Achichepere Akufunsa Kuti . . .

Nchiyani Chimandipangitsa Kudzimva Wosungulumwa Chotero?

Ndi Loŵeruka usiku. Mnyamatayo wakhala m’chipinda chake kulingalira ponena za achichepere ena ku sukulu omwe apita kukaseŵera mpira wogubuduza pansi pa kapinga. Iye wasonkhanitsa kulimba mtima kwakuwafunsa ngati angagwirizane nawo. Koma ngakhale tsopano iye akumva chiphwete chotonza pamene iwo akuchoka.

“Ndimadana ndi kothera kwa mlungu!” iye akufuula. Koma palibe wina aliyense m’chipindamo woti amuyankhe. Iye atenga magazini ndi kuwona chithunzithunzi cha gulu la anthu achichepere ku gombe. Iye waponya magaziniyo kuchipupa. Misozi idzaza m’maso. Iye aluma mano ake pa chibwano chake chammunsi, koma misozi ikupitirizabe kukankha zikope zake. Osakhoza kumenyana nayo mopitirira, iye agwera pakama pake, akusisima, “Nchifukwa ninji nthaŵi zonse ndimasiidwa?”

KODI inu nthaŵi zina mumadzimva motero—wodulidwa kuchokera kudziko, wopanda ntchito ndipo wopanda kanthu? Kodi munayamba mwadabwapo, ‘Nchiyani chimandipangitsa kudzimva wosungulumwa chotero, ndipo nchifukwa ninji chimapweteka motero?’

Ngati mumatero, musakhumudwe. Zaka za pakati pa 13 ndi 19 ziri zovuta kwa ambiri. Mungadzimve kukhala wotaika ndipo wosadzitsimikizira inu eni. Nchosadabwitsa chotero, kuti mkati mwa zaka za pakati pa 13 ndi 19 kusungulumwa kaŵirikaŵiri kumakantha mokulira koposa.

Ngakhale kuti kudzimva wosungulumwa sikuli chiphwete, sikuli matenda opatsa imfa nkomwe. Katswiri mmodzi anayerekeza kusungulumwa ndi chimfine—“chosavuta kuchigwira, . . . chosapha kaŵirikaŵiri, koma nthaŵi zonse chosasangalatsa.” Komabe, pali njira za kulakira iko.

Chimene Kusungulumwa Kuli

Choikidwa mopepukitsa, kusungulumwa kuli chizindikiro cha chenjezo. Njala imakuchenjezani inu kuti mukufuna chakudya. Kusungulumwa kumakuchenjezani kuti mukufuna mayanjano, kukondedwa, ndi mayanjano athithithi. Timafunikira chakudya kuti tigwire ntchito bwino. Mofananamo, timafunikira mayanjano kuti timve bwino.

Kodi munayamba mwawonapo mulu wa makala oyaka? Nchiyani chimene chimachitika pamene inu mutenga khala limodzi kuchoka pa muluwo? Kuyaka kwa khala limodzi limenelo kudzazimiririka. Koma pambuyo pa kuliikanso pa muluwo, limayakanso. Mofananamo, ife monga anthu “sitingayake,” kapena kugwira ntchito bwino, modzipatula kwanthaŵi yaitali. Chiri chachibadwa kukhumba oyanjana nawo.

Imeneyi inali nkhani yofanana ndi Adamu, mwamuna woyamba. Bukhu la Baibulo la Genesis limanena kuti Adamu anaikidwa m’malo amene anakwaniritsa zofuna zake zoyambirira. Panali chakudya chambiri chakuti adye, mpweya wodzetsa mpumulo woti aupume, mtsinje wowala woti asambemo, ntchito yosangalatsa ya kuichita, ndipo pamwamba pa zonse, kusangalala ndi unansi wathithithi ndi Mlengi wake. Komabe, Yehova Mulungu ananena kuti: “Si kwabwino kuti munthu akhale yekha.” Adamu anafuna winawake wonga ngati iye kulankhula naye ndi kugawana naye malingaliro ake. Mulungu anakwaniritsa chosowa chimenecho mwa kum’patsa iye Hava. (Genesis 2:18-23) Inde, kufunika kwa maubwenzi kuli komangiriridwa m’kapangidwe kathu. Koma kodi chimenecho chimatanthauza kuti kukhala nokha nthaŵi zonse kumatsogolera ku malingaliro a kusungulumwa?

Nokha Koma Osati Wosungulumwa

Wolemba nkhani Henry David Thoreau analemba kuti: “Sindinapeze ubwenzi womwe unali waubwenzi koposa kukhala ndekha.” Kodi mukuvomereza? “Inde,” akutero Bill, wa zaka 20. “Ndimakonda chilengedwe. Nthaŵi zina ndimapita mu kabwato kanga kakang’ono ndi kupita kunja panyanja. Ndimakhala pamenepo kwa maora angapo ndekha. Chimandipatsa ine nthaŵi ya kuwunikira pa zimene ndikuchita ndi moyo wanga. Chiridi chosangalatsa kwambiri.” Akuwonjezera Rafael wa zaka 16: “Pali achichepere ena atatu m’banja lathu. Nthaŵi zonse mumakhala phokoso m’nyumba. Ndiri ndi mbale wanga wa zaka zinayi; iye amachita mwamsala. Nthaŵi zina zonse zimene ndimafuna ndi kukhala ndekha.”

Wolemba ndakatulo wa Chingelezi anawonjezera ndemanga kuti: “Kukhala nokha kuli malo a khama la Mulungu.” Steven wa zaka za kubadwa makumi aŵiri mphambu chimodzi akuvomereza. “Ndimakhala m’nyumba ya zipinda zambiri,” iye akutero, “ndipo nthaŵi zina ndimapita ku denga lanyumbayo kokha kuti ndikhale ndekha. Ndimapanga kulingalira kwina ndi kupemphera. Chiri chopatsa mpumulo.” Inde, ngati chagwiritsiridwa ntchito bwino, nthaŵi za kukhala nokha zingatipatse ife chikhutiritso chozama. Yesu, nayenso, anasangalala ndi nthaŵi zoterozo: “Ndipo m’mawa mwake anawuka [Yesu] usikusiku, natuluka namuka kuchipululu, napemphera kumeneko.” (Marko 1:35) Komabe, nchifukwa ninji anthu onga ngati Thoreau kapena Yesu sanali osungulumwa ngakhale kuti anali okha?

Choyamba, chifukwa iwo anali okha mwachosankha. Ndipo chachiŵiri, iwo anali okha kokha kwa kanthaŵi kochepa. Yehova sananene kuti, ‘Sikuli kwabwino kwa munthu kukhala yekha kokha kwa nthaŵi yochepa.’ M’malo mwake, Mulungu ananena kuti sikunali kwabwino kwa munthu “kupitiriza kukhala yekha.” Kudzipatula kwanthaŵi yaitali kungatsogolere ku kusungulumwa. Chotero Baibulo limachenjeza kuti: “Wopanduka afunafuna chifuniro chake, nakangana ndi nzeru yonse yeniyeni.”—Miyambo 18:1.

Kusungulumwa Kwakanthaŵi

Nthaŵi zina, ngakhale kuli tero, kukhala nokha sikumakhala chifukwa cha chosankha. Chotero chingapwetekedi koposa. Kusungulumwa koteroko kaŵirikaŵiri kumasonkhezeredwa pa ife ndi mikhalidwe yomwe sitingathe kuilamulira, monga ngati kupita ku malo atsopano, kutali ndi mabwenzi athithithi.

Akukumbukira Steven: “Kubwerera kunyumba James ndi ine tinali mabwenzi, apafupi kuposa abale. Pamene ndinachoka, ndinadziŵa kuti ndikamusowa iye.” Steven akupuma pang’ono, ngati kuti akupatsa mpumulo nthaŵi ya kunyamukayo. “Pamene ndinayenera kukwera ndege, ndinatsamwidwa. Tinagwirana mapewa, ndipo ndinachoka. Ndinamva ngati kuti chinachake chamtengo wapatali chinapita.”

Ndimotani mmene Steven anachitira m’malo ake achilendo? “Chinali choipa,” iye akutero. “Ndinali ndi nthaŵi yovuta kuphunzira ntchito yatsopano. Kubwerera ku mudzi mabwenzi anga anandikonda, koma kuno ena a mabwenzi atsopano amene ndinali kugwira nawo ntchito anandipangitsa ine kudzimva ngati kuti sindinali wabwino. Ndimakumbukira kuyang’ana pa koloko ndi kuŵerenga maora anayi kubwerera m’mbuyo (kumeneko kunali kusiyana kwa nthaŵi) ndi kulingalira chimene James ndi ine tikanakhala tikuchita tsopano. Ndinadzimva wosungulumwa.”

Pamene zinthu siziyenda bwino, kaŵirikaŵiri timalingalira panthaŵi zabwinoko zomwe tinali nazo kumbuyoko. Komabe, Baibulo limanena kuti: “Usanene: ‘Kodi bwanji masiku akale anapambana ano?’” (Mlaliki 7:10) Nchifukwa ninji uphunguwu?

Popeza kuti chinthu chimodzi, mikhalidwe ingasinthe kukhala yabwinoko. Chimenecho ndicho chifukwa chake ofufuza kaŵirikaŵiri amalankhula za “kusungulumwa kwa kanthaŵi.” Steven chotero akanakhoza kulaka kusungulumwa kwake. Motani? “Kulankhula ponena za malingaliro anga ndi winawake amene anasamalira kunathandiza. Simungapitirize kukhala ndi moyo wakale. Ndinadzikakamiza inemwini kukumana ndi anthu ena, kusonyeza chikondwerero mwa iwo. Chinagwira ntchito; ndinapeza mabwenzi atsopano.” Ndipo bwanji ponena za James? “Ndinali wolakwa. Kupita kwina sikunathe ubwenzi wathu. Tsiku lina ndinamutumira foni. Tinalankhula ndi kulankhula kwa ora limodzi ndi mphindi 15—paulendo wautali!”

Peter wa zaka khumi ndi zitatu ali m’mkhalidwe wina umene umapangitsa kusungulumwa. Iye amakhala m’banja la kholo limodzi. Akutero Peter: ‘Ndimabwera kunyumba kuchokera ku sukulu ndi kukhala ndekha. Ndiribe wina aliyense wolankhula naye. Pamene amayi abwera kunyumba kuchokera ku ntchito, chimakhala choipanso. Iwo amabwera otopa ndi kupita kukagona.’

Nancy wa zaka khumi mphambu zisanu ndi zitatu amakhalanso m’nyumba ya kholo limodzi. M’kuwonjezerapo, ayenera kuchita ndi kupezeka pa sukulu yatsopano. Koma Nancy sali wosungulumwa. Iye amanyamuka kukakumana ndi mabwenzi atsopano. “Chinandithandiza ine kudzipanga inemwini kukhala pamodzi,” iye akutero. Kusungulumwa kunazimiririka. Kunali kwa kanthaŵi.

Nthaŵi zina, ngakhale kuli tero, kusungulumwa kuli chotulukapo cha ngozi. “Derek anali mnzanga wa pamtima mu Florida kuyambira pamene tinali ndi zaka 11,” akulongosola tero Bill. “Tinali kupita pa kapinga limodzi, kudya mkate woikidwa matimati pakati, ndikuseŵera mpira pamodzi.” Nchiyani chimene chinachitika? “Ndinalandira foni Sande lina usiku,” Bill akupitiriza. “Derek anamira m’madzi. Chinali chovuta kwambiri kuchilandira. Pambuyo pa chimenecho, panali mphindi zimene ndinadzimva kukhala wosungulumwa kotero kuti ndinatumiza foni kunyumba kwa Derek. Foniyo inapitiriza kuimba, ndipo kenaka ndinalingalira, ‘Dikira kamphindi, Derek sali kumenekonso.’ Sindikanatha kuchigwira icho. Pamene uli ndi zaka 17, ulidi wachichepere kuti nkufa.”

Baibulo limanena za mkazi wotchedwa Naomi amene anakumanizana ndi tsoka lofananalo. Mwamuna wake ndi ana ake aŵiri a amuna anafa mmodzi pambuyo pa mnzake. Pamene anabwerera ku dziko la kwawo monga wa masiye, iye ananena kuti: “Ndinachoka pano wolemera, nandibwezanso kwathu Yehova wopanda kanthu.”—Rute 1:21.

Ngakhale kuti chisoni chotaya wokondedwa sichingazimiririke kotheratu, kusungulumwa kungazimiririke ndikupita kwanthaŵi ndi kupanga kwa maunansi atsopano. M’nkhani ya Naomi, mikhalidwe yosinthidwa ndi kupanga maunansi atsopano kunam’thandiza ‘kubwezeretsa moyo wake.’ (Rute 4:13-15) Munthu angazimizenso iyemwini m’kuchita zinthu kaamba ka ena. Yesu ananena kuti: “Muli chimwemwe chambiri m’kupatsa koposa chimene chiri m’kulandira, NW.”—Machitidwe 20:35.

Koma bwanji ngati kusungulumwa kwanu kupitirira? Ndiye kuti mungadwale kusungulumwa kosatha. Kodi chimenecho nchiyani, ndipo ndimotani mmene mungakulakire iko? Kope la mtsogolo la Galamukani! lidzayankha.