Kodi Ena a Mavutowo ndi Otani?
Agogo, makolo, ndi adzukulu—mibadwo itatu yosiyanitsidwa ndi zaka makumi angapo chabe, komabe yosiyana kwambiri maganizo.
AGOGO ambiri anaona zochitika zowopsa za nkhondo ya dziko yachiŵiri, limodzi ndi zotukulapo zake zonse zosakaza. Ana awo mwinamwake anali aang’ono panthaŵi ya kutsutsa zinthu kwa anthu ndi kuwonjezereka kwa chuma kwa ma 60. Lerolino adzukulu awo akukhala m’dziko lopanda makhalidwe. Ndi kusinthasintha kofulumira kwa anthu otchuka opereka zitsanzo lerolino, nkovuta kuti mbadwo wina uphunzitse wotsatira kulemekeza zimene uwo umaŵerengera. Kanthu kena kakusoŵeka, kanthu koti kasonkhezere anthu a mibadwo yosiyana kugwirizana ndi kulemekezana. Koma kodi iko nchiyani?
Kaŵirikaŵiri, agogo okhala ndi cholinga chabwino amaloŵerera m’nkhani za banja la ana awo okwatirana, akumadandaula kuti makolowo akukhwimitsa zinthu kapena akulekerera kwambiri adzukulu awo. Komanso, mwambi wina Wachispanya umati: “Chilango cha agogo sichimathandiza adzukulu”—popeza kuti kaŵirikaŵiri agogo amakhala olekerera. Mwinamwake iwo amaloŵerera chifukwa chakuti amafuna kuti ana awo apeŵe zophophonya zina zimene, chifukwa cha kudziŵa kwawo, akuona bwino lomwe. Komabe, iwo sangathe kuona ndi kuzindikira moyenera kusintha kwa maunansi awo ndi ana awo okwatirana. Anawo, amene chifukwa cha ukwati apeza ufulu umene anaulakalaka kwanthaŵi yaitali, safuna kudodometsedwa. Tsopano popeza kuti iwo akugwira ntchito zolimba kuti achirikize banjalo, sakufuna zopinga pa kuyenera kwa kupanga zosankha zawo. Adzukulu, amene angaganize kuti amadziŵa zonse, amaipidwa ndi malamulo ndipo mwinamwake amaona agogo awo kukhala achikale. M’zitaganya zamakono, agogo akuchita ngati kuti ataya chikoka. Kaŵirikaŵiri kudziŵa kwawo zinthu kumanyalanyazidwa.
Pamene Kukambitsirana Kulekeka
Nthaŵi zina mkhalidwe wa kusamvana wonga khoma lolimba umalekanitsa agogo ndi banja lonse ngakhale pamene akukhalira pamodzi ndi ana awo. Mwachisoni, zimenezi zimachitika panthaŵi yeniyeniyo pamene agogowo afunikira kukondedwa kwambiri, chifukwa chakuti ukalamba wayamba kukhala chinthu chovuta. Kuti munthu akhale wosukidwa satofunikira kukhala yekha. Pamene kukambitsirana kulekeka, pamene ulemu ndi chikondi ziloŵedwa m’malo ndi kunyalanyazidwa kapena kuwakwiyira, zotulukapo zake nzakuti agogowo amatalikirana kotheratu ndi ena ndipo amagwiritsidwa mwala kwambiri. Amavutikira cha mumtima. Mphunzitsi wina Giacomo Dacquino akulemba kuti: “Chikondi m’banja, chimene winawake posachedwapa anachiyerekezera ndi galimoto yakale kwambiri, chidakali mankhwala abwino koposa a okalamba. Nkhope yachifundo, kumwetulira kokoma mtima, ndi mawu abwino, kapena kusisita kumathandiza kwambiri kuposa mankhwala ambiri.”—Libertà di invecchiare (Kumasuka pa Ukalamba).
Chitsanzo Chanu Chingathandize Kwambiri
Mavuto amene amabuka pa maunansi a m’banja omaipa amachititsanso madandaulo osatha pakati pa mibadwoyo. Chiŵalo china cha m’banja chingaone chilichonse chimene wina amachita kukhala cholakwa. Komano onse amayambukiridwa ndi mkhalidwe woipawo. Ana amaona mmene makolo awo amachitira ndi agogowo ndiponso ndi mmene agogowo amachitira. Ngakhale kuti kwakukulukulu anthu okalambawo amavutikira cha mumtima, adzukuluwo amamva, amaona, ndipo amakumbukira. Motero zimenezo zimayambukira khalidwe la mtsogolo. Pamene akhala achikulire, angachite ndi makolo awo mofanana kwambiri ndi mmene iwowo anachitira kwa agogo awo. Sitingathe kuzemba lamulo la mkhalidwe la Baibulo lakuti: “Chimene munthu achifesa, chimenenso adzachituta.”—Agalatiya 6:7.
Ngati adzukulu aona makolo akuchitira agogo awo monyalanyaza—kuwanyodola, kuwatontholetsa mwachipongwe, kapena ngakhale kuwanyengerera—zimenezi nazonso zingakhale njira yodzachitira kwa makolo awo pamene akalamba. Kukhala ndi chithunzithunzi cha agogo m’feremu pakabati sikuli kokwanira—ayenera kuchitiridwa ulemu ndi kukondedwa monga anthu. M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, mkhalidwe wofananawo ungachitidwe ndi adzukulu. Kwanenedwa kuti vuto la kuchitira nkhanza agogo likufalikira kwambiri. M’maiko ena a ku Ulaya, malo opemphako thandizo patelefoni akhazikitsidwa kuthangata anthu okalamba ochitiridwa nkhanza, ofanana ndi aja omwe alipo kale a ntchito yotetezera ana.
Dyera, kunyada, ndi kupanda chikondi zimawonjezera kusamvana. Motero, chiŵerengero cha awo amene amayesa kutaya agogo mwa kuwaika m’nyumba zosungiramo okalamba chikukula. Ena amawononga ndalama zambiri kuti adziwonjole pa thayo la kusamalira okalamba, akumakawaikiza kunyumba zina zapadera zokhala ndi ziŵiya zonse zamakono kapena kumidzi ya anthu opuma pantchito yonga ija ya ku Florida kapena ku California, United States of America, okhala ndi masupamaliketi ambirimbiri ndi malo osangulutsa komabe opanda anthu amene amakonda oti aziseka nawo ndi kuwasisita ndi adzukulu owakumbatira. Makamaka panthaŵi yopita kutchuthi, ambiri amafunafuna malo ‘okaikiza’ agogo aakazi ndi aamuna. Ku India nthaŵi zina mkhalidwewo umakhala woipa kwambiri pamene agogo ena amangosiyidwa kuti adzionere.
Mavuto omwe amakhalapo pa kuchititsa maunansi a m’banja kukhala ogwirizana amakulitsidwa ndi chisudzulo. Banja limodzi lokha mwa mabanja anayi Achibritishi lidakali ndi makolo onse okhala pamodzi. Chisudzulo chikuwonjezereka padziko lonse. Ku United States, kumakhala zisudzulo zoposa miliyoni imodzi chaka chilichonse. Motero mosayembekezereka agogo amayang’anizana ndi mavuto a mu ukwati a ana awo ndi kusintha kwakukulu kwambiri kwa maunansi awo ndi adzukulu awo komwe kumatsatirapo. Kuwonjezera pa kuchita manyazi ndi yemwe kale anali mkamwini wawo kapena mpongozi wawo pali vuto la “kufika kwadzidzidzi kwa adzukulu ‘opeza’” ngati, monga momwe nyuzipepala ina Yachitaliyana Corriere Salute inasimbira, “wa mu ukwati mnzake wa mwana wawo wamwamuna kapena wamkazi ali ndi ana a mu ukwati wake woyamba.”
“Umoyo m’Moyo Wathu”
Komabe, unansi wotentha ndi wachikondi ndi agogo a munthuwe, kaya akukhala ndi banjalo kapena ayi, ngwopindulitsa kwambiri kwa onse. “Kuchitira ana ndi adzukulu athu kanthu kena,” akutero Ryoko, gogo wachikazi wa ku Fukui, Japan, “nkokwanira kuika umoyo m’moyo wathu.” Malinga ndi zotulukapo za kufufuza kofalitsidwa ndi Corriere Salute, gulu la akatswiri a ku United States likusimbidwa kukhala litanena kuti: “Pamene agogo ndi adzukulu akhala ndi mwaŵi wa kukhala ndi unansi wa chikondi chachikulu, mapindu ake amakhala aakulu koposa osati kwa ana okhawo komanso m’banja monsemo.”
Nangano, kodi nchiyani chimene chingachitidwe kuthetsa kusamvana kwa anthuwo, kusiyana kwa mibadwo, ndi zibadwa zadyera zimene zimayambukira moipa maunansi apabanja? Nkhani imeneyi idzafotozedwa m’nkhani yotsatira.
[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 6]
“Chinthu choipa kwambiri ponena za kukalamba ndicho kusamvetseredwa.”—Albert Camus, wolemba manovelo Wachifrenchi