Yini Okufanele Ngiyazi Ngokuhlukunyezwa Ngokobulili?—Ingxenye 1: Izinyathela zokukugwema

Kuyini ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili?

Nakuba izincazelo ezingokomthetho zingafani kuye ngezindawo, “ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili” kungabhekisela ekuthintweni izitho zangasese ube ungafuni, ngezinye izikhathi kusetshenziswa ukuphoqwa ngenkani. Kungahilela izinto ezifana nokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili kwezingane noma kwabasanda kweva eminyakeni eyishumi nambili, ukulala nesihlobo, ukudlwengulwa, nokuxhashazwa ngokobulili ngumuntu “okumelwe ngabe uyakusiza”​—mhlawumbe udokotela, uthisha, noma umfundisi. Ezinye izisulu, okungenzeka zihlukunyezwa ngamazwi noma ngokomzimba, zisatshiswa ngokuthi uma zike zabika, kukhona okuzozivelela.

Ngokwalokho okuboniswa enye inhlolo-vo, e-United States nje kuphela, unyaka ngamunye, bangaphezu kuka-250000 abantu ababika ukuthi bahlukunyezwe ngokobulili. Abangaphezu kwesigamu kubo baneminyaka ephakathi kuka-12 no-18.

Okufanele Ukwazi

• IBhayibheli liyakulahla ukuhlukumeza ngokobulili. IBhayibheli lilandisa ngesixuku esasihlanyiswa ubulili esasifuna ukudlwengula amadoda amabili ayevakashele umuzi waseSodoma eminyakeni engu-4000 edlule​—isenzakalo esakwenza kwacaca ukuthi kungani uJehova awubhubhisa lowo muzi. (Genesise 19:4-13) Ngaphezu kwalokho, uMthetho owawunikwe uMose eminyakeni engaba ngu-3500 edlule, wawukwenqabela ukulala nesihlobo, kanye nokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili kwelungu lomndeni.​—Levitikusi 18:6.

• Ngokuvamile, umuntu uhlukunyezwa umuntu amaziyo. Incwadi ethi Talking Sex With Your Kids ithi, “Abantu ababili kwabathathu abadlwengulwayo basuke bemazi umuntu obadlwengulile. Kusuke kungeyena umuntu abangamazi ovele nje waqhamuka kungazelelwe.”

• Ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili kwehlela kokubili abesilisa nabesifazane. E-United States, amaphesenti angaba yishumi ezisulu, angabantu besilisa. Ngokusho kwe-Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN), izisulu ezingabantu besilisa “zingaba nomuzwa wokwesaba ukuthi ukuhlukunyezwa kuzozenza ongqingili” noma zibe nomuzwa wokuthi “azisesiwona ‘amadoda aphelele.’”

• Akumangazi ukuthi ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili sekuvame kangaka. IBhayibheli labikezela ukuthi “ezinsukwini zokugcina” abantu abaningi bayokuba “abangenalo uthando” babe “abanolaka” baphinde babe “abangenakho ukuzithiba.” (2 Thimothewu 3:1-3) Lezo zici zibonakala ngokucacile kulabo abazama ukuhlukumeza abanye ngokobulili.

• Ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili akulona iphutha lalowo obe isisulu. Akekho umuntu okufanelekelayo ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili. Yilowo ohlukumezayo kuphela okufanele abekwe icala ngakwenzile. Noma kunjalo, ungakwazi ukuthatha izinyathelo zokunciphisa amathuba okuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili.

Ongakwenza

• Zilungiselele. Kwazi kusengaphambili oyokwenza uma umuntu​—ngisho nothandana naye noma isihlobo—ezama ukukuphoqelela ukuba nenze into engafanele. Intokazi okuthiwa ngu-Erin itusa ukuba uzilungiselele noma yiluphi uhlobo lokucindezela kontanga ngokulingisa izimo ezingase zivele, bese unquma ukuthi uyosabela kanjani ngaphansi kwalezo zimo. Uthi: “Kungabonakala kuyisidala, kodwa uma usubhekene naleso simo kuyawanciphisa amathuba okuba yisisulu.”

  IBhayibheli lithi: “Qaphelisisani ukuthi indlela enihamba ngayo ayinjengeyabantu abangahlakaniphile kodwa injengeyabahlakaniphileyo, . . . ngoba izinsuku zimbi.”—Efesu 5:15, 16.

  Zibuze: ‘Ngingenzenjani uma umuntu engangithinta ngendlela engingayithandi?’

• Yiba nendlela yokuphuma oyihlelile. I-RAINN itusa ukuba “kube negama elithile eliyimfihlo elaziwa abangane bakho noma umndeni wakho, ukuze kuthi uma uzizwa ungakhululekile ubathinte ngocingo bese usebenzisa lelo gama ukuze ubatshele ukuthi kukhona okungalungile, ngaphandle kokuba umuntu onaye azi. Abangane noma abomndeni wakho bangase beze bazokulanda noma benze indlela yokuthi ukwazi ukuphunyuka.” Ungagwema ukuzibangela usizi ngokungazifaki ezimweni eziyingozi.

  IBhayibheli lithi: “Unokuqonda lowo oboné inhlekelele wabe esecasha, kodwa abangenalwazi baye badlula ngakuyo futhi kumelwe bakhokhe.”—IzAga 22:3.

  Zibuze: ‘Yiziphi izindlela zokuphuma engizihlelile?’

  

• Beka imingcele​—unamathele kuyo. Ngokwesibonelo, uma uthandana nothile, kumelwe nobabili nixoxe ngokuthi yikuphi ukuziphatha okufanelekayo nokungafaneleki. Uma umuntu othandana naye ecabanga ukuthi ukubeka imingcele akusile, kusho ukuthi kumelwe uthole omunye umuntu​—ozohlonipha izindinganiso zakho.

  IBhayibheli lithi: “Uthando . . . aluziphathi ngokuhlazisayo, aluzifuneli izinzuzo zalo siqu.”​—1 Korinte 13:4, 5.

  Zibuze: ‘Ziyini izindinganiso zami? Yikuphi ukuziphatha okweqa umngcele walokho okufanelekayo?’