Indlela Yokusiza Labo Abanenkinga Yokukhathazeka
“Inhliziyo yami ivame ukushaya ngamandla, ngijuluke ngibe manzi té futhi ngiphefumule kanzima. Ngivele ngesabe, ngikhathazeke futhi ngidideke.”—U-Isabella, oseminyakeni engamashumi amane onenkinga yokuba novalo.
UUKUKHATHAZEKA kungachazwa ngokuthi “umuzwa wokuba novalo noma ixhala.” Ngokwesibonelo, wake wazizwa wethukile lapho ubhekene nenja ethukuthele? Yini eyenzekayo lapho leyo nja ikufulathela? Uvalo nokukhathazeka kuyaphela, akunjalo? Kodwa kuthiwani ngenkinga yokukhathazeka?
Lapho ukukhathazeka kuba amahlala khona, uma kuqhubeka ngisho noma kungasekho sizathu, kungaba inkinga yempilo. Ngokwe-U.S. National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), “inkinga yokukhathazeka ihlupha abantu baseMelika abangaba izigidi ezingu-40 abaneminyaka engu-18 kuya phezulu . . . unyaka ngamunye.” Cabanga ngo-Isabella, ocashunwe esethulweni. Ukukhathazeka okunganqamuki okufana nokwakhe, kungaba nemiphumela emibi kulowo ohlushwa yikho.
Akupheleli lapho, kodwa nomkhaya wakhe ungathinteka kabi. Nokho, likhona ithemba. Incwadi ekhishwa yi-NIMH ithi: “Zikhona izindlela eziphumelelayo zokwelapha inkinga yokukhathazeka, kanti ucwaningo luvumbulula izindlela ezintsha ezingasiza abantu abaningi abanale nkinga ukuba baphile ukuphila okuphumelelayo nokwanelisayo.”
Umkhaya nabangane nabo bangamsiza umuntu onale nkinga. Kanjani?
Indlela Yokusiza
Msekeleni: UMonica, ohlushwa ukukhathazeka okuvamile nokucindezeleka kwangemva kwesenzakalo esibuhlungu, uchaza inkinga abhekene nayo: “Abantu abaningi bakuthola kunzima ukuqonda izinkinga zami ezingokomzwelo.”
Ngenxa yalokho, abanenkinga yokukhathazeka bavame ukwesaba kakhulu ukuthi abantu bangase bangabaqondi, ngakho bazama ukuyifihla inkinga yabo. Lokhu kungaphumela ekubeni nomuzwa wecala owenza imizwelo yabo ibe sesimweni esibi nakakhulu. Ngakho-ke, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba umkhaya nabangane bamsekele ogulayo.
Funda okwengeziwe ngale nkinga: Lokhu kusikisela kungafaneleka ngokukhethekile kulabo abasebenzelana eduze nabanenkinga yokukhathazeka. Laba bangahlanganisa ilungu lomkhaya noma umngane oseduze ngokukhethekile.
Qhubekani niduduzana: Isithunywa sevangeli sekhulu lokuqala uPawulu sakhuthaza abangane emzini waseGrisi iThesalonika ukuba ‘baqhubeke beduduzana futhi bakhana.’ (1 Thesalonika 5:11) Lokhu singakwenza ngamazwi nangesimo sezwi lethu. Kudingeka sibonise ukuthi sibakhathalela ngokujulile abangane bethu futhi kudingeka sigweme amazwi alimazayo.
Cabanga ngalabo abathathu ababethi bangabangane bakaJobe, okuqanjwe ngaye incwadi yeBhayibheli. Njengoba kungenzeka uyakhumbula, lawo madoda agudlisela ngokungeyikho ukuthi ngandlela-thile, uJobe wayefihla izono azenze ekusithekeni nokuthi ukuhlupheka kwakhe kwakungenxa yokuzifihla kwakhe.
Ngakho, cabangela imizwa yogulayo. Lalelisisa. Zama ukubheka izinto ngeso lakhe kunokuzibheka ngendlela yakho. Gwema ukufinyelela iziphetho njengoba ulalele. Abangane mbumbulu bakaJobe benze njalo, futhi ngenxa yalokho babizwa ngokuthi “abaduduzi abayinkathazo.” Empeleni bamenza wazizwa kabi nakakhulu!—Jobe 16:2.
Khumbula ukubalalela ngokucophelela abanale nkinga yempilo. Bavumele bayiveze ngokukhululekile imizwa yabo. Lokhu kungakusiza usiqonde kangcono isimo ababhekene naso. Cabanga nje ukuthi ungaba yini umvuzo walokho! Ungakwazi ukusiza abanale nkinga bajabulele ukuphila okugcwele nokunenjongo kakhudlwana.
[Ibhokisi/Isithombe ekhasini 27]
Ukuqonda Izinhlobo Zezinkinga Zokukhathazeka
Kubalulekile ukuziqonda izinkinga zokukhathazeka, ikakhulu uma zithinta amalungu omkhaya noma abangane abakhulu. Cabangela izinhlobo ezinhlanu zalezi zinkinga.
Inkinga Yokushaywa Uvalo Cabanga ngo-Isabella, okukhulunywe ngaye esethulweni salesi sihloko. Akukhona ukuhlaselwa ukukhathazeka kuphela okumthena amandla. Uthi, “Ngezikhathi lapho uvalo lusathe dwe, uyesaba ukuthi luzophinde lukuhlasele futhi.” Ngenxa yalokho, abanale nkinga bavame ukuzigwema izindawo abaye bahlaselwa uvalo bekuzo. Abanye bagcina bengasaphumi endlini noma bakwazi ukubhekana nezimo abazesabayo kuphela uma behamba nomuntu abamethembayo. U-Isabella wachaza: “Ukuba wedwa nje kwanele ukukwenza uhlaselwe uvalo. Ngizizwa ngivikelekile uma nginomama; angikwazi ukubhekana nalo uma engekho eduze.”
Inkinga Yokukhathazeka Okuhambisana Nezenzo Ezingalawuleki Umuntu okhathazeka kakhulu ngamagciwane noma ukungcola angase abe nomkhuba oweqisayo wokugeza izandla njalo. Ngokuphathelene nale nkinga, uRenan uthi: “Ingqondo yami ihlale ikhathazekile njengoba ngilokhu ngicabanga ngamaphutha esikhathi esidlule, ngilokhu ngiwahlaziya futhi ngiwaphenduphendula.” Umphumela uba ukuhlale etshela abanye ngalawo maphutha. URenan uhlale edinga ukuqinisekiswa. Kodwa imithi yokwelapha iye yasiza ekulawuleni inkinga yakhe yokweqisa.a
Ukucindezeleka Kwangemva Kwesenzakalo Esibuhlungu Muva nje le nkulumo iye yasetshenziselwa ukuchaza izimpawu ezihlukahlukene zokuphazamiseka kwengqondo abantu ababa nazo ngemva kwesehlakalo esethusayo esihilela ukulimala ngokomzimba noma ukusongelwa yikho. Abantu abaningi abanale nkinga, bangase bethuswe wubala, bacasuke, babe ndikindiki ngokomzwelo, baphelelwe isithakazelo ezintweni ababezijabulela futhi bahluleke ukuthanda abanye abantu—ikakhulu labo ababekade besondelene nabo. Abanye baba nolaka ngisho nobudlova, futhi bavama ukuzigwema izimo ezibakhumbuza ngesehlakalo sokuqala esabethusa kakhulu.
Ukwesaba Ukuba Phakathi Kwabantu Le nkulumo ichaza abantu abakhathazeka ngokweqile nababa namahloni ngokwedlulele njalo lapho bephakathi kwabantu. Abanye abanale nkinga bahlale benokwesaba okukhulu nokuphikelelayo kokubukwa nokwahlulelwa abanye abantu. Kungase kuphele izinsuku noma amasonto bekhathazekile uma bezokuya emkhosini othile. Ukwesaba kwabo kungaba kukhulu kangangokuba kungabaphazamisa emsebenzini, esikoleni nakweminye imisebenzi evamile futhi kube nzima ukwakha abangane nokubalondoloza.
Ukukhathazeka Okuvamile UMonica okukhulunywe ngaye ekuqaleni unale nkinga. “Ukhathazeka ngokweqile” usuku lonke, ngisho noma kukuncane noma kungekho nhlobo okufanele kumkhathaze. Abanale nkinga bavame ukulindela inhlekelele futhi bakhathazeka ngokweqile ngezinkinga zempilo, imali, izinkinga zomkhaya noma ubunzima ababhekana nabo emsebenzini. Umcabango nje wokuthi liyoshona nini ilanga ungabenza bakhathazeke.b
[Imibhalo yaphansi]
a Alukho uhlobo olukhethekile lwezokwelapha olutuswa i-Phaphama!
b Ukwaziswa okungenhla kusekelwe encwadini ekhishwa i-National Institute of Mental Health of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
[Isithombe ekhasini 26]
‘Qhubekani niduduzana’