Fundisa Ingane Yakho Ukuba Ibe Nokuthula
Ejabule ngokuthi umkhaya wakubo uthuthela kwenye indawo ekude, uNicole oneminyaka engu-8 wayehlale exoxela umngane wakhe omkhulu uGabrielle ngakho konke okwenziwayo. Ngolunye usuku, kungazelelwe uGabrielle watshela uNicole ngolaka ukuthi akanandaba nokuhamba kwakhe. Ephatheke kabi kakhulu futhi ethukuthele, uNicole watshela unina, “Angisamfuni uGabrielle.”
IZINGXABANO zobuntwana ezinjengekaNicole noGabrielle ngokuvamile kudingeka zingenelwe abazali—hhayi nje ukuze baduduze kodwa futhi ukuze babonise indlela yokulungisa lezo zindaba. Ngokwemvelo izingane zibonisa “izici zobungane,” futhi zivame ukungaqapheli ukuthi ezikushoyo nezikwenzayo kungadala umonakalo. (1 Korinte 13:11) Zidinga usizo ukuze zibe nezimfanelo ezingazenza zibe nobuhlobo obunokuthula nabanye ekhaya nakwezinye izindawo.
Abazali abangamaKristu banesithakazelo esijulile sokuqeqesha izingane zabo ukuba ‘zifune ukuthula zikuphishekele.’ (1 Petru 3:11) Injabulo etholakala ngokuba umenzi wokuthula iwufanele wonke umzamo odingekayo ukuze sinqobe imizwa yokusola abanye, ukukhungatheka nobutha. Uma ungumzali, ungazifundisa kanjani izingane zakho ukuba zibe nokuthula?
Yakha Isifiso Sokujabulisa “UNkulunkulu Wokuthula”
UJehova ubizwa ngokuthi “uNkulunkulu wokuthula” futhi kuthiwa ‘unika ukuthula.’ (Filipi 4:9; Roma 15:33) Ngakho, abazali abahlakaniphile balisebenzisa ngobuciko iZwi likaNkulunkulu, iBhayibheli, ukuze bagxilise ezinganeni zabo isifiso sokujabulisa uNkulunkulu nokulingisa izimfanelo zakhe. Ngokwesibonelo, siza izingane zakho ukuba zibone ngeso lengqondo lokho umphostoli uJohane akubona embonweni omangalisayo—uthingo oluhle kakhulu oluluhlaza okwesimaragidu luzungeze isihlalo sobukhosi sikaJehova.a (IsAmbulo 4:2, 3) Chaza ukuthi lolu thingo lufanekisela ukuthula nokuzola okuzungeze uJehova nokuthi lezo zibusiso uyozinika bonke abamlalelayo.
UJehova unikeza nesiqondiso ngeNdodana yakhe, uJesu, ebizwa ngokuthi “iSikhulu Sokuthula.” (Isaya 9:6, 7) Ngakho, funda futhi uxoxe nezingane zakho ngokulandisa kweBhayibheli lapho uJesu afundisa khona izifundo eziwusizo ngokugwema izimpi nezingxabano. (Mathewu 26:51-56; Marku 9:33-35) Chaza isizathu esenza ukuba uPawulu, ngaphambili ‘owayengumuntu oweyisayo,’ ashintshe izindlela zakhe futhi abhale ukuthi “inceku yeNkosi akufanele ilwe, kunalokho kufanele ibe mnene kubo bonke, . . . izibambe ngaphansi kobubi.” (1 Thimothewu 1:13; 2 Thimothewu 2:24) Ukusabela kwengane yakho kungase kukumangaze futhi kukujabulise.
Lapho eneminyaka engu-7, u-Evan ukhumbula egconwa umfana besebhasini lesikole. Uthi: “Ngamthukuthelela kakhulu lowo mfana kangangokuthi ngangifuna ukuziphindiselela! Ngabe sengikhumbula isifundo engasifunda ekhaya mayelana nalabo abazama ukuqala izimpi. Ngangazi ukuthi uJehova ufuna ‘ngingabuyiseli muntu okubi ngokubi’ nokuba ‘ngibe nokuthula nabantu bonke.’” (Roma 12:17, 18) U-Evan wabe esethola amandla nesibindi sokudambisa lesi simo esishubile ngokusabela ngomoya ophansi. Wayefuna ukujabulisa uNkulunkulu wokuthula.
Yiba Umzali Onokuthula
Ingabe umuzi wakho uyindawo eheleza ukuthula? Uma kunjalo, izingane zakho zingafunda okuningi ngokuthula ngisho nalapho ungasho lutho. Ukuphumelela kwakho ekufundiseni izingane zakho ukuba nokuthula kuncike kakhulu ezingeni wena olingisa ngalo izindlela zokuthula zikaNkulunkulu nezikaKristu.—Roma 2:21.
URuss noCindy bayazikhandla ukuze baqeqeshe amadodana abo amabili, bewakhuthaza ukuba abonise uthando lapho abanye bewacasula. UCindy uthi, “Isimo sengqondo esisibonisayo kubafana bethu nakwabanye lapho kuphakama isimo esinzima sinendima enkulu endleleni amadodana ethu azisingatha ngayo izimo ezifanayo.”
Ngisho nalapho wenza iphutha—ngoba akekho umzali ongalenzi iphutha—usengalisebenzisa lelo thuba ukuze ufundise izifundo ezibalulekile. UStephen uyavuma: “Kwakuba nezikhathi lapho mina nomkami, uTerry, sasithatha ngamawala futhi sijezise izingane zethu ezintathu singakawezwa wonke amaqiniso. Sasixolisa uma senze kanjalo.” UTerry uyanezela: “Sasizitshela izingane zethu ukuthi nathi asiphelele futhi siyawenza amaphutha. Sinomuzwa wokuthi lokhu akuzange nje kwenze umkhaya wethu ube nokuthula kodwa kwasiza nezingane ukuba zifunde indlela yokuphishekela ukuthula.”
Ingabe abantabakho bafunda ukuba nokuthula ngokubheka indlela obaphatha ngayo? UJesu wayala: “Ngakho-ke, zonke izinto enifuna abantu bazenze kini, nani kumelwe nizenze ngokufanayo kubo.” (Mathewu 7:12) Naphezu kwamaphutha owenzayo, qiniseka ukuthi uthando olubonisa izingane zakho luyoveza imiphumela emihle. Izingane zakho ziyolalela kalula lapho uzinikeza isiqondiso ngothando.
Phuza Ukuthukuthela
IzAga 19:11 zithi: “Ukuqondisisa komuntu ngokuqinisekile kubambezela intukuthelo yakhe.” Ungazisiza kanjani izingane zakho ukuba zihlakulele lokho kuqondisisa? UDavid uchaza indlela esebenzayo yena nomkakhe, uMariann, abayithola iwusizo endodaneni nasendodakazini yabo. Uthi: “Lapho zicasulwa othile osho noma enze okuthile okuziphatha kabi, sizisiza ukuba zibe nobubele. Sizibuza imibuzo elula, enjengokuthi, ‘Ingabe lowo muntu ubenosuku olunzima? Kungenzeka yini ukuthi unomhobholo? Ingabe uphathwe kabi omunye umuntu?’” UMariann uyanezela, “Lokhu kuvame ukuzenza zizole kunokuba kuzenze zihlale zicabanga ngezinto ezimbi noma ziphikisane ngokuthi ubani owenze iphutha nongalenzanga.”
Ukuqeqesha okunjalo kungaveza imiphumela emangalisayo. Phawula indlela uNicole, okukhulunywe ngaye ekuqaleni kwalesi sihloko, asizwa ngayo unina, uMichelle, ukuba enze okungaphezu kokulungisa ukungezwani phakathi kwakhe nomngane wakhe uGabrielle. UMichelle uthi: “Mina noNicole safunda isahluko 14 sencwadi ethi Funda KuMfundisi Omkhulu.b Ngabe sengichaza okwakushiwo uJesu lapho ethi kufanele sithethelele omunye ‘kuze kube izikhathi ezingamashumi ayisikhombisa nesikhombisa.’ Ngemva kokulalelisisa uNicole eveza imizwa yakhe, ngamsiza ukuba akuzwe ukudabuka nokukhungatheka kukaGabrielle ngoba umngane wakhe omkhulu wayezohamba ayohlala kude.”—Mathewu 18:21, 22.
Ukuqondisisa kukaNicole okusha ngalokho okungenzeka kwaholela ekuphahlukeni kukaGabrielle kwamsiza ukuba abe nobubele futhi kwamshukumisela ukuba ashayele uGabrielle ucingo ukuze axolise. UMichelle uthi: “Kusukela ngaleso sikhathi, uNicole uthola injabulo ngokucabangela imizwa yabanye nangokwenzela abanye izinto ezinhle ezibenza bazizwe kangcono.”—Filipi 2:3, 4.
Siza izingane zakho ukuba zigweme ukucasulwa amaphutha abanye nokungaboni ngaso linye. Mhlawumbe uzothola ukwaneliseka ngokubona izingane zakho ziphatha abanye kahle zibabonise nothando.—Roma 12:10; 1 Korinte 12:25.
Khuthaza Ubuhle Bokuthethelela
IzAga 19:11 zithi: “Kungubuhle . . . ukweqa isiphambeko.” Ngesikhathi esibuhlungu kunazo zonke, uJesu walingisa uYise futhi wabonisa isimo sengqondo sokuthethelela. (Luka 23:34) Izingane zakho zingafunda ubuhle bokuthethelela lapho zizizwela mathupha ubumnandi bokuthethelelwa nguwe uma zonile.
Ngokwesibonelo, uWilly oneminyaka emihlanu ubudala uyakuthanda ukufaka imibala ezithombeni nogogo wakhe. Ngesinye isikhathi, ugogo wakhe wavele wayeka ukufaka imibala, wathethisa uWilly wayesehamba. UWilly wakhathazeka. Uyise, uSam, wathi: “Ugogo kaWilly uphethwe i-Alzheimer [ukuwohloka kwamangqamuzana obuchopho]. Ngakho samchazela lokhu uWilly ngendlela ayezoyiqonda.” Ngemva kokukhumbuza uWilly ukuthi wayethethelelwe izikhathi eziningana nokuthi kufanele enze okufanayo kwabanye, uSam wamangala ngokusabela kukaWilly. USam uthi: “Ungayicabanga yini indlela mina nomkami esazizwa ngayo lapho sibuka indodana yethu encane iya kugogo wayo oneminyaka engu-80 ubudala, ixolisa ngezwi eliphansi, futhi imbamba ngesandla bebuyela etafuleni?”
Kungubuhle ngempela lapho izingane zifunda ‘ukuqhubeka zibekezelela’ amaphutha abanye futhi zibathethelela. (Kolose 3:13) Ngisho nalapho abantu benza izinto ezicasulayo ngamabomu, qinisekisa ingane yakho ukuthi ukusabela ngendlela ebonisa ukuthula kungaba namandla, ngoba “lapho uJehova ejabula ngezindlela zomuntu wenza ngisho nezitha zakhe zibe nokuthula naye.”—IzAga 16:7.
Qhubeka Usiza Ingane Yakho Ukuba Ibe Nokuthula
Lapho abazali besebenzisa iZwi likaNkulunkulu ekufundiseni izingane zabo “ngaphansi kwezimo zokuthula” futhi beba ‘yilabo abenza ukuthula,’ baba isibusiso ngempela ezinganeni zabo. (Jakobe 3:18) Abazali abanjalo bahlomisa izingane zabo ngalokho ezikudingayo ukuze zixazulule izingxabano futhi zibe nokuthula. Lokhu kunezela kakhulu enjabulweni nasekwanelisekeni eziyoba nakho konke ukuphila kwazo.
UDan noKathy banezingane ezintathu ezevile eminyakeni eyishumi nambili, zonke eziqhuba kahle ngokomoya. UDan uthi: “Nakuba kwakunezinselele ekuziqeqesheni ngenkathi zisezincane, siyajabula ngokuthi izingane zethu zakhula zaba abantu abakahle. Manje zinokuthula nabanye, futhi zibathethelela ngokukhululekile abanye lapho okuthile kusongela ukuthula.” UKathy uthi, “Lokhu kusikhuthaza kakhulu, njengoba ukuthula kungesinye sezithelo zomoya kaNkulunkulu.”—Galathiya 5:22, 23.
Ngakho, njengabazali abangamaKristu kunengqondo ukuba ‘ningayeki ukwenza okuhle’ futhi ‘ningakhathali’ ukufundisa izingane zenu ukuba ziphile ngokuthula—ngisho noma intuthuko ingase ibonakale incane ekuqaleni. Njengoba nenza lokhu, qinisekani ukuthi “uNkulunkulu wothando nokuthula uyoba nani.”—Galathiya 6:9; 2 Korinte 13:11.
[Imibhalo yaphansi]
a Bheka isithombe esisekhasini 75 sencwadi IsAmbulo—Umvuthwandaba Waso Omkhulu Useduze! enyatheliswa oFakazi BakaJehova.
b Inyatheliswa oFakazi BakaJehova.
[Ibhokisi/Isithombe ekhasini 20]
INGABE IYITHONYA ELIHLE?
Indaba eyanyatheliswa i-Media Awareness Network enesihloko esithi “Ubudlova Kwezokuzijabulisa” ithi: “Ezokuzijabulisa zigcizelela umqondo wokusetshenziswa kobudlova ukuze kuxazululwe inkinga lapho kokubili amashinga namaqhawe esebenzisa ubudlova njalo.” Imiphumela eyingozi yobudlova yaboniswa amaphesenti angaba yishumi kuphela ezinhlelo ze-TV, amabhayisikobho nama-video omculo okwahlaziywa. Kunalokho, le ndaba ithi, “ubudlova babuvezwa njengobufanele, obuvamile nobungenakuvinjelwa—njengendlela esobala kunazo zonke yokuxazulula inkinga.”
Ingabe uyasibona isidingo sokulungisa mayelana nokubukwa kwe-TV ekhaya lakho? Ungavumeli ezokuzijabulisa ukuba zishabalalise imizamo yakho yokufundisa izingane zakho ukuba zibe nokuthula.
[Isithombe ekhasini 17]
Gxilisa ezinganeni zakho isifiso sokujabulisa “uNkulunkulu wokuthula”
[Isithombe ekhasini 18]
Zinike isikhathi sokulungisa amazwi nezenzo ezilimazayo
[Isithombe ekhasini 19]
Izingane zakho kufanele zifunde ukuxolisa nokuthethelela