazwi eBhayibheli kumShumayeli 7:16, athi: “Ungabi olunge ngokwedlulele, noma uzibonise uhlakaniphe ngokweqile. Kungani kufanele uzibangele incithakalo?” Yebo, umuntu olwela ukungenzi phutha angase ‘azibangele incithakalo’! Empeleni, ukufuna ukuphelela kuye kwahlanganiswa ngisho nanezinkinga zokudla ezisongela ukuphila ezinjengokuzincisha ukudla ngokwedlulele nokuzigcingca ngokudla.a

Ngakho-ke, ungase ubuze, ‘Ngingayeka kanjani ukuzama ukungabi naphutha?’ Kuyavunywa ukuthi kungase kube yinselele impela ukushintsha indlela yakho yokucabanga kule ndaba. Kodwa kungenzeka ngosizo lukaNkulunkulu. Ngakho-ke, ake sibheke umbono kaNkulunkulu ngokungenzi amaphutha.

Ukuphelela—Ingabe Kuwumgomo Ofinyelelekayo?

Okokuqala, ingabe kungenzeka ukuba ube ophelele ngomqondo okuyiwonawona? Akunjalo ngokweBhayibheli, elithi: “Akekho umuntu olungileyo, ngisho noyedwa . . . Bonke baphambukile, bebonke baye baba yize.” (Roma 3:10-12) Amazwi okufanele sicabangisise kakhulu ngawo, akunjalo? Abonisa ukuthi noma ubani ozama ukungabi naphutha ngokuphelele ngeke aphumelele.

Cabanga ngomphostoli uPawulu, ngokusobala owayeyisibonelo esivelele somuntu ongokomoya. Kodwa, ngisho naye uPawulu akakwazanga ukukhonza uNkulunkulu ngaphandle kokwenza iphutha. Wavuma: “Lapho ngifisa ukwenza okuhle, kukhona okubi kimi. Ngiyajabula ngempela ngomthetho kaNkulunkulu ngokomuntu enginguye ngaphakathi, kodwa ngibona emalungwini ami omunye umthetho olwa nomthetho wengqondo yami futhi ongithumbela emthethweni wesono osemalungwini ami.” (Roma 7:21-23) UPawulu wakwazi ukwethembeka njengomKristu ngosizo lukaNkulunkulu kuphela.

Siyabonga ngoba uNkulunkulu akafune ukuba sibe abaphelele ngomqondo ophelele kunjalo nje akakulindele futhi. “Ngoba yena uyakwazi ukwakheka kwethu, ekhumbula ukuthi siluthuli.” (IHubo 103:14) Abantu bayokwazi ukufinyelela ukuphelela ezweni elisha likaNkulunkulu kuphela.

Ukulungisa Imigomo Yethu

Khona-ke, njengoba sisalindele leso sikhathi, akunangqondo ukucabanga ukuthi ungaphelela ngomqondo okuyiwonawona. Empeleni kufanele ukulindele ukuthi uzowenza amaphutha ngezikhathi ezithile. (Roma 3:23) Phela, ngezinye izikhathi asiwaboni ngisho nokuwabona amaphutha ethu! IHubo 19:12 lithi: “Akekho okwaziyo ukubona amaphutha akhe.” (Today’s English Version) Osemusha okuthiwa uMatthew ukubeka kanje: “Awuphelele—futhi akukho muntu eMhlabeni ophelele. Uma ulindele ukuphelela kuwe ngokwakho, awusoze wajabula. . . . Yinto engenangqondo, yinto engenakwenzeka.”

Ucabanga ngalokho, kungani ungasebenzeli ekulungiseni eminye yemigomo yakho? Ngokwesibonelo, ingabe uzikhathaza ngokuzama ukwenza kahle ukubedlula bonke abanye kokwenzayo? IBhayibheli libonisa ukuthi empeleni umzamo onjalo okhandlayo ungase ubonakale “uyize nokulwela ukufica umoya.” (UmShumayeli 4:4) Iqiniso liwukuthi bambalwa abaphumelelayo ukuba ongqaphambili. Ngisho nalapho kwenzeka, ngokuvamile umuntu ukujabulela okwesikhashana nje bese kufika othile enze kangcono kunaye.

Umphostoli uPawulu weluleka: “Ngitshela wonke umuntu lapho phakathi kwenu ukuba angazicabangi emkhulu kunalokho okudingeke ukuba akucabange; kodwa acabange ukuze abe nengqondo ehluzekile.” (Roma 12:3) Yiba nengqondo! Lungisa imigomo yakho ibonise amakhono akho kanye nokulinganiselwa kwakho. Funa ukwenza kahle, kodwa musa ukufuna ukuphelela. Zibekele umgomo oqondile kodwa ofinyelelekayo.

Ngokwesibonelo, uPawulu wakhuthaza uThimothewu ukuba abe “isisebenzi esingenamahloni ngalutho, esiphatha izwi leqiniso ngokufanele.” (2 Thimothewu 2:15) Yebo, uPawulu wakhuthaza ubuhle, hhayi ukuphelela. Ngokufanayo, nawe zibekele imigomo enengqondo. Futhi uma ungaqiniseki ukuthi yikuphi ‘okunengqondo,’ xoxa nabazali bakho noma nomunye umuntu omdala omethembayo.

Abanye basikisela ngisho nokuba uzame ngamabomu ukwenza izinto ezithile ongenalo ikhono lazo, njengokufunda umdlalo othile omusha noma ukudlala insimbi ethile yomculo. Yebo, lapho ufunda okuthile okusha, awunakukugwema ukwenza amaphutha amaningi. Kodwa akulahlwa mbeleko ngokufelwa. Mhlawumbe kuyokusiza ukuba ubone ukuthi ukwenza amaphutha kumane nje kuyingxenye yenqubo yokufunda.

Kunoma yini ofuna ukuyifeza—kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukubhala indaba ethile esikoleni noma ukufunda ukudlala upiyano kahle—cabanga ngesinye iseluleko somphostoli uPawulu: “Ningavilaphi emsebenzini wenu.” (Roma 12:11) Yebo, ungahlehlisi izinto noma uzindele ukuzenza ngenxa nje yokuthi wesaba ukuthi zizokwehlula.

Omunye osemusha wayenomkhuba wokuhlehlisa ukwenza imisebenzi yesikole ngezaba zokuthi wayesazama “ukuhleleka.” Nakuba ukuhleleka komuntu siqu kuyinto enhle, qaphela ukuba kungabi yizaba zokuzindela. Le ntombazane yagcina isiqaphela ukuthi “lapho kumelwe ukhethe phakathi kokuletha umsebenzi wakho wesikole onganelisekile ngokuphelele ngawo nokungawulethi nhlobo, ngaso sonke isikhathi okungcono kakhulu ukuwuletha.”

Susa Imicabango Ekulimazayo!

Yebo, kungase kungehli kahle ukucabanga ngokwenza umsebenzi ozoba namaphutha. Kungenzeka ukuba imicabango egxekayo nemibi iphambane ekhanda lakho. Ungenzani? Iqiniso liwukuthi ukugxila emicabangweni emibi kuyalimaza, kunjengokuzigwaza ngowakho. Ngakho yenza umzamo oqotho wokuyisusa engqondweni yakho imicabango engenangqondo ngawe ngokwakho. Funda ukuhleka amaphutha akho. Kakade, kukhona “nesikhathi sokuhleka.” (UmShumayeli 3:4) Khumbula futhi ukuthi uJehova akayamukeli inhlamba—ngisho noma sizithuka thina.—Efesu 4:31.

Esikhundleni sokuzigxeka njalo, sebenzisa amazwi ezAga 11:17 athi: “Umuntu onomusa wothando uwuphatha ngendlela enomvuzo umphefumulo wakhe, kodwa umuntu onesihluku ulethela umzimba wakhe isigcwagcwa.” Ngakho cabanga ngalo mbuzo, Ingabe ukuba nezindinganiso eziphakeme ngokwedlulele kuye kwenza kwaba lula ngawe ukuba ube nabangane? Mhlawumbe akunjalo. Mhlawumbe uye wahlukana ngisho nanabantu abathile ngoba benamaphutha. Khona-ke, ungenzani?

Sebenzisa umyalo weBhayibheli: “Qhubekani nibekezelelana futhi nithethelelana ngokukhululekile uma umuntu enesizathu sokukhononda ngomunye.” (Kolose 3:13) Yebo, ngokuba nengqondo ngokwengeziwe kulokho okulindele kwabanye, uyokwenza kube lula ngokwengeziwe ukuba nabangane!

Ungase uzibuze, ‘Bayobe behlushwe yini abantu ukuthi bangaze bangigwemele ukulwela ukungenzi phutha?’ Nokho, cabangela imiphumela ukukhuluma ngemigomo ephakeme ozibekele yona okungaba nayo kwabanye. Incwadi ethi When Perfect Isn’t Good Enough iyachaza: “Ukukhononda ungaqedi noma nini lapho ungatholanga u-A esivivinyweni kungase kuzwakale kuwukubethuka abangane bakho abalwa kanzima ukuba bathole u-B noma u-C.” Ngakho sebenzela ukugwema ukuba nombono ophambene kanye nokuzicabangela wena wedwa. Abantu bayokuthola kumnandi kakhulu ukuba seduze kwakho.

UCarly osemncane uyayifingqa le ndaba lapho ethi: “Kuye kudingeke ukuba ngiwutshele ngokoqobo umuzwa wami wokufuna ukuphelela ukuba ushenxe.” Ungakwenza kanjani lokho? Zindla ngendlela uNkulunkulu azibheka ngayo izinto. Uma ukuthola kusenzima ukulawula ukucabanga kwakho kule ndaba, xoxa nabazali bakho noma nomKristu ovuthiwe ebandleni lakini. Thandaza kuNkulunkulu umcele akusize ukuba ushintshe ukucabanga kwakho. Umthandazo ungaba ithuluzi elinamandla lokulwa nokufuna ukuphelela.—IHubo 55:22; Filipi 4:6, 7.

Khumbula njalo ukuthi uJehova akafune kuphelela kithi; akulindele kithi ukuba sethembeke kuphela. (1 Korinte 4:2) Uma ulwela ukwethembeka, uyakwazi ukujabula ngempela ngalokho oyikho—yize ungaphelele.

Uma ungakujabulela ukuthola ukwaziswa okwengeziwe noma ungathanda ukuba othile akuvakashele ekhaya azokuqhubela isifundo seBhayibheli samahhala, siza ubhale, ufake igama lakho nekheli lendawo ohlala kuyo, ukuthumelele OFakazi BakaJehova, Private Bag X2067, Krugersdorp, 1740, South Africa, noma ekhelini elifanele ekhasini 5.

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Ukwesaba ukuthi uzohluleka kungakukhinyabeza

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Ukuzama ukufunda izinto ezintsha kungakusiza ufunde ukwamukela amaphutha