Makolo Ali Pavuto
MWANA woyamba atabadwa, makolo amakhala ndi chisangalalo. Pafupifupi chilichonse chomwe mwana wawo akuchita chimaoneka kuti chikuwasangalatsa. Kumwetulira kwa mwanayo koyamba, kuyamba kutchula mawu, ndiponso kuyamba kuyenda zimakhala nthaŵi zosangalatsa. Amasangalatsa mabwenzi ndi achibale ndi nkhani za mwanayo ndi kuwasonyeza zithunzi zake. Mwachionekere, amakonda mwana wawoyo.
Komabe, m’mabanja ena, pakapita zaka mavuto amayambika. Mawu osangalala amakolo aja amaloŵedwa m’malo ndi mawu aukali ndi onyoza; kukumbatira mwana kuja kumasanduka kumenya kapena kuleka osamgwiranso; chimwemwe chamakolo chimasanduka chisoni. “Nkadangokhala wopanda ana ine,” ambiri amatero. Koma m’mabanja ena, vutolo nlalikulu kwambiri—makolo analephera kusonyeza chikondi ngakhale pamene mwanayo anali wamng’ono! Mbali zonse ziŵiri, chinalakwika nchiyani? Kodi chikondi chapita kuti?
Ndithudi, ana satha kwenikweni kupeza mayankho a mafunso oterewa. Komabe sikuti izi zidzawalepheretsa kuganizapo kanthu. Pansi pamtima, mwana adzati, ‘Ngati Mayi kapena Bambo sandikonda, nchifukwa chakuti pali chinachake cholakwika ndi ine. Ndiyenera kukhala woipa kwambiri.’ Kukhulupirira zimenezi kukhoza kuzika mizu—ndipo kukhoza kuwonongetsa zambiri m’moyo wonse.
Komabe nzoona kuti makolo angalephere kusonyeza chikondi chofunika kwa ana awo pa zifukwa zosiyanasiyana. Tiyenera kuvomereza kuti masiku ano makolo amakumana ndi mavuto osiyanasiyana, ena mwa iwo osayerekezereka. Kwa makolo omwe sanakonzekere bwino kulimbana ndi mavuto otere, zimenezi zikhoza kusokoneza zomwe amachita paudindo wawo monga makolo. Mwambi wina wakale wanzeru umati: “Nsautso iyalutsa wanzeru.”—Mlaliki 7:7.
“Nthaŵi Zoŵaŵitsa”
Nthaŵi yoti zinthu zonse ziyambe kuyenda bwino. Izi ndizo zimene anthu ambiri ankayembekezera kuona m’zaka za zana lino. Lingalirani—popanda mavuto azachuma, njala, chilala, nkhondo! Koma zimenezo sizinachitike. M’malo mwake, lero dziko lili monga momwe mlembi wa Baibulo analoserera kumbuyoko m’zaka za zana loyamba C.E. Iye analemba kuti m’masiku athu ano tidzakhala mu “nthaŵi zoŵaŵitsa.” (2 Timoteo 3:1-5) Makolo ambiri ndiwo akhoza kuyambirira kuvomereza mawu ameneŵa.
Makolo ambiri omwe ali ndi mwana wawo woyamba kaŵirikaŵiri amadabwa ndi kukwera mitengo kwa zinthu zolerera ana m’dziko lamakonoli. Kaŵirikaŵiri, makolo onse amayenera kupita ku ntchito kuti apeze zofunika panyumba. Ndalama zogulira mankhwala, zovala, sukulu, kudzisamalira thupi, ndiponso chakudya ndi nyumba. Zimenezi zimawasiya atapseratu pakutha kwa mwezi. Mkhalidwe wa zachuma umakumbutsa ophunzira Baibulo za ulosi wa m’Chivumbulutso woneneratu za nthaŵi pamene anthu azidzawononga malipiro a tsiku lonse kuti agule zofunika za tsiku limodzi lokha!—Chivumbulutso 6:6.
Ana satha kumvetsa mavuto onseŵa omwe makolo awo amakumana nawo. Ndithudi, mwachibadwa, ana amafuna zambiri, ofuna chikondi ndi chisamaliro. Ndiponso malinga ndi momwe osatsa malonda amawasonkhezerera kuphatikizapo anzawo akusukulu omwe amawakhumbiza zoseŵeretsa zatsopano, zovala ndiponso tizipangizo tina tamagetsi, zimawapangitsa kuvutitsa makolo kuti awapatse zinthu zambiri zomwe akufunazo.
Vuto lina pa makolo, lomwe likuoneka kuti likukula kwambiri masiku ano ndilo mzimu wachipanduko. Komanso, Baibulo linalosera kuti kusamvera makolo kwa ana chidzakhala chisonyezero china cha nthaŵi zathu zovuta zino. (2 Timoteo 3:2) Ndithudi, mavuto akupulupudza kwa ana si atsopano. Ndipo palibe kholo liyenera kunena kuti kuchitira mwana nkhanza nkoyenera ngati ali wopulupudza. Koma kodi simungavomereze kuti masiku ano makolo ayenera kuyesayesa zolimba kuti alere bwino ana pakati pa khalidwe lamakono lachipanduko? Nyimbo zotchuka zimalimbikitsa mkwiyo, kupanduka, ndiponso kukhumudwa; maprogramu a pa TV amasonyeza kuti makolo ndi opusa omangosokoneza zinthu ndi kuti ana ndi anzeru ochita zolongosoka; mafilimu amalimbikitsa chiwawa—ana masiku ano amalimbikitsidwa zimenezi. Ana omwe amatengera ndi kutsatira chikhalidwe chopandukirachi amavutitsa makolo awo kwambiri.
“Opanda Chikondi Chachibadwidwe”
Koma, palinso kanthu kena paulosi wakale umenewu, kamene kamasonyeratu mavuto kwambiri ku mabanja amasiku ano. Umati anthu ambiri adzakhala “opanda chikondi chachibadwidwe.” (2 Timoteo 3:3) Chikondi chachibadwidwe ndicho chimamanga banja pamodzi. Ngakhale awo amene amakayikira kwambiri ulosi wa Baibulo akhoza kuvomereza kuti nthaŵi zathu zino moyo wabanja wawonongeka. Kuzungulira dziko lonse lapansi, kusudzulana kwakula. M’malo ambiri, mabanja a kholo limodzi ndi a kholo lopeza ngochuluka kuposa mabanja a mwambo wake. Kholo lomwe lili lokha ndiponso kholo lopeza nthaŵi zina limakumana ndi mavuto ena apadera amene amapangitsa kukhala kovuta kuti asonyeze ana chikondi chomwe amafunikira.
Komabe, pali chopangitsa china. Makolo ambiri amasiku ano iwo eni anakulira m’nyumba imene munali “chikondi cha chibadwidwe” pang’ono chabe kapena munalibiretu—m’banja mmene munali chigololo ndi kusudzulana; mmene munalibe nsangala ndipo munali chidani; mwinamwake mmene munali kunyozana, kukhumudwitsana, kumenyana, kapena kuzunza akazi! Kukulira m’nyumba zotero sikuti kumangowononga ana chabe komanso kumawononga umunthu wawo atakula. Maumboni amasonyeza zoopsa—makolo amene anazunzidwa akali ana kaŵirikaŵiri amadzazunzanso ana awo. M’nthaŵi za m’Baibulo Ayuda anali ndi mwambi wakuti: “Atate adadya mphesa zosacha, ndi mano a ana ayayamira.”—Ezekieli 18:2.
Komabe, Mulungu anauza anthu ake kuti zinthu siziyenera kukhala motero. (Ezekieli 18:3) Tiyenera kutchulapo mfundo yofunika. Kodi malinga ngati pali zitsenderezo zimenezi pa makolo basi zikutanthauza kuti alibe chochita koma nawonso kumangozunza ana awo? Ayi ndithu! Ngati ndinu kholo ndipo mukulimbana ndi mavuto amene tatchulawo ndipo simukudziŵa ngati mungathe kukhala kholo labwino, khazikani mtima pansi! Sikuti basi mwalephera kale. Zakale siziyenera kulamulira mtsogolo mwanu.
Mogwirizana ndi mmene Malemba amanenera kuti kusintha nkotheka, buku lakuti Healthy Parenting linanena mawu awa: “Ngati simuchitapo kanthu kuti musinthe khalidwe kusiyanitsa ndi la makolo anu, mudzaonetsa khalidwe lanu la paubwana kaya mukufuna kapena ayi. Kuti musinthe, muyenera kuzindikira kuipa kwa khalidwe limene muli nalo ndipo phunzirani mmene mungalisiyire.”
Inde, ngati nkotheka, mukhoza kulileka khalidwe la nkhanza la makolo anu! Ndipo mukhoza kuthana nawo mavuto amene amapangitsa kulera ana masiku ano kukhala kovuta. Koma ndi motani? Kodi nkuti kumene mungaphunzireko khalidwe labwino, lodalirika, khalidwe loyenera paukholo wabwino? Nkhani yathu yotsatira idzakamba zimenezo.
[Chithunzi patsamba 6]
Chifukwa cha mavuto, makolo ena amalephera kusonyeza chikondi kwa ana awo
[Chithunzi patsamba 7]
Makolo ayenera kusonyeza chikondi chimene ana awo amachifuna