Isahluko 31

Ngingakwamukela Kanjani Ukuthi Sesihlukene?

“Sasesinezinyanga eziyisithupha sithandana futhi sasikade singabangane iminyaka emihlanu. Lapho esefuna sihlukane, wahluleka ngisho nokungibheka ebusweni. Wavele wayeka ukungikhulumisa. Ngazizwa ngingelutho. Ngadumala kakhulu. Ngangilokhu ngizibuza, ‘Yini embi engiyenzile?’”—URachel.

UKWEHLUKANA nomuntu obuthandana naye kungakuqedela injabulo, kwenze inhliziyo yakho ibe buhlungu. Cabanga ngoJeff noSusan abathandana iminyaka emibili. Phakathi naleso sikhathi basondelana kakhulu ngokomzwelo. Usuku lonke uJeff wayethumelela uSusan imiyalezo ngocingo amtshele indlela amthanda ngayo. Ngezikhathi ezithile wayepha uSusan izipho ukuze ambonise ukuthi ubecabanga ngaye. “UJeff wayezama ukungilalela nokungiqonda,” kusho uSusan. “Wayengenza ngizizwe ngiyigugu.”

Kungakabiphi, uJeff noSusan baqala ukukhuluma ngomshado nokuthi bazohlalaphi lapho sebeshadile. UJeff waze wabuza nangosayizi wendandatho ezolingana uSusan. Ngemva kwalokho, kungalindelekile wathi abahlukane! USusan wavele waphela amandla. Wayeyenza imisebenzi yansuku zonke, kodwa ezizwa ebhocobele ngenxa yokushaqeka. Uthi, “Ngazizwa ngikhandlekile engqondweni nasemzimbeni.”a

Okwenza Kube Buhlungu

Uma nawe uke waba sesimweni esifana nesikaSusan, ungase uzibuze, ‘Ngiyoke ngikwamukele yini ukuthi sesihlukene?’ Ukucindezeleka kwakho kuyaqondakala. INkosi uSolomoni yabhala, “Uthando lunamandla njengokufa.” (IsiHlabelelo SeziHlabelelo 8:6) Ngakho, ukwehlukana kungase kube into ebuhlungu ukwedlula noma yini owake wayibekezelela. Empeleni, abanye bathi ukwehlukana nomuntu obuthandana naye kufana nokuthi ufile okwesikhashana. Ungase uzithole usubhekana nalezi zigaba zosizi, mhlawumbe nezinye ezifana nalezi:

Ukungakwamukeli. ‘Akunakwenzeka. Uzowushintsha umqondo ngemva kwezinsukwana.’

Intukuthelo. ‘Angayenza kanjani into enje kimi? Angifuni nakumbona!’

Ukucindezeleka. ‘Angithandeki. Akekho umuntu oyoke angithande.’

Ukukwamukela. ‘Kuzolunga. Kubuhlungu kona, kodwa sengiba ngcono.’

Okuhle ukuthi ungakwazi ukufinyelela esigabeni sokukwamukela. Ukuthi kuzothatha isikhathi esingakanani, kuxhomeke ezicini eziningana, ezihlanganisa ukuthi ubuhlobo benu budonse isikhathi eside kangakanani nokuthi buhambe ibanga elingakanani. Okwamanje, ungabhekana kanjani nobuhlungu obuzwayo?

Ukuqhubekela Phambili

Kungenzeka uke wayizwa inkulumo ethi, Isikhathi selapha wonke amanxeba. Lapho nje nihlukana, lawo mazwi angase angasho lutho. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi nisanda kwehlukana. Nasi isibonelo: Uma usikeka, uzophola ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kodwa okwamanje kubuhlungu. Kufanele unciphise ukopha, uthobe inxeba. Kudingeka uqikelele nokuba lingangenwa amagciwane. Kuyafana nangokulimala ngokomzwelo. Njengamanje kubuhlungu. Kodwa kunezinyathelo ongazithatha ukuze unciphise ubuhlungu futhi ungangenwa igciwane eliyinzondo. Ukuhamba kwesikhathi kuzoyifeza ingxenye yako, kodwa ungayifeza kanjani eyakho? Zama lokhu okulandelayo.

● Lukhiphe usizi oluzwayo. Ayikho into engalungile ngokukhala. Angithi iBhayibheli lithi ‘kunesikhathi sokukhala’ ngisho ‘nesikhathi sokubangalasa.’ (UmShumayeli 3:1, 4) Ukukhala izinyembezi akusho ukuthi ubuthaka. Ngesikhathi ecindezelekile, ngisho noDavide—iqhawe elinesibindi—wavuma: “Njalo ebusuku umbhede wami uba manzi ngenxa yokukhala kwami; umcamelo wami ugcwala izinyembezi.”—IHubo 6:6, Today’s English Version.

● Nakekela impilo yakho. Ukuzivocavoca nokudla ukudla okunomsoco kuyokusiza uthole amandla akulahlekele ngenxa yokucindezeleka okubangelwa ukwehlukana. ‘Ukuqeqesha umzimba kuyazuzisa,’ kusho iBhayibheli.—1 Thimothewu 4:8.

Iziphi izici eziphathelene nempilo yakho okungase kudingeke uzinakekele?

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● Zigcine umatasa. Ungayeki ukwenza izinto othanda ukuzenza. Futhi manje, kunanini ngaphambili, ungazehlukanisi nabantu. (IzAga 18:1) Ukuzihlanganisa nabantu abakukhathalelayo kuzokunika okuthile okuhle ongacabanga ngakho.

Imiphi imigomo ongazibekela yona?

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● Khuluma noNkulunkulu ngemizwa yakho. Lokhu kungaba inselele. Ngemva kokwehlukana, abanye bazizwa belahlwe ngisho nanguNkulunkulu. Bathi, ‘Ngathandaza ngathandaza ngicela ukuthola umuntu ongithandayo, awubheke manje ukuthi kwenzekeni!’ (IHubo 10:1) Kodwa kulungile yini ukubheka uNkulunkulu njengomuntu nje wasezulwini ohlanganisa izithandani? Cha akulungile; futhi akanacala nalapho omunye esefuna ubuhlobo buphele. Nakhu esikwaziyo ngoJehova: ‘Uyakukhathalela.’ (1 Petru 5:7) Ngakho thulula isifuba sakho kuye ngomthandazo. IBhayibheli lithi: “Izicelo zenu mazaziwe nguNkulunkulu . . . ; ukuthula kukaNkulunkulu okudlula konke ukucabanga kuyolinda izinhliziyo zenu namandla enu engqondo ngoKristu Jesu.”—Filipi 4:6, 7.

Iziphi izinto ongazithandazela ngokukhethekile kuJehova lapho usesosizini lokwehlukana nomuntu obuthandana naye?

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Bheka Phambili

Lapho usululeme ekucindezelekeni, kuhle ukubhekisisa ukuthi kahle-hle konakalaphi ebuhlotsheni benu bangaphambili. Kungakusiza ukubhala izimpendulo zemibuzo esebhokisini elithi “Yini Engingayifunda Ekwehlukaneni Kwethu?” ekhasini 224.

Yiqiniso, ubuhlobo ebeninabo abuzange bube yilokho obufisa bube yiko. Kodwa khumbula: Lapho kunesiphepho, kulula ukugxila esibhakabhakeni esimnyama nasemvuleni. Nokho, ekugcineni imvula iyanqamuka liqale ukuphenya. Intsha ecashunwe ekuqaleni kwalesi sahluko ithole ukuthi ngemva kwesikhathi yakwazi ukukwamukela ukuthi ihlukene nabantu ethandana nabo. Qiniseka ukuthi kungenzeka okufanayo nakuwe!

[Umbhalo waphansi]

UMBHALO OYINHLOKO

“[UJehova] uphulukisa abanenhliziyo eyaphukile, abophe izindawo zabo ezibuhlungu.”—IHubo 147:3.

ICEBISO

USusan, okukhulunywe ngaye ekuqaleni kwalesi sahluko, wazenzela uhlu lwamavesi eBhayibheli futhi walugcina kahle ukuze awafunde lapho ezwa ubuhlungu. Mhlawumbe nawe ungazenzela olwakho ngeminye yemiBhalo ekulesi sahluko.

UBUWAZI . . . ?

Intsha eningi kakhulu eqomisanayo igcina ingashadile, kanti leyo eshadayo igcina ifake isehlukaniso.

ENGIZOKWENZA!

Ukuze ngikwazi ukuyidlulisa indaba yokwehlukana kwethu, ngizo- ․․․․․

Engingathuthukisa kukho ukuze ngingaphindi amaphutha afanayo lapho sengithandana nomunye umuntu ․․․․․

Engingathanda ukukubuza umzali wami (abazali) ngale ndaba ․․․․․

UCABANGANI?

● Yini oyifundile ngawe ngesikhathi nisathandana?

● Ufundeni ngabobulili obuhlukile?

[Amazwi acashunwe esihlokweni ekhasini 227]

“Ukuhamba kwesikhathi kwenza ube nombono ocace kakhudlwana. Kamuva, imizwelo yakho iyobe ingasalimele kangako, ngakho uyokwazi ukucabanga kahle ngesimo futhi uhlambuluke. Futhi ungathola okwengeziwe ngohlobo lomuntu oyilo, ukuthi ufuna ukushada nomuntu onjani nokuthi yini okufanele uyigweme ukuze ungazi-faki enkingeni efanayo ngesikhathi esizayo.’’—UCorrina

[Ibhokisi ekhasini 224]

Ishadi Lezimpendulo

Yini Engingayifunda Ekwehlukaneni Kwethu?

Uyasazi yini isizathu sokuba nihlukane? Uma usazi, sibhale ngezansi, ngisho noma ucabanga ukuthi kuyisizathu esingasho lutho. ․․․․․

Ucabanga ukuthi iziphi ezinye izizathu ezinenze nahlukana? ․․․․․

Uma ucabanga ngalokho okwanenza nahlukana, kukhona yini owawungakwenza okwakungase kwenze ningahlukani? Uma kukhona, kuyini? ․․․․․

Ukwehlukana kwenu kukwembulele yini izindlela ezithile ongathanda ukuthuthuka kuzo ngokomoya noma ngokomzwelo? ․․․․․

Yini ongayenza ngendlela ehlukile lapho uthandana nomunye umuntu, uma ikhona? ․․․․․

[Isithombe ekhasini 223]

Ukwehlukana nomuntu omthandayo kunjengokusikeka—kubuhlungu, kodwa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kuzophola