Kuvumbula Mizu ya Mwano
“Mkamwa mungolankhula mwa kusefuka kwake kwa mtima.”—MATEYU 12:34.
YESU KRISTU ananena mawuwa pafupifupi zaka zikwi ziŵiri zapitazo. Inde, kaŵirikaŵiri mawu a munthu amasonyeza malingaliro ndi zolinga za pansi pa mtima wake. Angakhale oyamikika. (Miyambo 16:23) Komanso, angakhale achinyengo.—Mateyu 15:19.
Mkazi wina ponena za mwamuna wake anati: “Achita ngati amapsa mtima mosayembekezereka, ndipo kaŵirikaŵiri kukhala naye kumakhala ngati kuyenda m’malo otcheredwa mabomba—sungadziŵe chimene chidzaputa mkwiyo.” Richard akufotokoza mkhalidwe wofananawo wa mkazi wake. “Nthaŵi zonse Lydia amakhala wokonzekera nkhondo,” iye akutero. “Samangolankhula; amandiukira ndi mawu mwandewu, akumandiloza ndi chala monga ngati ndine kamwana.”
Ndithudi, mikangano ingabuke ngakhale m’maukwati abwino kwambiri, ndipo amuna ndi akazi onse amanena zinthu zimene amadzamva nazo chisoni pambuyo pake. (Yakobo 3:2) Koma mwano wa mu ukwati umakhala woposa zimenezo; umaphatikizapo kunyoza ndi kusuliza kumene cholinga chake ndicho kulamulira, mnzanu. Nthaŵi zina, mawu ovulaza amakhala ngati achifatso. Mwachitsanzo, wamasalmo Davide analongosola za munthu wina amene anali wolankhula mofeŵa, komano pansi pa mtima anali wachiwembu kuti: “Pakamwa pake mposalala ngati mafuta amkaka, koma mumtima mwake munali nkhondo: mawu ake ngofeŵa ngati mafuta oyenga, koma anali malupanga osololasolola.” (Salmo 55:21; Miyambo 26:24, 25) Kaya ikhale njiru yapoyera kapena yobisika, mawu okakala angawononge ukwati.
Mmene Umayambira
Kodi nchiyani chimene chimapangitsa munthu kugwiritsira ntchito mawu amwano? Kaŵirikaŵiri, kugwiritsira ntchito mawu otero kukhoza kudziŵidwa ndi zimene munthuyo amaona ndi kumva. M’maiko ambiri chipongwe, kutukwana, ndi kunyodola zimalingaliridwa kukhala zovomerezeka ndipo monga zanthabwala.a Makamaka amuna amasonkhezeredwa ndi ofalitsa nkhani, amene kaŵirikaŵiri asonyeza amuna “enieni” kukhala amene amalamulira ndi ankhondo.
Mofananamo, ambiri amene amagwiritsira ntchito mawu onyoza analeredwa m’mabanja mmene kholo linali kukalipa, kukhumudwa, ndi kunyodola nthaŵi zonse. Motero, kuyambira pausinkhu waung’ono, analandira uthenga wakuti mtundu umenewu wa khalidwe ngwachibadwa.
Mwana amene waleredwa mu mkhalidwe wotero angatengere zambiri kuposa kalankhulidweko chabe; iye angalandirenso mwa iye lingaliro lokhota la iye mwini ndi mwa ena. Mwachitsanzo, ngati mwana amauzidwa zinthu mokakala, angakule akumalingalira kuti ali wopanda pake, ngakhale kukhala wamtima wapachala. Koma bwanji ngati mwana wamwamuna amangomva atate wake akunyoza amake mwaukali? Ngakhale ngati mwanayo ali wamng’ono kwambiri, iyeyo angatengere kwambiri kuchitira chipongwe akazi kwa atate wake. Mnyamata angaphunzire pa khalidwe la atate wake kuti mwamuna afunikira kulamulira akazi ndi kuti, kuti awalamulire ayenera kuwawopseza kapena kuwavulaza.
Kholo lamkwiyo lingalere mwana wamkwiyo, amene nayenso angakule kudzakhala “mbuye wa ukali” amene amachita “zolakwa zambiri.” (Miyambo 29:22, NW, mawu amtsinde) Motero choloŵa cha kulankhula mawu ovulaza chingaperekedwe kumbadwa zotsatira. Ndi chifukwa chabwino, Paulo analangiza atate kuti: “Musaputa ana anu.” (Akolose 3:21) Kwenikweni, liwu lachigiriki lotembenuzidwa kuti “puta,” malinga ndi kunena kwa Theological Lexicon of the New Testament, lingakhale ndi lingaliro la “kukonzekera ndi kusonkhezera nkhondo.”
Zoonadi, chisonkhezero cha kholo sichimalungamitsa kuukira ena, mwamawu kapena mwanjira ina; komano chimatithandiza kuzindikira mmene chikhoterero cha kulankhula mwaukali chingakhomerezekere mwa munthu. Mnyamata sangamachitire nkhanza mkazi wake mwa kummenya, koma kodi iye amamchitira nkhanza ndi mawu ake ndi khalidwe lake? Kudzipenda kungasonyeze munthuyo kuti watengera kwambiri kuchitira chipongwe akazi kwa atate wake.
Mwachionekere, mapulinsipulo ameneŵa angakhudzenso akazi. Ngati amayi amachitira mwano amuna awo, mwana wamkazi angadzachitirenso chimodzimodzi mwamuna wake pamene adzakwatiwa. Mwambi wa Baibulo umati: “Kuli bwino kwambiri kukhala kuchipululu, koposa kukhala ndi mkazi wa lilime loŵaŵa ndi wamkwiyo.” (Miyambo 21:19, The Bible in Basic English) Chikhalirechobe, mwamuna ayenera kukhala wosamala kwambiri pankhaniyi. Chifukwa ninji?
Mphamvu ya Otsendereza
Kaŵirikaŵiri mwamuna amakhala ndi mphamvu yokulirapo muukwati kuposa imene mkazi amakhala nayo. Iye kaŵirikaŵiri amakhala ndi thupi lojintcha, limene limachititsa mawu ake alionse akuti adzamvulaza kukhala owopsa kwambiri.b Ndiponso, kaŵirikaŵiri mwamuna amakhala ndi maluso abwinopo a ntchito, maluso ambiri a kuchita zinthu mosadalira pa ena, ndi mwaŵi wokulirapo wa kupeza ndalama. Chifukwa cha zimenezi, mkazi woukiridwa ndi mawu angamve kukhala wogwidwa mumsampha ndi wokhala yekhayekha. Iye angavomereze mawu a Mfumu yanzeru Solomo akuti: “Ndinabweranso tsono ndi kupenyera nsautso zonse zimachitidwa kunja kuno; ndipo taona, misozi ya otsenderezedwa, koma analibe wakuwatonthoza; ndipo akuwatsendereza anali ndi mphamvu koma iwowa analibe wakuwatonthoza.”—Mlaliki 4:1.
Mkazi angasokonezeke maganizo ngati mwamuna wake amasinthasintha—panthaŵi ina kukhala waulemu kwambiri, panthaŵi yotsatira wosuliza kwambiri. (Yerekezerani ndi Yakobo 3:10.) Ndiponso, ngati mwamuna wake amasamalira bwino banja, mkazi amene amauzidwa zinthu mwaukali angakhale ndi liwongo polingalira kuti kanthu kena kali kolakwika mu ukwatiwo. Mwina angayambedi kudziimba mlandu wa kuchititsa khalidwe la mwamuna wakeyo. “Monga mkazi womenyedwa,” akuulula motero mkazi wina, “nthaŵi zonse ndinali kuganiza kuti ndine amene ndinali wochititsa zimenezi.” Mkazi wina akunena kuti: “Zinandichititsa kulingalira kuti ngati ndingayeseyese kumumvetsa ndi ‘kupirira’ naye ndidzapeza mtendere.” Mwachisoni, nkhanzayo imangopitirizabe kaŵirikaŵiri.
Nzomvetsa chisonidi kuti amuna ambiri amagwiritsira ntchito molakwa mphamvu yawo mwa kulamulira mkazi amene anaŵinda kuti adzamkonda ndi kumsamalira. (Genesis 3:16) Koma kodi nchiyani chimene chingachitidwe pa mkhalidwe wotero? “Sindikufuna kuchoka,” mkazi wina akutero, “ndikungofuna kuti aleke kundichitira nkhanza.” Atakhala mu ukwati kwa zaka zisanu ndi zinayi, mwamuna wina akuvomereza kuti: “Ndikuzindikira kuti ndinali mu unansi wa nkhanza ya mawu ndi kuti ineyo ndine amene ndimachita nkhanzayo. Ndikufunadi kusintha, osati kuchoka.”
Pali thandizo la awo amene ukwati wawo uli m’mavuto ndi mawu opweteka, monga momwe nkhani yotsatira idzasonyezera.
[Mawu a M’munsi]
a Zimenezi zinali chonchonso m’zaka za zana loyamba malinga ndi umboni. The New International Dictionary of New Testament Theology ikunena kuti “kwa Agiriki kudziŵa kutukwana ena kapena kupirira ndi kutukwanidwa kunali limodzi la maluso a m’moyo.”
b Kuukira ndi mawu kungakhale mlatho wa ku ndewu ya m’banja. (Yerekezerani ndi Eksodo 21:18.) Phungu wina wa akazi omenyedwa akunena kuti: “Mkazi aliyense amene amafika kudzapeza lamulo lomtetezera pa kumenyedwa, kubayidwa, kapena kukhamidwa koika moyo wake pangozi, kuwonjezera pa zimenezi, wakhalapo ndi mbiri yaitali ya kuchitiridwa nkhanza mwamawu.”
[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 22]
Mwachisoni, amuna ambiri amagwiritsira ntchito molakwa mphamvu yawo mwa kulamulira mkazi amene anaŵinda kuti adzamkonda ndi kumsamalira
[Chithunzi patsamba 23]
Mwana amayambukiridwa ndi mmene makolo ake amachitirana