Vechiduku Vanobvunza Kuti . . .

Ndokwomuzvarirwo Here Kuva Mhandara?

‘Chinhu chipi nechipi chiri kukunetsa here nhasi, Jane?’ akabvunza kudaro chiremba ane mutsa.

‘Chiremba,’ iye akadaro nenzira yokuzengurira, ‘vakawanda kwazvo vavasikana vari kuchikoro vari kutaura pamusoro pokunwa piritsi rokudzora kubereka ndokuva nevatano. Pane chinhu chipi nechipi chakaipa kwandiri here nemhaka yokuti handisiri kuva nevatano?’—What Shall We Tell the Kids?, rakanyorwa naDr. Bennett Olshaker.

UMHANDARA. Munguva dzakapfuura hwakanga huri chiratidzo chorukudzo. Mazuva ano, pwere dzakawanda dzinohurangarira sechisakiso chenyadzi nokunyara, mugariro usati uri womuzvarirwo, hosha inofanira ku“rapwa” nokukurumidza sezvinobvira.

Nenzira isingashamisi, pwere dziri kurega rucheno rwadzo muzviverengero zvikuru. Somuenzaniso, kunzverwa kwa 1983 kwepwere dzokuGermany kwakazivisa kuti 9 muzana bedzi yavasikana vane zera ramakore 15 uye 4 muzana yavakomana vane zera ramakore 15 vakanga vava nevatano. Pakazosvika 1989 zviverengero zvacho zvakanga zvakwira kusvikira ku 25 muzana ne 20 muzana vamwe navamwe! Kombamiro dzakafanana dzinocherekedzwa kupota nyika yose.

Chiiko, kunyanguvezvo, chakapa umhandara mukurumbira wakashata pakati pepwere? Pwere dzezvizvarwa zvose dzakafanira kubata nokunzwa kwakasimba kunonyandurwa mukati mokuyaruka. Pwere dzanhasi, zvisinei, dzinokura munyika inodzipa nhungamiro yetsika shomanene kana kuti kusapa. Mune imwe nyika yokuEurope, boka ravakuru vechiKristu rinoshuma, kuti: “Pasinei zvapo nechitarisiko chokunze chorudzidziso, iyi zvikurukuru inyika isina tsika. Vatano youtere inoshivirirwa so‘utera hwavanhu.’ Vana vanorerwa mumhuri umo vabereki vacho vasina kuroorana. Kuzivisa kunotsigira vatano kwakaipa zvikuru muno kupfuura muimwe nyika ipi neipi iri munyika yokuMadokero.”

Pwere dziri munyika dziri kubudirira nenzira yakafanana dzakaratidzirwa kusundo dzine simba dzetsika nedzemari idzo dzinokurudzira vatano yokusasarura. ‘Kana jaya risingavi nevatano,’ pwere dziri mune imwe nyika yomuAfrica dzinonyeverwa kudaro, ‘ipapo muviri waro uchaneteswa.’ Chinozivikanwa navose zvakafanana chitendero chokuti ‘musikana haazivi upenyu kutozosvikira avatana nomukomana.’

Kupfuurirazve, nemhaka yokupararira kwokushaikwa kwamabasa nourombo, musikana angatya kuramba kuraira kwomushandirwi anokarirwa kwokuti avatane naye. Nenzira yakafanana vadzidzisi vangaraira vatano somuripo wokupasa muchikoro. Chokwadi, hakusati kuri kwechienzi kuti vasikana varombo vaite vatano mutsinhano nezvinodikanwa zvinokosha—kunyange nokuda kwebhaa resipo! “Kuva nevatano kunorangarirwa zvikuru kuva kwakafanana nokunwa kana kuti kudya,” vanoshuma kudaro vacherekedzi mune imwe nyika iri kubudirira.

Dzvinyiriro Yavaenzani

Inopesvedzera zvikuru, kunyanguvezvo, idzvinyiriro inobva kuvaenzani. Pwere ichiri yakachena sezvingabvira ingava nyajambwa wokunetswa nokushushwa zvinorwadza. Uye kana uri mumwe weZvapupu zvaJehovha, zvikurukuru ungatsaurwa muna ikoku. Vaenzani vako vangakuudza kuti hausi murume chaiyeiye kana kuti mukadzi kutoti wakava nevatano. Vangataura kuti ipfungwa yakanaka kuva no“ruzivo rwokuzviwanira” pamberi peroorano. Kana kuti vangaedza kukuudza nyaya dzezvinoitika zvakaipa zvevatano isati iri yapamutemo.

“Sally aizoramba achitaura pamusoro pokuti vatano nomukomana wake yaifadza sei,” yakadaro imwe mhandara. “Akaitawo kuti ndifunge kuti ndakanga ndiri kurasikirwa nomumwe wemifarwa mikuru youpenyu.” Dzichikundikana kuziva kuti “pane kuganza kwakawanda, kututsira uye kunyepa pamusoro pevatano inovapo pakati pavechiduku,” pwere dzakawanda dzinotsauswa nenyaya dzakadaro. (Coping With Teenage Depression, rakanyorwa naKathleen McCoy) Imwe mhandara inonzi Maria iyo yakarega rucheno rwayo muvatano youtere inoyeuka, kuti: “Ndakanzwa ndichidzvinyirirwa, uye ndaida zvikuru kwazvo kuva anogamuchirwa. Kunyange zvazvo ndakanga ndichiziva kuti kwakanga kusina kururama, ndaida kuva akafanana nomumwe munhu ari wose—kuva nomukomana.”

Mamirioni epwere akagamuchira nenzira yakafanana nhema dzenyika uye akasvika pakudavira kuti rucheno harusati rwuri rwomuzvarirwo uye kuti vatano yapamberi peroorano yakafanana nokutamba kusingakuvadzi. Vakachena nokudaro vodokuva mbeu dziri mungozi pakati pepwere.

Umhandara—Murangariro waMwari

Kunyanguvezvo, kune rutivi rwevatano yapamberi peroorano urwo vaenzani vako vangasataura pamusoro parwo. Maria anoyeuka, kuti: “Pashure pacho ndakanzwa ndichinyara uye ndanyadziswa. Ndakazvivenga ndimene uye ndakavenga mukomana wangu.” Zvinoitika zvakadaro zvinozivikanwa navose zvikuru kupfuura zvinobvuma pwere zhinjisa. Kanganwa nhema uye kututsira zvaunganzwa kuvaenzani vako. Chaizvoizvo vatano yapamberi peroorano kazhinji kazhinji ndichinoitika chinorwadza mumurangariro uye chinonyadzisa—nemiuyo inoparadza!

Ikoku hakufaniri kukushamisa. Nokuti nepo nyika ingasanorangarira zvikuru vatano yapamberi peroorano seyakanaka neyomuzvarirwo, ikoku hakusati kuchiyiita kuti ive yakarurama mumeso aMwari. Jesu Kristu anotiyeuchidza kuti “zvinokudzwa pakati pavanhu zvinonyangadza pamberi paMwari.” (Ruka 16:15, NW) Mwari ane mipimo yake amene yokuzvibata kunogamuchirika. “Nokuti kuda kwaMwari,” rinodaro Bhaibheri, “ndihwo utsvene hwenyu, murege upombwe; kuti mumwe nomumwe wenyu azive kuzviwanira mudziyo wake noutsvene nokukudzwa . . . Nokuti Mwari haana kutidanira tsvina, asi muutsvene.”—1 VaTesaronika 4:3-7.

Kana toreva nezvaMwari, ipapoka, rucheno rwejaya kana kuti mhandara harusati rwuri bedzi rwomuzvarirwo asi rwakatsvinda uye rutsvene! Muna Israeri wakare, mhandara dzakanga dzichifarikanya mugariro unokudzwa. Idzo dzaidzivirirwa noMutemo mukubatwa chibharo. (Dheuteronomio 22:19, 28, 29) Uye rucheno runopfuurira kukudzwa pakati pamaKristu echokwadi. Ungano yechiKristu imene inofananidzwa ne“mhandara yakachena” nemhaka yorucheno rwayo rwetsika.—2 VaKorinte 11:2; Zvakazarurwa 21:9.

Bhaibheri hapana parinokurudzira pwere kurangarira umhandara hwadzo sokutukwa. Mukupesana, muapostora Pauro akataura kuti “uyo anomira akasimba pamwoyo pake . . . kuti uchachengeta [umhandara hwake, NW] [kupfurikidza nokuramba ari asina kuroorwa], iye unoita zvakanaka. Naizvozvo, umomuwanisa unoita zvakanaka; nousingamuwanisi unoita zvinopfuura nokunaka.”a Pauro akanga asati ari kushurikidza vatano inokudzwa muroorano. Panzvimbo pezvo, akanga ari kuratidza kuti muKristu aisarudza kuchengeta umhandara hwake kupfurikidza nokuramba ari asina kuroorwa aizokwanisa kufarikanya kuti a“namatire Ishe, asingakanganiswi.”—1 VaKorinte 7:25, 33-38.

Nokuda kwepwere yechiKristu, ipapoka, umhandara hahusati huri chiratidzo chenyadzi asi chipupuriro cheperero yomumwe kuna Mwari. Sezvinobvumwa, hakusati kuri nyore kuramba wakachena; kuzvidzora kwakati kunodikanwa. Asi Bhaibheri rinotivimbisa kuti “mirairo [yaMwari] hairemi.” (1 Johane 5:3) Wezvamapisarema anotivimbisa, kuti: “Zvinorairwa naJehovha zvakarurama, zvinofadza mwoyo. Murau waJehovha wakaisvonaka, unovhenekera meso.” (Pisarema 19:8) Kutevera nzira dzaMwari kwakanaka nguva dzose, kunobetsera.

‘Kutadzira Muviri Wako’

Mukupesana, Bhaibheri rinotaura pana 1 VaKorinte 6:18, kuti: “Unoita [ufeve, NW] unotadzira muviri wake.” Pasinei zvapo nezvitendero zvegamuchidzanwa zvakakurumbira, hapana ufakazi hwokuti kurega vatano kunokuvadza mumuviri. Ndiko kuita kunova nengozi dzomumuviri! Mumwe chiremba akatanhamara anoti: “Hosha dzinopfuudzwa muvatano dzichapfuurira kuwedzera mukuitika kutoti miitiro yokudzora inobudirira ikagona kushandiswa, uye wedzero yemisi ichangobva kupfuura iyi mukuitika yave iri nemhaka, murutivi, yemwero yakawedzerwa yevatano pakati pavanhu vaduku.”—Current Controversies in Marriage and Family.

Mufambiro wevatano yokusasarura pakati pepwere wakawedzerawo denda remimba dzevachiri kuyaruka. MuUnited States, hafu yeidzi mimba dzinobviswa nokupfupfudza kwokuzvidira kana kuti kwokugombedzerwa. Ipapo kune kuparadzwa kwendangariro uko vatano youtere inogona kuparira. “Pashure pokunge awana zvaakanga ave achida kwenguva yose,” anoyeuka kudaro Diana muduku, “iye akarega kusonganirana neni.” Mashoko aPauro ndeechokwadi. Vatano yapamberi peroorano ‘kutadzira muviri wako.’

Ufeve ‘hunokuvadza[wo] nokutora maruramiro’ avamwe. (1 VaTesaronika 4:6) Zvikurukuru, hunotorera mumwe maruramiro okupinda muroorano ari mumugariro wetsika wakachena. Mukwanyina weroorano womunguva yemberi anobirwawo maruramiro ake okuva nomubiyake weroorano akachena.

Bhuku rinonzi Why Wait Till Marriage? nokudaro rinoita uku kutaura kwakakomba, kuti: “Nechinoitika chako chokutanga chevatano, hauchisirizve akachena. . . . Unogona kusarudza kamwe bedzi.” Ita chisarudzo chakarurama! Usanyengerwa nenhema dzenyika mukufunga kuti chimwe chinhu hachina kururama kwauri kana ukaomerera kumipimo yeBhaibheri. Umhandara hausati huri hwechienzi kana kuti husiri hwomuzvarirwo. Ivatano youtere iyo iri inozvidzisa, inonyadzisa, uye inokuvadza. Kupfurikidza nokuchengeta rucheno rwako, unodzivirira utano hwako, garikano yako yendangariro, uye chinokosha zvikurusa chazvose, ukama hwako naMwari.

Kuti pwere inogona sei chaizvo kuita ikoku kuchava nhau yenyaya dzomunguva yemberi.

[Mashoko Omuzasi]

[Mufananidzo uri papeji 21]

Kune kuganza kwakawanda nokunyepa pamusoro pevatano