Ukufundisa Ingane Yakho Ngocansi

INSELELE

Emashumini eminyaka ambalwa edlule, abazali babenethuba elikahle lokuba abokuqala ukuxoxa nendodana noma nendodakazi yabo ngocansi. Futhi babengakwazi ukuchaza izinto kancane kancane, kuye ngokweminyaka nezidingo zengane.

Sekushintshile konke lokho. Incwadi ethi The Lolita Effect ithi: “Imiyalezo ephathelene nocansi isitholakala kalula ezinganeni ezineminyaka ephansi kakhulu, kanti ngisho nemithombo yokwaziswa yezingane iya iba nokuningi okuphathelene nocansi.” Ingabe lokhu kuyazisiza izingane noma kuyazilimaza?

OKUFANELE UKWAZI

Ukwaziswa okuyingcaca ngocansi kuthe chithi saka. Encwadini yakhe ethi Talk to Me First, uDeborah Roffman uthi, “izingxoxo, izikhangiso, ama-movie, izincwadi, umculo, izinhlelo ze-TV, imiyalezo ebhalwayo, imidlalo, amabhodi amakhulu okukhangisa namaskrini amafoni nawama-computer agcwele izithombe, ulimi nokunye okusikisela ucansi kangangokuthi [intsha nezingane] eziningi, zinganakile zingaphetha ngokuthi . . . ayikho enye into ebaluleke ukudlula ucansi.”

Ezokuthengisa zinesandla kule nkinga. Abakhangisi nabathengisi badayisa izingubo zezingane zokugqoka ezikhangayo ngokocansi, beziqeqeshela ukunaka ngokungadingekile indlela yokubukeka zisencane. Incwadi ethi So Sexy So Soon ithi: “Abathengisi bayabazi ubuthaka bezingane, futhi bayasizakala ngabo. Zonke lezi zithombe zocansi nemikhiqizo akuhloselwe ukufundisa izingane ngocansi kodwa injongo iwukuzidayisela imikhiqizo.”

Ulwazi alwanele. Njengoba nje kunomehluko phakathi kokwazi ukuthi imoto isebenza kanjani nokuba umshayeli okahle, kunomehluko phakathi kokuba nolwazi ngocansi nokusebenzisa lolo lwazi ukuze wenze izinqumo ezihlakaniphile.

Iphuzu eliyinhloko: Namuhla, kunanini ngaphambili, kudingeka usize izingane zakho ziqeqeshe ‘amandla azo okuqonda’ ukuze zikwazi “ukuhlukanisa kokubili okulungile nokungalungile.”—Hebheru 5:14.

ONGAKWENZA

Thatha isinyathelo. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kulukhuni kangakanani, ukukhuluma nezingane zakho ngocansi kuwumthwalo wakho. Wamukele.—Isimiso seBhayibheli: IzAga 22:6.

Yiba nezingxoxo ezimfushane. Esikhundleni sokuba nengxoxo eyodwa ende ngocansi, sebenzisa amathuba avelayo, mhlawube lapho nihamba nobabili emotweni noma lapho nenza umsebenzi wasendlini ndawonye. Ukuze usize ingane yakho ikhululeke, buza imibuzo edinga imibono yayo. Ngokwesibonelo, esikhundleni sokuthi, “Wena uyazithanda yini izikhangiso ezinje?” ungase uthi, “Uma ucabanga, kungani abakhangisi besebenzisa izithombe ezinje ukuze badayise imikhiqizo yabo?” Ngemva kwempendulo yayo, ungase ubuze, “Wena, uzizwa kanjani ngalokho?”—Isimiso seBhayibheli: Duteronomi 6:6, 7.

Gcina ingxoxo ilingana neminyaka yengane. Izingane ezifunda enkulisa zingafundiswa amagama ayiwonawona ezitho zobulili, nokuthi zingazivikela kanjani kulabo abahlukumeza ngokocansi. Njengoba zikhula, izingane zingafundiswa amaqiniso ayisisekelo ngenqubo yokuzalana. Lapho sezisesikhathini sokuthomba, kumelwe zibe seziyiqonda ngokugcwele indaba yokuziphatha nocansi.

Gxilisa izindinganiso zokuziphatha. Qala ukufundisa ingane yakho—isencane—ngokwethembeka, ubuqotho nenhlonipho. Lapho senixoxa ngocansi, usuke usunesisekelo ongakhela kuso. Okunye, ziveze ngokucacile izindinganiso zakho zokuziphatha. Ngokwesibonelo, uma ukuya ocansini ngaphambi kokushada ukubheka njengento embi, yitshele. Yibe usuchaza ukuthi kungani kukubi futhi kulimaza. Incwadi ethi Beyond the Big Talk ithi: “Intsha ethi iyazi ukuthi abazali bayo abathandi ukuba abantu abasebasha baye ocansini inamathuba amancane okuya ocansini.”

Yiba isibonelo. Phila ngezindinganiso zokuziphatha ozifundisayo. Ngokwesibonelo, ingabe uhlekiswa amahlaya angcolile, ugqoka ngendlela evusa inkanuko noma udlala ngothando? Izenzo ezinjalo zingakululaza lokho ozama ukukufundisa izingane zakho.—Isimiso seBhayibheli: Roma 2:21.

Gcina ingxoxo yakha. Ucansi luyisipho esivela kuNkulunkulu, futhi lapho lujatshulelwa ngaphansi kwezimo ezifanele—emshadweni—lungaba umthombo wenjabulo enkulu. (IzAga 5:18, 19) Yenza ingane yakho iqonde ukuthi ngesikhathi esifanele nayo ingakwazi ukusijabulela lesi sipho, ngaphandle kobuhlungu benhliziyo nokukhathazeka okuhambisana nokuya ocansini ngaphambi kokushada.—1 Thimothewu 1:18, 19.