INTSHA IYABUZA
Ngingayigwema Kanjani Imicabango Engemihle?
Uzibheka njengomuntu onjani?
Ukuba nombono omuhle
“Ngizama ukuhlala ngijabulile futhi ngibeke umoya phansi. Zonke izinsuku ngizama ukumomotheka nokuhlala ngijabule.”—UValerie.
Ukuba nombono ongemuhle
“Lapho kwenzeka okuhle, okufika kuqala engqondweni yami ukuthi kuzolandela okubi—kuba sengathi lokho okuhle kuyiphupho noma kuyiphutha.”—URebecca
Bhekana namaqiniso
“Lapho ngilindele okuhle ngiyadumazeka uma izinto zingahambi ngendlela ebengiyilindele kanti uma nginombono ongemuhle ngizohlale ngingajabule. Ukubhekana namaqiniso kungisiza ngibheke izinto njengoba zinjalo.”—U-Anna.
Kungani kubalulekile?
IBhayibheli lithi “onenhliziyo ejabulayo uhlale enedili.” (IzAga 15:15) Ngokusobala, abantu abagwema imicabango engemihle engenasidingo nababheka okuhle ekuphileni bavame ukujabula. Bangase benze nabangani abengeziwe. Sonke siyavuma ukuthi asithandi ukuchitha isikhathi nomuntu ohlale ehlinile.
Noma kunjalo, nabantu abanombono omuhle kunamaqiniso okudingeka babhekane nawo ekuphileni. Ngokwesibonelo:
Izindaba zingase zigcwale imibiko yezimpi, ubuphekula noma ubugebengu.
Kungase kudingeke ubhekane nezinkinga emndenini wakini.
Ngokungangabazeki nawe unawakho amaphutha nobuthakathaka okudingeka ulwe nakho.
Kungenzeka umngani wakho uke washo noma wenza into ekuzwisa ubuhlungu.
Kunokuba uzizibe lezi zinto—noma ugxile kuzo uze uzizwe ungajabule—zama ukulinganisela ngokubhekana namaqiniso. Ukubhekana namaqiniso kuzokusiza ugweme imicabango engemihle futhi wamukele izimo njengoba zinjalo ngaphandle kokuba zikuqede amandla.
Ungakwazi ukumelana nezivunguvungu ekuphileni, uqiniseka ngokuthi zizodlula
Ongakwenza
Hlale unombono ofanele ngamaphutha akho.
IBhayibheli lithi: “Akukho muntu emhlabeni owenza okulungile ngaso sonke isikhathi futhi ongalokothi enze iphutha.” (UmShumayeli 7:20, Good News Translation) Iqiniso lokuthi uyawenza amaphutha libonisa ukuthi ungumuntu, alibonisi ukuthi uyisehluleki.
Indlela yokubhekana namaqiniso: Sebenzela ukuwalungisa amaphutha akho kodwa ungalindeli okungaphezu kwamandla akho. Insizwa okuthiwa uCaleb ithi: “Ngizama ukungagxili emaphutheni ami. Kunalokho, ngiyafunda kuwo ukuze ngibone izindlela engingathuthuka ngazo.”
Gwema ukuziqhathanisa nabanye.
IBhayibheli lithi: “Masingabi abazazisayo, sibhebhezela ukuncintisana, sifelana umona.” (Galathiya 5:26) Ukubuka izithombe ezifakwa abanye ezinkundleni zokuxhumana zemibuthano ongamenywanga kuyo kungakuphatha kabi. Kungenza abangani osondelene nabo babonakale beyizitha zakho ezinkulu.
Indlela yokubhekana namaqiniso: Kwamukele ukuthi ngeke umenywe kuyo yonke imibuthano. Ngaphandle kwalokho, izithombe ezifakwa ezinkundleni zokuxhumana aziyixoxi yonke indaba. Osemusha okuthiwa u-Alexis uthi: “Izinkundla zokuxhumana zivame ukubonisa kuphela izikhathi zokujabula ekuphileni kwabantu, hhayi ukuphila kwabo kwansuku zonke.”
Yiba umenzi wokuthula—ikakhulukazi emndenini wakini.
IBhayibheli lithi: ‘Uma kungenzeka, ngokusemandleni [akho], yiba nokuthula nabo bonke abantu.’ (Roma 12:18) Ngeke ukwazi ukulawula izinto ezenziwa abanye kodwa ungakwazi ukulawula indlela osabela ngayo. Ungakhetha ukwenza kube nokuthula.
Indlela yokubhekana namaqiniso: Yenza umzamo wokunganezeli ezinkingeni zomndeni wakini kodwa yiba nokuthula njengoba ubungenza kubangani bakho. UMelinda osemusha uthi: “Sonke siyawenza amaphutha futhi sizokhubana izikhathi eziningi. Yithi okumele sinqume ukuthi sizosabela kanjani—ngokuthula noma ngenye indlela.”
Funda ukubonga.
IBhayibheli lithi: “Yibani ngababongayo.” (Kolose 3:15) Ukuba obongayo kuzokusiza ugxile ezintweni ezinhle ezenzeka ekuphileni kwakho kunokugxila ezintweni ezibonakala zingezinhle.
Indlela yokubhekana namaqiniso: Vuma ukuthi unezinkinga kodwa ungavumeli izinkinga zakho zikwenze ungaziboni izinto ezinhle ezenzeka ekuphileni kwakho. Owesifazane osemusha okuthiwa uRebecca uthi: “Usuku ngalunye ngibhala okukodwa okuhle ebhukwini lami, ngifuna ukuzikhumbuza ukuthi nginezinto ezinhle engingacabanga ngazo.”
Hlola ukuthi ukhetha abangani abanjani.
IBhayibheli lithi: “Ukuzihlanganisa nababi konakalisa imikhuba emihle.” (1 Korinte 15:33) Uma uchitha isikhathi nabantu abagxekayo, ababhuqayo noma abakhuluma izinto ezimbi, imikhuba yabo engemihle izosuleleka nakuwe.
Indlela yokubhekana namaqiniso: Abangani bakho bazodlula ebunzimeni, futhi okwesikhashana bangase bangabi nombono omuhle ngokuphila kwabo. Basekele, kodwa ungavumeli izinkinga zabo zikuqede amandla. Owesifazane osemusha okuthiwa uMichelle uthi: “Akufanele sichithe isikhathi sethu kuphela nabantu abangenawo umbono omuhle ngezinto.”
Funda okwengeziwe ngezinto ezizokusiza
Siphila enkathini iBhayibheli eliyibiza ngokuthi “izikhathi ezibucayi okunzima ukubhekana nazo.” (2 Thimothewu 3:1) Ingabe ukuthola kunzima ukuhlale unombono omuhle ezweni eligcwele izinto ezimbi? Funda isihloko esithi “Kungani Kunosizi Olungaka?”