Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Ndinokwahlukana Njani Nobomi Obumbaxa?

UAnna uyavuma: “Ndandingayikhathalele yonke into abazali bam ababeyithetha. Ndandinemvukelo kwaye ndaqalisa ukubaxokisa. Ndandiye ndibaxelele ukuba ndiya evenkileni, kodwa enyanisweni ndandisiya kubonana nenkwenkwe.”

UANN wayephila ubomi obumbaxa, ibe kungekudala wayenganeli nje ukungathobeli abazali bakhe kodwa wayengathobeli nesazela sakhe esiqeqeshwe yiBhayibhile. Kaloku, uAnn, wayesiba neentlobano zesini ngokufihlakeleyo nenkwenkwe awayethandana nayo. Ukhumbula oku: “Ndazama ukumkhupha ngokupheleleyo uYehova engqondweni yam.” Noko ke, kungekudala kwafuneka ajamelane nale nyaniso icace gca yokuba ‘into abahlwayela yona abantu, bovuna kwayona.’ (Galati 6:7) UAnn wamitha. Uthi: “Umntwana wam ndimthanda ngentliziyo yam yonke, kodwa oku akumele kwenzeke kuye nabani na. Kuye nabani na umntu ongatshatanga. Kuye nabani na umntu oyedwa.”

Ngaba ngandlel’ ithile uye warhintyeleka ekuphileni ubomi obumbaxa—ufihla oko ukuko kubazali bakho nakwamanye amaKristu? Mhlawumbi uhla unyuka nabahlobo bakho basesikolweni owaziyo ukuba abazali bakho bebengenakukuvumela ukuba ube kunye nabo. Okanye mhlawumbi uwele kwihambo embi enzulu ngakumbi, efana nokutshaya, ukusebenzisa kakubi utywala, okanye iintlobano zesini zangaphambi komtshato. Enoba imeko iyintoni na, njengakwimeko ka-Ann, kungabanga thuba lide oku kuya kuba nemiphumo enzulu.b

Nakuba kunjalo, lumbi ulutsha alusivumeli esi sibakala siluthintele konke konke kwikhondo lalo lemvukelo. Lufana nendoda ezikhangela esipilini ize “ilibale kwaoko ukuba ibinjani na.” (Yakobi 1:23, 24) Sinethemba lokuba wena akunjalo. Mhlawumbi sele uqalisile ukuzihlolisisa—ibe awukuthandi oko ukubonayo. Ufuna ukuguquka. Uyayibona imfuneko yokwenza inguqulelo. Umbuzo ngulo, uyenza njani inguqulelo?

Inguquko—Inyathelo Lokuqala

Okokuqala, umele wenze isigqibo esisengqiqweni sokuguquka. IZenzo 3:19 zikhuthaza zisithi: “Guqukani ke ngoko, nibuye, ukuze zicinywe izono zenu; ngokokuze afike amathuba okuphumza, evela ebusweni beNkosi.” Noko ke, inguquko ingaphezu kwesenzo nje sengqondo. Ukuguquka kuthetha “ukuzisola, ukuba lusizi, okanye ukuzohlwaya ngoko ubani akwenzileyo.” Umbhali weBhayibhile uYakobi wabongoza: “Yibani ziindwayi, nikhedame, nilile; ukuhleka kwenu makujike kube kukukhedama, nalo uvuyo lwenu lube kukuthi dakumba. Zithobeni emehlweni eNkosi.” (Yakobi 4:9, 10) Unokuziva buhlungu njani ngento obusoloko uyinandipha de kube ngoku? Cinga ngendlela ephosakele ngayo. Cinga ngendlela emenze buhlungu ngayo uThixo. Cinga ngeengxaki eziye zabangelwa likhondo lakho elifihlakeleyo nobuxoki ekuye kwafuneka ubuthethile ukuzama ukulifihla. Zikhumbuze ukuba uYehova usithiyile isenzo sokukhohlisa! (INdumiso 5:6) Ukucamngca ngezi nkalo kunokukunceda uphephe ihambo ephosakeleyo engqondweni nangokweemvakalelo.

Noko ke, ukuziva nje ubuhlungu kuphela ngento oyenzayo akwanele. Igatyana lomfana elinguRobert igama, elalibandakanyeke ekusebenziseni kakubi iziyobisi ngokufihlakeleyo, liyavuma: “Ndandingonwabanga. Ndandikwazi ukwahlula okulungileyo kokubi. Sekunjalo, ndaqhubeka ndiphila ubomi obumbaxa.” Ngenxa yoku isenzo senkalipho siyimfuneko! Kweyesi-2 yeziKronike 7:14, uThixo wathi ukuba aboni ‘bayazithoba, bathandaze, bafune ubuso bakhe, babuye ezindleleni zabo ezimbi; uya kuva yena emazulwini, abaxolele izono zabo.’

‘Ukufuna ubuso bukaThixo’ kuthetha ukuya kuye ngomthandazo, uvume isiphoso sakho, uze ucele ukuxolelwa. Oku kusenokungabi yinto elula ukuyenza, kodwa ngokungathandabuzekiyo uya kuziva ukhululekile ngokuba uye wenjenjalo. Umdumisi wathi: “Ndithi ndakuthi cwaka, aluphale amathambo am ngokubhonga kwam imihla yonke. Ngokuba imini nobusuku, besinzima phezu kwam isandla sakho. . . . Ndikwazisile isono sam, ubugwenxa bam andabugquma.”—INdumiso 32:3-5.

Ukuchazela Abazali Bakho

Kukho abanye abantu abafanele bazi ngeengxaki zakho. Kodwa ngoobani? Okwishumi elivisayo ogama linguBrian uyavuma: “Enye yezona mpazamo zam zinkulu yaba kukuya koosingabahlobo bam neengxaki zam kunokuya kumama wam ongumKristu. Kodwa ndandisoyika ukuthetha naye kuba ndandicinga indlela awayeya kuvakalelwa ngayo, ngoko ndaya kubahlobo bam, abasuka nje bandikhokelela kude ngakumbi enyanisweni.” Musa ukwenza impazamo efanayo. Zityand’ igila kubazali bakho abahlonel’ uThixo. (Thelekisa IMizekeliso 23:26.) Banelungelo lokwazi oko ubukwenza. Isahluko 2 sencwadi Imibuzo Yabantu Abaselula—Iimpendulo Eziluncedo sinamacebiso amaninzi ngendlela yokuthetha nabazali bakho ngokuphathelele oku.c

Ngokwemvelo, abanakuvuyiswa kukuba uye wabaxokisa. Kodwa abazali ngokungaguquguqukiyo babathanda ngokunzulu abantwana babo. Umbhali uClayton Barbeau uthi: “Abayi kukuhlamba kuba wenze impazamo okanye kuba ungene kwingxaki ethile. Abantwana baye bamitha, basulelwa sisifo esidluliselwa ngeentlobano zesini, baba nengxaki yotywala okanye yeziyobisi okanye bangena kwenye ingxaki baza bacinga ukuba abazali babo baya kucaphuka gqitha, batshise indlu baze baphel’ emehlweni. Kodwa xa beye bazichaza iingxaki zabo kubazali babo, bafumanise ukuba abazali babo basuka nje babawole babange, baze baxelelwe oku, ‘Usengxakini yokwenene, ibe siza kubona oko sinokukwenza ukuze uphume kuyo.’” Ewe, xa umothuko nomsindo obakho ekuqaleni uphela, inkoliso yabazali izama ukunikela uncedo. Hayi indlela okuyinyaniso ngayo oku xa abazali bengaboyik’ uThixo! Eyona nkxalabo yabo ayimele ibe kukukuhlazisa okanye ukukwenza buhlungu, kodwa imele ibe kukulungisa imicimbi. (Thelekisa uIsaya 1:18.) Basenokude balungiselele ukuba uthethe nabadala bebandla ngokuphathelele oku.—Yakobi 5:14, 15.

Liyinyaniso elokuba, kuya kubakho isohlwayo esifanelekileyo esivela kubazali bakho ekuya kufuneka usinyamezele yaye mhlawumbi neminye imiqathango engqongqo ngakumbi. Kodwa enyanisweni oku kuya kukunceda uphephe ukubuyela emva kwiindlela zakho zangaphambili. Ngapha koko, ukuthetha phandle nabazali bakho nokubona inkathalo yabo enothando kunokuguqula indlela obajonga ngayo. De kube ngoku, mhlawumbi ubuyicaphukela imithetho nemiqathango abakubekela yona. Enye intombazana egama linguPaulette iyavuma: “Kunzima ukwamkela isiluleko nokhokelo esilufumana kubazali bethu. Kodwa ndiye ndaqonda ukuba oku kuyingenelo yethu ibe kubangela ulonwabo oluya kuhlala luhleli.”

Ukutshintsha Izinxulumani Zakho

Kunqabile ukuba oselula aphile ubomi obumbaxa eyedwa. Kusenokuba kukho iqela loontanga bakho abakukhuthazayo kwimvukelo yakho! Ukuze uphephe ukubuyela emva kubomi obubuphila ngasese, kuya kufuneka utshintshe izinxulumani zakho. Umdumisi wathi: “Andihlali namadoda akhohlakeleyo, andihambi nabanyhwalazi [abazifihlayo oko bakuko, NW].” (INdumiso 26:4) Ukuqhawula ubuhlobo obudala akulula. Kusenokufuneka uthandaze njengomdumisi owathi: “Ndisindise endodeni ekhohlisayo, enobugqwetha.” (INdumiso 43:1) Yenza ngokuvisisana nalo mthandazo ngokuxelela izinxulumani zakho ukuba uguqukile ibe uzimisele ukwenza okulungileyo. Kunokuba ngumfundi wangasese kaYesu, xelela abanye ngokholo lwakho. (Thelekisa uYohane 19:38.) Ngokuqhelekileyo, izinxulumani ezibi ngokukhawuleza ziya kuzifunela ezinye izinxulumani.

Okulandelayo, tshintsha izinxulumani ezibi uze ube nabahlobo abalungileyo. Ngaba ulutsha oloyik’ uThixo lunqabile? Ngoko cinga ngomprofeti uYeremiya, owathi: “Andihlalanga embuthweni yabahleki, andidlamkanga nokudlamka; ngenxa yesandla sakho ndahlala ndedwa.” (Yeremiya 15:17) Kuya kuba kokulunge ngakumbi ukuba ube yinkom’ edla yodwa kunokunxulumana nolutsha oluya kukwenza buthathaka ngokomoya. Noko ke, ngokuqhelekileyo, abahlobo bokwenene banokufumaneka ukuba wenza umgudu. Ngokomzekelo, uTammy, waqalisa ukunxulumana nomza wakhe owayengumshumayeli weendaba ezilungileyo wexesha elizeleyo. UTammy ukhumbula oku: “Saba ngabahlobo abasondelelene gqitha. Ngeentsuku endandingayi ngazo esikolweni, ndandihamba naye ukuya kumsebenzi wokushumayela. Oku kwandinceda ndenza iinguqulelo ezithile ebomini bam.”

Omnye umntu oselula waseJamani uthi “eyona nkuselo yokwenene, sisazela esilungileyo, esibakho ngenxa yobuhlobo obusondeleyo noYehova uThixo.” Enye intombazana eselula eyawela ekuphileni ubomi obumbaxa iyavuma: “Andizange ndikhulise ulwalamano olusondeleyo noBawo, uYehova.” Ngenxa yomthandazo nofundisiso lobuqu, yaqalisa ukuguqula izinto. Ngeqhayiya ithi: “Ngoku ndinolwalamano noYehova ekungekho namnye unokuze aluhluthe.” Nawe unokuba nobuhlobo obusondeleyo noThixo. Uya kukukhokela aze akuxhase, kwanaxa ukufumanisa kunzima ukuguqula iindlela zakho ezindala. INdumiso 37:24 ithi ngomkhonzi othembekileyo kaThixo: “Ewile, akayi kuqungquluza, ngokuba nguYehova umxhasi wesandla sakhe.” Ewe, ngoncedo lukaYehova, unokwahlukana nokuphila ubomi obumbaxa.

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 12]

“Ndazama ukumkhupha ngokupheleleyo uYehova engqondweni yam”

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 12]

Umele wenze isigqibo esisengqiqweni sokuguquka

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 13]

Bachazele abahlobo bakho abadala ukuba uguqukile yaye akusayi kubathelela ekwenzeni okubi